Investing Elliot
by Sasha Cameron
Summary: Bk 1: It's canon, Jim, but not as you know it. This is Kate and Elliot's love story as it unfolded alongside Christian and Ana's. Ever wondered what happened on their first night together? Or what did Kate and Christian talk about in Portland? What happened in Barbados and how did Elliot get invited? Careful, you might end up liking Kate! Revised chapters appear on my blog.
1. Chapter 1

**_You're a fraud and you know it_**

**_But it's too good to throw it all away _**

**_Anyone would do the same _**

**_You've got 'em going _**

**_And you're careful not to show it _**

**_Sometimes you even fool yourself a bit it's like magic _**

**_But it's always been a smoke and mirrors game _**

**_Anyone would do the same _**

**_Smoke and Mirrors - Gotye _**

Writer Gotye 2011

* * *

**_Kate's World_**

In my world you learn not to trust too easily. The smoke, the mirrors — they are all an illusion - a darkness, a deception, a misdirection - in which it is all too easy to you lose your true sense of self. If you know enough of the right people, are seen in the right places, can spin the right spin, then it is easy to blur the lines between right and wrong. However, if you are aware of the games being played, then deception is often easy to recognize in others. The false platitudes, the disingenuous smiles, the fake flattery. It is a truism - the more beautiful the people, the uglier their lies. Look - can you see? A moment of hesitation, followed by a backhanded compliment loaded with envy, and a touch of lust lurking just beneath the surface.

This is the world I was born into. I attended the right schools, lived in the right neighborhoods, knew the right people. It was all about networks. Whose version of 'right'? Well — theirs? Yours? Ours? Who knows?

Mine is a media family. My father and grandfather built empires in global media, doing their time at the news desk before ascending the throne to rule their fiefdoms. I always knew I wanted to end up here. Partly because I have a nose for a good story and partly because I have a deep desire to hold the mirror up to the world. I know the secrets, I smell their crap, I know where to dig.

To the world I am just another one of the beautiful people. Connected, well-educated, well-spoken. My looks open doors, even more than trading on my father's name. I am not afraid to use either.

So when an enigma like Christian Grey walks through this world, I feel the need to crack his code. We are similar, he and I. Too attractive for the rest of the world to leave alone. Too aware of how they perceive that beauty to trust others. Keeping a distance, keeping secrets. He comes from a family of beautiful people; his mother - a doctor, his father - a lawyer, his brother and sister talented, successful and beautiful like him. They flit through our world of shadows and light, assuming a mantle of philanthropy but I know there are secrets and lies underneath. There always are.

My feet straddle the border between two worlds. One I was born into and one where I breathe. That second world is a simpler one, where caring and hard work count. Where good friends can be relied upon. Where the secrets are harder to keep. My good friend, my best friend Ana, lives in this other world. Refreshingly welcome in my life, she doesn't lie, she doesn't pretend, she doesn't watch with envy waiting for me to fall. There's no competition because she lacks guile. She simply doesn't see that she could command in that other world. For her, it as a space I inhabit, apart from her, and she seems to like it that way. Friends like Ana are hard to find. I cherish that friendship as I would a sister.

So it is with a sense of foreboding that I sent her stumbling into his world on my behalf. I had no choice. It was the interview of a lifetime and I was too sick to lift my head off the pillow. Ana was my back up plan. I deliberately told her nothing about him, reasoning that the less she knew the safer she would be. In and out. Get the story and never set foot there again. How wrong could I be?

* * *

_**A/N:**_

_**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.**_

_**These characters and the canon storyline belongs to EL James. The character motivations and alternative plotlines are from my imagination and are shaped by the wonderful reviewers and Betas who challenge and assist me in so many ways. **_

_**Song Lyrics are the property of the original writers and artists. **_

_**Please visit my blog /**_

_**Please Review**_


	2. Chapter 2

**_I want you to want me _**

**_I need you to need me _**

**_I'd love you to love me_**

**_I'm beggin' you to beg me _**

**_I Want You To Want Me – Cheap Trick_**

Writer – Rick Nielsen (1977)

* * *

I can hear it. Ana is flushed with what? Embarrassment? Excitement? As she tells me about her encounter with Christian Grey. He just _happened_ to drop into Clayton's Hardware, where she works, to buy some supplies. Traveled _all the way_ from Seattle to Portland to do this. _On a Saturday!_ _Why do you think this is sane and rational activity? Are you nuts?_

"But what was he doing at Clayton's?" _Think through the possibilities here, Ana, surely you must see that this is NOT normal behavior._ This guy must be seriously into her. Creep!

"He was in the area." _Yeah right, and he just happened to drop into your place of work, accidentally. Wake up and smell the roses Ana! _

"I think that is one huge coincidence, Ana. You don't think he was there to see you?" _For fuck's sake! _I love Ana, but she takes naive to whole new level.

"He was visiting the farming division of WSU. He's funding some research," she mutters, and I hear the disappointment she tries so hard to hide. _Oh, no Ana. He is just a pretty face. You can do so much better. _

Playing along with her view of the world is all I can do, although I don't believe for one minute that this is a coincidence. No billionaire businessman drops into hardware stores to shop for a start. He has people who do this. Ana's lack of guile is usually charming but in this case there is a whole lump of stupid in the mix.

"Oh, yes. He's given the department a $2.5 million grant." I offer. _Well, that just made things worse._ Her despondent tone speaks volumes.

"How do you know this?" _Come on, Ana. I'm a reporter_ – or I will be once I start my internship at my father's media company in a few weeks time. Graduation is just around the corner and once I have had a relaxing, exotic beach holiday, my real life will begin.

"Ana, it's my job, this is what I do. You know I've written a profile on this guy." Although, I have to admit I am a little disappointed by the things I don't know about Christian Grey. For a start, he has secrets. I am sure of it. But there is not a sniff of scandal around his personal life except for the endless speculation about his homosexuality, and that has never been proven. The guy is a shadow.

_What are you up to Christian Grey? Why this sudden interest in my room mate?_ Not that Ana isn't totally worthy of his attention. She is beautiful and funny. Forthright and loyal. Few people get close enough to know this about her and I count myself as one of the lucky ones . I bet she can keep secrets too. _Yes, Ana could give you a run for your money, Mr Grey, but if you are going to mess with my girl you will have me to answer to. _

"Okay, Carla Bernstein, keep your hair on. So do you want these photos?" _Do I ever! _

"Of course I do." A plan is hatching in my mind. I could get Levi to do the photos, of course. As staff photographer on the student newspaper, he would jump at the chance. But wouldn't it be more interesting to put our dear friend, Jose and Christian Grey in the same room? Jose, who has had a crush on Ana for as long as I can remember. Then I would know exactly what the connection between Ana and Grey was and how much protection she might need from me as her best friend. A little misdirection is in order. I try to keep my question as innocent as possible. "The question is, who is going to do them and where?"

"We could ask him where. He says he's staying in the area." _Interesting. Why so close Mr Grey? _

"You can contact him?" I ask.

"I have his cell phone number." _Shit!_ I have been working on this guy for months and Ana has his private number in a matter of a few days! This guy is seriously into her and she doesn't seem to see it coming.

"The richest, most elusive, most enigmatic bachelor in Washington State just gave you his cell phone number?" I can almost hear her brain clicking over the phone. _Come on, Ana. He is so into you!_

"Er…yes." Typical Ana, not giving anything away.

"Ana! He likes you. No doubt about it." I say, stating the obvious. Surely she can see this for what it is. This man, the most eligible bachelor in Seattle, possibly the greater Western area, is seriously, if not pursuing, then at least making himself available to her. The thought both terrifies and excites me. I don't want to push her too hard because she will run a mile from him. Maybe I should push, just to keep her safe. I don't ever want Ana to be broken by the shit that can happen in my world. For all I know Grey might have a kinky fetish that he wants to dump on Ana, and she, being such an innocent, will just get hurt by the disappointment that he is less than perfect. I couldn't bear that for her.

"Kate, he's just trying to be nice." _Yeah, Christian Grey doesn't do nice._ Shit, she is going to continue to play this down and perhaps for her sake I should too. But I can't help thinking that this is the work of a highly effective stalker. This guy has found out where my quiet, mousey room mate lives and works. He turns up on a day when she is at work, which is not easy since she is only there part time and will be finishing up in a few days. He has traveled out of his way to find her and just 'run into her'. I don't believe for a second that he hasn't orchestrated this whole thing and I am worried for Ana but I can't let her know this. Not yet anyway. Not until I can get to see them together. I need to know what her interest in him is, as well. She may very well need protection. I would seriously hate to see Ana in pink flannelette pj's, scoffing down Ben & Jerry's in an effort to forget her pain. Of course, a broken heart might be the least of her worries. It's time to put this plan into action and I will need Jose there to get this all into perspective. I just hope that Jose doesn't get hurt too.

"I don't know who we'll get to do the shoot. Levi can't." I lie smoothly, feeling a little guilty. Levi will have a fit when he hears I cut him out of this project. "He's home in Idaho Falls for the weekend. He'll be pissed that he blew an opportunity to photograph one of America's leading entrepreneurs." _Come on Ana, take the bait. _

"Hmmm…What about Jose?" _Bingo! _

"Great idea! You ask him – he'll do anything for you. Then call Grey and find out where he wants us." I'll have to square this with Jose later but given his unrequited love for Ana, I can't see him refusing. Right now I need to hand the organization to her. Grey is now her contact, after all. Besides, if Ana gets Jose to do this then I get to convince myself not to feel so bad about trying to get the three of them in the same room. It won't be my fault and I can casually observe the dynamics without feeling like a complete ass.

"I think you should call him." _Shit, Grey or Jose? _

"Who, Jose?" I ask, feigning innocence. I don't want to call either of them but I will if I have to.

"No, Christian Grey." She says his name almost reverently. _Scared Ana? No, this is one that you are going to handle Miss Steele. Let's just see how far you can push Mr Christian Grey. _

"Ana, you're the one with the relationship." God, relationship? From what I know Christian Grey doesn't do relationships.

"Relationship? " She squeaks, echoing my thoughts. "I barely know the guy."

"At least you've met him." This irks me. I have been trying to meet with him for months. Damn flu. I am seriously pissed off with her now. This guy wants to see her. It is the only reason he has agreed to any of this. I need to shut this down now before I say something I can't take back. "And it looks like he wants to know you better. Ana, just call him."

I hang up the phone. Shit, was that enough to make her do it? I know that I have been able to coerce her into doing things in the past but there are lines that Ana Steele will not cross not even for her best friend. I have never seen her drunk, I have never seen her get laid. She doesn't blow off classes very often and she certainly doesn't take money from friends and family. Even rich friends who can afford it and have her best interests at heart. Being complicit in setting up a mogul might be one line she won't cross. So will she do this? Will she call him?

Part of me is seriously curious about this as a social experiment. I would like to get some good dirt on Christian Grey and perhaps this is a way of getting to know him. But do I really want to see Ana hurt by someone who is only looking for his next big purchase? He probably collects little girls like Ana as notches on a bed post and I don't ever want to see her hurt like that. She will fall in love and guys like Christian Grey and his brother Elliot, they break hearts. I have known guys like this all my life. _Shit, shit, shit._ I hope this doesn't backfire.

* * *

_**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.**_

_**These characters and the canon storyline belongs to EL James. The character motivations and alternative plot lines are from my imagination and are shaped by the wonderful reviewers and Betas who challenge and assist me in so many ways. **_

_**Song Lyrics are the property of the original writers and artists. Please visit my blog **_

_**Please review - your words matter!**_


	3. Chapter 3

**_Recline complete dream too sweet _**

**_I can't do it not with you _**

**_Not even with you _**

**_Maybe never with you _**

**_And I'd sell my soul for Total control_**

**_Total Control – The Motels _**

* * *

Later that evening it transpires that I have to engage in a little coercion with Jose as well. When Ana calls him I can hear his resistance to her attempts echoing down the telephone. He comes over all I'm-an-artiste telling her he only does landscapes and not portraits. Funny how he forgets that, in his more besotted Victim-of-unrequited-love moments, I have seen him snapping photos of Ana when she isn't watching. For that reason alone I am so going to get him to sign on for this Grey gig.

Finally I can't stand the two of them tip-toeing around each other. I grab the phone off Ana, whose jaw hits the ground. Yeah, yeah, controlling and impatient, that's my MO. Within seconds I am reading him the riot act simultaneously threatening not to cover his photographic exhibition if he doesn't help us out. Jose and I both know that I could get Levi in a heartbeat. All prior commitments aside, no photographer worth his salt would miss this opportunity. I don't know if he smells a rat but I barrel on regardless because I need Jose there for Ana's sake. She needs to see Jose and Christian Grey together and, given my morbid curiousity, so do I.

Once the carrot is thrown out there in terms he can understand, Jose's tone changes and he capitulates all too easily to the Kavanagh charm. I'm not completely fooled. If there is any visible chemistry between Ana and Christian Grey then Jose will ream me out later. He just won't do it if there is any chance that Ana might be listening.

Once I have secured Jose's agreement I thrust the phone back at Ana and make her call Christian Grey. I can hear his abrupt, business like tone when he answers. He is very short on the phone, a trait I recognize in my father and one that I try to emulate myself from time to time. Ana looks a little like a startled deer but when she says who she is the strangest thing happens. His whole demeanor changes, and this seductive rumble reverbirates through the phone line and across the room. Now it's my turn to stand there like a stunned goldfish. _What the hell? _

Ana finally senses me listening and heads for the kitchen for some privacy. Watching her I realise that she's shaken by him. Hell, I would be too, and that kind of surprises me. My curiosity gets the better of me and I follow her quietly. Her body is frozen and there is a tremble in her hand that matches the one in her voice which is all breathy and interesting. She doesn't notice me standing there until the end of the conversation. When she turns to face me I see the completely mind-fucked, beet-red look on her face and that precious moment when she finally releases her breath. _Oh, girlfriend, you've got it bad!_

"Anastasia Rose Steele. You like him! I've never seen or heard you so…so…affected by anyone before. You're actually blushing." I know that I shouldn't be listening. I certainly shouldn't be pushing but this is a side of Ana Steele that I have never seen in all our four years of friendship. Anyone would say that this breathless and lusting look suits her but it scares the shit out of me. Poor little innocent Ana has no idea if this guy could be really dangerous. And if he has spent all these years never being seen with any woman in the social pages then what does he do with the dead bodies?

When I point out the physical effect he is having on her she snaps back at me about blushing all the time. Bullshit. Then says something that really worries me.

"I just find him…intimidating, that's all." _Oh Ana. That is not all and it's not right. If you are going to fall for a guy don't let him be someone who intimidates you. _

I turn away muttering about organizing space at the Heathman Hotel. It figures that he would be staying there and I know that I am going to have to use his name to get the staff at the Heathman to cooperate. In the end it isn't difficult. I can hear the saliva dripping off the tongue of the Heathman concierge as I discuss our needs for the photo shoot. _Yeah, get your tongue back in your head, dude, you're one blow job short of becoming Christian Grey's bitch. _Everyone wants a slice of Sir Grey. Including, it would seem, my timid little friend, Ana.

_But what is it that you want from her, Mr Grey? Why are you pursuing a graduate student so ardently? And if you manage to get her, what damage are you going to inflict when you drop her in favor of your next shiny toy?_

I am brought back to the present by the effusive gushing coming out of my phone speaker as the concierge reminds me about what a valued customer Christian Grey is for the Heathman. In the end I promise credit to the hotel in the article so the concierge agrees to give us the space for free. Of course, he would have given it for Christian Grey's continued patronage anyway and he wouldn't want to risk Christian Grey's ire by not cooperating with me. But we both make out that we have struck a good deal. As I put down the phone I realise that I have been witness to the Christian Grey Effect. Luckily, with my background, I will be impervious to it. That will free me up to worry about how to deal with the fallout of Ana's broken heart.

* * *

_**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.**_

_**These characters and the canon storyline belongs to EL James. The character motivations and alternative plotlines are from my imagination and are shaped by the wonderful reviewers and Betas who challenge and assist me in so many ways. **_

_**Song Lyrics are the property of the original writers and artists. Please visit my blog **_

_**Please review**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N: I always wondered why Kate had never met the Grey brother before. If she is connected and the daughter of a media boss then there is a chance that they might have moved in the same circles long before Christian became a billionaire. There is a deviation from the original story here. Elliot announces that he is from Casey-Grey Construction. In this story he has a business partner, James Casey. Some of the dialogue from FSoG is used to contextualize the events.**_

* * *

**_When I walk in the spot,(yea) this is what I see (okaay) _**

**_Everybody stops and they starin' at me _**

**_I got passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it, show it, show it, show it… _**

**_I'm sexy and I know it_**

**_-Sexy and I Know It – LMFAO-_**

* * *

There's plenty of time between arriving at the Heathman and our appointment with Christian Grey to set up for the shoot but in my anxiety I'm pushing everyone to their limits. Taking control of the organization is second nature but there's a moment where telling Jose and his assistant, Travis, where they should put their gear earns me a don't-tell-us-how-to-suck-eggs look from both of them. Generally, Jose and I work well together and I've often wondered if he isn't wasting his time doing an engineering degree. However, today I am being an officious bitch and he looks like he wants to take my clipboard and shove it up my ass. We've had enogh of those drunken conversations in the past, where I've promised to get him a job at Kavanagh Media but Jose is smart and committed to supporting his family. He doesn't see photography as the way to do that. It's a shame and a colossal waste of talent.

Ana hovers nervously, glancing at the door every few minutes. I wish she would calm the fuck down. One of the hotel marketing-execs turns up and tries to throw his weight around. In retaliation, I turn on the charm and get the requisite salivation from the idiot's slackened mouth. _Yeah, yeah, tongue back in and eyes on the face, big boy. _Soon he's putty in my hands as he bends over backwards to bring us refreshments, even helping move the furniture around. Ana looks disapproving but I can't help it if some men are so easy to manipulate. They fall over themselves at the feet of a pretty face and a nice rack. Just once, it would be nice if a man noticed my intelligence before he started drooling at the package but hell, if you've got it flaunt it, I always say.

On the other hand, I could be more like Ana and be so averse to the limelight that the world never gets to see how smart and beautiful she is. Centre stage is not her style and I kind of envy her complete lack of vanity. She never seems to need the affirmation. Me - I'm so used to having to work to get people to really see _me_ and not just the face, that I'm not sure I know any other way.

As for the way I am treating everyone else? My uber-officious mode takes over and I know how domineering I'm coming across as I order them all around. Glancing at Ana and Jose, I recognize that this is more than just a story for the newspaper. We are all nervous for different reasons and so much is hanging on what happens in the next half hour or so. I want to keep everyone busy so that they don't start thinking too much, especially Ana. I keep firing out orders to distract myself from watching her tying herself up in knots with anxiety over Christian Grey.

Suddenly our time is up and he arrives with his bodyguard in tow, sweeping into the room as if he owns it. Which he probably does. Immediately I see what all the fuss is about. Photos simply don't do him justice. If he is gorgeous in digital print, then he is truly staggering in real life. He's so relaxed and stylish drawing us all into the Christian Grey web. But when he greets Ana I see the one thing I was hoping to avoid. There is nobody else in this room right at this moment but them. _Fuck._ They both stare at each other, her like she wants to curl up at his feet and him like he wants to eat her. If I weren't seeing it with my own eyes, I would never believe it and I can feel the tension emanating in waves from Jose.

Eventually Ana recovers some equilibrium and remembers to introduce me. _Right, Grey, let's see what you've got._ I look him straight in the eye. _You are not going to intimidate me Grey, this is my show. And I know your type. _I try to stare him down before I realize that he is… what? …laughing at me? _Fuck off, Grey, you're not all that._

"The tenacious Miss Kavanagh. How do you do? I trust you're feeling better? Anastasia said you were unwell last week." _Anastasia! What is up with this guy?_ He sounds like a headmaster talking about a naughty school girl. _Anastasia was caught smoking a cigarette in the girls' bathroom. She will have to submit to a severe punishment until she admits remorse and changes her recalcitrant ways._

"I'm fine, thank you, Mr Grey." I smile and shake his hand but my jaw is so tightly clenched I think my teeth might break. I simply don't trust this man. There is something very off here and I'm resisting the overwhelming urge to throw Ana into my car and drive her away from here at high speed. My private school education and manners kick in. _I am not going to take any shit from you, Grey._ "Thank you for taking the time out of your busy schedule to do this."

Ana seems to sense the tension and steps in to introduce Jose and Travis. I can see him eying Jose. The testosterone kicks up a level as Jose squares his shoulders as he asserts himself in the room. He doesn't have Christian Grey's height but his muscular physique is well-defined and he is just as pretty in an exotic latte kind of way.

_Yeah, Grey, Jose can take you on. Of course, he doesn't have your… resources…but the slightest indication from Ana and you won't get a look in. Better still he isn't from our world, Grey; you can't intimidate him. _In that moment, I couldn't be more proud of Jose and I delight in seeing Christian Grey's hackles go up.

"Where would you like me?" Grey addresses his question in a calm but threatening tone to Jose, which just pisses me off. _Number one, Jose is worth ten of you Christian Grey, number two, this is my show and three, don't asking leading questions because I have this enticing vision of you straddling an exercise bike with no seat on it, feel me? Don't ignore me in favor of your little all-male stand-off._

"Mr Grey – if you could sit here, please? Be careful of the lighting cables. And then we'll do a few standing, too." Secretly, I would really love him to trip over the lighting cables but then we would be dealing in litigation and I suspect that my small victory would be overshadowed by Christian Grey's phenomenal legal resources. I direct him to a chair against the wall. Then Jose takes over and I try to hide a smile as I hear Jose all but ordering Grey to turn this way and that. He's in his element as he subtly, quickly and efficiently manipulates Grey's movements, . _Oh yeah, take that Grey._ But then I notice the looks that are passing between Ana and Grey. Jose might have control of the photography; Grey has complete control of Ana. The devil inside of me decides to shake it up again.

"Enough sitting." He looks far too comfortable anyway. "Standing, Mr Grey?" He stands and Travis removes the chair. Jose starts clicking away and Christian Grey just oozes supermodel. Bastard.

Five or ten minutes later Jose has had enough. The standing hasn't made it any better. Christian Grey just can't be made to look bad. This is something, probably the only thing we have in common. The perfect looks make it both too easy and extremely difficult for both of us. Me, I get taken in by guys so quickly who make me think they see me but turn out to only want the pretty face or the money and connections. When I start to feel a little empathy with Christian Grey I mentally kick myself. I don't want to feel anything for him.

At the end of the shoot I shake his hand, as do Jose and Travis before Ana guides him to the door. The next thing I know he's asking Ana to walk with him. _What the? _They leave the room with us staring after them like stunned mullets.

"What the hell is that all about?" Jose asks me his eyes not leaving the door. _Oh shit. _I get an attack of the guilts knowing that Jose is going to get hurt by this_._ For the last couple of years I have watched Jose fall more in love with Ana and up until now I thought he might have stood a chance. Seems like he has just been eclipsed.

"You have just witnessed all the charisma that money can buy." I make no effort to disguise the sarcasm in my voice. Jose looks at me. "Don't be too intimidated by him Jose. It's just a pretty face."

"Yeah and a bottomless bank account," he mutters. He looks thoroughly dejected and my heart goes out to him.

"Look, do you really think that Ana is going to be swayed by money? She's not that kind of girl and you know it. But if you want her… really want her…then I wouldn't leave my run too late. I think Mr Grey has designs on our Ana and you don't want that particular ship to sail. I have an awful feeling that given a chance he will hurt her," I state quietly.

"Should I go after her?" He's looking for approval I simply can't give. If he really wants her he may need to grow a pair which doesn't seem likely when he is acting like lovesick puppy. The object of his affection walks back in the room asking me to swap cars so she can go off and have coffee with Christian Grey. Every bone in my body wants to say no but I don't. Part of me hopes that if she goes with him she might just get him out of her system but somehow I doubt it. I can feel Jose getting more and more despondent beside me and I hustle Ana out as quickly as possible with a warning to stay safe.

We continue packing up the gear in silence when I sense a new presence in the room. I look up and all the breath leaves my body. Elliot Grey is standing in the doorway, looking thoroughly gorgeous in black jeans and shirt. His longish, dark blond hair is combed back off his face and his blue eyes search the room. They settle on me and I'm forced to stop what I am doing. I know who he is from my research and the countless appearances his photo has made in the social pages.

"Hi. I'm looking for Christian Grey. The concierge said he would be here." He smiles, a full-blown Sex God smile and I feel my legs start to shake. _Wow, how does he do that?_ Unbelievably, all the words have just gone from my head and I have no thought except how beautiful he is. He has a kind of surfer-boy chic going on but with the build of a super-jock. I have to remind myself to close my mouth.

Jose looks from me to him and shrugs. "Mr Grey has left the building. He's gone for coffee with Ana," he states simply and continues packing.

Elliot looks questioningly at me. "Ana?" This has thrown him and suddenly I am back in the room.

"Yes, Ana Steele, my assistant." I feel Jose and Travis looking at me. I keep going hoping that they don't contradict me. "We've been here doing a photo shoot for my newspaper. I'm Kate Kavanagh, editor of the WSU Student Standard." _For a few more days anyway._ I step up to him but he's so tall I have to tip my head back before extending my hand. He takes it and I feel the shock. _Shit, what is wrong with me?_ Then I see it in his eyes. He felt it too.

"Not Sam Kavanagh's daughter? Of Kavanagh media?" he asks smiling, not looking letting go of my hand. Oh, his smile is so enticing and I have no desire to pull away.

"The very same. Have we met before?" I know that we haven't, I would have remembered. Given we move in similar social circles, it is a wonder we haven't crossed paths at some point before now but somehow we never have. I am beginning to regret that.

"Elliot Grey, Casey-Grey Construction and older, better looking brother of the recalcitrant Christian Grey." He smirks and it's enough to break the spell. _Oh such a finely tuned sense of self-worth, Mr Grey? Let's see what we can do about that. _

"Mmm…I am sure some might say that, if only to stroke your massive ego." I smile back. A flash of anger crosses his eyes and a shadow of petulance. _Shit, did I go too far? _

"Why, Miss Kavanagh! Claws, so early in our relationship! Who would have thought?"

"Mr Grey, I don't believe we have a relationship." _Where have I heard that before?_ I smile sweetly. _But oh, I want one, right now on the floor of this room._ _If only Jose and Travis weren't here._ On cue, they begin carting cases and equipment out of the room towards the elevator leaving me alone with Elliot Grey.

"I think you might be kidding yourself, baby." His low voice is no louder than a whisper and I am both attracted and repelled by his presumption. My traitorous body wants him badly but my logical mind is urging me to reach up and slap him into the middle of next week. "Thinking of slapping me angel?" He leans down towards me and I am appalled that he can read my mind.

"I wouldn't want to sully my hand, Mr Grey." _Yeah, lie to yourself Kavanagh. _

"I'm a little disappointed by that, Miss Kavanagh…Katherine… Kate… Katie." He leans in even closer, his voice dropping down a tone with every utterance of my name until the last comes as a low husky whisper again. The stud has me almost pinned against the door frame. _Shit! Where are Jose and Travis?_ For once in my life I feel totally out of my depth with this … Viking Fabio. Not because he is so gorgeous, or because I feel physically intimidated but because even though he isn't touching me, that electricity still charges the air between us. No mere man ever makes me feel like this.

"Feeling a little impotent, Mr Grey. What a shame?" I choke out, desperately trying not to look away. I don't want him to have the upper hand. His face takes on a look of pain, as if I have kicked him. I almost reach out to touch and reassure him even though I know it's all an act.

"Ouch," he whispers. He straightens himself away from me, hand on his heart and I feel a little bereft of his proximity. At that moment the elevator door opens across the hall and Travis and Jose shuffle through as we move to the side. They pick up more gear and move back past us.

"We should be ready to go in 15 minutes Kate." Jose says to me. They keep moving to the elevator and are gone again.

"Well, Katie. What can we do in 15 minutes?" Elliot Grey is smiling at me, arms folded. No one ever calls me Katie and gets away with it except my Dad. Elliot Grey has said it twice in the past few minutes. The smug smirk is back on his face and I struggle to repress a giggle. Suddenly we are both laughing and the tension is broken. I pull away from him and head into the suite to pick up my things. He follows me, taking my jacket and holding it out for me as I shrug it on.

"Thanks," I murmur, throwing my bag over my shoulder. His hands reach out to straighten my collar and those pesky electric shocks shoot through my body again. I'm fighting the urge to turn into his arms and bury my head in his chest. He slides his hand from my shoulder down to the small of my back and I arch against him gently. We both pause and look at each other for a moment. _He's going to kiss me. Fuck, I really want him to kiss me._

"Let me walk you to the elevator, Katie," he murmurs and gently starts to guide me. We are both silent as we wait.

The elevator arrives and without breaking contact he walks me into it. The doors shut and he pushes buttons for the lobby with his free hand. I can't breathe properly with him so close. His proximity is stimulating and unnerving and nothing like I have ever felt before. Christian Grey is gorgeous and beautiful in a dark and brooding way but he's cold. Elliot Grey is like the sun; all blond, tanned and rugged. More importantly, like the sun there is this gravitational pull between us and I feel like I am a planet caught in his orbit.

The doors finally open and I hear him release his breath. At least he isn't completely unaffected by this thing between us. I glance up at him and he has his eyes closed as if he's trying to steady himself. When he opens them and looks at me I see this amazing intensity. _Oh, God, you're gonna need more ice cream, Kavanagh. _As we step into the lobby, I can't understand why I want so much for him to fold me in his arms. I'm not the cuddly, possessive type and I've never really been into public displays of affection but I want this man very badly and I don't really care who knows it.

Once more, as if he's reading my freaking mind, he murmurs, "I want very much to kiss you, Katie Kavanagh, and I cannot for the life of me work out why." My heart skips a beat as we walk towards the revolving door.

Turning to face him, I see the turmoil in his eyes. How can this be happening so fast? This is like some kind of bad romance novel plot complete with bodice ripping in the first chapter. People don't fall in love at first sight. Especially not beautiful people. We know better than to trust an instant attraction. It always ends badly.

Feigning bravado, I reach up and place my palm gently on his face. "You'll get over it, Grey." Then I turn on shaky legs to walk through the revolving door with his laughter echoing behind me.

"Laters, baby." I fractionally hesitate but don't look back. Stepping into the spring sunshine I begin breathing again. _What the hell was that?_ I try desperately not to look back at him as I climb into the car but I can't help myself. He leans casually on a door frame watching me. I blush…hell, I never blush. He laughs and gives a little wave. _Oh my, what happened here? _


	5. Chapter 5

**_Your beauty takes my breath away _**

**_Oh how to love this way _**

**_You take my breath away_**

**_-You Take My Breath Away – Tiffany Eckhardt-_**

* * *

How do you write about perfection? I try very hard not to dwell on the creeping ugly that I feel thinking about Ana and Christian Grey as they walked out of the Heathman. She still hasn't arrived back and my nerves are shot as I go from a story that borders on defamation and my anxiety with every glance at the door. I don't know what I think I saw in Mr Grey. If boxing at shadows fits as a metaphor for all the doubts I have about him then that is what I have been doing for the last few hours as I immerse myself in finishing the Christian Grey article.

My attempts at total impartiality in this report are futile and I desperately want to vent my spleen on the arrogance and charm of the Grey men. My keyboard is spouting forth about his philanthropy while a chill continues to work its way up and down my spine. And then there is Elliot Grey. What I wouldn't like to say about him. So sure of himself in that honey-drips-from-his-lips way. While I was with him I was like on the thousands beautiful airheads that probably grace his revolving door bedroom. Totally overcome by an unreasonable desire for his body that I couldn't think. Now that I have distance, I also have perspective. He is probably worse than his brother. All wolf in sheeps clothing. Ugh!

In my frustration over the two of them I concentrate so hard I almost don't notice Ana as she walks into the apartment. In fact, if she hadn't had to walk past me then I think she would have snuck straight into her bedroom. When I do glance up I see red, watery eyes and a slight flush to her pale skin. Her eyes are cast down as if to say 'don't ask' and I shouldn't but I can't help myself. My anger, barely suppressed by the act of writing leaps to the fore. What the fuck has that son of a bitch Christian Grey done now? I don't question my assumptions. It has to be he who has reduced my normally unflappable friend to tears.

I don't leap in and accuse him. My investigative reporter skills are better than that and it takes a while to get her to talk. When she finally does, she comes up with a bogus story about a bicycle nearly knocking her down. Now, the being knocked down bit I can accept since Ana is not the most graceful or coordinated person on the planet, but crying about it? I don't believe that for one second.

In normal girl world I should be happy that my best friend may have snagged Seattle's most eligible bachelor. If I was any sort of friend I would leave them to work their way through it while I make supportive comments from the sidelines. Ana should be able to count on me to be the cheerleader in her life, wishing her well and urging her forth. I just wish I could put my finger on just what is wrong with this whole Christian Grey I jealous because it is her and not me? Could I possibly be as petty and shallow as all of those bitches I went to high school with?

In relaying the story of the near miss she claims that he saved her. Plucked her from the jaws of death, just in time. So is this some sort of hero complex? Is she projecting? Then there is the fact that she went for coffee with him when she hates coffee. Okay, granted that is petty and if he was mooning over me I would have been hard pressed to say no to his invitation too. Am I pissed that she blew off her friends? Ana doesn't do stuff like that and it was one little date. She is entitled to one little date.

Perhaps it is because she is mooning over him in a very un-Ana way. It's like he has sucked her into his vortex. I mean the pull of attraction between them was so evident in that room today. They couldn't take their eyes off each other. Every time one of them moved the other followed with either their body or their eyes. Maybe it is that magnetism that has me feeling uncomfortable. He certainly didn't have that affect on me. His brother on the other hand...don't go there, Kate.

As much as I love Ana, I can't work out why. It isn't that she isn't beautiful because she is. It's just that she doesn't have that guile, that seductive sophistication that many women have. Personally, I think that is a positive trait but a guy like Christian must see an awful lot of women. Or a lot of awful women. What does he want from her? As much as I love her, and I know there are dozens of guys on campus who would give their left testicle for a shot with her, I don't get what Grey's deal is. His interest seems far from benign and I can see that Ana, my beautiful friend seems to have been blindsided by it.

But I can't say any of this. As much as I might want to talk her out of whatever she is feeling, I know that my girl has never shown an interest in any man, even the stunningly gorgeous Jose. I feel compelled to support her while she explores this... attraction, so although it irks me, I go into a half-hearted cheerleading mode.

"He likes you, Ana." She steps out of my concerned embrace and turns to hug herself as a visible shiver shakes her body. It breaks my heart. She doesn't trust easily and I can tell she doesn't trust him. But that hypnotic attraction is working its way under her skin. It seems that Christian Grey is too much to resist. For the first time in a long time I begin to pray.

"Not anymore. I won't be seeing him again." She is trying to be circumspect but I can tell she feels hurt. _Dear God in heaven, please don't let the steely-eyed fucker hurt my friend. _

All I can trust myself to say is "Oh?". I want to tell her that he would be lucky to have her. That he is up to no good and this is far from over. I want to tell her about my encounter with his gorgeous but somewhat flippant brother. None of this seems appropriate just now so I let the silence stretch.

She looks at me sadly, "Yeah, he's out of my league, Kate." _Oh, Ana, you are so out of his. _I hate what he is doing to her. Always insecure, she doesn't need to be reminded by the likes of him that she thinks so little of herself. That prick should worship the ground that she walks on and the air that she breathes. I am so fucking angry at him right now. And if his brother thinks he is coming anywhere near me again then he has another thing coming. Time to pull out the self esteem fairy.

"What do you mean, sweetie?" I ask trying to keep my voice neutral. I want her to tell me what she's thinking so that I can, in the way of best friends, shoot her insecurities down in flames. I might not be able to talk him down but I can least talk her up.

"Oh, Kate, it's obvious." She walks into the kitchen away from me, probably to hide the doubt writ large on her face. As I follow behind her she whirls around to look at me, a kind of resigned innocence. I would prefer her to be mad. Or a little desperate but she's doing a good line in blank. To anyone else she would appear not to care but I know her better than this. It's an act. _Come on, Ana. Give me an opening here. _

"It's not obvious, Ana. Not to me or anyone else who knows you well." I pause but get nothing. "Okay, yes, he's got more money than you, but then he has more money than most people in America!" _And I know that the money means nothing to you, Ana but just try telling me that you are not smart enough or pretty enough. Then you're going to get the Kavanagh full treatment._

If she could only see the way that they're all lining up for her. Jose, Christian Grey, Paul Clayton, hell, even my brother would love a piece of Ana action but I have threatened him with bodily harm if he ever thinks of going there. Not one of them is fit to lick her boots but she never notices the drooling hoards. She simply doesn't understand how incredibly attractive she is. If I batted for the other team, hell, I would tap her!

Then the most petty and awful thought crosses my mind. Elliot Grey hasn't seen Ana yet. One look at her and he'll probably join the queue of admirers. Fuck! I usually never feel insecure about my looks and I have never felt in competition with Ana but there is something about her that makes men either want to take care of her or fuck her into submission. Usually both!

The differences between us are like night and day. From our looks to our personalities. So I guess I will never come across to the world as vulnerable, not like Ana. Guys seem to be intimidated by women like me. And no man will ever feel the need to take care of me because I am so strong and independent. _Yeah, right!_ And where Ana has this incredible inner strength and moral core, I am an emotional marshmallow with questionable ethics. It is a wonder that we are friends.

"Kate he's—" _Oh, here comes the self deprecation thing again. Leaping all over that before it gets started! _

"Ana! For heaven's sake— how many times do I have to tell you? You're a total babe," If I continue with this line I might keep her off balance while I outline the thousands of reasons why men want her and women want to be her but in an unusual move for Ana, she interrupts me.

"Kate, please. I need to study." I'm so fucking disappointed in her. This is classic Ana strategy. Avoidance through diligence. Once she shuts down there will be no getting any more information out of her. She really is that strong-willed. I wonder if I can sidetrack her, instead.

"Do you want to see the article? It's finished. José took some great pictures." She really doesn't look like she does. In fact, it seems that Ana would rather stick pins under her fingernails but as ever, her selflessness surprises me. She has agreed to look for my benefit not hers.

"Sure." She plasters a fake smile on her face as she approaches the lap top. _Sure you do, Steele. _I turn the screen toward her and she studies it for a while trying to make me believe that she is reading the words. Her eyes haven't left his image. I could have written the Desiderata for all she knows. Damn Jose for being such a good photographer, damn Christian Grey for being so fucking perfect and damn Ana Steele for not being honest with herself or me.

I study her face, searching for anything that will allow me to engage her again but the shutters have come down. As I look over the photograph once more I feel the visceral effects of the Christian Grey factor and I don't even like the fucker. Poor Ana. After gazing at him for the longest time she finally excuses herself to go and study. More excuses in a sea of deception. _You've got it bad, Ms Steele._

Later that evening I sit up in bed and open the lap top once more to check my story. Or at least that is what I tell myself. Instead, I find myself doing a google search for images of Elliot Grey. In almost every photo he has a different woman on his arm at some social function. Some of them I recognise, including a couple of girls were two or three years behind me at school. _Shit! Do the sums, Grey, fucking cradle snatcher!_

In disgust I log in to my blog and notice that there are an extraordinary number of hits in one day. In fact, thinking about it, in the last few hours. I trawl through the stats trying to find out what the sudden interest is. I mean, I am very proud of the work that I do here but I don't kid myself that my writing skill is elevating my cause. It took me a long time to learn how to find a balance between my causes and the kind of humor that would draw a readership. Suddenly today the figures have gone through the roof.

When I check the new comments and likes I feel my world tilt on its axis. He has signed in, as himself and he has read every post for the past three months leaving his mark on each one. Liking every single one. I write about the environment, about politics, about WSU research. I write about relationships and business ethics and the state of education in this country. How can he like and agree with each one? But there it is, his comments, his thoughts. Sometimes one word, sometimes a fully formed argument designed to support my ideas or challenge them. It takes me over an hour to read through all of them. Maybe this is someone pretending to be him but within each comment I hear his voice, his tone, his turn of phrase.

_Fuck! What the hell are you up to, Mr Grey!_

I find myself responding to some of his comments. I can't help it. He is so freaking smart and insightful. Within moments he has answered back, as if he is waiting for me. We stay on topic going back and forth on the blog before moving to chat for the next couple of hours. The challenging and debating is the best time I have had for a long time. Crap! I don't want to like this man. Finally, I plead fatigue and go to sign off but I can't resist one more question.

_What do you want?_

_To know you better_

_Why?_

_Because you are her friend._

* * *

_**Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.**_

_**These characters and the canon storyline belongs to EL James. The character motivations and alternative plotlines are from my imagination and are shaped by the wonderful reviewers and Betas who challenge and assist me in so many ways. **_

_**Song Lyrics are the property of the original writers and artists. Please visit my blog **_

_**Please review _ Your Thought, Questions and Encouragement mean a great deal. Sasha x**_


	6. Chapter 6

******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**Thanks for the reviews. As a fanfic virgin it nice to feel the encouragement.**

_**Oh yeah they tell me I'm a bad boy **_

_**All the ladies look at me and act coy **_

_**I just like to put my hands up in the air **_

_** I want that girl dancing over there **_

_**Look at her go on the dance floor **_

_**She's amazing on the dance floor **_

_**When she moves, girl, I want more **_

_** Keep it going, girl, like I got an encore **_

**_You got me sayin' __ Go little bad girl, little bad girl_ **

_**-Little Bad Girl - Taio Cruz/David Guetta- **_

* * *

The final exams are over, the final edition of the newspaper has gone to print and Ana and I head to the bar with friends for a celebration. It has been a hell of a week with neither of us getting much sleep. We could say it was down to study but I can't help but feel that it has more to do with the Grey men. After our last exam today we had gone home to rest up and change for the evening to find a package had arrived for Ana. It turned out to be a set of first edition prints of Tess of the D'Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy. Ana is a little taken aback by the gift but I can tell she is charmed. I, on the other hand, would rather not see Tess again since our final exam was almost solely dedicated to her. On those grounds alone I take the view that Christian Grey is a vindictive bastard who needs to be strung up by his balls. Ana is a little more circumspect but she announces that she is going to return the books after I discover with a little internet research that they could be worth as much as $14,000.

Jose and Travis join us at the bar. I have a small gathering of fellow newspaper students including Levi who I have warned not to say anything to Ana. Of course I had to bribe him heavily with a photo journal tribute to the varsity soccer team, his favorite sport, but it seems a small price to pay to keep this secret from Ana and Jose. I had planned to get them both relaxed with Margaritas so that they might let down their guard and fall for each other. Not the most original or romantic way of hooking up but right now it seems the best way to move them forward so that Christian Grey can be forgotten. Of course I didn't count on him sending that gift this afternoon just when Ana seemed to be returning to normal.

Ana is telling Jose about our move to Seattle and I can tell he is a bit miffed about the fact that my parents have given me a condo. _Yeah well, that sort of shit happens in my world Gonzales. Get over it._ He is more concerned that we won't be back for his show than he is about her being 165 miles away.

_Damn, Gonzales, you will never win the girl if you don't put more effort in._ Then he offers her another Margarita and I think things are looking up. She is pretty gone now and one more will certainly help his cause. Having never seen Ana drunk, it is a surprise to all of us to see her so relaxed and effusive but she has the good sense to refuse another drink. For the moment. Me, I am too far gone to know better but I am one of those people who appear sober right up until the moment they go comatose. Upright and cohesive one moment - flat on my back and incoherent the next.

"More drink, Ana!" I yell out. She is such a lightweight that I don't think she will keep drinking. She disappears into the crowd. I decide I will give her twenty minutes to negotiate the bathroom line and then go and find her. Or better yet send Jose.

"Jose!" I call him over. He refills his glass and climbs over the assorted legs to get to my side. His smile is electric and it is great to see. "Having a good time Gonzales?" I ask. He nods his head as he continues to bop to the music. Some old 90's drinking song is playing which seems infinitely appropriate. We both grin at each other. "Do you know my friend Levi?" I lean over and yell into his ear. He nods again.

"Yeah, we did a photography class together a couple of years back. Good to see you man." Jose leans over to shake Levi's hand.

"You too, man. Great job on the Grey article." Levi is such a good-natured drunk and I am eternally grateful that he can be this happy, this gone and not divulge all of my worst secrets. "Yeah, I was pretty pissed to have dropped the ball on that one but all kudos to you, man."

"Yeah, it was a bit of a no brainer. It is difficult to make the truly beautiful people look like crap." Jose says then he blushes as he looks at me. "Of course I was tempted to have a go at him in Photoshop but Kate wouldn't give me that opportunity." We all laugh but I know it is bittersweet when alluding to the Grey factor, or the Kavanagh factor for that matter.

"Oh brother I hear you. I would rather photograph sports anyway." And suddenly they are off, talking soccer, baseball, football. I am out of my depth here. I am more a politics, economics and save the environment kind of chick. Sports leave me cold which is kind of ironic given my own history. It's not the activity per se but the endless male banter and one-up-manship of the fans that I don't get. I spy Ana waiting at the bar and she looks agitated. Finally she gets served and heads back to our table. She doesn't look good.

"Hey sweetie, you need some fresh air?" I ask concerned. She nods and turns to head outside looking a bit green. I immediately go and throw myself into Levi's lap to put a halt to the conversation. This is Jose's big chance and I need to get him out there to be with Ana, asap. He doesn't look too with it himself but that might just keep him loose enough to take advantage of the moment.

"Whoa, babe." Levi laughs with me as we fall back. I take a sip of his drink then lean forward to Jose who is smiling at us.

"Jose, go and see what's up with Ana." He looks around a bit bewildered and fuzzy. _Shit he has had too much to drink as well._ "She may need you." I give him a big conspiratorial wink. It takes a moment and then I see it register on his face. _Ana - alone - outside - slightly drunk._ He stumbles to his feet and heads out the front door. I am lying back in Levi's lap congratulating myself when I feel the atmosphere in the room change. Suddenly Elliot is here in front of me and he doesn't look happy.

"Mr Grey, are you stalking me?" I smile up at him.

He pauses for a moment and then murmurs something under his breath that sounds like _"no that would be my brother."_ Then he reaches over to grab my hand. "I need to talk to you Katie."

Levi is such a good buddy and he lets me go immediately. Not that there is ever a thing between us but it would be nice to know that he would defend me if I needed. Instead he relinquishes me to this stranger. Well a stranger to him anyway. Elliot takes a tight hold of my hand and pulls me upright. I teeter on my high heels, _mmm just a little more drunk than I thought_, and he puts his arm around my waist to steady me. We are locked against each other in front of all of my friends and I can feel that he is aroused. So am I and the breath leaves my body for a moment.

"Come on baby, let's get you some water." Leaving his arm around me he guides me up to the bar. Of course he doesn't have to wait to be served. He is so tall and commanding that the barmaid jumps to get his order with a simpering giggle. I want to reach over and punch her.

"Steady baby." He hands the glass of water to me. "Now drink that straight down." And I find myself doing his bidding too until someone behind me knocks my elbow and the glass jumps out of my mouth, water pouring down the front of my top.

"Fantastic, the wet t-shirt look, very appropriate Kavanagh." I say to myself as I try to wipe the front of my top. Meanwhile Elliot has grabbed the guy by the shoulder.

"Apologise to the lady." He says in a low and threatening voice.

"Fuck off, man. Everyone knows that Kate Kavanagh is no lady." I blanch. Shit of all the morons to run into in the bar it has to be Wayne Dalgetty. He is such an ass-hole and I know this is going to go nowhere.

"Elliot it's okay. It was an accident." I try to push them apart but they are both holding their ground. Dalgetty stares into Elliot's eyes for a moment, obviously sees something that looks like more of a threat than a warning and then backs away, hands in the air.

"Sorry Kate. Tell your guard dog to back down." Wayne doesn't take his eyes off Elliot.

"Sure thing Wayne. No harm, no foul." I turn Elliot bodily away from the bar. "Come dance with me." I plead with him by pushing my body into his. I feel it again. The instant electricity and arousal. _Shit, this guy is going to have me in bed without even kissing me!_

Elliot looks down at me with anger still in his eyes. _What is it with this guy?_ That was not his fight and he doesn't need to know about my history. If he knew he would not want to defend me, that's for sure. I don't own a range of pink pjs for nothing. My life is full of endless fall out from bad choices in bars and clubs. Elliot Grey will probably be added to that list and I am feeling a little resigned to that as he smiles and wraps his arms around me.

The music has changed to something a little more up to date. A David Guetta track with a strong beat and stronger lyrics. Time to turn on the charm Kavanagh. I move in closer straddling his thigh and start my usual bump and grind. Arms up and flicking my head around I know it won't be long before he wraps his arms around me and mirrors my moves. It will be a quick two step to bed, my place, easy. Then I can get Elliot Grey out of my system over chocolate ice-cream. _Shit, I just lost the last lot of aftermath weight._

"What are you doing here?" I lean into his ear to shout over the music. He leans back with his hands on my waist and looks into my eyes.

"I came for you baby." _Yeah, keep up with the baby and you know where this is going._ What the hell, he is hot and I have been horny for him all week. He knows he has this sewn up and now it is just a matter of time. I settle back into the beat when I suddenly spy Ana walking into the bar with Christian Grey. I am not surprised. Realization hits me. This was never about me, this was about Ana, and Christian has enlisted Elliot for aide. Okay, so I am a little disappointed for myself, and worried for her. Elliot Grey I can handle - there have been a few Elliot's in my life but Ana is so innocent and Christian has the potential to destroy her.

"So the Grey boys are slumming it tonight. What is going on with your brother and my roommate?" I ask. Elliot pulls me in close placing his face against mine as we both look over to them. Christian is angry and tense but then he sees Elliot and nods. I feel Elliot smile as he rubs his hands up and down my back. I want to enjoy this but I feel sick and used. This is about keeping me out of the way.

"Christian is going to take care of Ana, okay?" He is looking in my eyes again. I still for a moment then nod placing my hands around his neck and leaning in closer. To anyone else it looks like dancing sex but then I turn my mouth to his ear.

"Okay, but if he hurts her in any way I am going to cut your balls off with a blunt kitchen knife and send them to your brother by courier mail. Capiche?" I place my hands in his hair and run them slowly down his face, chest and then run them over his stomach and the waistband of his jeans. I feel his body tremble with laughter.

"Oh, Katie, is that a promise sweetheart?" He leans in and kisses me, at first gently and then deepening with his tongue. I respond tangling my tongue with his and I know I am going to lose the battle with this Grey very quickly and painfully. I pull away, placing my forehead against his and breath deeply. "Damn, Katie. What are you doing to me?" He breaths.

We both continue to dance but don't move our heads away from each other. It is all sensation and way too much. I can feel the arousal so strong now and I know that one touch would tip me over the edge. He is hard against my thigh and it gives me a thrill to know that I am affecting him the same way that he is affecting me. Next thing I know Ana and Christian are next to us dancing. Ana never dances but damn they are pulling some moves that rival Elliot and I. Could this be the night that Ana finally brings someone home. And what a someone! Christian leans over to talk to Elliot. Elliot pulls me around so that my back is pressed against his front. I suspect that he wants to hide his erection from Christian and Ana. He places his lips next to my ear.

"Ana is going with Christian. Don't worry, he will take good care of her. You are not going to stop them no matter how much you may want to. Now just smile as if you are having a good time and wave to your friend." I am so stunned by this that I do exactly what he says. _Shit, what is going on here?_ Are the Grey's as dangerous as they seem? A look seems to pass between the brothers. A warning from Elliot. Shit. What if he is some kind of pervert or into bondage? Ana will never recover from that. I want to go after her but Elliot pulls me back. "Katie, leave them. She will be fine. You can trust him." _Yeah but can I trust you?_

His arms are like a vice around me and I am torn between a great sense of security and feeling trapped. I rub my hands over his and feel the callouses on his hands. He said he was in construction and he means it. These are hands that have done a fair share of laboring. His forearms are huge and tanned with soft blonde hair. I lean back into him and feel his erection again. If he is not going to let me go then I will just have to go with it. However, once Christian and Ana move through the door he lets me go abruptly and moves past me grabbing my hand. _Fuck, what the hell? Talk about mood swing!_

"What? What are you doing?" I yell. He moves to the table where my friends are and grabs my bag and jacket. Wrapping my jacket around my shoulders he pulls me through the bar and out the door. As we approach the door I see Wayne and his neanderthal mates standing in a huddle to one side of the door. Wayne says something and they all turn to look at me and laugh. He raises his drink to me and it is all I can do not to spit on him. Sanctimonious prick. But I realize that the assumption he is making is the one I had made about ten minutes ago when Elliot first touched me. It pisses me off that everyone will be thinking the same thing. Kate Kavanagh has just helped the newbie surfer boy score. Nothing like being a sure thing.

Once we are outside Elliot wraps an arm around me and starts to walk purposefully down the road. I am resisting slightly with my body. Surely he could buy a girl a drink before he takes me to bed. "Slow down cowboy. Where are we going?"

"Sweetheart, I am taking you home." _What no dinner first?_

"Why are you hungry?" _Shit did I say that out loud?_ He looks concerned. I shake my head.

"Meaningless sex it is." I mutter as I struggle to keep up. He looks a little pissed at that comment but he keeps walking without acknowledging me.

"Are you going to tell me about that prick in the bar?" There is venom in his voice which is kind of hot but not something I can afford to acknowledge. Too many wounds.

"Nothing to tell and none of your business if there was." I spit back. He glances at me quickly then keeps tugging me through the car park to the street beyond. The last thing I want to do is discuss Wayne Dalgetty. Nothing would be more sure to kill my libido which is climbing rampantly with every touch of Elliot's hands.


	7. Chapter 7

**__****This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**_Now I want someone badly _**

**_Got a girl here tonight _**

**_Want someone new, someone new _**

**_But a little cry wants someone badly _**

**_Wanna know if this is a bad lease on me _**  
**_I want to know _**

**_Am I sure that I heard you right I want to know _**

**_If you're leaving just do it tonight_**

**_-I Want Someone Badly - Jeff Buckley-  
_**

* * *

Stopping abruptly in the middle of the street I punch at his shoulder to turn his body to face me. He looks at me sternly but I am working up a head of steam here. "What is going on? What does your brother want with Ana?"

"I can't answer that, Kate." And I can hear the anger in his voice. His hand wraps around mine like a vice and we continue to walk.

"Well if you aren't going to answer my questions then I am going back inside to join my friends." I wrench my hand out of his and turn back toward the bar.

He grabs my hand harshly to stop me. "You don't answer my questions either, angel. And you're night is over." We continue to weave between the parked cars and I am struggling to keep up in my Manolos while trying to pull back on his hand to slow him down. Not letting my hand go he suddenly sweeps me up in his arms and throws me over his shoulder. My squeal is drowned by his laughter and he gently swats my backside with his hand. Now I am pissed and I smack his hands away.

"Back off you oaf. Put me down." I snarl. What the hell does he think he is doing? First he takes over my night, then he instructs me on how to behave as my roommate is abducted by his creepy overbearing brother, then he ends my night abruptly without explanation. He stalks down the road at pace. My mood is thundering, "What the fuck do you think you're doing? I am not ready to go home."

"Oh yes you are angel." He doesn't pause for a moment. "I am going to take you home and you are going to sleep off this alcohol. Then in the morning you will calmly wait for my brother to return your roommate to you and you will see that he is not a bad guy."

"I am not drunk, and I don't need you to tell me what I am going to do. I know they are at the Heathman and the moment you drop me off I will take myself down there and rescue her. He is a control freak and a nutcase and he is right now taking advantage of a very drunk and innocent girl." I shout at him. My body is shaking with rage. How dare he do this? He is just like his brother and possibly worse since he is like a wolf in sheep's clothing. That sweet carefree face hides the mind of a complete tyrant. My apartment is walking distance to the bar so it doesn't take long before we arrive out the front. I am wondering how he knew this without asking me. He swings me down and carefully places me on the pavement.

"Goodnight Katie. Thanks for the dance." He smiles down at me.

"Oh no you don't. You get your arse inside that apartment. We are going to talk." He looks like he is going to argue then a light comes on at the neighbors place and he seems to think better of it. Running a hand through his hair he sighs and then turns towards my front door. _Smart move, Grey._

I open the door with my key and let us in, switching on lights and dumping my bag and jacket as I go. I stalk straight to the kitchen and put the kettle on. "You want tea, coffee?"

He walks in after me, taking up all the space in the room. "Tea is fine, thanks. Cups?" I point him at the cupboard and he starts to help himself. We move around the kitchen in synchronous motion. It is like he lives here. I throw tea bags into the cups, he pours milk. We both pass on sugar. Cups in hand we move out to the dining table and sit.

"Now spill Grey. What is going on?" I ask. He blows on his tea and then takes a big sip. I eyeball him over my cup.

"Look, I don't know. Christian never dates and he certainly never tells me anything about his love life. Then this week he calls me and invites me up to Portland. We are meant to go hiking but then he is working all day, or so he says. Next thing I know he is eliciting my help to rescue Ana tonight." He hasn't looked at me through this whole speech.

_Shit._ "So this behavior is out of character. What made him think she needed saving?" I ask. It seems that Christian Grey's stalking abilities know no bounds but tonight has been just a little too surreal for my liking. It occurs to me what Elliot meant when he first spoke in the bar tonight. Christian's stalking behavior concerns him too.

"She called him. Drunk-dialled him." I look at him in surprise and he nods. "I don't know what she said but he had us on the road so quick my head was spinning. Then he asked me to go into the bar and take care of you. Keep you out of the way and make sure you got home." He looks guilty now and I almost feel sorry for him. Almost.

"So you do anything your brother asks you?" Now that I realize he was never going to sleep with me I am more than a little hurt. All this attraction was one sided, it was never about him and me and I feel a little foolish. He has only done a favor for his brother and here I was planning a night between the sheets. _How stupid can you get Kate?_

"Look, Katie, I would have come if you had asked me to." This shocks me into looking at him. "Like I said, Christian never tells me anything about his love life and the fact that he would even vaguely want my help was...too hard to resist." He would have come over if I had asked? _I'm asking now. I am practically yelling. Sleep with me!_

"But what does he want with her? Ana is such a nice person, and innocent. He looks like he wants to tie her up to his bed, for Godsake. She is going to get so hurt by this," I cry. I'm so caught up in my own thinking that I almost missed the shocked look on his face. _What? What did I say?_

"Shit. I don't know what he wants. He doesn't do relationships, not the hearts and flowers kind anyway. And how do I know that Ana doesn't just want him for his money? What makes you think he won't get hurt by any of this?" He looks at me and I see the moment when he registers my anger.

"Ana, is not a gold digger," I spit out. Every bone in my body wants to reach over and slap him right now.

"How do you know that? She's been living off you for four years. She will continue to sponge off you in Seattle won't she? Isn't that the plan?" _WTF?_

"How do you know that?" My voice is little more than a whisper. Ana lives here, she pays rent, utilities and food but even she doesn't know that it isn't enough to cover all of our expenses. That has never bothered me, I have enough money to cover everything for both of us but she would never accept my charity. Hell, my Dad doesn't even know how much Ana pays to live here.

He sits back in his chair and smacks his hands down on his thighs, saying nothing. He looks so guilty.

"How do you know that?" I ask again. This time he leans on the table with his elbows and rubs his hands over his face and through his hair. There is tension in his body but it is nothing compared to the tension in the air between us right now. That you could cut with a knife.

"Christian has a file on her." My mouth is hanging open. "It is not what you think. He is a very rich and powerful man. He needs to be careful about who he associates with." _Even you can't justify this crap, Elliot Grey._

I stand up, shaking. "He does due diligence on his potential girlfriends? Jesus, what kind of pervert does that?" My voice is raising in both pitch and volume and I know that the neighbors can probably hear me but I don't care. I have never been more angry.

"Kate, I imagine this is upsetting but it is not unusual. How many people has your father investigated over the years? Do you think that if he ever got wind of us that he wouldn't have a file on me?" He has reached out and grabbed my hands. I pull away from him, shaking him off.

"There is no 'us'. And what the hell has my father got to do with this?" I yell at him. I am furious with him right now and I can see that this outburst is making him nervous. He knows something and he is keeping it from me. My breath is coming hard and I stare him down. Then I realize he is protecting his brother. And wouldn't I do anything for my brother? For my family? For Ana? Now I am sure that Christian Grey has a big secret and his brother is here to protect his interests. And in that moment I realize that I am collateral damage. Since I never expect these things to go any other way I don't know why this thought depresses me so much. Keeping my eyes clearly focused on his I repeat, "There is no us."

He leans back in the chair again, shaking his head. He has a small smile on his face. "You don't mean that Katie. You felt it as strong as I did. There is something here and you can't deny it. I have never felt like this before about anyone and neither have you."

My eyes widen. "Don't try to tell me what I feel." I turn away from the table hoping that now if I break our eye contact I will be able to hold on to my anger. He has just accused my best friend of being a gold digger, he has defended his brother's stalker tendencies, he is keeping some mammoth secret that might just cause Ana immeasurable pain and he has accused my father of investigating my lovers. What more could he say to insult me and yet I still want him, with every fiber of my being, I want to wrap myself up in his body and lose myself. I feel him move behind me and his hands slide onto my waist. He is being careful with me and he needs to be.

"Sweetheart, we can make this about them or we can make this about us. Right now I know what I want." I turn around to face him and angry tears are threatening to stream down my face. The anger is not enough to make me cry but the alcohol is. Normally I would never cry in front of anyone except Ana and my mother but I want him to see this. I want him to feel bad enough to tell me everything he is keeping from me about his brother. Manipulative, yes, but I know how this game is played. When I look into his eyes, he looks genuinely dismayed and he places his hands on my face gently kissing away my tears. _I don't understand this, I am Katherine Kavanagh. I use guys without thought. I am strong, beautiful, intelligent, rich and no blue collar workman should be making me feel this way._ Only that is not who he is, is it?

This is frightening me for the first time. I am used to temporary disappointments where I eat my emotions and then purge with more meaningless sex as I try to roll with the punches. Men like to think they can conquer me and move on quickly. I am used to things being light and impermanent. I use them as much as they use me. What I see in his eyes looks like much more than the desire for a meaningless fuck. It looks genuine and heartfelt. Not to be trusted and much more dangerous than anything I have ever encountered before.

"You are going to hurt me," I whisper, my body trembling. Shaking his head he kisses my eyes but I continue, "I don't want you to hurt me."

"Listen, baby, I am not my brother. I don't want to hurt you. I don't know what this is but perhaps we can just go slowly and find out." My resolve breaks and I start to sob. He pulls me into his chest and wraps his arms around me, stroking ,my back and kissing my hair. No one ever gets to see me this vulnerable and this man has me at my worst. I feel like I am handing him a weapon. One that he could destroy me with. He moves us to the couch and I am in his lap crying uncontrollably. I know that this is mostly the alcohol and the stress of the last few weeks. It is the worry about my best friend but mostly it is because he is holding me so gently. No man in my life has ever held me and let me cry. I was trained to be strong, to show no fear, to be confident. This is not who I am and it frightens me beyond belief.

We sit like this for almost half an hour and finally my crying stops. He stands, lifting me straight up into his arms as if I weigh nothing more than a few pounds. "Which way, princess?" I point him towards my room. I am wondering what is going to happen. I want him to stay. God, I wanted hot messy no holds barred sex with him a few hours ago. Now I feel shy and insecure. He backs into my bedroom and swings me gently down to my feet. Looking around he spies, _oh no,_ my pink pjs are freshly laundered and folded on my bed. _Not the pjs._ He smiles and picks them up. "OK, baby, let's get you changed."

Suddenly I am a child. He pulls the pins out of my hair and gently brushes it down with his hands. Instinctively I reach up to touch his chest but he calmly grabs my hands and places them up in the air. He pulls my tank top off me. I am not wearing a bra and I wait for him to touch my breasts. I long for him to touch my breasts. With a wistful look he runs a finger down the center of my chest then he turns to the pajamas and picks up the top. _Oh no._

"Arms up." I do as he asks with a petulant look and he laughs. He is laughing at me and I feel mortified. He slides the pink flannel top down my arms and over my body. He then sits on my bed and reaches up to pull me toward him by the waist of my jeans. He runs his hands down my legs and I tremble with desire. I want him to touch me there but he continues down to my ankles, picks up one foot and removes my high heel. Then he removes the other one and places them carefully under the bed. Returning his hands to behind my knees he slides them up over my bum and I feel myself thrusting towards his face. He kisses my stomach as he undoes my jeans then slides them down. I step out of my jeans and he throws them over to the chair.

"I really want to make love to you angel but I am not going to take advantage of you. I am going to take your panties off now but I want you to know that it is going to take all my control not to touch you." I nod, disappointed. He does as he says then reaches for my pj bottoms and helps me to step into them, pulling them up to my waist. He plants another gentle kiss on my stomach. I want him so much it hurts.

"You wouldn't be taking advantage," I whisper, "I want you too." He smiles and then turns me around.

"Be a good girl and go and do your teeth." He pats me on the bottom and pushes me towards the door. I go into the bathroom to brush my teeth and he follows me a moment later. Looking at me in the mirror he reaches past me to my make-up wipes and removes one from the pack. I finish my teeth and he turns me around, picks me up and places me on the bathroom vanity.

"Close your eyes." He whispers. I do and he very gently starts to wipe my make up off cupping my chin with his other hand. When he is finished he places the wipe into the rubbish bin then starts to kiss my face, my eyes, my forehead, my nose, my cheeks then he runs a lazy tongue down my jaw. I am aching with need. No one has ever been this sensual, this gentle with me. I am at a loss in this sensation.

He lifts me down and takes my hand leading me back to my room. The covers have been pulled back and he indicates for me to get in. He covers me then sits on the side of the bed stroking my hair. I look up at him, confused. "I don't understand this. Why don't you want me? I want you."

He sighs and closes his eyes for a brief moment. "Katie, I want you more than I want air right now but you have to decide what you want. If we do this, there will be no one else. There will be no drunken nights flirting with guys in bars and leading them on. It may not last but it will be intense and emotional and we may both get burned. We have to go into this with our eyes open and I am not going to take you there until I am sure you are making this decision for the right reasons." I don't know what to think about this._ Is this man for real? Nobody starts a relationship like this, do they? There is no such thing as love at first sight. Is that what he is saying? That he is in love with me? I have laughed and kicked guys to the curb for presuming less than this. What makes him so special?_

"I better go." He looks sad and goes to stand up. I grab his hand instinctively.

"I don't want you to go." He looks hopeful for a moment then shakes his head. "No, I am not saying I want forever. But I don't want to be alone right now. Can you please stay? At least until I go to sleep?" My inner child is back again and I think I must sound as petulant and spoiled as I feel. He walks out the door and I feel like I want to die of embarrassment and what? loss? The tears are threatening again but in a few minutes he is back. He has a glass of water in his hand and some Advil that he places on my bedside table. He walks around the bed and starts to remove his jacket, his shoes and socks, his belt, keys, phone and wallet. Without lifting the duvet he lies on my bed and wraps his arm around me.

"Thank you." I whisper.

"Goodnight, angel."


	8. Chapter 8

******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**Thanks for the reviews. I really wanted Elliot to have more depth and for this relationship with Kate to be different for him. Hope you are enjoying it.**

_**A little bit of me and a whole lot of you **_

_**Add a dash of starlight and a dozen roses, too **_

_**Then let it rise for a hundred years or two **_

_**And that's the recipe for making love**_

_**It doesn't need sugar 'cause it's already sweet **_

_**It doesn't need an oven 'cause it's got a lot of heat **_

_**Just add a dash of kisses to make it all complete **_

_**And that's the recipe for making love**_

_**- Recipe for Love - Harry Connick Jr-  
**_

* * *

The next morning I wake up and stretch. My head is feeling a lot better than it should and as I recall the events of the previous evening I roll over to see if he is still here. Disappointment floods through me as I take in the empty bed and his clothes gone. _Shit. What happened?_ How did I lose control of that particular situation? Guys fall over themselves to take me to bed and generally I let them. Well, no, technically there have only been a few actual lovers and a number of hot and heavies who almost but didn't quite make it but I have always known that they all want to. How come a renowned hornbag like Elliot Grey was able to resist my charms? Especially as he is professing undying love for me. _Didn't he?_ I groan, roll over and reach for the pills and water he left by the bed. At least he is considerate. Then I hear a noise out in the living room, the front door opening. _Shit Ana._

I am up and out of bed as quick as flash. I don't want to miss out on the dirt from her evening but when I walk out into the living room it is Elliot letting himself in. I stop and lean on the door frame watching him, trying to catch my breath. He is here, with me. Maybe...

"Hey, baby. I got coffee. I wasn't sure how you like it so I got espresso and cappuccino. Which do you want?" His smile is contagious. I unfold my arms and shake my head pushing away from the wall and heading toward him. He places the coffee holder down on the table and wraps his arm around me, placing a kiss on my mouth. "You look gorgeous this morning."

_What? No make up, bed hair, pink flannel and a hangover. Is this guy for real?_ "Flattery will get you everywhere." I smile up at him. I turn to the table and grab the espresso then head to kitchen put two sugars in and go back out to the couch, flopping myself down. "I feel like crap but thanks for lying."

"Oh sweetheart, would I lie to you?" He laughs, grabs his coffee and walks over to join me. "So is this how you like your coffee normally?"

"Oh yeah, sweet, strong and black. Like my..." I say with a smirk. He glances sideways at me.

Two out of three ain't bad?" Now he is grinning a full blown Elliot Grey surfer boy grin at me and I want him so bad. Without a change of expression he reaches over and grabs my chin leaning in for a kiss. I know my mouth must taste like the bottom of a bird cage but I can't resist him. Our tongues sweep past each other and things start to heat up. He pauses, "Drink your coffee before someone gets hurt."

His phone vibrates in his pocket and he stretches out his leg to retrieve it without standing up. Glancing at it quickly he presses a few buttons. "Ana is fine, she is with Christian at the Heathman. He wanted you to know."

"So what did you text back?" I ask curiously.

"That I am here with you and I am OK too." I laugh. So Christian and I are the predators here. _I don't think so Elliot Grey. You have had your fair share._ "I asked him if he got laid."

"Elliot! What did he say?" I don't know whether to be shocked or laugh. This is virginal Ana we are talking about, the girl who hasn't had a boyfriend in the past four years. Unlike me, I have never known her to have a one night stand either. I want to be angry at Elliot but he looks so playful, I channel my inner revenge demon at his brother instead.

"He doesn't kiss and tell." He puts the phone down on the table and takes another sip of his coffee before turning to look at me. "Tell me about Ana." He seems genuinely interested but I am wary. This seemingly innocent question is the start of an interrogation. I recognize the tactic well but I am less sure about the motive behind it. Is this about getting to know my best friend or protecting Christian?

Start with the truth. "She is a wonderful person who deserves to find love. She is incredibly loyal, private, funny, intelligent. She also has an incredible humility. She has no idea how truly attractive she is and how many guys want to be with her."

"Is she gay?" I almost choke on my coffee. Isn't that the same question that I got Ana to ask about Christian? _Shit._ "No, she is not gay. She just never found the right guy."

"I like to tease Christian about being gay. I know he isn't but he is so easy to bait." Right at that moment I feel a degree of sympathy for Christian Grey. "So what about you and guys. Is there anyone special that I am going to have to deal with? All those guys at the bar for instance?"

I smile. I might throw myself at guys but I don't sleep with _**all**_ of them. Unfortunately, that is not the way they like to tell it to their friends. "I am what would be classified as the eternal tease. Guys want me, I know they want me and I play on it. They don't get far though, so no, there is no one special. At the moment." I add this last comment in a low whisper just to get a reaction. It works. Placing his cup down he turns to face me, takes my cup out of my hand and places it on the coffee table.

"You are going to make me work for this aren't you Katie? Like I said last night. All you have to do is say what you want when you are clear headed and it will be easy. I will be here heart and soul." He is looking at me so earnestly and I want so much to believe him. I look away, a tear threatening in my eye. Relationships don't work this way. Part of me wishes he would stop.

Elliot stands up and gathers the empty coffee cups heading for the kitchen. I hear him rummaging around in the fridge and I am at a loss as to what I could possibly offer him for breakfast. A guy like him must require a lot of feeding. I stand up and head to the kitchen door. He is humming to himself and pulling eggs, bacon, bread, tomatoes, avocado and mushrooms from the fridge placing them on the bench. He quickly works out where the pan is which is better than I could do. I don't cook and suddenly I am filled with a fear that he wants me to do this for him. _Shit._

"Umm... we could just go out for breakfast. My treat." I offer hopefully. He smiles at me indulgently.

"Why would we do that when your fridge is so well stocked? Unless you are saving this to cook a sumptuous dinner for some other guy?" He tilts his head to one side and looks at me speculatively.

"Ah no. It's just..." Shaking my head I look at my feet. I feel so stupid and inadequate. This is one of those areas of my skills that is truly underdeveloped. Ana tries to teach me to cook but I am hopeless at it. If it wasn't for her we would starve, or eat out every night. She would never allow that. Luckily she is a great cook and I am a great shopper. It makes life easier. But with Elliot here I am suddenly aware of my shortcomings and more than a little embarrassed that I can't do this simple thing for him. He seems to read the look on my face.

"Hey, Katie." He puts down the knife he is wielding and walks over to me. "I can cook us breakfast. In fact I am a great cook." He reaches into his pocket and takes out his phone. "Here you can call my brother and ask." His look is cheeky and hopeful. I can't help but laugh. "That's better... now come here."

Pulling me in front of him he traps me between his body and the kitchen bench. He places the knife in my hand then holds his hands over mine as we slice the tomatoes. There is something very sensual about it. The movements are slow and careful as we prepare the vegetables. Keeping hold of my hand he leads me to the fresh herbs that are growing on the windowsill. I don't even know what most of them are. Plucking a few leaves he holds them up to my face. I inhale.

"Mmm...basil, oregano...you have quite a garden here Miss Kavanagh. Fresh and beautiful, like you." And so help me I blush uncontrollably. Dragging the herbs down my face he follows with a trail of gentle licks as if he is tasting where the fragrant leaves have been. I lean my head back to give him better access. This man has me at a complete loss.

Then he leaves the kitchen and heads to the lounge. Suddenly the apartment is filled with music, the strains of La Traviata. Strolling back into the kitchen he takes up his position behind me and we begin chopping herbs together. Him controlling the movements. "Okay, can you put some vinegar into the water I have heating on the stove. Just a cupful will do." I move to do this and he splashes some oil into another pan. His movements are efficient and easy and it is a joy to watch him. Soon he has eggs poaching, bacon and vegetables sauteing. He slices some sourdough bread and puts it through the toaster.

"Can you get some plates out baby?"

I move to set places at the table while he arranges the food on plates. I pour orange juice and take my seat as he presents my breakfast with a flourish.

"Mademoiselle. Bon appetite." He gives me a gentle kiss then takes his place at the table. He lifts my hand to his mouth and kisses it and I find myself giggling like a school girl.

"You speak french and cook, sir?" I ask.

"Spanish actually. My brother and sister speak French but I had to be the rebellious one." He states and I am intrigued by this man's talents. He builds, he dances, he cooks, he speaks Spanish. What else?

"Why Spanish?" I ask.

"When we were kids we had a Spanish housekeeper. She spoke very little English and my family was very patient with her but I knew that she struggled. When my mother insisted I learn a language I decided I wanted to learn Spanish so I could help her." He is speaking in between swallowing mouthfuls of food. Yes, this man takes a lot of feeding. I am feeling pretty hungry myself and this meal is fantastic. Better than we would have got at the local IHOP. I savor each mouthful amazed at how he has created so much flavor with these few ordinary ingredients.

"This is amazing. Did your housekeeper teach you to cook?" I ask savoring another mouthful.

"Yes but also my darling baby sister, Mia. She is studying in France under a master chef. It is the thing that we have bonded over. We both love to eat and she teaches me everything she knows. Well...almost everything." I can hear in his voice how much he adores her and my heart clenches. This man is incredible. So loving, so funny.

"Tell me about Grey Construction." And at this point he absolutely blossoms. For the next half hour he tells me about his business and how his brother has helped him to build it. Christian is the economic brain of the family and he has helped them all to achieve security in their endeavors. But the building itself, that is all Elliot. He has a passion for sustainable housing and recycled materials. He has built all over the world and his company is thriving in an economic environment that is fraught. I am amazed by his passion and fervor and I could listen to him talk forever. My questions fly out of my mouth as I try to find out more and more about him and the way he thinks. His intelligence and knowledge is incredibly sexy. How can I not love this man?

_Oh my god. This cannot be happening. We have only just met, we haven't even slept together and I am already head over heels. Immediately I tamp down these feelings, they are not to be trusted._

We get onto family again and he has me laughing with stories of his childhood. It is obvious he loves his parents and siblings and that he cares deeply for the people who are close to him. I have tears in my eyes as he relates a story about fighting with Christian that resulted in a martial arts feud. He is reenacting whole sections of the fight and I am amazed at how he moves and talks, how he is so self-deprecating. He knew that Christian was going to beat the crap out of him so he resorted to sarcasm and then ran as fast as he could not daring to come out until he knew Christian was calm. He tells me that he knew Christian had anger problems as a result of a harsh early start before their parents adopted them. While it scared him he never once thought of Christian as anything but a brother he loved and would defend. Apparently there was nothing stronger than the Grey brothers when they were backed into a corner and he relates a few tales about their scrapes. I am delighted and crying with laughter by the time he finishes helping me clear up the kitchen.


	9. Chapter 9

******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**You are about to hit steamy bits!**

**Thanks for the reviews. I love living with Kate and Elliot.**

**_If you want (Oh, yeah) _**

_**Just let me know **_

_**If you got it 'cause **_

_**It's strictly physical**_

_**Don't be a fool, boy **_

_**Just 'cause we're dancing go, go **_

_**It's just an illusion leave your emotions for home**_

_**-Strictly Physical - Monrose  
**_

* * *

Surprisingly, this domestic bliss has a strange normality to it. Too good to be true and sucking me in already. Elliot has noticed that a washer needs replacing in the kitchen and he sets about fixing it while I go off to the bathroom to shower. I stand still, looking at my reflection in the mirror. This is what I want isn't it? A full blown real adult relationship with commitment. How could I possibly be feeling this with him so soon? I am terrified that I am going to be blindly drawn into this bliss, wanting desperately to believe and being hit with some awful truth that will rip it all apart. He will get bored, or the whole thing will be about keeping me preoccupied while Christian seduces Ana. There has to be an ulterior motive, because nothing could be this good, this fast. People like Elliot and me, we don't simply fall in love. We manipulate, we pose, we use so that we can't be used. I step into the flow of the shower. _I can't trust him. I won't trust him._ The realization has me shaking. Tears start flowing and suddenly he is there in the shower with me, holding me.

"Baby, don't cry. Sshhh. Please don't cry." I turn in his arms and realize that he has stripped off his shirt and shoes but is still wearing his jeans. He doesn't seem to notice or care. His gentle kisses build in passion and urgency. Lifting me up he carries me out of the shower but doesn't take his mouth from mine. My arms wrap around his broad shoulders and my legs around his waist as he grinds against me. I can feel him hard against my groin and I am aching with need as he runs his hands over my body. It feels so good as if he has a direct line to my core. I want more and he senses this need.

Placing me down on my feet and he holds my waist as he reaches for a towel and wraps me up, squeezing the water from my hair. My mind registers that he is taking care of me again as he turns off the water of the shower and then turns to attend to me. The tears have eased but I am shaking and he dries me thoroughly before handing me my tooth brush and squeezing paste on it. His face is a picture of impassivity that belies his kindness and the tears threaten once more. _What the hell is wrong with me?_

Our reflection in the mirror grabs my attention. Anyone would look at us and assume that we had a magical life. Two beautiful people who belong together. Him with his tall rugged beach boy surfer look, all blonde hair and blue eyes with a trace of stubble. Me with my tousled damp, dark blonde curls, clear skin and clear blue eyes. We should not have problems, we have youth, looks, money and the world is our oyster. But it is a painful illusion. Surely I can just enjoy some casual sex and move on with no regrets? Sure, but I am already falling hard for him and I know he will hurt me. I want to believe but I know better. I rinse my mouth and look at him in the reflection again. So beautiful, so fake.

"I want this with you Kate." He whispers in my ear, as if he can read my mind and I grit my teeth angrily.

"What exactly do you want, Elliot? You still haven't made love to me. Why?" My concern is not that I am undesirable physically to him. I felt his reaction to me in the shower and on the dance floor last night. No, my concern is that he doesn't really want to bother, it would be easier not to go through my angst. Perhaps he senses my need. If he doesn't address it then he can move on once Christian is done with Ana and we can pretend that none of this ever happened. That is why his answer both surprises me and adds to my frustration.

"We didn't have a condom in the shower. I don't want you to ever have any regrets about this, Kate." _What do you want, Elliot? Reassurance that you have done the right thing?_ His altruism is both comforting and pissing me off. Then it suddenly occurs to me. _Should I be concerned?_

"I'm clean and I am on the pill. How about you, Grey?" I ask with a hint of venom. I want him to know that I am pissed that he won't touch me.

"I'm clean and I want you to know that you can trust me Katie. Always. But right now you have no reason to so I am going to have to earn that trust." While I am perfectly willing to believe he is clean I am not sure if we have the same ideas about trust. He really looks like he means it. _Don't go there Kate. Elliot Grey is known to have slept with half of Seattle. This is just a ploy._

"Elliot, I ..." _What do I want to say? That I trust you now? I want this and I want you._ His attempt at honesty has me concerned and I am struggling to form a response. "How do you know you can trust me?" He shakes his head and steps in towards me and lifts me up onto the vanity, opening my thighs he steps in between and pulls my arms around his waist.

"Katie, you had me at the Heathman. I trust you completely. I want to tell you things you are not ready to hear. Most of all I want to make love to you. But I want... no I need to take this slow. I can't explain it very well but I don't want to mess this up." I am not as shocked as I probably should be. The hint of truth in his words has me wanting so badly to believe him but he is right I don't want to hear anything that will turn out to be a sweet lie.

"Okay, Elliot, let's just take it slow. If we start declaring undying love for each other no one is going to believe us. Least of all us. I vote we just have wild monkey sex and drive everyone nuts with how into each other we are. That they will expect." I put on a smile that I am not really feeling. This 'other' something between us still has me questioning his motives.

Smiling at me, he gives a sad, soft laugh as he places his palm on my face. "You're right. Angel. I can see that you don't want to trust this. To trust me. But I need you to know that this is different for me. I want to shout this out loud. Keeping how I feel about you a secret is going to kill me." It is like he can see inside my soul and I can see in his eyes that he believes in this moment that he means it. He is bringing me undone, breaking down my defenses. Rather than fight I lean forward and kiss him. I don't know what 'this' is. It can't be ...love, it is too soon and it is not what the Elliot Greys and Kate Kavanaghs of the world do. But he is right, this is intense and mesmerizing. _Please don't hurt me._

"Can you keep a secret?" I whisper. He nods with expectant laughter in his eyes. He wants me to confess my feelings, I can tell. "So can I." His laughter is gentle with a hint of melancholy.

"Can you really keep a secret?" he asks gently nudging my cheek with his nose. I lean back to look him in the eye and nod. "I think I love you Kate Kavanagh."

_Shit! Don't do this Elliot, don't ruin this. I don't want you to tell me you love me and then walk away unscathed when you suddenly change your mind. Because I just might love you too and if you do that to me it will hurt me so much I will want to die._ He must see the horror in my eyes and he shifts his body.

"Fuck, Kate, I..." He runs a hand through his hair as he steps away from me. _Damn, he is running already._ "I'm sorry, I don't know why I had to blurt it out like that. Not that I don't mean every word but now I know you are going to run and I don't blame you."_ Not me, you Elliot Grey, you are going to run._

I sit up straight and I reach out for his hand. "Elliot, it's okay, it was just a surprise that's all. Nobody has ever said that to me before."

"You mean so soon?" His head is down. He can't look me in the eye. _Damn!_

"I mean ever." I say sadly. Looking up there is a look of surprise on his face. "Look guys fall for the looks, the money, the connections but not for the girl. I've always known that." I am more than a little disappointed that he is now going to retract his words. I expect it but it hurts all the same.

"You deserve to be told it often." He whispers then he looks me directly in the eye. "If it's any consolation I have never said it to anyone before."

"Ever?"

"To a girlfriend? Never." He shakes his head. _Wow._ I don't quite know what to do with that information. He just said he loves me and implied that he considers me his girlfriend. My heart is going a million miles a minute, trying not to presume but I try to keep calm by dropping a gentle kiss his shoulder. He looks at me questioning, "You have me over a barrel here Miss Kavanagh."

"You want me to say it too?" I ask, a little incredulous at where he might be heading.

"No. I want you to mean it when you say it. If you say it. It's just..." He hesitates as if he is unsure how to proceed. His eyes look slightly haunted. "Look, I am not going to take it back if that is what you want. It is out there now and I mean it. I do love you and I don't expect you to feel the same way, yet. But please, give this a chance. I want to prove to you that I mean it. I want you to say it to me one day and really mean it. I can wait... just ... don't run from me, please."

Wow, this beautiful man, who I know in my head is a player, has just told me he loves me. He seems to think that he means it and I want to believe that he does, but history ... "Elliot, I am not running. Thinking yes, but not running. I want to say it and mean it too. So please, give me some time. Its just you are ...well, you. You have this reputation and this just doesn't fit my picture of who I thought you were."

"Yeah, doesn't quite live up to the hype does it?" I shake my head and he gives a little laugh. "Okay, let's just forget this happened for the moment, okay."

I don't think I will ever forget this. "Okay." And I wonder which one of us is lying the most.

Sliding down off the vanity I reach out and start to undo his pants. "You're wet. You need to get dry." I continue to undress him, sliding his wet jeans and boxers down then slinging them over the shower rail to dry. My towel is still wrapped around me and I look into his eyes. "I may not be ready to say it with words but I am more than ready to say it with this." I drop my towel and stand naked before him. His eyes run hungrily over my body and are quickly followed by his hands as he pulls me into his arms. With lingering kisses, he laves his tongue over my skin as he awakens my nerve endings. I am all sensation standing here trembling in his arms. His hands pull down in a long stroke down my sides as he sinks to his knees. He kisses my stomach and begins to touch me. I am hot and so ready. With a flick of his tongue he elicits a moan from me while his fingers play me like a piano. I thrust my pelvis into his mouth as he urges me towards an elusive edge.

Before I can tip over he rises to kiss me and I taste my salty tang on his mouth. Between kisses he murmurs, "Baby, you taste so fucking beautiful."

Lifting me up he carries me through to my bedroom. I can feel him hard against me and my clitoris is aching with need. Gently lowering me to the bed, he runs his hands up to cup my breasts then lowers his lips to my nipples, laving, licking and nipping at them. It feels so good sparking a deep need in my core. A moan sounds in my ears and I realize it is me.

Sliding down my body, he is kissing and licking as he goes. His hand moves between my legs and he inserts two fingers into me gently massaging the inner wall. His tongue flicks over my clitoris causing electric shocks then he begins to suck. I build too quickly and my orgasm hits me hard and fast with him sucking my juices. He leaves his fingers inside me as he rises and returns to kissing my mouth. I can taste myself on him and it is so erotic.

His cock is hard against my stomach and I reach down to stroke him. So thick and powerful but smooth and silky. I want him inside me so much and he seems to sense this. He shakes his head then he moves my palm over his cock until I am once again stroking the long hard length. His body is still, his head braced on his arm as he leans on the bed beside me. I kiss up his chest and neck without stopping the rhythm finally thrusting my tongue in his mouth. He moves his fingers back to my aching cleft and we kiss and stroke each other.

Once more I feel myself building as his thumb plays across my hard nub. It feels so damn good and his shaft seems to be getting harder in my hand. There is no holding back for me and I detonate once more around his fingers. Quickly I move down to take him in my mouth. He tastes so good and I lick around the head of his cock. Leaning over to the night stand he grabs a foil packet and quickly rips it open. I push him back on the bed and help him to sheath his long hard erection before straddling his hips and impaling myself on him.

"Fuck Kate, Jesus that feels good." So much profanity and it is all making me hot. I squirm on him adapting to the fullness of his large cock invading my body. It has been a while and I am tight around him. I start to move slowly at first sliding up and down his shaft. The pressure is too much and I am building incredibly fast. Then his thumb strokes me again and I tip over the edge with a long pulsing orgasm that leaves me breathless.

In a quick smooth movement he picks me up still inside him and throws me down on my back. Pushing my thighs up with his arms he thrusts hard into me, trying to get as high inside me as he can. I lift one leg over his shoulder to give him access. He is so far in I can feel the sensation in my stomach and it feel so amazing. He withdraws slowly and slams in again. I cry out with the impact.

"Shit, did I hurt you?" I shake my head.

"No, it feels amazing." I thrust back up to meet him and he begins to move again. It is hard and fast and we are both climbing with the sensation of our movement. His breath is rapid and the small grunts and slap of his balls against my skin is turning me on more than I could ever believe possible. I am reaching and reaching with every thrust and I finally find release as I pulse around him with a scream.

"Fuck Kate, baby." He cries out as he comes hard inside me then collapses down on top of my body. I bring my leg back down to a normal position. "Were you some kind of gymnast? Baby that was fucking amazing."

I smile. _Hit the nail on the head there Mr G._ "You were pretty amazing yourself." And I laugh a little with my hand covering my eyes and that brings on a whole new sensation with him still inside me.

"Damn it woman, you are going to make me hard again. Stop that." He is still breathing hard and that makes me laugh even more. Then we both still and look into each others eyes. The longing is intimate and intense and we both begin to move again. Soon he is kissing me and our pace picks up but is more controlled and gentle this time. There is a reverence in this lovemaking and we reach our pinnacle together clinging to each other 's faces as we guide each other over the edge.

"Shit, Kate. Fuck." He is breathing hard, as am I. We hold each other close as we come down.


	10. Chapter 10

**__****This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**_Later for you baby I heard my train whistle blow_**

**_Later for you baby I heard my train whistle blow_**

**_You won't be getting to miss me  
_**

**_Until my train pulls out and goes  
_**

**_- Later for you baby - Guitar Slim-  
_**

* * *

Elliot and I shower again and go out for more coffee. We walk down to the local cafe holding hands and he orders me espresso without checking. He knows what I want and how I want it. I never imagined myself in this position. He seems so completely happy and I can't believe how much has happened within twenty four hours. He reaches for my hand again as we leave the cafe and head back to my apartment and I wonder if we can go back to bed as soon as we get there. Smiling at me he asks about the paper and I start telling him about getting the final issue out. He asks an endless stream of questions about my work and I can't help but think how sexy his interest and drive for knowledge is. Hell, everything about him is sexy, I think, as he reaches over and brushes some hair out of my face.

Finally, we arrive back at the apartment and immediately fall into each others' arms without finishing our coffee. I feel totally consumed by this man.

"You are so fuckable and loveable and not necessarily in that order." I blush at his words but they turn me on and he knows it. He just blows me away. If we keep this up I am going to be sore.

Later we climb out of bed and return to the table. I nuke our abandoned coffee in the microwave which is kind of awful but he smiles through it anyway. Next thing I know the door to the apartment is opening and Ana walks in. She looks like a frightened rabbit in the headlights and I am wondering just what has gone down with her. For a moment I feel a little guilty that Elliot and I must look so totally into each other but I can't help smiling at her. My grin fades when I see Christian. He doesn't look too happy to see me either. I can't put my finger on why I don't trust Christian Grey but I am quite sure that he is no good for Ana.

I leap up to hug Ana which turns into an examination but I am genuinely concerned. My greeting to Christian is bordering on hostile and I get the sense that both Christian and Elliot want to reprimand me. It gives me a moment of pause but then I shrug it off. Christian is equally as reserved in his reply and I can sense that Elliot is not entirely happy with him either. He has a look that says_ 'You do not want to go there with me'_ and I feel protected by our new relationship.

"Christian, her name is Kate." He murmurs through clenched teeth. His defensive stance is easy to recognize and I am heartened that it is for me. Christian would do well to remember that.

"Kate." He gives me a polite nod then glares at Elliot. A look passes between them and I see him visibly change to be more questioning. He is trying to work this out. It is an interesting stand off that almost becomes a brawl when Elliot stands and goes over to greet Ana, wrapping her in a big bear hug. I can see Christian getting ready to thump him.

"Hi, Ana." He steps back and smiles but doesn't let go. Christian's hackles are rising but Elliot just keeps touching her. Not in a creepy way but something about this brotherly attention has Christian riled. _What is eating you Christian Grey?_ She returns the greeting and bites her lip. Christian gasps next to me.

"Elliot, we'd better go." His voice is mild but I can tell he is seething. _Mmm... interesting._ Seems like Christian has it bad. I smile at Ana reassuringly.

"Sure." Elliot turns to me and pulls me into his arms. He kisses me thoroughly and I can feel Ana and Christian's discomfort across the room but I don't let go. He is making me feel like I am the most important person in the room. His hands sweep down the sides of my face to my shoulders and mine tangle in his hair. His eyes are saying _'keep this up baby and I am taking you back to bed'._ He smiles into the end of the kiss before he pulls away.

We are staring at each other willing the other to let go. I can just imagine what our first phone call is going to go like. Feeling like a teenager I am sure that he will be calling me as soon as he gets a quiet moment. I thank God and strangely enough, Christian Grey, for inadvertently introducing us.

"Laters, baby." He can't wipe the smile off his face and I am positively glowing. He winks. _'Our secret baby'_ and I take this in and acknowledge it. He is so beautiful and for now, at least, he is so mine. His hand raises to tuck a strand of my hair behind my ear. Looking across the room I can see Christian doing the same thing to Ana. Busting some Elliot moves. He even uses Elliot's patented trade mark farewell.

Not to be outdone it seems, Elliot turns at the door and blows me a kiss. I giggle a little embarrassed. Ana looks bereft and Christian looks like he wants to vomit.


	11. Chapter 11

_******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**_

* * *

_**I will be your sexy silk**_

_**Wrap me around, round, round, round  
**_

_**I will be your pussy cat  
**_

_**Licking your milk right now, down, down, down  
**_

_**Kiss that lasts all night  
**_

_**You love to seduce me nibble and bite  
**_

_**-Sexy Silk - Jessica Cornish-  
**_

* * *

Later that afternoon my phone rings. I realise it is Elliot so I do my best sexy and efficient take-no-prisoners business voice "Kate Kavanagh speaking."

"Hey Katie." The sound of his voice holds me breathless for a moment.

"Hey yourself." I am grinning from ear to ear. "Where are you?"

"I'm still in Portland babe, Christian and I went hiking and we came back to the hotel to clean up." I have this vision of him walking around his room in only a towel and I immediately go moist.

"I thought you were going back to Seattle. Why aren't you here with me?" I smile trying to sound playful but then I realise what I have done. "Shit I'm sorry Elliot. That sounded really whiney. I didn't mean to act like a nagging wife already."

"Baby, you could never nag and wife sounds pretty cool." I gasp in surprise. _What the hell?_

"Katie, I don't want to go back to Seattle without you. Can I come over tonight?" He wants to see me! I am trying to keep the excitement down but failing.

" You don't even have to ask, Elliot. Get your butt over hear before I combust." I try for sultry and sexy but it just makes him laugh.

"I'll be right there. Shall I pick up something for dinner?" _Only if you can find something you can eat off my naked body._

"Sure. See you soon?"

"Laters, baby." I hang up and rush around the room trying to tidy up. I wonder briefly he will stay over but then wave that one away since he was meant to be back in Seattle hours ago. But now he is coming here, to me. This is it. I feel like I am getting in so deep. For a start, I can't believe that he has mentioned or even joked about the words 'wife' and 'love' in the past 24 hours. This is not the love-em-and-leave-em Elliot Grey that I have read about in the social pages.

Half an hour later his truck pulls up outside my apartment but he doesn't get out. I see him talking and I can see that he is on his car phone. He looks warily at the apartment and I think he has seen me but then he turns his face away. The conversation looks pretty heated and I feel like I am intruding even though I can't hear a thing. Then he puts his hands on the steering wheel and leans his forehead against them. I wonder what has happened, it looks like bad news or a fight and after watching a while longer I can't hold back. Grabbing a cardigan I throw it around my shoulders and head out to the truck. I tap on the passenger window and climb in.

"Hey," I put my hand on his shoulder and I can see the weight visibly lift from him. The need to comfort him kicks in and I want more than ever to be the one who can be there for him. I don't even know what has him upset. Once more it scares me how much I want this.

"Hey, yourself." He leans over and gives me a quick kiss, placing his hand behind my head to pull me in. His hand strokes my hair and I am drawn by the intensity of his eyes. I feel like I am sinking into them whenever I look at him.

"You look like you have the problems of the world on your shoulders, babe. You wanna talk about it?" I can see that he wants to but something is holding him back. I don't think it is trust, it looks more like fear. _Are you afraid of me or your secrets?_ It hurts to think that he might have them but then the Grey men are known to be social enigmas to say the least. I have friends who have encountered Elliot on the social scene and lusted after him. If they could see me now. And then it occurs to me that he might have slept with someone I know and my heart sinks. With a resolve I don't really feel I try tell myself the past is in the past. There is no choice.

His look tells me that he is wrestling with something and I am not sure now that I want to know. He strokes my face. "Let's go inside. Maybe you can help me solve them or forget them."

I smile. "You can count on me babe."

We enter my apartment carrying the bags of food that he has picked up on the way over. I lift my bag up to my face and inhale.

"Smells divine babe. Can't wait to see if you buy takeout as well as you cook breakfast" I grin at him. He laughs and moves past me and I am amazed at how quickly his mood has changed. We drop the bags on the kitchen counter and he begins opening a bottle of red wine. Since he called this afternoon I have prepared by setting the table with plates and glasses and a candle is lit in the center. Slow sultry jazz is playing on the sound system, some old Chet Baker. He smiles and hums along.

When he looks up he seems to take in what I am wearing. A slip of a dress, just enough to cover my bottom and fitted close enough to show off my cleavage. My hair is piled up on top of my head and my face is fresh with a light make up.

"You look delicious Miss K." This from the man who is pure sex. He puts down the bottle and walks over to me lifting me immediately on to the kitchen bench. His hands rub up my body and I grip his strong arms. Bending to kiss me I slip my tongue into his mouth and his tongue plays with mine. Oh I want this man now. He slides his hands up underneath my dress and he gasps when he discovers I'm wearing a tiny g string. Quickly he turns me over so I am perched on my stomach and I squeal with my legs dangling in my high heel pumps.

"Elliot, what are you doing?" I giggle.

"This" He says as he flips up the skirt of my dress to examine my lack of appropriate underwear. "Did you forget your panties Katie?" I gasp as he rubs my backside.

I'm panting. "What do you mean? I have underwear on."

His hands stroke down the length of the string to where a little scrap of material is trying desperately to cover my sex.

"I hope you didn't pay a lot of money for these. You've been ripped off." He says bending down to lick the my bottom cheeks. I am all molten sex now as my folds start to drip on his fingers. "How can you expect to soak up all this wetness if you don't wear the appropriate covering?" His tongue slips down to lick between my legs and he pushes his fingers into me. We both moan.

"They seemed totally appropriate this evening when I put them on." I pant. "When did you last get your eyes tested Mr Grey. What are you? 30 years old? A man of your advanced age may need bifocals to see my underwear."

"29 and I have 20/20 vision Katie although playing with you like this might make me go blind." He pulls his fingers out of me and sucks my juices off his fingers before lifting me back down to the ground and tidying up my skirt. I reach for him but he moves quickly to the kitchen to wash his hands and deal with the food.

"What? You're going to leave me hanging?" I am pouting with frustration.

"Oh baby, you are just going to have to wait for your dessert. It is very naughty of you to distract me like that. You know I have a sweet tooth." He winks at me as he dishes out the Lamb Korma and roti.

"I didn't know that Mr Grey, but I will take that on advisement. No sweets for you." Grinning I take my place at the table as he brings the plates over and pours me a glass of wine.

We eat, savoring the exotic curry flavors. He is beautiful to watch as he takes in every aroma before placing the food in his mouth. His tongue darts in and out to lick sauce off his lips and I am mesmerized thinking about what he was doing with his tongue not so long ago. He is so fucking sexy. He reaches over with his thumb and wipes a piece of rice from the corner of my mouth and I can't help myself. Grabbing his hand I take his thumb into my mouth and suck hard. _Yes I want you Elliot Grey and if you don't take me soon I think I will combust._ He shifts in his seat then reaches underneath the table and adjusts his jeans and I giggle placing my hand on his thigh. _Gotya._

"Have you had enough Mr Grey?" I whisper. My excitement is mirrored in his eyes.

Deliberately he picks up another mouthful of bread and I have to look down laughing at his tease. Then just as deliberately I stand up, he pushes back his chair as if to clear the table but I move over to straddle his lap before he can rise. Placing my hands on his face I lick the corners of his mouth.

"Mmmmm...you taste good." I gasp grinding against him. His erection is hard against the seam of his jeans and it rubs deliciously against my tender spot. "Are you ready for dessert?" I whisper.

Our eyes lock then he tips his head up to smile. "Do your darnedest Katie."

_Oh, you are on Grey._ I undo his jeans and tug hard. He lifts so I can slide his pants down. Without any hesitation I go down on my knees in front of him and with his cock in my hand I lick around the crown. It tastes amazing and his head goes back as he takes in a deep breath. Then he looks down at me, placing his hand in my hair. I take him deep into my throat, sheathing my teeth and pulling down the hard length. I can feel him struggling to hold back so I go again making him a little harder.

Control almost lost he suddenly lifts me up off the floor and slides my pitiful excuse for panties off. I put my hands on his shoulder reveling in their strength and balance as I step out of them without taking my heels off. He makes me feel so sexy. Moving smoothly I straddle him again, taking his length in my hand as I poise over it for a moment before sinking down onto him. I am hot and slick and the sensation is incredible. He lets out a little hiss.

"Jesus, Kate. You feel amazing." I give a little gasp, looking into his eyes. "No condom?"

I pause for a moment and look into his eyes directly. "I trust you, Elliot." His eyes widen and then he smiles. Then holding his gaze I start to move, slowly rising up and sinking back down. He grinds up to meet me and our rhythm starts to build. He pulls the top of my dress down so that my breasts are bared and he tongues my hard sensitive nipples. I keep up the rhythm driving us both to the brink. His hands reach down and gently stroke the hard nub of my clitoris sending me into immediate spasms around him. It is enough to tip him over and he pumps me full. Our bodies are both coated in a slick sheen of sweat as we come back down to earth.

I kiss him gently and I can feel everything in that kiss that he doesn't say. It is not a kiss of passion but a kiss of pure adoration and love and I am surprised that I know the difference. This man is turning my life around.

After a while I unsheathe myself from him and go to the bathroom to clean up. When I emerge he has tidied the kitchen and refilled our glasses. He hands me a glass and leads me over to the couch. I immediately curl up against him, nuzzling into his shoulder as he places his arm around me. Nothing in my life has felt so right and so good.

We sit quietly together listening to the music and he looks around at our packing boxes stacked against the wall. He frowns.

"When are you moving?" He asks.

I look up at him. "Saturday. I have an apartment and a job lined up in Seattle. But you know that." I frown slightly. What is the matter?

"I want to help you move. My sister Mia is arriving in from Paris on Saturday but Christian can pick her up. If you want me I can be available all morning."

"You don't have to do that Elliot."

"I want to." His reply is firm. There will be no argument here.

"Do you have house moving specialist on your resume, Mr Grey." Sitting up, I look at him with a smile.

"Oh, Miss K. I am pretty sure I am the man for the job." His reply is cheeky and teasing.

"What special skills do you bring to this role Mr Grey." I pretend to peer over non-existent glasses, as if interviewing him for the job, assuming my sexy secretary role. He flexes his considerable biceps at me and raises an eyebrow. I giggle and lean over to touch his arm. Shit, he is so strong.

"Mr G, what big muscles you have!" The huskiness of my voice betraying how much his body is affecting me.

"And I have a truck. A nice... big...truck." My eyes widen and I am pretty sure I am salivating at the double entendre.

"I know you do." Another suggestive reply. I'm heating up and his look is enough to make me squirm. The scent of sex is hanging in the air.

"And I am handy with... power tools." Which just about makes me come on the couch. He leans in to me and I throw myself back in my seat laughing hard in an effort to lessen his effect. "Way to bruise a man's ego, Katie."

"Oh don't you pout at me Macho man. That will get you in a world of trouble." And I can't help myself. I am immediately up in his arms and kissing him ardently.

"I want to fuck you in your bed. Nice and slow. So up you get Katie." He smack me hard on the rump and I leap off him.

"Ow." I am rubbing my butt with what I hope is a petulant look but that was hot. Then I flick my skirt up showing him my naked behind and run off down the hall way. He is up out of his seat fast and chasing me hard. The look on his face says that he had forgotten my shameless lack of panties. When he gets to the bedroom I am standing on top of my bed looking down at him with a big smile. My heart stops for a moment. This beautiful man has fallen into my life and I almost can't believe that it is real. Then he stalks me slowly as I back across the bed a little. Suddenly he launches at me and tackles me to the bed. We tumble together laughing and then kiss tenderly.

"Katie, I have to say it" He looks at me intently and I am holding my breath. "I love you."

"I know." I whisper gazing at his soft blue eyes and I know that I do too but I still can't say it. Instead I nuzzle into his neck.

And soon we are making wild, noisy love. Thank goodness Ana isn't here.


	12. Chapter 12

******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**I always wondered how Elliot managed to invite himself along on the Kavanagh family holiday. So here it is...**

**_Come away with me on a bus _**

**_Come away where they can't tempt us _**

**_With their lies_**

**_And I want to walk with you _**

**_On a cloudy day In fields where the yellow grass grows knee-high _**

**_So won't you try to come?_**

**_Come away with me and we'll kiss _**

**_On a mountaintop Come away with me _**

**_And I'll never stop loving you_**

**_-Come Away With Me - Norah Jones  
_**

* * *

I wake up at 3 am wrapped up in his body. He is all warmth and muscle and I want to stay snuggled into him but I have needs. Carefully extracting myself from his warmth I get up and throw my dress over my head. If Ana is walking about out there she doesn't need to have the trauma of seeing a naked flatmate.

I use the bathroom and then head out to the kitchen to get a glass of water. I wonder if Ana is even home yet so I quickly go down to her bedroom to check. Shit, she isn't here and it is the middle of the night. Moving quickly back to the kitchen I flick the light on and rummage around looking for my phone. Seeing it on the coffee table I run over and quickly check it for messages but then realize this isn't my phone, its Elliot's. Hell, we even have the same taste in gadgetry. I idly wonder if he uses a Mac or a PC or if he is attached at the hip to an iPad the way I am.

I have woken up the screen and it goes to the received calls list automatically. It is then that I see that the last number to dial Elliot is a number I know...well. _Shit, what the hell are you up to Daddy?_ I look up to see a sleepy Elliot wander into the room wearing only boxer shorts. He looks so incredibly sexy with his bed hair and muscular body. He rubs his eyes and then looks at me.

"You weren't in bed. I missed you." He yawns. "Come back to bed, baby."

"Elliot, why did my father call you?" This wakes him up instantly.

"It was nothing, honestly. I don't even really remember what we spoke about." He says, looking at me warily. Something isn't right about this. How did he even know we were seeing each other?

"I suggest you recover that memory, Grey, my father doesn't do stuff like this lightly. How did he even know about you?" I ask accusingly. I can't think what this might mean but I sure as hell am going to interrogate it.

"Babe, I don't know. He was checking up on his baby girl, I guess? Just being a good father." His words make sense but his look is pretty damn evasive.

"You're hiding something Grey, spill." I stand with my hands on my hips and wait patiently. This I am good at, staring down an answer. You are going to tell me and you are going to be forthcoming with it.

"OK, he seems to think that Christian and I are going to be a problem for you. I don't know what he thinks he knows but it is probably pretty far from the truth about us. I think he is just fishing to see if I am worthy of you, although how he knows that we are that serious about each other already I will never know." He looks genuinely confused by it all.

"Did he threaten you?" I ask, not sure if I want to know. If he has I am surprised that Elliot hasn't run screaming for the hills, although the thought of that makes me smile a little inside. I can see the byline _Blonde Greek Adonis Grey last seen hysterically climbing Mt St Helens!_

"No. He's a rank amateur compared to you when it comes to threats." He smiles at me.

I look at him in shock. "What do you mean. I would never threaten you."

"Baby, you threatened to remove precious body parts with a kitchen implement and mail them to my brother if I remember correctly." He gives a little laugh.

_Shit how much did I have to drink?_ I vaguely recall that one. _Oh I am a nasty drunk. _He must see my dismay and he walks over and pulls me into his arms. Holding me very tenderly he strokes my hair.

"Katie, you were protecting your friend. An admirable trait. Your father is just trying to protect you. Also an admirable trait. If between the two of you I can come out of this with my tackle intact then I will be a happy man." How can he crack jokes when my father has done this. Although a part of me is curious about what it will be like the first time they meet face to face.

I pull out of his embrace. "I need to find my phone. Ana hasn't come home."

He tenses up for a moment. "I am sure that they are fine. They are both consenting adults." But the look on his face says something else. _You're worried about them - him or her?_

I find my handbag hanging in the hall and I walk back into the lounge rummaging for my phone. In one of those incredibly smooth moves I manage to up-end my bag and most the contents spill onto the coffee table. I find my phone amongst the rubble and begin checking through for messages. There are none so I send a quick 'RUOK?' to Ana. When I look up Elliot is holding a piece of paper in his hand. He looks pissed off.

"When were you going to tell me about this?" He says quietly. I look at his hands and realize that he is holding my itinerary for Barbados. Shit, I forgot all about it. The family leaves on Monday for a two week vacation that we have had planned for the past six months. With the way everything in my world has shifted on its access in the last 24 hours I had forgotten.

"Elliot, I am sorry. I forgot all about it. My mother booked this months ago." I whisper.

"Shit, Kate, we have only just started this. And now you are going to take a break? For what, two weeks? Fuck." He looks really hurt and worried. We are both quiet, sharing the knowledge that we both feel the same and how irrational it is after such a short amount of time. Eventually he speaks, "I'm sorry baby, I just wanted to have you to myself for a bit longer. I don't want you to go."

"I have been looking forward to this for months and now I don't want to go either." I reply. I step into his arms and he drops the paper on the table, wrapping me up in a warm Elliot-is-the-sun embrace. I look up at him and see the disappointment writ large all over his face. He closes his eyes and kisses me gently then pulls back to look at me.

"I'm sorry. I'm being a complete prat. You deserve a holiday and you and I can wait. I will miss you though." His eyes are looking directly into mine and I am locked in this gorgeous man's gaze. How did this happen? How can it be that I don't want to spend more than a few hours apart from him? This holiday suddenly feels like a jail sentence.

"Can I pack you in my suitcase? Hide you in my bed?"

"Mmm...can I pretend to be a pair of your scandalous panties?" At least we are still laughing even though we are both feeling pretty crap.

"Come with me." It is out of my mouth before I can vet my words. I close my eyes in embarrassment. _Shit, how needy am I? I have known him for ten minutes and I am inviting him on a family holiday. My parents will freak, he will freak._ I feel humiliated. When I open my eyes again he is looking at me with a big wide I-just-got-want-for-Christmas smile. "You want to come with me?" I ask in a little shocked voice.

"Babe, I understand if you want to retract that offer but just hear me out for a moment." He pushes me back a little so that he can look at me. "Your Dad is already worried about us. I would welcome the opportunity to show him that I am worthy of you and how much you mean to me. I want to meet your family and the sooner the better. And then there is you and me, we have just found each other and I am pretty sure you are feeling as intense about this as I am. We need to explore what is happening between us and it would be good to do that away from any of the media scrutiny that follows Christian and I around. Plus I think if we get out of their way, that there may be something big happening with Christian and Ana too."

It was a long speech and very heartfelt and suddenly I feel the need to sit down so I can process all of this. I sink onto a dining room chair and Elliot lets me go. He pulls up a chair opposite me and holds my hand. He wants to meet my family, he wants to see how we can be and he wants to give Christian and Ana some space. This beautiful, sex God with the less than stellar reputation as a man whore is suddenly making me the center of his universe and I am going to let him. I am going to let him.

This shouldn't be happening. We should not be falling so hard so fast. We are both intelligent, attractive, well-connected and experienced people who know how this sort of attraction can be so fake and transitional. We both have seen partners come and go. Is he just my new shiny toy? Am I going to get bored with him? Or he with me? I suppose if we are totally incompatible we are going to find that out pretty fast on a holiday together. What will my parents say? They will hate this. And what if it doesn't work out? Will I come home from my lovely holiday a shattered mess? What a great way to start a new phase of my life? Draped in pink flannel and melted chocolate.

The alternative would be spending every day of my sunfilled holiday wishing he was there. Running up hideous phone bills talking to each other and being immersed in sadness. That is no way to have a holiday either. Then I have a moment of clarity.

"I need to cancel this holiday. I need to stay here for Ana. She is going to need me." I am feeling suddenly very decisive about this.

"What? No. Baby, Christian and Ana need space, time, no interference." He is sounding a little desperate. _What are you hiding Grey?_

"I don't actually give a fuck what Christian needs. Ana needs me." I snap back.

"Katie, be reasonable. Ana is a grown up. She will work this out and you are only going to be gone two weeks. What is the worst that could happen? They don't work out and she is lonely for a week or so." He is pretty convincing. Perhaps I am overreacting. Ana might be inexperienced but she is an intelligent person. There is no way that she will get suckered by Christian Grey while I am away. She will insist on taking it slow and protecting herself. If she is taking it slow then why hasn't she come home? Ana is your friend not your problem. She won't thank you for interfering. _Go - holiday - sun, surf, beach, Greek adonis - what more could you want?_

"Okay." I whispered.

"Okay?" he asked, holding my hands and peering into my eyes.

"Mm mm" I nodded my head looking directly at him. He pulls me onto his lap and gives me a very thorough kissing. His hands run through my hair and he holds my face firmly.

"Dear God, I thought you were going to say no. You certainly had me on edge."

"But if you come with me then you are totally with me. None of this bullshit about keeping an honorable distance and pretending to my parents that we aren't sleeping together. If we do this, it is a full on Kate-and-Elliot holiday or you might as well stay home." I am trying to be very strong about this. He just looks at me with shock and awe for a moment and the grins.

"Baby, I wouldn't want it any other way." _Oh crap, if my father doesn't string him up by his balls, my brother will._


	13. Chapter 13

_******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**_

* * *

_**Well I'm coming to a fork, **_

_**Sliding down a road, **_

_**Gonna lick 'em on down, **_

_**We're gonna run right out, **_

_**I'm a fighting fool, **_

_**And I'm hungry for you, **_

_**Well I'm living on a line, **_

_**I'm protecting my life,**_

_** Rock with me, come on come on,**_

_**You're only spoilin' for a fight,**_

_**-Spoiling for a Fight - ACDC  
**_

* * *

Light is streaming in through the window and it wakes me. Working on building sites means early starts for Elliot and I gather his body is usually pretty attuned to waking with the dawn but this beautiful sensual man next to me has kept me active throughout the night. He is unbelievable and insatiable and I can't stop staring at him as he sleeps. His blonde hair is a post-coital mess and he is curled up against my body. I feel him harden as he moves against my thigh in his sleep.

Stretching away from my body he opens his eyes and looks up at me, "Hi."

"Hi" I smile down at him and then he rolls so that he is half lying on top of me, instantly awake. My body responds with startling speed and no sooner do I have the thought than he is inside me and we are slowly grinding together to our release. We fall back to sleep for another half hour and when I wake up again I have to extract myself to go out to the other room and phone Ana. I am trying to pump her for information but I'm not getting very far. _Mmm so Ana has secrets... either that or she has signed an NDA._

I hear Elliot get up and head into the bathroom to shower. A few minutes later I join him. We quickly wash each other and then get dressed. It seems that our tacit agreement this morning is food and coffee, quickly. We head down to the local cafe and sit out on the sidewalk having coffee and muffins in the sun. I begin to grill him some more about his latest construction venture and I am once again amazed at how his brain works. Smart and sexy. _Mr G you are the full package._

Hand in hand we slowly stroll back to the apartment.

"Katie, I have to go back to Seattle this morning. I have a meeting with an architect late this afternoon. Can I call you tonight?" Suddenly I feel shy around him. I really don't want him to go.

"I wish you didn't have to go but I guess one of us has to earn a living." I am trying not to pout and I step in to wrap my arm around his waist. "You can call me any time."

His phone buzzes in his pocket and he takes it out to check. "Christian is driving Ana home this afternoon, they should be back by early evening." He frowns. "Damn, Christian is going to be in Portland all week and I really wanted to get his take on a development deal. I'll have to schedule a video conference with him. I wonder if I have time to set something up at the Heathman before I head back to Seattle today."

Something occurs to me and I pause in the street for a moment.

"What is it?" He asks, as he types something into his phone.

"Back from where? Where have they been? I thought they were at the Heathman." Ana never told me that she was going out of Portland for dinner. And Elliot knew.

"They're in Seattle. I guess at Christian's apartment." He is still preoccupied with his phone.

"Wow, they didn't leave until after 7 last night. I just presumed they were still here in Portland." I am thinking about this hard and becoming more and more irate. "Shit, he pretty much trapped her into spending the night with him. She has had no fucking choice. Jesus, when I get my hands on your brother you will be getting his body parts in the mail."

I storm off muttering about sexual predators and leave him standing on the side of the road shrugging off stares from other pedestrians who have taken in my language and are not impressed. He stalks after me, catching up within a few steps. He wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me to halt so that I have to look at him. I am fuming and he just looks at me like he wants lay me on the sidewalk and fuck me.

"Katie, stop. Ana would have known that she was going to Seattle."

"What and she didn't tell me. I don't think so."

"Really? If she had told you what would you have done, Kate?" Holding my gaze he watches while I ponders this. I realise that he is right.

"I would have ..." I pause then look down with a pout.

"Exactly. Look Ana is a grown up. Let her do this. If it is a mistake then you can be a good friend, pick up the pieces and be there for her. Right now, she has gone into this with her eyes wide open." And I hope like hell he is right. I wonder if he has coerced her into sleeping with him. Or maybe they have connected in the same way that Elliot and I have. I simply don't trust him but I try for calm.

"I know that you're right and I know that you trust your brother but I don't. I don't know for sure but I am pretty sure that Ana is still a virgin and this is, what? Their second official date? If he took her all the way to his apartment in Seattle then he was determined to sleep with her whether she wanted to or not and I am not convinced that she is sophisticated enough to put him off." No, I am still fuming but now I can see this is starting to piss Elliot off.

"Kate, just stop it. Ana knew what she was walking into. If the intention was to sleep together then she went to Seattle with that intention and perhaps she has coerced my brother. Who happens to be a good guy, a great guy. Ana is the one who has probably done the sexual entrapment here and you can bet that Christian will be shocked as all hell that she is a virgin."

I glare at him. "Fuck off Elliot." I am seriously pissed at him.

"Kate, you have got to calm down." Jesus, he has just accused my best friend of sexual entrapment and I have to calm down?

"Bite me, Elliot. You don't get to talk about Ana like that." I stalk off again leaving him in my wake. He charges up and turns me around.

"Believe me, biting you sounds pretty hot right now. But you don't get to talk about my brother like that either, Kate." He is still glaring at me with those icy blue eyes.

But she was a virgin. _Oh Ana, what have you done?_ Walked straight into the lion's den. Still, I am hoping that Christian is enough of a gentleman that he would never force a virgin to sleep with him. Surely he is way too smart to do that. At least I hope so for both their sakes because if he has then she is really going to be hurt. Trouble is that these Grey men are sex on legs and I know it would take a will of iron to resist him.

Then it occurs to me that he is telling me what to do. Me, Kate Kavanagh who brings grown men to their knees. How dare he tell me how concerned I should be for my friend. This is about protecting his damn brother.

"Don't tell me not to watch out for my best friend. I don't trust your brother and I won't stand by and watch him destroy her." I am all but yelling at him. Grabbing my hand he almost drags me back to my apartment. Maligning Christian has pissed him off. I guess blood is thicker than water. He is so angry at me that he doesn't speak and I decide it might be time to shut up. But I am still not going to trust Christian.

We get inside the apartment and he starts to gather his stuff together. I stand in the middle of the lounge watching him with my hands on my hips. Finally he throws his jacket on and picks up the keys to his truck. He is ready to leave and we stand there staring each other down.

"So you're just going to go." I whisper. I don't know whether to shout or cry and right now neither will help.

"Kate, I am pretty damn mad at you right now. I need to go so I can cool down." His breathing is ragged. I am frustrated but I try to retain a calm ambivalence. It's not working and I am finding it really hard to resist right him now so I am glad that he has to go. "I will call you tonight."

"Why bother?" I see he is shocked at my question.

"Because I said I would. Because I want to." He replies. "Don't do this Kate. Don't give up so easily." I am not giving up but I feel like running before he hurts me by dumping me.

"Right. And you are a man of your word." My voice is dripping with sarcasm. The claws are out. He is not the sort of man who takes kindly to a woman who challenges him, yells at him in the street, or puts down his brother. He has women lined up in every bar in Seattle, why would he need me.

"Yes, I am a man of my word. And I am not letting you do this, Kate." Its a challenge.

"Do what?"

"Give up so easily." My eyes go wide. "This is just a fight Kate. We are going to have more of these and we are going to have to move past them. You do not get to give up on us so quickly."

Tears are threatening and I am resisting running into his arms.

"Is that what I am doing? You know there is no giving up if there is nothing to give up on." Fuck. I can feel myself shutting down on him. Its in my body language, in my voice and I just can't stop it. This is what I do. First fight and we are incompatible. I know it, and I need to run before he does. I look at him and recognize myself and this is suddenly like looking in a mirror as he watches me step back. I wait not wanting to see him turn away from me but mentally and emotionally preparing myself for him to walk out.

He surprises me by stepping closer to me and I take another step back. Suddenly he drops his bag and wraps me in his arms as my tears start. His lips are on my hair and he holds me as I cry.

"Katie don't, please."

"I just didn't think it would be over so quickly." I am whispering as I try to pull myself together. It would be better if he made this quick. Then I can go and climb into my pink pjs and wait for the walls to close in. "Its okay, I've been here before. No biggie. Just go."

"Kate Kavanagh, you might want to give up at our first hurdle but I don't." My eyes shoot up to look into his. What is he saying? "This is just an argument Kate. It is not over, not for me anyway. And I suspect not for you either. Now I really have to go, even though all I want to do is take you back to that bed and reassure you that I am yours body and soul. But you will just have to take my word for it, okay."

I push back in his arms so that I can really look at him. Searching I register the truth in his words. He tips my chin up with his hand.  
"Sweetheart, I love you. You are capable of making me mad as hell. I guess that goes with the territory. And I am disappointed that you feel that way about Christian so I am going to have to find a way to change your mind. But if you think for a moment that you and I can't weather a little argument then you are very wrong. I am going back to Seattle. I am going to call tonight, as promised. Then I am going to see you on Saturday, first thing, so we can get you settled in and then we can leave for two weeks of pure unadulterated hot monkey sex in Barbados. Okay?"

I smile and nod through my tears. After a long passionate no tongues barred kiss I pull away reluctantly and he picks up his bag. He turns at the door and gives me one last peck.

"Laters, baby." And he heads out to his truck. I am stunned. He didn't walk out. I didn't drive him away. He loves me and he wants to see me again. I hug myself tight not quite believing that this beautiful, smart, sexy man wants me. Against all odds.


	14. Chapter 14

******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**If you are not into hot steamy phone sex then please don't read this.**

**_A smooth peaceful pace_  
**

**_Is running through my veins  
_**

**_I want you near  
_**

**_Let the rhythm take hold of you  
_**

**_Your mind becomes clear  
_**

**_Just breathe  
_**

**_-Breathe - Sphere-_**

* * *

Closing the door on Elliot I am amazed that I have run the gamut of emotions in the past twenty four hours. This man is taking me through the highest highs and I am allowing myself to plunge into the lowest lows but he seemed pretty intent on pulling me out. I have to wonder why he would do that. I know that he says he loves me and I am sure that he does but then how can either of us really trust a love that has come to us so quickly. Surely it can self destruct just as quickly.

I am still dwelling on this hours later when Ana arrives home. She looks exhausted but happy. I realise looking at her that she has done it. She has slept with him. But when I try to get the dirt she won't dish. This is something I don't completely understand since I am most likely to wear my heart on my sleeve but I respect her for not giving away to many details. Then I realise that I am not giving too much away either. I might be prepared to discuss the wild sex but there is no way that I am going to tell her I think I am falling inlove. Although it is probably written all over my face. Even when she asks me about leaving him behind to go to Barbados I don't give anything away. I am not sure I am ready to explain why my boyfriend of two days is suddenly accompanying my family on a holiday. Plus I think I better broach it with them first.

Elliot calls me as promised in the late evening.

"Hi baby." He sounds tired. I feel a little guilty about keeping him up all night when he had to drive back to Seattle and work.

"Hi. How was the drive back?" I ask.

"Long and boring. I wish you could have come back with me." I smile at his words. Even after our fight he wanted to be with me.

"I miss you." Too soon?

"I miss you too baby." I can hear the smile in his voice and I relax. "What are you doing?"

"Packing boxes. I had no idea I had so much stuff." I reply. My back is aching from bending over boxes all afternoon and I go and lay down on my bed. It is only when I get there that I register how rude it was of me to just walk out on Ana. I hope she isn't pissed at me.

"Sounds like fun. Not." He laughs and it is deep resonating sexy laugh that rocks me at my core. Even via phone this man can get me hot.

"Yeah, well I notice that you managed to leave without having to help me. Perhaps you really didn't have to go back to work. I think that you were just avoiding my shit." I tease him.

"Sweetheart, you found me out. What are you wearing? Have you found your underwear?" His voice has gone husky. Where are we heading with this line of questioning?

"Why Mr Grey, is this your attempt at seduction? And by the way they were a perfectly good pair of underwear. However, now I am not sure I have any on at all." _There take that Elliot Grey._

"Oh baby. Don't you think you better check? There are parts of you that might chafe without suitable coverage." He sounds hopeful. Interesting.

"If there is any chafing it is due to overuse on your part, not due to any lack of underwear." I laugh. And I am aware that although I am sore, I am tingling with anticipation about where this conversation is going.

"I think you better have a good inspection. I'll just hold on here so you can report back straight away." _Oh my God. We are really going to do this!_ And it occurs to me that I have never had phone sex before. _Can I do this with Ana in the next room? Hell, yes!_

"OK Mr Grey. I am unzipping my jeans now and I am feeling around down there. Definitely there is something there but I might need to have a closer inspection. Shall I lie down? I find most inspections in this region go better if I lie down." My voice is a low whisper. _Am I even doing this right? Oh well, in for a penny Kate. Let's do this._

"Katie, I really think you _should_ be lying down but to really inspect you will have to take those jeans off. They will only get in the way of the underpants identification process." His voice is sounding amused but a little rough. As if he isn't quite breathing properly.

"I feel very self conscious about this Mr Grey. I wonder if you could put me at ease by joining me at your end. Take off your jeans and lie down too then I will feel more confident that I will be able to make the appropriate undie identification." I giggle. This is fun.

"Already assuming the position, Miss Kavanagh." _I wonder?_

"Could you describe the position exactly please Mr Grey? It would make it much easier for me to do my job." _Please, please, please._

"Well, Miss Kavanagh. I am lying in a prone position and my hand is checking in the region of my boxer shorts. There seems to be a swelling that I might have to deal with. It seems that I may be having some sort of reaction to your vocal proximity and my visualizations of you. Could it be that I am allergic, do you think?" I laugh. While he has been talking I have removed my panties and am lying under the covers on my bed. I just don't feel brave enough to do this without a barrier to my own imagination.

"Oh Mr Grey. Let's see what we can do about that in a moment. Now I have checked thoroughly and it appears that you were correct. There are in fact no panties covering my parts Mr Grey. And I do have an overwhelming desire to do some chafing." My voice is a breathy whisper. Please don't let Ana knock on my door.

"God, Katie, hang on, let me join you." And I hear him scramble as I imagine he is stripping off. "Now where were we. I am worried that you may have a lubrication issue Miss Kavanagh. Perhaps you should check this for me." Then his voice changes. "Slide your hand down Kate, touch yourself baby."

I instantly obey his voice. "I will if you will." I whisper.

"I am baby. You have made me so fucking hard. Describe it for me baby. Tell me what you are doing." His voice is so husky and sexy and I could almost come at the sound of it.

"Your voice makes me wet. I feel so close just hearing you. My fingers are sliding through the wet folds and I am thinking about what it feels like when you do this. When you are inside me." I gasp. My body is reacting to my own words and I am writhing. "Now tell me." I whisper.

"Oh baby. The sound of your voice makes me so very hard. There was a little bead of moisture on the head that I have used to lube and now I am stroking down the length. Is there anything that you want me to do baby? Can I do anything to make it better for you." _No, yes, I mean._ Oh God, this is so hot and humiliating at the same time. I don't usually masturbate but I would do anything for this man right now.

"Can you hold your balls with your other hand? They are probably hard and aching and in need of a cupping. You need to take care of them baby." I can't believe that this is coming out of my mouth. My entire body is blushing.

"Oh, God, Kate, I can just imagine your mouth on me. Your hands holding me, stroking my length. I wish you were here." He sounds desperate and quite frankly so am I. "Kate, you need to play with your nipples, they will be hard little nubs and you will feel so good when you stroke them. Are you doing that sweetheart?"

"Yes. I can almost feel your mouth and hands on them. I love the way you lick and bite me when we make love. I like it when you are rough. I am remembering what it was like to have you inside me this morning. You were so deep inside me I could feel you touching my stomach, I swear." I hear his breathing getting heavier and more ragged. He moans at my words and I know he is close. "You are so hard, so big. I love it when you fuck me hard and fast. I love how it strokes inside me, and how you move with me. It makes me so wet, like now, oh, oh..." And just like that I am pulsing around my own fingers and I hear his breathing hitch and he gasps as he comes.

"Fuck baby. I've never done that before. That was amazing." He is panting like he has run a marathon. "Jesus, Kate, you are amazing."

"Back at ya Grey." I am not sure I can have a coherent thought right now. This amazing man has just given me an experience I have never had and I am struggling to believe that I have just done that. Seduced and made a man and myself come over the phone.

"Hang on, Katie, I've gotta clean up here a bit." I hear him stumbling about and I take the time to get dressed into my pjs. I feel all glowy and sated. I'm just a little sad that he isn't here with me and suddenly I can't wait to move to Seattle so we can at least be closer. Portland feels like it might as well be on the other side of the country. However, if the phone sex is this good maybe we would survive a long distance relationship. Perhaps next time we can try it with Skype! I shake my head at where my lascivious thoughts are going and he is back on the line.

"Thank you baby. I really needed that."

"Really? After all the hot horny sex we had this morning? You are insatiable Mr Grey." I am incredulous but then I needed it too.

"I didn't hear any complaints from you Miss K." He is reading my mind. "Besides you seem to have me in a state of perpetual horniness. My meeting this afternoon was interesting for a start. I am sure I was giving Gia the wrong idea."

"Gia?" Now I am worried. _How can you have a meeting with a Gia and be horny for me. Gia sounds like a blonde bombshell in killer heels. Are you sure you were thinking about me?_

"The architect I was meeting." He replies laughing.

"Oh." I will file that one away for later. I don't want to kill this mood by having a discussion about someone who might actually be as old as my mother. "Did your meeting go well?"

"Well-ish." He replies. " We still have a lot of details to hammer out on this build before we can get started. A difficult client by all accounts. Listen, I might get free on Thursday for a while during the afternoon. Any chance we can get together then? I really want to see you babe."

_Thursday, shit! _ "Thursday is my graduation ceremony. The reason why Christian is staying in Portland remember?" I am disappointed on one level but excited on another. Thursday is a pretty big deal for me.

"Sorry, I didn't realize. Well I guess you will have to sit through hours of boring speeches including Christian's, sorry about that."

"I hope they're not boring. I'm valedictorian." I laugh.

"Damn, Kate, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to imply you would be boring. Why didn't you tell me you were giving a speech?" He almost sounds put out.

"You had me so distracted I forgot to mention it. I apologize." Oh you sweet man. The thought of him sitting naked on the end of his bed pouting over my lack of forth comingness is suddenly both funny and sobering. I can feel myself wanting him again. Already?

"Can I come?" He sounds really put out now. Shit. It never would have crossed my mind to invite him.

"Of course you can. I just didn't think you would be interested. You've known me five minutes and you know how these things are. Regardless of my superior oratory skills and burgeoning career as a stand up comic, in the end it will still be two hours watching paint dry as they hand out diplomas to people you neither know nor care about. Two hours of your life that you won't get back."

"If you don't want me to come just say Kate." He sounds grumpy. _Oh no. Sweet man._

"Baby, I would love you to come. Just don't feel like you have to. I will understand." I am trying to be placating but I think I might be missing my mark. How can I communicate contrite over the phone?

"Great. I will be there." _Oh 180 on the grumpiness._ I smile at the thought of having him there until I realize that this means he will probably meet my parents face to face. Oh hell. This might not be a good idea. It will make me nervous for a start.

"OK. The ceremony starts at 3pm in the WSU auditorium Vancouver. I will text you the details." Oh this could be bad.

"Hey, if you are worried about me meeting your folks, don't be." Mind reading again Mr Grey. "I can do charming. I promise."

"I trust you. I better go and pack another box before I go to bed." I don't want to go. I would hang on to this line all night if I could. Just so I could hear him breath in the night.

"OK baby. I will call you tomorrow. Or you can call me." Good because I was just thinking the same thing.

"Goodnight Elliot." I whisper.

"Laters baby."


	15. Chapter 15

******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**Ever wonder about the conversations between Kate and Christian on the nights he visited Ana's room?**

**_Do you do cruel things_  
**

**_Do you spend a lot of money  
_**

**_Do you wish you were richer  
_**

**_Do you want more stuff  
_**

**_Don't fuss, don't rush  
_**

**_Hey, you're not nice  
_**

**_-You're Not Nice - Lura-  
_**

* * *

The next day I spend packing some more, working on my speech and shopping for outfits for my holiday. When I arrive home that afternoon I am greeted with the sight of Ana, in sweats, heading out for a run. She waves as she jogs past me and I almost drop my shopping bags all over the pavement. In four years of living with her I have only seen her exercise a couple of times and those were usually about being coerced into playing a social sports game. Either she is going through some kind of grown up lifestyle change or she is working off nervous energy. And then it occurs that with the events of the past few weeks it is probably both. Deciding not to question it too carefully I head inside.

When she returns I get her to give me her opinion on my new outfits. Of course, they are not all for me and I am trying to guage which ones she likes the best so I can 'lend' them to her. Ana doesn't have the same kind of disposable income that I have, nor does she have a mother who is an international clothes designer and she is pretty frugal when it comes to spending on clothes. In fact, I don't think there are more than a dozen times in four years when I have seen her out of jeans and converse shoes. But every now and then I get her to take a cast off outfit or two. What she doesn't know is that I buy stuff with her in mind, only I can never give it to her directly. She would be so offended. So we play this game where I pretend I bought it for me but don't wear it any more or they are end of season cast offs from one of my mother's shows. In fact, I have two dresses with matching pairs of shoes, all from mom's next spring line, in my closet that I am 'throwing' her way for graduation. Hopefully she will just take both without question because she has a rocking bod and will look hot in both of them. Plus mom designed them specifically for her.

Of course, I have to go through all of this subterfuge with her and bloody Christian Grey can just turn up in her life and give her a laptop and a set of first edition Hardy books without any questions. Maybe this is part of what irks me about him. He is so obviously showering her with 'stuff' which is so not Ana and I can't help but feel like he is buying her. It worries me that they are not so much having a relationship but are bartering for services.

We are in the midst of packing our bedrooms when I hear a knock at the door. My heart skips a beat thinking that perhaps it might be a surprise visit from Elliot but when I open the door Christian is standing there. I guess my disappointment must have shown on my face.

"Good evening, Katherine. Disappointed to see me?" He has a smirk on his face. _Arrogant formal prick._

"Christian, how decidedly average to see you." Might as well let him know that I don't completely approve it will keep him on his toes. "Have you come to harass my flatmate? Or is this just the run of the mill Christian Grey abduction?" _ Yeah I'm on to you._

"What does my brother see in you?" The shock must have hit my eyes and then I am fuming. Then I see it, he doesn't trust me either. And in that moment I know that as much as Elliot defends Christian, the feeling is mutual. He is only looking after his brother's interests. Time to back off Kavanagh.

"Look, we seem to have got off on the wrong foot." I say, stepping back to usher him inside. "I apologize, I just want Ana to be happy."

"And you think I won't make her happy?" He asks. _No, Christian Grey, I don't think you will._

"Just be careful with her heart, Christian. She hasn't got much experience of relationships and she is likely to bruise easily." His eyes widen a fraction as he takes in my words.

"Whatever happens between Ana and myself is our business. I hope you understand that." He is all business and I can't help but feel he is negotiating a contract. It is unnerving.

"Maybe, but when you break her, I will be the one having to pick up the pieces and put her back together." I tilt my head looking up at him. His height is imposing and he is using his good looks and stature to intimidate me. I recognize the tactic and it won't work. "Just don't break her too much."

"I'll take that under advisement. Now will show me where she is?" I pause for a moment then I move past him and lead him down to her room against my better judgement.

Half an hour later he steps out into the lounge area. I look up thinking Ana will walk out as well and frown when it is obvious that she is not coming. _What? Have you tied her to the bed Grey?_

"Katherine, do you have any wine?" He asks without a trace of self consciousness.

"Is this your MO Grey. Get her drunk and talk her into doing your bidding? Juvenile don't you think?" I am not keeping any accusation out of my voice. "You can't have much to offer."

He laughs. "Katherine, you have no idea. The wine please." We stare each other down for a moment. _Oh alright. _ I stomp off to the kitchen to find glasses and the wine. I decide that he can have the warm stuff that has never made it to the refrigerator. It will serve him right. Handing him the glass I keep my face deliberately bland waiting for him to register the warm glass in his hand.

He smiles at me then walks straight past me to the ice box and puts an ice cube in the glass. He swirls it around with one long manicured finger and then pops his finger in his mouth to suck off the wine. There is a glint in his eye as I stare at him with my mouth hanging open and he moves back past me to head to the bedroom again. Once he is gone I notice that he only took one of the glasses I poured and I walk over to the bench and skull it down. Oh my, these Grey men are something else.

Deciding I cannot possibly listen to what is happening in that room I don my ipod and continue packing. An hour or so later he emerges, looking completely satisfied with himself and lets himself out of the apartment without any more acknowledgement than a nod in my direction. Ana doesn't come out of her room and I start to worry. What if he has knocked her off and here I was dancing around to Michael Buble completely ignorant. I approach her door and hear her sobbing on the other side. After a moment's hesitation I knock.

"Ana?" I whisper. She opens the door and I can see it written all over her face. Pure devastation and confusion. I wrap her up in a big Kate hug. "What's wrong? What did that creepy bastard do?"

I don't want to put him down but he does creep me out and I wish that she and Elliot could see it. He just has pure predator written all over his face and he uses his sensuality as a weapon. No wonder he never has a girlfriend! He must eat them alive! And for a moment I am terrified that perhaps he is some sort of sexual serial killer.

We sit on the edge of her bed and she looks all set to unravel but then I can see she is holding back. What sort of hold does he have over her? We are usually both a lot more forthcoming than this and then I wonder if perhaps the Grey men have this ability to silence their women in common. My feminist persona starts pushing back at this idea. If Elliot was having that sort of hold over me I wouldn't want to be with him would I?

I know that they have had sex, she has terrible sex hair and I brush it out for her as we talk.

"I just don't think our relationship is going to go anywhere." She is so sad and I can see that she really wants this to go somewhere. Once more I wonder how Elliot or I can help them out. Well I don't particularly care for Christian but if Ana can see something redeeming in him then I should at least support her to try.

"I thought you said you were going to see him on Wednesday." Then she confesses that she sent a joke email that backfired and he thought she was breaking up with him. Oh my. He really does want her. He would not have dropped everything to drive over here if he didn't and I tell her so. And then I hear Ana Steele use language that is not usually in her repertoire.

"He came here to fuck me, that's all." I am shocked.

"Who said romance was dead?" I think and then I realize that I have said that out loud. She shrugs at me.

"He uses sex as a weapon." _Yeah, I picked that up already, Steele._

"Fuck you into submission?" I ask almost as a joke but something registers on her face and I wonder at my words. There is something really weird about all of this but I can tell she isn't going to say any more. It is like she has a gag order or something. She seems to be measured with her words and once again I wonder about the power this man is wielding. It just isn't normal.

I let her change the subject to Elliot and we talk a little more but I am guarding myself as well. Only I am better with diverting her from the truth. What can I say, it is a Kavanagh skill. I remember to pass on the message that her mother won't be coming to graduation tomorrow because her stepfather (no. 3) has sustained an injury. I feel for her but sometimes I think Carla likes the distance between them. At least Ray, Ana's step dad from Carla's second marriage and the man she calls Dad is a little more stable in her life. I just hope that Christian Grey isn't another disappointment in her life.

The next night I try to give her my best unbiased support before she goes out on her date with Christian. She is nervous, more nervous than I would have expected for someone who is so doing the wild thing with a man who seems to want to devour her. I wish she had a little more self confidence. Then she could knock Christian on his ass instead of seeming so intimidated by him. After seeing her off I am restless. I want to wait up for her to arrive home but I suspect she might not make it home tonight. I am wondering about calling the guys up to go out for a drink when I hear a knock on the door.


	16. Chapter 16

******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**Here is my take on how Elliot ended up in building. This is not to diminish the expertise of the industry in any way but in FSOG we encounter Elliot mucking in with his crew when Ana and Christian arrive at the house and he is up on the roof working. I considered that he might have worked his way up through an apprenticeship rather than university and that there may have been some resistance from Grace and Carrick. It's just an idea.  
**

_**I know that you're smart **_

_**You mentioned it before **_

_**You can read and write,I'll bet **_

_**Well baby, you perform**_

_**Aim low, you just met me I know **_

_**But I feel something right now **_

_**So aim low, just let yourself go **_

_**All I need is tonight, yeah**_

_**-Smart - Helmet-  
**_

* * *

"Hey baby." Elliot is leaning against the door on one arm wearing jeans, t-shirt and a leather jacket. He looks so damn hot and I can't help but feel his hotness to the pit of my stomach and beyond. Oh my.

"Hey yourself." I smile and try to keep my body cool and calm but I am like a volcano about to go off inside. This man makes me want to puddle on the ground with his hotness. He leans in for a gentle but passionate kiss and then he is picking me up, my legs around his waist and we all but fall inside my apartment. It gets really wild, really fast. His erection pushing into me, his hands firmly stroking down the length of my body. And I am all sensation just holding on to him for dear life.

He grinds himself into me as he pushes me back up against the wall and then he is lifting my t-shirt over my head. I push his jacket off and start on his shirt. Our mouths move to interrogate the skin of each other's body, licking and sucking the saltiness. I find his nipples and bite down gently hearing him hiss as he throws his head back and then he pushes me back so he can have access to my now braless breasts.

It is my turn to lean back to give him better access and he is holding me upright with firm hands on my back as I enjoy his laving tongue devouring me. My hands are on his muscular biceps just trying to find some traction as he works me over. Then he quickly picks me up again and walks with me down the hall to my room, kicking the door open with his boot and nudging it closed after us.

Throwing me down on the bed he reaches over and undoes my jeans, dragging them down my legs as I lift my hips to accommodate him. His hands trace down my legs as he pulls both my pants and my shoes and socks off in one movement. He picks up one foot and starts to kiss my instep then begins an ascent with his tongue up my leg, my thigh and then there. _Oh fucking my._

His tongue licks over my over sensitive clitoris and then he pushes into my already soaking wet folds and I just about catapult off the bed. My body is about to go over the edge already and then he finishes me with the insertion of his finger. I can't hold it back and I scream out my orgasm pulsing around his fingers as he licks the juices lovingly.

My body takes a while to come down and he lifts up to watch me as I try to get my breathing under control. My hand is draped over my eyes and I laugh. This is just too good. He is up over the top of me.

"What is so amusing Miss Kavanagh?" He is smiling but perhaps a little hurt too. I reach up and place my hands on either side of his face. I pull him down towards me in a sudden change of mood.

"Nothing." I whisper and I kiss him thoroughly, tasting myself on his lips and tongue. So hot. Then without saying anything I push him up off the bed. He goes willingly and I sit up enough to undo his jeans and divest him of pants and boxers. He toes his shoes off in an effort to help me and I smile as he removes his socks last. Then he is on the bed beside me, kissing me again and feeling me with his strong hands.

"Make love to me." I whisper, the words no sooner out of my mouth than he is up over me. He lifts my leg up over his shoulder and pushes into me and I can feel him so completely I cry out. He thrusts hard into me but not enough to hurt me and I see the strain on his face. He is holding back.

"Don't." I say. And he pauses, I realise that he thinks I want him to stop. "Don't hold back." I whisper.

"Oh Katie. I could never hold back." He doesn't, thrusting hard into me he holds himself up off my body and slams harder and harder into me and with ever thrust he is hitting my sweet spot. It is magical and erotic and I feel myself building again. The pace is hard and steady.

"Come with me Kate. Fuck." His words are enough to tip me over the edge again and he pours into me as I convulse around him. It goes on forever and I am all sensation. Eventually he pulls out and we lie curled up against each other looking up at the ceiling. We don't talk, we just are.

I stretch my arm up in the air tracing lazy circles in the air with my wrist. He reaches up and holds his hand against mine examining the size of my small palm against his large one. He has callouses from his work and I pull his palm down to my mouth and gently kiss each one, sucking them as if to soften them. His eyes watch me with a smile and I pull away enough to blow cool air on his hands. His hand wraps around my cheek and he pulls my face around to look at him.

"Beautiful, Katie. What am I going to do with you?" He shakes his head his eyes disbelieving.

"Mmm... let me see. You could fuck me again. Or... you could feed me." And on cue my stomach rumbles making us both laugh. He sits up and then reaches out to help me up as he stands.

"Miss K, we don't fuck. We make wild monkey love but nothing as crass as a fuck. It sounds cheap." He says raising my hand to his mouth and kissing it.

I smile and sashay past him pushing him back away from me as I go.

"I don't know," I say over my shoulder. "A good fuck never hurt anybody." Then I take off at a run down to the bathroom. He is after me in an instant catching me aroundthe waist just as we get inside the door. He holds me in locked arms as he reaches into the shower and turns into the water and then pushes me under the cold stream.

I scream and grab him pulling him in with me. "Suffer Mr Grey." We are both laughing and gasping as the water slowly heats up. I wipe the wet hair back off my head and the water out of my eyes as he grabs my face and kisses me passionately. Our tongues thrusting into each others mouths as our passion builds. He turns me around to face the wall and places my hands up on the cool tiles. Spreading my legs apart he thrusts into me from behind and I move to angle and take him in. Letting the pace build again his arms are around my waist and he feels down between my legs at the right moment, gently stroking my nub to take us over the edge together. My legs feel weak and my pussy is aching with sore goodness as he pulls gently out of me and begins to wash me.

We kiss and scrub and touch and soap each other before climbing out of the shower fifteen minutes later. He wraps a towel around his waist and the holds one out for me and wraps me up. He continues to kiss me from time to time as he dries my body and I know that I could do this forever with this man. He takes my breath away. We retrace our steps through the apartment stopping to pick up clothes and dress each other. It is all so natural as if we have been lovers for years instead of minutes.

By tacit agreement we get ourselves together and head out the door. We go in his truck, because I can't imagine him folding himself into my sports car but mostly because I don't think my legs could function well enough to operate a vehicle. I may have to take a leaf out of Ana's book and do something about my fitness.

We end up at the local diner and I can't help but think this is exactly what I need. We both order the house burgers, with fries and salad and coke. Diet coke for me. We talk about his project until the food arrives and I can't help but think this is the best food I have ever tasted in my life. I am feeling a little dreamy when he gets a serious look on his face.

"What's wrong?" I ask.

"Is it that obvious?" He answers and I think the worst suddenly. _Oh this is it. This was the sex before I get dumped. Shit, how did I not see this coming._ All of this must have played across my face because his eyes suddenly look alarmed.

"No Katie, it isn't that. When are you going to learn to trust me?" He almost looks hurt. I try to recover some equilibrium.

"So what is it?" I am so relieved that this isn't the big goodbye that I think there is nothing he can tell me that could be that bad.

"Baby, I know that I said I would come to watch your speech tomorrow but something has come up and I ..." I look at him and he looks so distraught and I can't help it. As I start to laugh I quickly cover my mouth with my hands. Oh this precious man. He looks sad and then bemused as he takes in my reaction.

I try to stop giggling long enough to answer him.

"It's okay. I think I can live if you don't sit through a boring 2 hours of graduation ceremony on my behalf. I giggle again but he looks kind of sad.

"I really wanted to see you give your speech. I'm so damn proud of you Kate." He looks genuinely upset now and it is sobering.

"That is so sweet but it is just a ceremony. My brother will most likely video it anyway and you can watch me on youtube." I try to sound light. I just can't quite understand this reaction. "People get degrees everyday. Its no biggie." And then I see it. Something akin to remorse. What is he trying to tell me? That he doesn't have...

"Not every day." He says sadly.

"Are you telling me that you don't?" I ask. I don't want it to sound like an accusation but it does seem a little odd that someone with his background, doctor mother, lawyer father, didn't complete his higher education.

He leans back in his seat looking decidedly uncomfortable and runs a hand through his hair. "I never went to college Kate. I don't have a degree." I think about this for a moment. It doesn't bother me in the slightest but it seems to really bother him.

"But you are successful without one. Not everyone needs a degree to get what they want out of life. Ever heard of academic inflation?" I ask. He looks up at my face and I smile reassuringly but he doesn't look convinced. He looks down at his hands rubbing the callouses.

"I couldn't go to college." He says quietly without looking at me. It couldn't have been money, the Grey's have never been short of a dollar and I know that Christian went Harvard but dropped out to become a business mogul.

"Did you want to?" I ask. There it is the crux of his problem. It is written all over his face. So what stopped him?

"I couldn't pass the entrance tests. I guess I just wasn't smart enough." This floors me. Anyone can tell by talking to him that he is articulate and intelligent. That should have been enough. "I'm dyslexic." He murmurs. I can feel the shame and anger emanating from him. Oh baby. I reach out and take his hand.

"But I don't get it, dyslexia shouldn't have stopped you from going to college. I know people who have made it through higher education with all sorts of learning difficulties before. Didn't your parents or teachers get you help?"

He seems embarrassed and he keeps his focus on the table as he speaks. "I wasn't diagnosed until I was 16. All the way through I had managed to hide it with a good memory and a lot of charm. Since I was 12 there has always been a string of girls who would 'help' me out. All that did was mask the problem from everyone. When I got to the serious exam end of my schooling I rebelled. I didn't know what was wrong with me, all I knew was I couldn't make sense of exam papers. I went off the rails for a while and finally my Dad figured it out but by then I was pretty convinced I was stupid. I would blow off anything that required me to sit a test even math, which I was actually pretty good at. My attitude sucked. I forced Mom and Dad to back off by being passive-aggressive. Every time they tried to help I would do something stupid and get myself suspended from school. My building apprenticeship saved me. Now I regret not taking the help when it was offered but I valued my reputation more than my education back then. I was just a typical dumb ass teenager, I guess. "

"Being dyslexic has nothing to do with intelligence. And college has very little to do with success. You are driven and talented at what you do. If you weren't smart and insightful then you wouldn't be where you are today." I say trying to reassure him. Eventually he looks up at me and leans across the table.

"Katie, you are so bright and beautiful. You are good with words and writing. I really envy that. And I guess a part of me is shit scared that you will get bored with me. That I won't be smart enough to keep up. Your father is sure not going to like some dumb builder dating his daughter." His eyes are back on our hands as he traces his hardened fingers against my soft ones.

"Don't see yourself like that Elliot. You are much smarter than a piece of paper is going to tell anyone. My father is going to see that within five minutes of meeting you." I pick up his hand and kiss his palm. "I like a man who is good with his hands." I smile at him.

He is out of his seat so fast and he lifts me up to wrap his arms around me. "God I love you Kate." Then he kisses me, in front of the whole diner and I can't help but feel proud that this gorgeous strong man is declaring himself in front of all these strangers.


	17. Chapter 17

******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**This a longer one that could have been split into a couple of chapters. Sorry. Before you jump on me about Gail being older than Jason, I am taking some artistic license. As always the characters belong to EL James.**

**People look at me confused when I lovingly **

**Refer to you as my**

**Man toy, lover boy, sweetheart that brings me joy **

**Better half, sweetie pie **

**Yes, I'm still seein' that same guy**

**No labels, no fuss, livin' in the now for us **

**Or can I call you my boyfriend? **

**Man toy, lover boy, come over here and bring me joy **

**Man toy, lover boy**

**-Boyfriend? - Laura Bell Bundy-  
**

* * *

"What next after college? We stand here on the brink of the rest of our lives and in our hands today we will receive the piece of paper that will answer that question definitively. Fat chance!" There is a titter from the audience. "We stand on the edge of a huge abyss, one that is not clearly defined by our last four years of study. Rather it is defined by our decision to go out and take life by the horns and live it. Our lives have been lived in books, on computers and very, very occasionally in classrooms and lecture theaters." The embarrassed laughter from the student body filters up to the stage while the assorted faculty nod sagely in agreement.

"Well... for some of us. Others may have been living in fan fiction, facebook and sleeping over a desk or a keg but you get my point. Which is - that college has given us a bubble in which we were encouraged to grow and think and become. But it is an abstraction of the world that we will take with us and keep close on cold nights to remind us of a golden age. Very recently I have met some very successful people who have been living out loud without the benefit of a piece of paper from a university. Do you know they sometimes envy us our bubble, our knowledge, our abstraction? But they have 'become' without the need of this type of affirmation." I can feel the academics and the parents shuffling nervously but I push on.

"Don't under or over value your academic achievement. We are in an age that has been subject to academic inflation but in spite of most of us not being qualified enough to wait tables, we need to celebrate the possibilities of our lives." More laughter. "We may not need the piece of paper but it will open doors from time to time. We also need those creative, innovative individuals and teams who show us there is another way. Together we can make great things happen. Hopefully not **all** of it illegal. So what next after college? Who knows? But be ready. Jump in feet first and grab the hands offered to you. And play, swim, sink from time to time. But most of all live."

The audience are suddenly on their feet and I look around and smile. A tear has slipped from my eye as I consider how much of my speech changed last night after my night out with Elliot. I mourn for what he feels he has lost but I also am so incredibly awed by the man he is. And I look at Christian for a moment grateful for the support and guidance he has given Elliot to enable his dreams to flourish. I smile a little at the floor as I shuffle off to my seat.

After the ceremony Christian corners me in the corridor. He has been the guest speaker at the graduation giving an impassioned insight into the research of WSU, his own personal journey and the plight of the world's poor. I knew he was philanthropic, that he donated large amounts to research at the university but not that he actually cared so much about what that research might afford to the world. There is so much more to Christian and Elliot Grey and I can understand now why Ana is so mesmerized by Christian.

"Katherine. I need to speak to Ana but I don't want to bring her unwanted attention by walking out there." He looks like a boy. Hopeful. He smiles. "Could you go and get her? Please." My good mood is going to work in his favor. Nodding, I move out to the main auditorium and see her getting ready to go and find Ray. I'll have to be quick.

"Ana." I have to shout over a group of people who won't be moved. " Christian wants to talk to you." Two girls next to her turn around and stare at her like she has grown a second head. _Yeah that's right, my girl Ana and Christian Grey, what of it?_ "He sent me out here." I am almost breathless as I finally work my way through the crowd to get to her.

"Your speech was great Kate." She is beaming at me and I give her a big Kate K grin.

"It was, wasn't it?" And I am really happy although I wish that Elliot had been there to see me. Ana moves off to find Christian and I turn around to see my brother Ethan pointing a video camera at me. I start posing and pouting and he laughs.

"Yeah, work it baby." He lowers the camera turning it off and then wraps me in a big brother hug.

"Well done, sis. You were awesome." He gives me a kiss on the cheek and then grabs my hand.

"Come on, Mom and Dad are outside talking to the Michaelsons. They're waiting to go to the marquee with you. I think they want a Kavanagh entrance." He rolls his eyes and I laugh following in his wake. My parents congratulate and hug me when I walk up to them and we all head towards the marquee. I see Ana standing with Ray but no Christian. Looking around for him I can't help but think he won't be far away. He is like a satellite when it comes to her and suddenly a little devil is on my shoulder.

I turn to Ethan. "Hey, do you see Ana over there." I point her out.

"Oh yeah, wow she looks pretty hot." He replies and I know that he has a bit of a thing for her but he would never act on it because she is my best friend. Will he forgive me for this?

"Look, she and Ray seem a bit lost and I have to go and talk to the VC. Could you go over and say hi? Just look after them until I can get there? Please, Ethan." I do my best little sister whine and he rolls his eyes again.

"OK, but you owe me one Kate. Be quick." He pecks me on the cheek and moves off toward them. At that moment I catch Christian's eye. He looks at me with accusing eyes and I offer a little smile and wave then move in his direction.

"That was a very impassioned speech Mr Grey." I say as sweetly as I can.

"What are you up to Katherine?" Why does he call me that. It is starting to really annoy me.

"What do you mean?" I turn innocently and look in Ana's direction. "Oh, that's my brother, Ethan. Come and meet him."

Anger is radiating off Christian in waves. _Scared of a little competition Mr Grey. Well my brother can give you a run for your money. Let's see what you've got._

I take his arm and we stroll towards the group. He is trying to look calm and in control. I can feel through his sleeve that he is anything but.

"Hello Ray." I let go of Christian and give Kate's dad a quick peck on the cheek. He blushes. Then the devil rears its ugly head again. "Have you met Ana's boyfriend? Christian Grey." Collective jaws drop and the only person who doesn't seem phased by this announcement is Christian. _Damn._

Christian is so smooth as he takes over the conversation with Ray who looks surprised but happy at this announcement. _Shit, it was meant to be more awkward than this._ So I change tack.

"And this is my brother, Ethan Kavanagh," I say to Christian thankful that Ethan still has his arm around Ana. _Take that Grey. Ha! _ Ethan shakes his hand firmly not phased at all by the Grey factor. I suspect its because he has his own Ethan Kavanagh thing going on. Christian has gone all predator again and looks like he wants to brawl.

"Ana, baby." Christian holds his hand out to Ana and she walks out of Ethan's hold to stand submissively at Christian's side. I can feel my jaw drop and I half expect her to say 'yes, sir'. It seems I might have lost this battle but the war is far from over Christian Grey. I grab Ethan under the pretense of seeing Mom and Dad and we move away.

"What the fuck was that?" Ethan whispers to me as we move through the crowd.

"You just met Christian Grey, the dominant." I giggle and Ethan laughs. Though part of me isn't quite sure if that isn't a true description of Christian Grey.

My family is sitting at Andina our favorite Portland restaurant. My dad has toasted my success and we are all doing what we usually do. Debating the merits of the latest election campaign. Our discussions are usually pretty heated and my Dad the staunch Republican loves to get Ethan and I riled up. It is fun and a bit of a tradition but not great for onlookers who often take us far too seriously.

My mother holds her own in all of this but sits back to watch us all fondly for a while. She is a designer which is where I get my love of clothes from and she is elegantly dressed in one of her own creations, as am I. She smiles at me.

"Are you going to tell me about him?' I look at her a little shocked. How does she know? Perhaps Dad has told her. I still haven't confronted him about his phone call.

"I don't know what you are talking about Mom." I take a sip of my wine and hope that she will drop the subject.

"Darling, I know when there is a man. Who is he?" She keeps her voice low so as not to attract the attention of Ethan and my Dad who are still having a deep political discussion. I don't want to lie to her but this is all so new and I don't want to curse it by sharing too much. I take a deep breath.

"Elliot Grey." I say but add no more. Her eyes have widened.

"The developer? Brother of Christian?" She looks surprised. _ Mmm... Daddy doesn't tell you everything I see._

"What? Elliot Grey is still sniffing around you? I thought I warned him off." My father looks angry and I wonder why. But I am angry too and I am not going to be cowered by it. I am curious.

"Yes, well, I know about your phone call and you won't get him to back off Dad. Although for the life of me I can't think why you want him to." I lift my glass challenging him. My mom is looking shocked and I know that she is going to rip into him on the way home. My father has been in his time a very talented investigative journalist and he can still smell a story from 50 miles away. He wouldn't do this if he wasn't genuinely sure that there isn't a story here. So what is it about my Elliot that he thinks he knows?

"I just don't trust those Grey boys. They are sharp operators Kate, good at what they do but there is something about them that is ...off." Leave it to Dad to keep me hanging. He is acting on a hunch and I am pretty sure that it is unfounded.

"Father dearest, I tend to agree with you about Christian but Elliot is different. You are going to meet him. I have invited him to come to Barbados with us." _Fire them torpedoes and run like hell._ I can see the steam coming out of my father's ears.

"You've done what? Kate why would you do that." I look at Ethan who just shrugs smirking into his glass. A case of 'rather you than me' I think and I know that I won't get any support from him.

"Elliot and I are together and we are serious. I want you to meet him, properly and he and I want to find out where our relationship is going." I say this with a confidence that I am not really feeling. He is going to spend five minutes with my father and head for the hills. This holiday may be the worst decision we have ever made.

"Well, I for one am thrilled that you have invited him." Support from my mother? Wow. She smiles at me and we both turn to Dad. He knows he is being ganged up on and he humphs as he sits back.

"I still don't like it." He mutters taking an angry swig of his drink. _Daddy, when are you going to learn that if you try to dictate my life I will rebel. _He reads the message in my eyes.

"Daddy, would you rather that I carry on this relationship behind your back? Won't you at least give him a chance. Get to know him. I think you will learn to love him."

"As you obviously do." My mother says and I blush to my toes. Did I just admit this to my family? Stupid, stupid, stupid. Ethan just about chokes on his drink and then gives me a big hearty you've-done-it-now grin. I cast my eyes down more embarrassed than I have felt in most of my short adult life.

There is a pause while my father processes everything and then he seems to make a decision with a calculating look that I both recognize and mistrust. Maybe he is far from resigned to this relationship but he covers it by reaching over the table and taking my hand. "Katie, if he is that important to you then OK. Let's see if this young man is worthy of my little girl. But if he hurts you..."

"Yeah I know, testicles, blunt knives...he's heard it all before Dad." We all laugh at the standard Kavanagh threat that my father has offered every boyfriend since I turned 16 and started dating. Deep down I know that I will have guard Elliot from my dad. And I will have to find out what Dad knows before it damages me.

When I arrive home I am buzzing with success of the day and in anticipation of my holiday. Energized, I burst into the apartment but my face drops as I take in Ana on the phone sobbing uncontrollably. She is on the phone to her mother and I can tell by her body language that this has something to do with Christian. When she hangs up I attack.

"Has that obscenely rich fucker upset you again?" I can't help but feel that I should have dragged Ana and Ray out to dinner with us. Then perhaps Ana would be in one piece. She stumbles incoherently over her reply.

"Just tell him to take a hike, Ana. You've been so up and down since you met him. I've never seen you like this." I can't help but think that if he was normal and committed then she would be as happy as I am with Elliot. Suddenly it doesn't seem fair that two brothers, brought up in the same family, could have such a different standard in how to conduct themselves in a relationship. I want this to be a black and white decision for her but I know that it will be more complicated than that.

Ana goes to sit down on the couch and I notice that she is moving stiffly like she's been beaten with a baseball bat. She gives me some story about falling over on her butt and I want to believe her because I know she can be unco but something about the way she says it just doesn't ring true. Then I think back to the dominant/submissive behavior at the graduation ceremony and an awful thought pops into my head. Is he hitting her? I am a little horrified at where my thoughts are going so I retreat to the kitchen in search of wine. Placing my hands on the kitchen bench I take a few deep breaths. How to handle this? If I am wrong she is going to hate me forever. If I am right then I need to get her out of it. Is this what my father thinks he knows about Christian? Surely not.

I emerge from the kitchen and hand her a drink.

"Here we go." I am so uncertain how to proceed. _Gently. _ "Ana, if he's a jerk with commitment issues, dump him. Though I don't really understand his commitment issues. He couldn't take his eyes off you in the marquee, watched you like a hawk. I'd say he was completely smitten, but maybe he has a funny way of showing it." _Please Ana, talk to me. He creeps me out but is he hurting you, for real?_

"Kate, it's complicated. How was your evening?" She is diverting me like she usually does. Subject closed, off limits. I chat with her for a while, hoping that if she relaxes she might say something but she is well and truly closed. I give her a hug. I have to call Elliot.

"Hi babe, how did it go?" He sounds happy to hear from me and I am certainly happy to be talking with him. I tell him about the ceremony and my speech and promise him that Ethan has captured it all on video.

"I told my family about you coming to Barbados." I wait and he is silent.

"And...?" He almost whispers and I can hear the lack of confidence in his voice.

"And.. they are thrilled that you are coming with us."

"Yeah, except your father." He mutters. Poor baby, he really is worried about meeting my Dad face to face and it sounds kind of sweet.

"Even my father." I say softly although I know it's a lie.

"Really?" I hear hope in his voice. _Oh Elliot you are so sweet. _

"Really. I told them how much you mean to me and they want to spend some quality time with you." I say, stating as a matter of fact. _Just a little lie, baby._

"How much I mean to you?" He sounds a little incredulous. "What did you say?"

"Pretty much that." I shrug. "That you mean a great deal to me and that we want the opportunity to see where this is going. If we have a future together. You know... that we are serious about each other."

"Wow." I hear him blow air out. "You are one brave woman, Kate Kavanagh. How did they take it?"  
"Well, if you can believe it, my mother saw it before I even said anything. I guess there is just no hiding things like that from your mother right?"

"I guess. Oh shit. My mother." He is panicking. "I told my mother about you yesterday over lunch. Do you think she could tell? She never said anything."

I laugh. "I don't know your mother well enough to answer that babe. My mother can read me like a book. She asked me about you almost as soon as dessert was served. Your mother might not be as intuitive about you."

"Why? Because I'm adopted?" He asks a little hurt sound in his voice.

"No, because your a boy. I don't know if Mom would read Ethan as well as she does me." I giggle at his insecurities. He is so cute.

"Well, I am glad that you have let them know. Now I can book a ticket without feeling like an interloper." I smile to myself, wishing that my Dad wasn't planting seeds of doubt as I remember what I called him for.

"Elliot, I need to ask you something and I don't want you to get mad. Okay?" I am really nervous about doing this but I can't go off on a two week holiday and leave Ana behind if she is actually in danger.

"Sure." he sounds wary. "What is it?" I just hope that Elliot can remain calm in the face of what could be such a hideous accusation about his brother. I want very much to be wrong about all of this.

"It's about Christian." I pause not quite sure how to go on.

"What about Christian, Kate?" He sounds wary and he knows that I don't really trust Christian. Now I am so worried that Elliot will end up hating me for this and I want to call a halt to this conversation. But I go on.

"It's Ana...she is acting strange...out of character." I say. He is silent at the other end of the phone. "I don't know...Christian is so dominant with her, or she is submissive to him...I'm not sure how to explain it. He seems to intimidate her so much and then today..." I stop. _I can't do this._

"Kate, sweetheart, what happened today?" There is a fear in his question. But he also sounds like he expected this. _What the hell is going on?_

"Elliot, Ana is acting like she has been physically hurt. She said it was an accident but...he looked like...and she, well she looked like she would have knelt at his feet if he asked. I kept expecting her to call him Sir. It's like he has this strange control over her and..." And now I am frightened that I have gone too far. "I am worried that he is hitting her." I whisper.

He gasps. "Shit. Kate. I don't know... I just..." And suddenly this is not what I expected to hear. He knows something. Or he suspects. "Listen, I am not sure of anything except that my brother is a really good man, an ethical man. But he doesn't do normal relationships. I don't really know more than that nor is it any of my business but from what I have read about it, if he and Ana are...well whatever they are doing...then it is likely to be consensual. He wouldn't do it if she didn't agree."

"What are you talking about? BDSM?" I am incredulous. _What the fuck is Ana getting herself into? _ "But she has never had a relationship with any man. Not a sexual relationship." And then it occurs to me. Is that why? Because she wants that kind of relationship and now Christian Grey has appeared and he is giving her what she actually wants? My mouth is hanging open and we are both silent for a long while.

"Look, Katie, I really don't believe that Christian would hurt her in anger. He has had a lot of shit in his life and he is so much stronger emotionally than he has any right to be. Its because he works really hard to keep everything in control, he compartmentalizes everything. Even our family relationships. But he also has a great capacity for love and like I told you before there is something about this thing with Ana that is different. He is different. If they can work this out I really believe that Ana will be good for him. But this BDSM thing, I think that is different as well. I think that they have to both want it and if she doesn't want it I'm pretty sure he wont' force her."

I am having a hard time processing all of this when he continues, "The other thing you should know is that he has people around him who keep an eye on things. He pays them as staff and they live and work in his apartment but they are my friends and we all care about him. None of us would let anything go too far. They will do everything they can to keep Ana safe. Because they love Christian."

"What? Who are you talking about?" This seems a little far fetched.

"A few years back I found out that Christian was in a relationship that wasn't great. It was BDSM and it was consensual but he had been underage when it started. With a much older woman. We, Jason and Gail and I got him out. He doesn't know our part in it and I would rather he never did. But we made a pact back then to keep his private life, private and to keep him safe."

"Who are they?" I ask.

"They're old high school friends but they work for Christian now. They have done for the past four years. Jason is his body guard and Gail is his housekeeper. They know more than I ever want to know about his lifestyle but they are good people. You can trust them with Ana."

"Oh, shit. I am so scared for her." I whisper. Then it occurs to me how much he has told me. How much he trusts me and I am humbled. "Why would you tell me all of this?"

"Katie, I love my brother and I love you. I want ... this thing with you ... I know I am in it for the long haul babe. That means you need to know all of my shit. But you have to promise me that you won't tell what you know. What he does, what they might be doing, it's not against the law, hell, it isn't always even dangerous from what I know. Just a little more kinky than phone sex." This pulls me up sharp. I need to go and do some research. "So please, without asking you to sign a non-disclosure agreement, can you keep this between you and me? And I promise you that I will be the first in line with the blunt knife if he ever steps across the line with her."

I laugh just a little at this. "Okay." I whisper. "Elliot, thank you for being so honest with me. You didn't have to."

"Yes, I did, sweetheart. You are mine now Katie, to love and to cherish. Trust goes with the territory." This whole thing is taking my breath away, Elliot and Christian. I am reeling. "Listen I have to go, I have an early start tomorrow. You need to go take care of Ana. And I know you, go do some research. You will understand it all better than I do."

And once more I am struck by how difficult it must have been for him to succeed in a world where literacy skills are required to get ahead. I am so proud of who he is.

"Laters baby." His voice is quiet.

"Laters Elliot." I whisper.

I head back out to the living room to check on Ana but she has gone to bed. Deciding to make a cup of tea I am just about to ask her if she wants one when there is a knock, no a thump at our door. At first I am a little worried about opening up and then I hear him on the other side of the door.

"Anastasia, Katherine, open up. It's Christian." Thump, thump, thump.

I wrench open the door, all my anger and hostility at the forefront. This kinky bastard is screwing around with my friend and he is not getting off that lightly with me. I might not tell the world his secrets but I sure as well will tell him what I think of him.

"What the fuck do you think you are doing here?" He is breathing hard and staring back at me with frantic worry. _What? What is he doing here? He left her crying and now he is acting like he gives a shit?_

"Katherine I need to see Anastasia." He goes to walk past me and I block him.

"Well you can't." I snap back at him.

"Get out of my way, she emailed me and I need to see her." His eyes are blazing.

"What the fuck have you done to her now?" He emailed her. _Why doesn't he just leave her the fuck alone?_

"Look, she sounded upset, I just want to check she is okay." He closes his eyes as if he is in pain then opens and refocuses on me.

"Since she's met you she cries all the time." I see the horror on his face. _Yeah, well if you want to treat her like she is some toy that you can use and discard then what do you expect you fucker._

"Please get out of my way." He pushes me to the side.

"You can't come in here?" I am vaguely aware that the front door is still open and our neighbors might be listening but what the hell? We are moving in two days.

He stalks through the apartment and bursts into her bedroom and I follow hot on his heels. If she wants him gone then I am going to throw him out on his ear. I don't care how big he is. He flicks on her light and she squints at us with tears streaming down her face. _Oh, Ana._

"Jesus, Ana," he flicks off the light and moves across her room to turn on her sidelight. I stand in the doorway so she can see I am there.

"What are you doing here?" her voice is a rasping gasp. It shocks me how much this is affecting her and I want very much to try on my rusty martial arts skills.

"Do you want me to throw this asshole out?" I ask. One chance, to just bury a well aimed knee in his groin. Just give me one chance.

Christian looks a little surprised and scared. _So you should be, you prick. _ Then Ana shakes her head. _Oh Christ, I am going to have to stand guard out here all night._ There is nothing I can do, as Elliot has said many times, they are grown ups, Ana is a grown up and right now she is consenting to his presence. But if I hear one thing that I can misconstrue as physical violence I will break this door down and tear him a new asshole.

"Just holler if you need me." I try to keep it light for Ana but threatening enough so that Christian knows. "Grey - you're on my shit list and I'm watching you." He looks surprised. _Good._ I pull the door closed but leave it ajar. The fucker can't get up to no good if he thinks I am sitting out here playing guard dog.

I hear them talking quietly but I can't hear what they are saying then Christian walks out to the kitchen where I am drinking my tea.

"Kate," _oh, so its Kate now?_ "do you have some advil? And a glass of water, please." He looks contrite. Silently I move around the kitchen getting what he needs. I hand them to him and he holds my hand for a moment looking into my eyes.

"I'm sorry." He whispers. And I can see that he really means it. He is so at a loss here and I can tell that this whole thing has shocked him more than any of us. _Oh Christian, if you feel even half for Ana of what Elliot feels for me then you have to fix this. Stop hurting her._

"Just make sure she knows that." I whisper. He looks at me and nods then releases my hand and goes back to Ana. This time he closes the door and I let him. I listen for a while but it seems pretty quiet in there. I pick up the phone and text Elliot.

_He's here._  
_Everything OK?_  
_Yeah. I think he's sorry._  
_OK, here if you need me._  
_OK, laters._  
_Luv u. Laters._


	18. Chapter 18

_******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**_

* * *

_**Lies, dripping off your mouth like dirt **_

_**Lies, lie in every step you walk **_

_**Lies, whispered sweetly in my ear **_

_**Lies, how do I get out of here? **_

_**Why, why you have to be so cruel? **_

_**Lies, lies, lies, I ain't such a fool**_

_**-Lies - The Rolling Stones-  
**_

* * *

My world has tilted on it's axis and the only person who can clear my thinking is the one person who doesn't trust the Grey's, my father. I need to know what he knows so after an hour or so of complete angst over what may or may not be happening in Ana's room I pick up the phone and call him. He and Mom are staying at the Heathman, rather than heading home to Seattle. I couldn't guarantee that this conversation would be private and this didn't make me feel any more confident. He picks up on the second ring.

"Daddy? It's me."

"Katie, what are you doing calling at this hour. Did something happen on the way home?" For all his bluff and blunder, my dad is a caring father. His concern is some comfort.

"No everything is fine. I wanted to thank you again for dinner." I am hedging, trying to build up to asking the questions I need to ask.

"Darling, your mother and I are so very proud of you and your brother. You did a brilliant job today. It was our very real pleasure to take you out and celebrate tonight." I can hear the smile in his voice. Proud, is probably an understatement for how he feels. I often wonder if it doesn't mean more to him than it does to me.

"Daddy, I need to ask you something." Hesitating for a moment I gather my courage through a deep breath. Here goes! "I need to know what you have on Christian and Elliot Grey."

I hear him exhale in a whistle. "To the point, huh?" I smile. "Kate, most of what I have is speculation and hearsay. Are you sure you want to know this when you have already invited Elliot to Barbados?"

No, no I am not sure but I need to know. "Dad, if there is something there isn't it better that I know what I could be letting myself in for?"

"Oh, Katie, I don't know. You are too invested in this boy."

"Daddy, please."

For a moment I think he is not going to tell me anything. We are both holding our breath waiting for the other to break. Then I hear a soft sigh.

"No Kate, what I will tell you is that I will back off this story until at least after Barbados and probably until you can sort out your feelings for Elliot Grey. I am not going to influence you in this but I will be watching him."

"Dad, you cannot use this family holiday to dig into Elliot's life. I won't have you spending our holiday trying to trip him up. On the other hand if there is something I need to know then I want you to tell me. Before Barbados."

"Katie, even I can tell your heart is committed already. If you want to know anything then you need to ask Elliot about his connection with Elena Lincoln and the Sirens Club. Ask him why the Grey brothers have been actively buying up shares in Lincoln Timber. Ask him about Christian's juvenile record and how that might possibly be linked to a physical assault on Linc Lincoln six years ago. There is some tie up with all of this that I can't prove and having met and done business with Christian a few times, I am not sure I want to. Not to mention the relationship we have with Mitchell, Wiley and Grey." _Shit, I had forgotten that Carrick Grey's law firm represents Kavanagh Media._ "But I will tell you this, Kavanagh Media are not the only ones digging into their pasts and if you care about him you might want to warn him about that."

_Shit!_ He has given me nothing and everything. After growing up in similar circles I know better than anyone that there is always dirt. Always something that you have to hide that has the potential to bite you on the ass. Christian Grey has more to lose than most so it wouldn't surprise me if there were others who want to bring him down. Right now that is not my concern, Ana is. But how to phrase this.

"Dad, just tell me one thing. Do you have any evidence that Christian Grey has ever hit a woman in anger? Has he ever been accused of or charged with physical assault on a woman?"

There is a sharp intake of breath on the other end of the phone. "No. I can honestly say that he has never been accused of or charged with assault on a female." There is hesitation in his voice and the next silence is speaking volumes. "Kate, he was there when Elena Lincoln was admitted to hospital after an aggravated assault six years ago. Eye witness accounts say that she claimed it was Linc who beat her but she refused to press charges. Christian brought her in to the hospital. Six weeks later Linc was assaulted in the car park of the Sirens Club but no one was ever charged with that either."

_Fuck._ Was Elena covering for Christian? He would have been, what? 21 years old? He has a record of suspensions from school for fighting, I know this from my own research but by all accounts that stopped around the age of 15 or 16. Linc Lincoln was beaten up around the same time as Elena. Damn. Either he was her assailant or her avenger and I don't really know which. Can Ana trust him?

Then Dad spoke again. "You might also want to ask him about Sirens. Your Elliot worked there eight years ago in the cover club. But that is a front for a special private membership club. Rumor has it that both Elena and Christian have been members of the private club for years."

The reach of Kavanagh Media never ceases to amaze me and I wonder if Dad already knows about the BDSM stuff. I am silent while I process all of this information.

My Dad breaks into my thoughts. "Sweetheart, there are only a few things we can actually prove yet. As I said most of it is conjecture and hearsay. You are a smart young woman and I know you will make an informed decision but you are going to have to get the rest from Elliot."

"If you trust me to do the right thing why did you warn him off?" I am concerned about everything that he is not prepared to tell me.

"Someone is drip feeding this information to us anonymously and they have been for the last year or so. Forgive me if I see the potential for fire when I am given the whiff of smoke. Your safety will always be my first priority and by approaching him directly I had hoped that Elliot would show his hand."

"By bowing out gracefully?"

"Something like that yes. The fact that he hasn't, that he is throwing himself into the dragon's mouth by agreeing to come to Barbados, especially after our phone conversation, says a lot about the man. Either he has nothing to hide or he is colossally stupid. I'd like to think that you would be smart enough to know the difference. I am actually hoping for the former. But if I get a sniff that any of this is going to damage you then understand that I won't hesitate to take him and his brother down."

"Daddy, I know and I am being careful. Please just let me handle this. Give me some time. But tell me, how did you even know about me and Elliot. We had only been seeing each other for a such a short time." I don't want to admit to my father exactly how fast I am falling for Elliot.

"That anonymous source sent me a photo of you and Elliot outside the Heathman. It was pretty obvious to me from that photo that something was going on."

Oh my God. Could the source be Jose? Even if this was the work of a spurned potential lover why would he be tracking the Grey's for the last year or so? None of it made any sense. Why would he be doing this? And how could he be getting the information about their past?

After I say goodnight and promise to call before the move on Saturday I take my laptop to my bedroom. Dad has given me some leads and I have a mountain of research to do before I will feel happy about Ana. Jose might stalking the Grey's but what possible grudge connection is there? Christian and Elliot also seems to be hatching some master plan to take over Lincoln Timber which amounts to destroying Linc Lincoln. Is this about his assault on Elena or is there some other motive? Christian has a violent past and there is a possibility that he was involved in the assaults of either or both of the Lincolns. Does that mean that he has the potential to be abusing Ana beyond a consensual BDSM relationship? Is Ana into BDSM too and how far is she prepared to let him go? Then it occurs to me, if Elliot worked at Sirens does that mean that he is into that lifestyle too and he just hasn't told me yet? I have no idea how Dad has got hold of the membership and employment records but I don't doubt the accuracy of what he has told me. Does this mean that Elliot is going to want to do this kinky sexual stuff with me?

The shock of that thought hits me in a sexual wave. Part of me is appalled and another part of me is deeply curious. What the hell is wrong with me? The feminist in me wants to recoil from it all in horror. The woman in me is turned on. Shit!

I lay awake for as long as I can listening for Ana. If she needs me I want to be able to get to her quickly, although thinking through some of my internet research tonight I am not sure I would recognize a _'No, please don't. Stop!' _from a _'No, __**please**__ don't stop!'_ and I wonder if there is a way I could find out what her safe word might be. Some time around 2am I drift off to sleep still in my jeans and t-shirt. My dreams are full of Christian and Elliot and they are both angry at me. It is unsettling and my sleep is both disturbed and disturbing.


	19. Chapter 19

_******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**_

* * *

_**Baby take off your coat Real slow **_

_**Take off your shoes I'll take off your shoes **_

_**Baby, take off your dress Yes, yes, yes **_

_**You can leave your hat on**_

_**-You Can Leave Your Hat On - Joe Cocker-  
**_

* * *

Christian is racing to get out of the apartment the next morning when I walk out of my room. I look at him with a blank expression. After last night's revelations I neither like nor hate him right now but he is obviously someone I am going to have to get along with on some level. For both Ana's and Elliot's sakes. He is hopping trying to get his shoes on and he stops at the hall mirror and fumbles with his tie. I put down the cup of tea I am drinking and wander over to take it out of his hand.

"You sort everything out, Grey?" He shudders back from my touch as I go to put the tie on him. I pause and shrug. "I'm not going to molest you." He closes his eyes for a moment then nods. I manage to secure the Windsor knot without touching him at all. He looks down at the tie and then at me.

"Thanks." He whispers. "Kate, I do care about her." _Care enough to smack her into submission? Maybe I should show you how much I care._

"Yeah, well you've got a funny way of showing it, Christian." I try for just a _hint_ of anger rather than the whole Kate Kavanagh spectrum. I can see that he gets my meaning but there is still that hardness in his eyes, trying to warn me off. _Not in this lifetime, Grey._

Then he says something that stops me in my tracks. "Please, take care of her for me. I can't see her until Saturday." He looks pained at that thought. _Very telling Mr Grey. You care more than you are letting on._

"I will but not for you. I just wonder who is going to do that when I am not around? You know I am going away for two weeks. What happens then? Are you going to hurt her more because I'm not here?" He looks shocked and guilty. Like he has his hand caught in a cookie jar. I am not giving anything else away.

"I am hoping that by Saturday, Ana and I will both know where we stand. She will have all the power and protection she wants. You have my word." Something in his body language changes and it is kind of eerie to watch. "Good day Katherine."

Back to Katherine, huh? "Good day, Sir." He shoots me a startled look quickly then it is gone and so is he. I wonder what will change by Saturday. _Shit, she is going to sign a contract!_ Part of me is curious enough to go and raid her computer but I don't want to betray her trust. _Of course, that is why he as teched her up! __Otherwise all of this stuff would be on my computer. Smart move, Grey._

* * *

Ana goes off to her last day of work in her new Audi A3 that Christian has bought for her. I am all for her not driving Wanda the deathtrap any more but giving her a car seems really over the top. Of course, my apartment, my car, my clothes all come courtesy of my very over generous father so who am I to talk. _Who's your daddy, Ana?_ By the time she gets home she has a blackberry as well and I choke back all my smart comments about Christian the control freak. I think Christian might have some strange stalkerish ideas about her safety and needs but I have to hand it to him, he is trying.

Going through all the ways he shows he cares in my head, I make a list. So far he has rescued her from being run over by a bike, rescued her from drunk molestation outside a bar (up until last night I hadn't seen Jose as a threat but now I am not so sure), bought her clothes, a phone, a computer, Very expensive first edition classic literature and a much safer car than she has ever driven before including mine. He watches her like a hawk, he has taken her to Seattle, to dinner, to coffee. He has met her dad and she has met his mom. Whatever kinky secrets he is keeping she seems to know at least something about them.

I suspect that he has also introduced her to a darker side of sex and taken things a little too far. Far enough to not only physically but emotionally hurt her and my head is wrestling with which one is worse. She has shed more than a few tears but at least he is moving heaven and earth to make sure she is okay when he does fuck up, isn't he?. The problem is it feels very much like he is trying to control _every_ aspect of her world. How would that feel? More importantly how can I shake it up? Not that I want to see Ana hurt but he seems to want all of this without the type of commitment that Ana wants and deserves. Is he even capable of it?

Then there is all this other stuff, including someone trying to destroy his world and perhaps Elliot too. Maybe I should cut him some slack as far as Ana is concerned. I want to ask Ana how she feels about it all but I get the feeling that she is not ready to talk. Maybe in two weeks, when I get back from Barbados, she might feel more relaxed about it all. Maybe she will have decided to move on from Christian Grey.

There are so many questions in my head, about Elliot, Christian, Ana...all I can do right now is keep my ears and mind open. I know that Elena Lincoln seems to be key to a lot of shit in their lives and I am going to have to tread carefully if I want to find anything out. What my heart tells me though is that Ana and Christian have a genuine, if somewhat kinky connection and that Elliot at least thinks he is being sincere. Is that enough? Right now it will have to be but we all have a long way to go.

* * *

We are still packing that evening when there is a knock on the door. Ana goes to answer and that guy Taylor, the chauffeur/bodyguard, is on the doorstep. A light bulb goes off for me? Taylor, could this be the Jason that Elliot talked about? He is here to pick up Wanda and dispose of her which makes him okay in my book. Ana gets the keys and they head to the car. I am curious so I stand at the door, out of sight, listening. Eavesdropping is not a cool look but he works for Christian. Surely that makes him open territory.

Ana is chatting to him by the car and asks how long he has been working for Christian. Four years. This must be Jason.

"He's a good man, Miss Steele." I hear him say. Why do I hear that description of him a lot? I move back inside before they see me.

Later Jose turns up with takeout and we sit down to watch tv for what will be the last time. The three musketeers are breaking up and it is bittersweet. Partly because it is the end of an era and mostly because now I don't know if he is behind the photo that was sent to my father. Dad has emailed me the photograph but I haven't had more than a brief look. When Ana goes to the kitchen to open another bottle of wine I collar him.

"Jose, I need to ask you if you took this photo?" Holding up my phone to him I wait while he studies it.

"Kate, I took photos of you and Grey but I was sitting in the car. These look like they have been taken from across the street - see..." He holds the screen back to me and I can immediately see what he is talking about. "Where did you get this from?"

"Some stalker sent it to my Dad at the paper." I shrug taking the phone back.

"And you thought it was me?" Poor Jose, he looks disappointed and hurt.

"I'm sorry, I guess I was just thrown by it. If it is any consolation I really hoped that it wasn't you." My humiliated blush has spread down to my toes. _Way to ruin a friendship, Kate._ Ana walks back in the room and we drop the subject quickly but I somehow think that I may have done irreparable damage.

We go back to watching tv when there is a knock at the door and I get up to answer it. Elliot fairly bursts through as soon as the door opens and sweeps me up into his arms, making me laugh.

He looks at me for a second then plants a very hot and intense kiss on my mouth while moving me into a Hollywood style dip. _Oh my, this man is something else._ I hear the uncomfortable silence from the couch as we unclinch ourselves and look at them to smile.

Next thing I know Jose and Ana have left the apartment in search of the bar to give us some privacy. _What kind of friend am I?_ A horny, in lust friend I guess is the answer. Elliot picks me up and walks over to the couch to sit down. I curl up in his lap and stroke his five o'clock shadow. This man is so gorgeous in all of his many states. He turns to kiss me and after a while he lays me down on the couch and eases himself out to lie on top of me. We kiss like horny teenagers, for a long time and it feels so good... although it is tainted by the million questions I want to ask him.

"Are you even going to say hello?" I ask, coming up for air ten minutes later. His grin is infectious.

"Hello." He smiles and strokes my face and then kisses my jaw and neck.

"Elliot. Stop." I laugh and push him up so that we are sitting upright facing each other on the couch.

"What? What did I do?" He asks, looking genuinely confused.

"You did nothing. But there has to be more to us than just hot, horny sex, and what are you doing here anyway?"

"I came up to move you tomorrow. Remember?" He looks confused. Obviously, he always planned on coming up tonight and staying over to get an early start. He just forgot to tell me. _Men._

"Okay. Thanks for sharing the finer details of your plan. How do you know I don't have my hot Spanish lover here waiting for me in my bed?" I ask teasing him. His eyes go wide and he is up on his feet.

"Where is the fucker?" He storms through the apartment. _Shit, he thinks I'm serious._ So I run after him and just as I catch up with him in the hall outside my room he spins with a big grin on his face and tackles me around the legs throwing me over his shoulders and carting me into my room, laughing.

"Neanderthal." I smack him on the back to let him know I am not pleased. He smacks me on the bum and then throws me down on the bed.

"Mmmm...wo-man." He grunts at me in his best caveman voice and then launches himself onto the bed. I roll away just as he lands and scramble to my feet on the bed panting. He stays in his prone position and groans as if he has hurt himself. "Ohhhhhhh"

_Oh no. _ "Baby, are you okay. Did you hurt anything?" I am down on my knees beside him trying to check out his body parts when he rolls grabbing me around the waist and drags me onto his stomach. I scream and swat him with my hand which he grabs and holds at a distance from his body. I am struggling to push it back toward him but he is so strong and I can't get any leverage.

"Feisty Miss K." He grinds out through clenched teeth. I try throwing all my weight into moving my arm but get nowhere. Then he rolls me onto my back and pins my arms above my head kissing me passionately. I clamp my lips closed but he forces his tongue inside so I bite gently. _Oh, I like this game._ He lifts up to look into my eyes as if he is checking if I am okay. I smile to reassure him. Then he reaches over the bed and pulls the belt out of my dressing gown which is hanging on the post of my bed. He shifts me up and ties my wrists firmly to the bed head. I only put up the slightest resistance but mostly I am helping him by shuffling my body into place.

"Kate, are you okay with this?" he asks so gently and it makes me feel safe. If this is the type of role play game he is into, it is fine with me. I really want this. Nodding enthusiastically with wide eyes, he seems to accept my decision and begins what I can only call an all out assault on my body. Using his tongue and lips he licks and kisses down my jaw and neck while undoing my shirt. He pauses to look when he discovers I am not wearing a bra.

"You have the most beautiful breasts, Katie." He sounds almost reverent as he worships them with his hands and his mouth, kneading and sucking them. My nipples become hard little nubs. I am so needy and my body is squirming until he places a heavily muscled leg between mine and firmly anchors my hips in place. "Keep still baby."

He runs his tongue down to my stomach, gently tracing his palms down to my waist. His face is a study in passion as he licks around my naval leaving a sensual trail. Languid kisses are peppered across my torso as he undoes my jeans. I toe off my shoes to help out. Sliding down my body he slowly removes my pants kissing my thighs, knees and calves as he goes. Lifting my leg he licks behind my knee sending me into a sensual spasm. Now I am mostly naked and he is fully clothed which doesn't seem quite right.

"You're turn Grey. Give me the 'full monty'." His eyes light up as he gets the reference and he disappears out to the living room. I am lying there trussed up and waiting when he reappears with the ipod dock and a cowboy hat that was hanging in the hallway. I don't know whether to laugh or not as I recognize the opening strains of _You Can Leave Your Hat On_ explode from the speakers. He dons the stetson looking all Brad Pitt in _Thelma and Louise_ as he slowly unbuttons his shirt and strips it off. _Oh my, you can really move_ and I am mesmerized by his thrusting hips. My tongue involuntarily snakes out to lick my lips and I'm in a slow burn of want, waiting for him to come back to me but he just keeps on dancing. He moves a chair into the center of the floor and begins the agonizingly sensual task of dry humping it, first facing me and then straddling it to lean into an extended back bend that has his abs rippling. His body is a study in ripped and toned muscle with the only thing missing being a lathering of coconut oil. _Fuck, you are so hot! _

Walking over to me he unties my hands then lifts my body easily moving me to the chair and tying me back up with my arms behind my back. All the while he is strutting around like a carefully choreographed male stripper and I think I am going to spontaneously combust. He stands close to me before straddling my thighs in a deep plie and stroking down his own thighs. I am fairly sure that I am dripping cream all over the seat and he is so good I want to scream like one of those sad women at a male strip club.

With his crotch firmly planted in front of my face he slowly unbuttons his jeans and slides down the zipper and I swear I could come just watching. My tongue snakes out as he holds the flap open to one side and then the other, letting me see his boxers underneath. He grinds a couple of times into my face and I kiss his hard cock through the denim while he holds my head. Then he steps back and strips them right off.

The rest of his body is as ripped with muscle as his back and stomach. He is all bronze skin and fair hair and simply delicious to watch. I am biting my lip hard trying not to lose control. He turns around and straddles me again but with his butt in my face and I can't resist the chance to rub my face across his firm cheeks. I try to grab his boxers with my teeth but he moves away, turning and then moves in, front on, for me to try again. This time he lets me succeed and I gingerly try to pull down his shorts with my teeth. He laughs.

Sitting down on my lap, with one hand he palms down my body and I arch into his hand. He steps away again and moving to the music he drags his hands down my thighs which I have firmly clamped together to stop myself from exploding. His intentions are clear when his face is down at hip level and I snap my thighs open so that he is staring straight at my hot wet folds dripping on the seat. His eyes pop and then he tips his head back to look at me.

"Can I help you with that, mam?" He smirks up at me in his best Texan accent. I smile.

"Oh, why yes, Sir," I reply in a Southern drawl, "I should think a big strong cowboy like yourself might be help me out." I bat my eyelids at him and he smiles looking directly at my nether regions with hunger.

"Yes mam, I think I have just the thing for that." And then his fingers thrust inside me as he kisses me. God it feels so good and I lift up and writhe against his touch trying to give him more. Meanwhile my hands have come free of the tie and I shake it off lifting my arms to stroke his back. Reaching over, I pull his shorts down to reveal his firm, proud erection. I bend quickly to give it a lick and he doesn't remove his fingers from me.

Swiftly, he picks me up off the chair and then turns around to sit down in my place and I slide down on top of him taking his shaft straight into my body. We are both so ready it is incredible and within a few short thrusts we both come hard and fast screaming out each others name.

Right now, all thoughts of my father's investigations are forgotten, as are my reservations about Christian and Ana. There is only me and Elliot and my heart going a hundred miles a minute. I don't want to fall in love so fast but what I see in his eyes, feel in his touch - it is almost too hard to resist. Almost.


	20. Chapter 20

******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**Now that we are moving to Seattle with this story line I figure it is time to hear from Elliot. Not sure how long I will play with his POV but I am looking forward to getting to Barbados. Thanks again for the encouraging reviews. **

**Once more these characters and the story belong to EL James. I am just messing with their heads!**

**_Moving, keep on moving _**

**_Where I feel I'm home again _**

**_And when it's over _**

**_I'll see you again_**

**_-Moving - Supergrass  
_**

* * *

Making love to Kate is like a balm to my soul. She is all fire, hot, unpredictable, scorching and dangerous. Then she is water, smooth, calm, cool and flowing carrying me along with her tide. She makes me feel playful, a risk taker, challenging all her expectations and mine. I want to make her laugh. I want to make her want me.

There has never been a shortage of women in my life and I have seen enough of life to be a cynic about love but somehow she makes me want to believe. Believe that I can have something close to what my parents have. That I am good enough for her to rely on and stay beside. That I am capable of being faithful to her cos since I met her the thought of being with anyone else just leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

When I wake early in the morning she is draped across my body like a warm soft blanket. Her hair is a tousled mess and I brush it out of her face tracing a lazy pathway across her skin. Stretching along my body I can tell she is resisting opening her eyes but when she does she is smiling at me with a sleepy gaze. Her jade green eyes shine through and touch mine making me smile.

"Hey beautiful." Part of me has always felt that 'beautiful' is an empty word I could just throw about but somehow it doesn't sound so empty when I describe her. In fact, it really doesn't do her justice and there aren't enough ways to describe how gorgeous this creature is snuggled into my side. She takes my breath away.

"Hey. What time is it?" Stifling a sleepy yawn she looks around for the bedside clock. I reach over and grab my watch off the nightstand to take a look.

"Five." I say, placing it back down. She groans, rolling away from me and covering her eyes.

"Too early." Kate's a night owl and long nights of lazy love making she can cope with but she doesn't seem to do mornings very well. I figure she'll need at least another hour or so of sleep so I roll her over on her side tucking my arm around her, our bodies spooning.

"Go back to sleep, I'll wake you in an hour." I murmur kissing her hair and in seconds she is napping again.

I, on the other hand, _am_ a morning person so by the time she wakes again I have already been up, showered and gone out for breakfast.

"Hey sleepyhead." I wave the takeout coffee under her nose to tempt her awake. She rolls on to her back with her arm across her eyes. A pert pair of pouty lips is all I can see and I resist the urge to kiss them.

"Go away. It's too early." Her voice is a husky groan that sounds so sexy. That voice alone could entice me back to bed but we have work to do. Placing the food on the bedside table to free up my hands I reach around her waist, hauling her into a sitting position. I ignore her little unhappy squeal as I prop the spare pillows up behind her. I grab a cup and hold it out to her.

"You don't have to look so damn hot in the morning, Grey! Not when I probably look like shit!" _Oh Katie, if you could see yourself through my eyes._

"Come on sleeping beauty. Time to wake up and smell the coffee." She gives me an eat-shit-and-die look then with a grumpy harrumph snatches the cup from my hand. Apart from being mad that she won't take a compliment from me, her mood doesn't phase me. I've lived with Mia Trevelyan-Grey for most of her life, Kate is a breeze compared to my baby sister. "We need to get going. The truck is going to be here in fifteen minutes and I don't think I want any of my guys trying to load this bed with you still naked in it."

She gives a yelp and kicks the blankets off her legs. "Shit, Elliot, why didn't you warn me you had organized a moving crew!" Pushing her back down I cover her up again. _Breathe Kate._

"Calm down. They can load all of the stuff that's ready in the lounge while you are in the shower. They will probably be on the road before you are even out. I can load all of your clothes and personal bathroom stuff into my truck and we can make a leisurely convoy to Seattle."

"What about Ana?" She asks, blowing on her hot coffee.

"She is already up and dressed. We have moved her boxes out of her room already so she is mostly ready to go. I will get her on the road so she can meet the truck at the apartment and let them in." She frowns at me. _Now what?._

"You know, that's my job." Now I'm frowning. _What the hell is she talking about?_ She peers at me from under her eyelashes. "I am the one who organizes everything... Bosses everyone about. I don't do dominant men, Grey, its not my style."

_Shit, I'll take that challenge._ My alpha male kicks in as I take her cup out of her hand and put it down on the table. Then I push her down on the bed and climbs over her pinning her arms beneath my hands. Leaning in for a long lingering kiss I slowly pull away to look at her but without releasing her hands. She's locked down I remind her with my body that I have all the control here.

"Get up Miss Kavanagh, before I truss you like a hog and throw you in the tray of my ute." I whisper in her ear. Then I haul her to her feet, turn her around and swat her hard on her behind. She moves away with a yelp. "Now!" I yell, and she runs giggling to the bathroom.

* * *

Three hours later I am installing the entertainment center I have bought Kate and Ana as a housewarming present in their new living room with Kate sitting on the floor at my feet sorting CD s and DVDs into a shelving unit. I pick up the drill and begin fixing a bracket to the wall for the TV. Looking down at her I frown.

"Baby, you might want to find something to cover that stuff up and move out of the way." I keep measuring up to find the right location. There is a pause where she doesn't move and I raise an eyebrow. Suddenly she looks up at me like a reprimanded school girl and immediately gets up to do what I ask. Compliant Kate is an interesting concept, kinda hot really. But she can't help her true nature kicking in.

"Do you even know what you're doing with that thing?" She calls over her shoulder with a sultry teasing look. _Not completely compliant, huh?_ Then she turns and starts walking backwards, taunting me by poking out her tongue. _So fucking, cute, Miss K. _"I mean, it looks awfully complicated and how can I trust you not to damage my walls." She winks at me picking up a sheet to throw over the shelf. _Very, cute._

I turn back to the wall to measure and mark. "Woman, this is what I do. I don't expect your puny mind to be able to take in the finer points of masonry and loads but I think you can trust me to have this covered." I smirk back at her. "Now let me do my work." She gets too close and I take the opportunity to swat her for the second time today. Damn, I want to take her over my knee right now and I feel some empathy towards my brother for a moment. _Cheeky women._

Within twenty minutes the TV is installed and I have it all hooked up and working.

"See baby, easy." I grin at them as she falls back on the couch with Ana. _Damn, is that the time. _I start to pack up my gear. "I'd love to stay baby but my sister is back from Paris. It's a compulsory family dinner tonight." And I really don't want to leave but I have to go.

"Can you come by after?" She looks shy. I know how she hates coming across as needy but it makes me feel warm inside. When she does that I know that I am slowly breaking down her defensive wall.

"I'll see if I can escape," Knowing that I will be back as soon as my family allows me to leave. She smiles and offers to walk me out.

"Laters, Ana." I give her a wink as I follow Kate out of the room. As a big brother, I feel it is my duty to tease Ana a bit about Christian but she is tense. Christian has her walking on eggshells and I can't help but feel guilty that Kate and I have it so easy. Of course, she still hasn't said the 'L' word to me but I think she is getting closer and closer every second. Ana told Kate about meeting Mom at Christian's apartment and how awkward that was. She doesn't seem to know where she stands in the relationship which I understand. What sort of relationship starts with NDA's, due diligence research and behavior contracts? I sense that she wants something more from him than this 'agreement' he is so keen to offer but he isn't budging. Yet. I think that he will and I just hope that he does by the time we get back from Barbados. Given the depth of emotion I have caught a glimpse of in the past week I can't help but feel he just needs time.

Kate on the other hand wants to give them a push. I don't really agree with her tactics but I have an idea, "Katie, do you and Ana have plans tonight?" She turns to me as we emerge out of the building into a cool but sunny day.

"Just takeout and wine I would imagine. Why?" She lifts her hand up to shade her pretty green eyes from the sun as she looks up at me.

"Nothing yet, but I'll give you a call in an hour or so." I can see the question in her eyes but I shut her down by leaning down for a kiss. I can't help but wrap her up in my arms as she moves in close to me. Her arms slip around my waist and her tongue slips in my mouth. People are looking at us as we make out on the sidewalk and quite frankly I don't give a damn. An elderly lady walks past us and pauses turning around to stare at us in disgust. I drop her into another one of my patented Hollywood dips, kissing her passionately before lifting my head and looking at the woman.

"Enjoying the show?" I smile at her. She harrumphs but I see a twinkle in her eye as she shuffles off muttering something about getting a room. Kate giggles into my shoulder as I rights her.

"I gotta go. Laters baby." Pecking her once more on the lips before moving off. I listen for the words that never come and a little piece of my heart shrivels. Burned again by the silence.

* * *

"Hey, baby girl, how was your flight?" I am standing at the door of my sister's bedroom leaning on the door frame. She shrieks and runs towards me throwing herself into my arms. I laugh and give her a big bear hug. She is still all legs and arms but in the three years since she has been in Paris she has become all woman. I worry for the male population of Seattle now that Miss Mia is back state-side.

"Elliot, so great to see you." She steps back a little to look at me with her huge brown eyes and full-lipped smile. "You look wonderful. Different. What's going on?" There is no hiding anything from Mia. She may not ever have a good handle on her own love life but she can be very perceptive about other people and right now it seems that she has honed in on my happiness. _How much to say?_

"I need to ask you a favor." She is eyeing me with suspicion from under a thick black fringe and takes her time to respond. I am trying to be still under her gaze. _Don't give to much away._

"Okay, Lelliot. Shoot." She says finally. _ Where to begin._ If I say too much then Christian is likely to hear her shriek all the way from Bellevue to Escala. But quite frankly, he needs her help and so do I._ Here goes._

"Look Coco, I know this is your first night back and you probably were looking forward to a quiet family dinner but ... I need you to convince Mom to invite Christian's new girlfriend." Luckily the G word has trumped her distaste of her hated nick name, the one that Christian and I gave her the minute she got her scholarship to Lenotre in Paris. Her eyes widen with shock.

"I knew it." she exclaims smacking me on the chest. "I knew he was keeping something from me. Damn. Christian really has a girlfriend?" She has backed away and sits down on the edge of her bed in shock. I move into her room closing the door behind me and sit down beside her.

"Yeah, only I am not sure that he knows that is what he has." She gives me a confused look. "I think he needs a little push." Her head tilts to the side as she considers this and then she nods.

"I see. So you think bringing her dinner tonight, and introducing her to Mom and Dad will force him to admit it."

"Well, technically she has already met Mom but yeah, that is the general idea." Her mouth drops open.

"Mom knows and she didn't tell me?" She stares at me in disbelief. Oh boy, I don't know if Mom or Christian is in more trouble. One thing my sister doesn't do is secrets. She is hopeless at keeping them and hellishly good at getting them out of people.

"I wouldn't take it personally. I think Mom doesn't want to jinx it. Which is why we need to get her to invite Ana tonight. But I wanted to check with you first. It is your night after all."

"Oh, Elliot, of course. Let's go talk to her." She hustles me straight out of the room and we head downstairs to find our mother who is arranging flowers in the kitchen. She looks up as we enter, Mia dragging me behind her with an excited giggle.

"Mom, we have a request for dinner." Giving our mother her best Mia smile she leans over the kitchen bench to look up at her as she nonchalantly steals a grape off the platter Mom is preparing. "Can you call Christian and invite Ana, is that her name Elliot?" I nod, " yes, invite Ana to dinner tonight for my welcome home. Please."

Mom stares at her with her mouth open then glares at me. "Elliot, what is going on? Why are you two plotting against your brother?" I can tell that she is angry and worried. Worried that any interference from the family will cause Christian to drive Ana away. This is why I have to throw myself on the sword, for Christian, for Ana and I guess in some ways for me and Kate.

"Mom, hear me out." I take a deep breath, here goes. "I've met someone. Someone I really care about. In fact, I am going away with her and family for a holiday next week." Now both Mia and Mom are looking at me as if I have grown horns. Shit. "Her name is Kate and I met her through Christian. She is Ana's flatmate. Which is why I need you to invite Ana tonight, Mom. Kate and I are going away on Tuesday and I want you to meet her before we go. I just know that she will feel better if Ana is here, after all Ana and Christian met first. Kate just thinks its weird that she would meet you guys before Ana does."

I look from one to the other while they take this in. Only some of it is stretching the truth. I do want Kate to meet my family, especially if we are going away together. The problem is that now they both know exactly how important she is to me. My one claim to fame in this family is that no girlfriend has crossed the threshold of my parents house since I dated Lisa Maxwell back in high school. Inviting Kate tonight is a big deal. I just hope that she doesn't want to lynch by the time she has had the Mia treatment this evening.

"Oh. My. God. Elliot," Mia shrieks, "you didn't mention a Kate. I thought this was about Christian. When...how did you meet her? What does she do? How serious is this? When were you going to tell me? No wait. I knew there was something up with you. Damn you're good. Throwing me off the scent like that."

She has hardly stopped to take a breath through that whole rant and I just laugh at her. That is my baby sister. Sharp, beautiful, stylish and a megawatt bundle of energy in stilettos and tight skirts. I can just imagine all of that in French, she must have driven the boys of Paris mad.

"As I said, Kate is Ana's flatmate. She was meant to interview Christian for the college paper which she edited up until graduation last week. Only she got sick and sent Ana which is how Christian met her first. Christian roped me in to help him get some time alone with Ana by looking after Kate and well..." They are fairly salivating with hunger for more details. _Damn rabid women. _ I take a deep breath and continue. "Kate has a degree in literature and professional writing, she is starting her internship at Kavanagh Media when she returns from Barbados. She is smart, funny, beautiful and well...I really like her. A lot."

I pause to let them take all of this in. Mia is leaning on her hands gazing up at me with a big cheesy grin. "Mom, I think your boy is _in-lurve_." She gives me a wink and heaven help me I think I might even be blushing.

"Mia don't tease your brother." Mom walks around the bench towards me and wraps her arms around me. "I can't believe this. Both my boys." There is a hint of a tear in her eyes. "I can't tell you how happy I am for you darling." I hug her back giving Mia a glare over her shoulder.

"Thanks Mom." I say. "Now, how about that call to Christian."

Next thing Mom has Christian on the phone and has issued her invitation. We are all holding our collective breaths waiting for him to say yes. Once he does I take out my phone and speed dial Kate.


	21. Chapter 21

_******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**_

* * *

_**I told that girl that my prospects were good **_

_**And she said, "Baby, it's understood **_

_**Working for peanuts is all very fine **_

_**But I can show you a better time" **_

_**Baby, you can drive my car **_

_**Yes, I'm gonna be a star **_

_**Baby, you can drive my car **_

_**And maybe I'll love you**_

_**-Drive My Car - The Beatles  
**_

* * *

Nervousness is flowing off Kate in waves when I arrive back at her place that afternoon so I immediately take her out to distract her from the night ahead. We head out to the market to buy wine and a few groceries that Mom has asked us to pick up. Walking around holding her hand feels pretty damn good, especially when I can lift it to my mouth for soft kiss every now and then. I love women, I love everything about them and I love being physically close to them. Kate just raises the bar on my pleasure. Being close and physical with her is both electric and addictive.

Unlike most guys I know, I actually enjoy browsing; shopping for clothes, music, food, furniture... I don't think I'm particularly vain or metro but I like nice things and I like to look good but I think I also like the thrill of the bargain hunt and being able to take control of my choices. Window shopping seems to take on a whole new life with Kate at my side. We argue over everything; prices, aesthetics, economics, fair trade. She revs me up and pisses me off like no other person I know and I wonder if I will ever remember what my life was like before I met her.

That first day at the Heathman was nuts. If anyone had asked me if I believed in love at first sight I would have laughed. Romance has always been a means to an end. A mutually satisfying end, but the key word was always 'end'. Women came and went, I knew what they wanted to hear and I could talk my way into pretty much any girl's bed. I never took it seriously and for the most part neither did they.

Kate hit me like a Mack truck and from the moment I set eyes on her I knew I wasn't remotely prepared to love and leave her. Yeah, she is sexy as all hell so what red-blooded man wouldn't want to get into her pants but that wasn't the first thing I noticed about her. In fact it wasn't so much what I noticed about her but what I felt in me. Possessive. So I don't know about love at first sight but I now whole-heartedly believe in 'mine' at first sight.

Then when she threw down that challenge. The one where there would be no 'us', well, that was red rag to a bull. A very horny bull by that stage. There was no way she was not going to be with me, no way that there wasn't going to be an 'us'. It is not the thrill of the chase, or her attempt at unavailability. I have had that from other women and it leaves me cold. It was like she knew me, saw past all the shit and the posturing to the man and then went straight past taking me on at my own game to someone I just knew I couldn't live without. From that point on it has been about biding my time and convincing her. I am still convincing her, one family member at a time.

"I need to buy some flowers for your mother. I don't suppose you know what colors she likes?" Her body language says that she doesn't really expect an answer as she inspects the flower stall.

"The amethyst and cream calla lilies," I reply pointing to a tall fresh bouquet. Kate looks at me in shock. "What? She's my mother, I know what she likes."

Smiling, she makes the purchase quickly. "They just happen to be my favourite too." Her eyes are sparkling jade looking up at me. _Why did I know that about you?_

Back at her apartment we have lots of time to make love before getting ready to go out. I put a great deal of time and effort into her pleasure hoping it will take the edge off her nerves. Unfortunately it always seems to leave me wanting more.

"You wanna take my car?" She is standing in the kitchen watching me load up the shopping bags from the refrigerator. Demurely dressed in floral print skirt, black tank and cardigan with sexy patent red peep toe heels that show off the shape of her beautiful legs, she gives off the fresh-faced girl next door vibe. Very sexy girl next door.

"Wouldn't you prefer me to drive tonight? You may want to have a couple of drinks." I am sure that she will need something to relax.

"What, you not man enough to drive me car, Grey? I suppose she might be more than you can handle." _Very funny, Miss K._ The thought of driving her sports car appeals.

"Oh, I think I've got what it takes. A little finesse and a firm hand." She giggles and it is so fucking sexy.

"Don't underestimate her, Mr Grey. She's a woman after all. Probably more than you have ever had to cope with." Kate prowls towards me trying to fain innocence.

"We're not talking about your car any more, are we?" I ask all wide-eyed, like I have no idea what she is talking about. She shakes her head and laughs.

"Come on, stud. Let's see if you can make her purr."

"Have no doubts about my ability on that count, Miss Kavanagh." Picking up the bags we head down to the car park.

The Mercedes sports is a sweet little motor that suits Kate to a tee. Sleek, racy, classy and expensive but she makes you feel pretty hot when you're cruising along inside her. I love it and can't resist singing Drive My Car all the way up the Interstate to my parents house just to piss her off. She takes it good-naturedly but the tension returns to her body as we get closer to Bellevue.

We sweep into the driveway around 7pm to see my mom smiling at us as she waits on the doorstep with Dad standing behind her. A doubtful look sweeps across Kate's face as I gather up the bags and flowers and shepherd her up to the door.

"Don't be nervous baby, they are going to love you." I just hope that **_she_** likes **_them_**. Looking far from relaxed, she plasters a big fake grin on her face as she walks up the steps to meet them, her hand wrapped around my arm in a death grip. _WTF?_

"Mom, Dad, this is Kate Kavanagh. Kate, my mom, Grace Trevelyan-Grey and my dad, Carrick Grey." Uncharacteristically, my mom throws formality out the door by pulling Kate into a hug. I stifle a grin. My dad looks at me and raises a bemused eyebrow.

"Kate it is so lovely to meet you. Thank you for coming along tonight at such short notice." Mom is smiling at us with such warmth and I can see it take effect. Kate finally seems to relax.

"Thank you so much for inviting me, Dr Trevelyan-Grey." Now her smile is more genuine. More the girl I love. "These are for you." She hands Mom the flowers.

"Oh Kate, they are beautiful, thank you. Please, call us Grace and Carrick. Come in, let's get you some champagne." Mom might be gushing effusively but it has had the effect of drawing Kate in and relaxing her. There is genuine emotion. Poor Mom, she probably thought she would never see us with serious girlfriends, never mind where my mind is heading. As far as Kate is concerned I'm picking out schools for the kids already. Christian and Ana are going to be a bigger deal since Mom has never seen him with a female let alone a real life girlfriend. I know he is going to be pretty damn tense when he arrives. I imagine Kate and Christian having one of their tense, snarky standoffs. _Fucking great. Christian better fucking chill tonight otherwise I might have to kick his ass. _

We follow them inside and I keep a reassuring hand in the small of Kate's back. If her nerves kick in again I want to be close. I watch her taking in the house with its wide sweeping staircase and large chandeliers and mirrors. The exquisite artworks around the walls and the decor are pretty much Bellevue tasteful classic. It is what I grew up with but nothing like my place. Of course, Kate hasn't seen my house yet but I plan on changing that later. A little frown plays across her face.

"What's the matter?" I ask in a low voice. _Too much, too soon?_ She has me worried with all the things she doesn't say.

"Nothing," she mutters, "I'll tell you later." I try to shrug it off as I head out to the kitchen. Dad hands us glasses of champagne once I have dumped the bags on the bench in front of Gretchen, the housekeeper. Raising my glass to Kate doesn't eliminate the doubt writ large in her eyes. _Fuck, she's got me anxious and I don't do anxious._

Just then Mia comes bounding down the staircase, "Lelliot!" It comes out like a girlie squeal as she throws her arms around my neck and without taking a breath turns and throws her arms around Kate. "You must be Kate. Gosh you're beautiful." _Fuck, slow down Mia. _ Kate's face is priceless as Mia grabs my glass of champagne and skulls it down with a giggle. "Thanks Lelliot!" She grins then grabs Kate's hand and drags her through to the lounge. Kate looks back over her shoulder and mouths, '_Lelliot'_? All I can do is shake my head and laugh as we all follow them through the door.

"I'll tell you later." I murmur following in the wake of hurricane Mia.

Kate and I settle onto a couch together, our bodies drawn to each other like magnets. Mia perches on the arm of the couch next to me holding her glass out to Dad for a refill. Mom is still standing looking at us with a big grin as Dad does the honors. I can never be in the same space with Kate without needing to touch her in some way so I throw an arm behind her shoulder so I can play with her hair, her neck, her ear. _Yeah, you're like a fucking horny teenager, Grey._

"So Elliot tells us you are both going on a holiday to Barbados next week. How does your family feel about him imposing himself on you?" _Jesus, thanks Dad. _ Dad tops up Kate's glass with a serious look. He's doing that assessing the enemy thing that he does. The same one Christian brings into every business negotiation. The intent stare is unsettling. _What's up your ass, old man?_

"No one expects the Spanish Inquisition." Kate mumbles quietly, as she places her glass on the coffee table in front of her and I have to stop myself from bursting out with laughter at the reference. Mia giggles next to us. Yet, another thing we have in common? She looks up at my Dad with a smile.

"My family are thrilled that Elliot is coming along. My mother had this trip booked a couple of months ago. An opportunity for my brother and I to take a well-earned break before I start my internship and he starts grad school." Kate replies smoothly. She recognizes 'the look' too but doesn't let Dad throw her even though I can feel her body tense up. Randomly, I realize it reminds me of the look every ex gets as they size up the woman currently on my arm at functions. I know a few of them who might get a little pissed that I am off the market. Man, I can't wait to go public with Kate.

"Oh, what is he going to study?" Mom asks. At least I can rely on Mom to be genuinely interested. She doesn't seem to see Kate as any sort of threat. She does, however, throw a slightly pissy look at Dad. _Good._

"Psychology, if he can get accepted into the Masters program." _Christian will have a fucking field day with that one._ Once more I am struck by all things we don't talk about. Like her brother, Ethan. Thank God I have two weeks in paradise with her to catch up on family histories.

"So he is not going into the family business, then?" Dad asks and I almost choke. _Shit, how does Dad know what Kate's family does?_ "I have met your father before Kate. I specialize in media law and my firm represents one of Kavanagh Media's major competitors." Fuck, of course Dad would know Sam Kavanagh. And then I see it, he really thinks Kate is dangerous. My Dad might be open-minded but he has had to defend enough media personalities from their own stupid slanderous and ill-informed outbursts over the years. They may be his bread and butter but he doesn't trust journalists as far as he can throw them. I wonder how much of a conflict of interest it will be for him to have Kate as a daughter in law one day.

I just wonder what he would think about the conversation I have had with Sam about his daughter. My mind goes back to that night and the phone call I got just as I was pulling up outside Kate's apartment in Portland.

* * *

_I stare at the number expecting it to be Kate but it is a number I don't know. I throw the truck into park and answer it._

_"Elliot. Speak to me." My usual clients and suppliers are used to this greeting so I don't tend to adjust for my private line._

_"Elliot Grey?" A stern male voice, older perhaps. _Who the fuck is this?

_"This is he." I reply._

_"Sam Kavanagh. I believe you are seeing my daughter." _How the hell does he know this and how did he get this number?

_"Yes sir although I believe that this might be a conversation you should be having with her." Not that I care about this obvious invasion of my privacy but I sure as hell care about hers._

_"Don't get lippy with me young man. I am talking to you and I can tell you right now that I don't particularly approve of her seeing someone like you." _Define someone like me, you prick._ He sounds pretty pissed off but then so am I. _You don't scare me Sam Kavanagh.

_"Right at this moment I don't particularly care about your approval, Sam." Now I am deliberately goading him. _Sir to Sam in one quick sentence._ "Kate's approval is all I need right now. But tell me Sam what is it that you don't approve of in particular?" _The fact that I have a reputation or the fact that I am going to spend the rest of the night screwing your daughter every which way.

_"You have a track record that is neither smart nor healthy. Kate is a lot more sensitive than she will ever let on and she doesn't need to be used and abused by the likes of you. I do not want my daughter notched up on your bedpost and then left with a broken heart. She is better than that." _I know she is. God I know she is.

_"Look, Mr Kavanagh. I appreciate that you want to protect her but Kate is a big girl. She is capable of making up her own mind about me. I think you need to give her that opportunity. If she ever says she doesn't want me I will bow out gracefully but right now that doesn't look likely, sir." He cares about her and that makes him okay in my book. I want him to know that I care too._

_"Grey, I am not happy about this and I will do everything in my power to change Kate's mind before it is too late. I don't want her hurt by you or tainted by whatever secrets you or your brother are hiding." _Shit! What does he know about Christian? Fuck._ This man has just become very dangerous to two of the most important people in my life. _Back off old man.

_"I am sure that I don't know what you are talking about. My brother has an impeccable reputation in both his business and personal life. He is a smart businessman and a big hearted philanthropist. I don't know what secrets you are referring to but I think you are speculating and you better have some damn good proof before you take on the Grey brothers." I am shaking. _Fuck, how does he know any of this and what the hell am I going to tell Christian? My past is one thing but Christian, shit he doesn't even know that I know. I would talk to Elena but that bitch is a large part of the problem. Shit, is it her? If it is I will... what, shut her up?_ Right now I feel totally impotent and I don't want Kate to get caught up in this. He has to be guessing. There is no way that this could get out. Christian has always been so careful and the only way that I know about it was purely accidental._

_"Just take this as a warning from a very concerned father. I will do anything to protect my daughter and I don't want her caught up in any of your shit."_  
_"Understand this sir. Kate is my top priority right now and if I thought there was any shit for her to get caught up in I would be keeping a very wide berth. Now I suggest you back off and let her make her own decisions about me and my family." I cut him off and throw my head and hands down on the steering wheel in frustration._

* * *

I can see that Dad's association with Sam Kavanagh is news to everyone in the room except Kate. This revelation seems to have an interesting effect on her. Suddenly she seems less nervous while my nerves have ratcheted up a couple of notches. I have tried hard to sweep the threat of Sam Kavanagh under the mat but now it just might come back to bite me. What really scares me is the look on Kate's face, her eyes have gone hard and cold in the same way that Christian looks when he is in his hard-nosed take no prisoners business mogul mode. Suddenly I have this deadly reminder that Kate is her father's daughter and she just might be catching the scent of a story.

_Fuck!_

"No, my brother has diverse interests but media has never really been one of them." She flashes that tough-as-nails Kate K smile at my Dad who stares back impassively. _So much for everybody having a big love fest._ We obviously have a long way to go before trust develops here which makes this trip to Barbados even more important for any future happiness. I have to win over Sam Kavanagh which sounds like it will be as likely as the Mariners making a World Series final. Still I need Kate to see that she can be a part of this family but like any family, we need loyalty and she is going to have to learn to guard our secrets not expose them. Now I am really freaked about how much she already knows because of me. Not so much that I think she will write about it but because I suddenly know that she will always wonder if our relationship is a vehicle to gag her. _ So much for my happily ever fucking after._

"Well, I for one am very jealous that you are dragging Elliot off to Barbados. It is probably one of the few places in the world I haven't been to." Mia pipes up. While I don't think she is completely oblivious to all the subtle undercurrents in the room, she masks it by doing bubbly and enthusiastic better than anyone I know. I am so thankful that she is trying to diffuse this situation. "So a family holiday, where are you staying?"

Kate launches into a detailed description of the villa her Mom booked while Dad and I share a silent conversation. His look says _'reign her in, Elliot'_ while mine says, _'back off Dad, I've go this under control'_ but neither of us is convinced. Thankfully, Ana and Christian choose that moment to arrive and Mia has trotted off to get them wine. As I watch them, I see what Kate has been talking about. How much Ana defers to Christian, as if she is unsure what to do. She is conversational but careful with her words. It is unsettling to watch.

Christian holds her hand constantly but never moves any closer. Unfortunately for him this has the opposite effect on me as I give Ana a big welcome hug that sets him on edge. For some reason, any chance to annoy Christian appeals to me. Kate smiles her approval of my actions at Christian as if she is throwing down a gauntlet and for a moment I feel sorry for him. While I like to goad him I also know there is a point that I can't go past and that might have been three seconds of this hug ago.

The fact that we are brothers means there are similarities as well differences. We are both more like Dad than either of us would like to admit sometimes. Dad has given us a solid, ethical core even if it might seem to the world that Christian is a prick and I am a frivolous man-whore. It makes us stubbornly defensive of family. I hope that Ana and Kate can see that about us. I give Christian a reassuring pat on the shoulder that he grimly acknowledges. Unless we are engaged in full hand to hand combat that is as close to physical contact that the Grey boys get. The last time he tried to take me on was back in Portland a few days ago.

* * *

_We head out to the car, Christian is whistling and tossing his keys in the air. He is driving the R8 which always seems a little ostentatious to me but it suits him. Even though we both have to fold our tall frames into the seats we do so with uncommon grace and flexibility. You could put this down to our martial arts training as kids but I figure it might have as much to do with our adult lifestyles._

_"So bro. Are you going to tell all?" I look over at him and his face is closed down as usual. _

_"I don't kiss and tell, Elliot, you know that." He doesn't look happy but he seldom does these days. I worry about it and I try to make him laugh at himself more often but I know why he feels so closed off. When you have a shitload of crap to deal with from your childhood and a lifestyle that has to remain in the dark then surliness and secrecy kind of goes with the territory. I want him to be happy and I wonder for the hundredth time in the last 24 hours if Ana isn't going to be part of that happiness._

_We are driving back to the hotel to pick up our gear and then, I guess from what I overheard, that Christian is going to give Ana the full blown chopper experience and fly her back to Seattle for dinner. Over the top but that is his style. Only I have other plans that don't involve leaving Portland just yet and Christian doesn't need to know about those._

_"So you hit it off with Katherine Kavanagh." Christian says. "Thanks for taking care of her for me. I definitely owe you one for taking that particular hit."_  
_This just pisses me off. "No problem bro, any time." I mutter through clenched teeth. I want to call him a prick but then that would be giving away too much._

_There is a lull in the conversation and I can almost hear his brain working away. He pulls into the car park at the Heathman and turns off the ignition. Instead of getting out of the car he turns to me. _

_"Elliot. I don't particularly care for Kate Kavanagh and I think you can tell that she doesn't care much for me. Be that as it may, she is Ana's best friend and I don't want you to hurt her. So don't play this up any further." This is seriously going to end in a fight so I get out of the car in an effort to make him shut the fuck up. He climbs out his side and just has to continue."Make the break clean so that she doesn't get too invested in you. I don't want Ana blaming me for Kate's broken heart." _

_"Hold up there, hoss." I stalk around to his side of the car to face him down. He might be taller and faster than me but I am bigger than him. _Keep this up and I not only will I knock you into the middle of next week but I will kick your sorry ass on Thursday._ "For a start who says I am going to break her heart? We enjoyed each others company and we may continue to see each other. That is none of your business and I am not going to temper my relationship by trying to keep Ana happy. That is your job, but if you're not up to it..."_

_And then I see it. His fist swings back and goes to hit me. I block him and grip his fist hard. Shit, he's strong but luckily I am stronger. _

_"Back off Christian. You're not the only one who is going through something life changing here." I see his eyes widen first with surprise and then with a little bit of fear. _Yeah, I know how you feel. This is big and important and likely to completely undo both of us._ The tension goes out of his body and he steps back._

_"I still want to beat the shit out of you right now." He mumbles._

_"Yeah, back at ya bro." I reply. The Grey boys both have it bad. Only thing is that I am not sure how long it will take for Christian to recognize what is actually happening here. Part of me wants to spell it out to him using me and Kate as an example but another part knows it would be better to step back and let him discover it in his own time. I just wonder how Ana is going to take all of Christian. I figure if she hasn't run screaming in the first month then there might be a chance. Of course, I can't tell Kate any of this, can I? Not because I don't trust her as a person but there is so much at stake here and she is a journalist at heart. Plus I never want Christian to know that I know. That is not a conversation two brothers should ever have._

* * *

Mom calls us to dinner and the conversation turns once more to vacations. This is the first that Ana has heard about me going away with Kate and I give her a big grin to cover the fact that I am patently aware how fast we are moving. She mentions going to visit her Mom in Georgia and I see Christian is surprised and somewhat pissed at the news. _Good on you, Ana_. She obviously hasn't rushed to sign his contract and this will be getting to him, I am sure.

Dinner seems to be an exercise in restraint for them both. There is a lot of whispering and some obvious movement under the table that we are all trying to ignore until I see a look of shock brush quickly over Christian's face. _Fuck, she is saying no._ Her face is so easy to read and I silently applaud her while raising Kate's hand to my mouth in front of everyone and kissing it. I get this overwhelming urge to feed her and I laugh to myself as I imagine what reaction that might get from across the table.

Kate leans across the table to Ana. "What are you two whispering about?"

"Just about my trip to Georgia," she replies. Kate gets that hard smile across her face. _Whatever it is, don't do it Kate?_ And then she does it.

"How was Jose when you went to the bar with him on Friday?" She asks innocently taking a sip of wine. Alarm bells go off in my head as I grip her thigh hard under the table. Ana's mouth hangs open and Christian just glares. _Priceless._ Kate's eyes widen into a questioning gaze back at her. Christian looks like he wants to spank Ana. I feel a brief moment of angst as I take that thought to its logical conclusion. _Shit, will he really hurt her?_ I study his face but he reveals nothing. _Fuck._ There is some quick discussion between them and I overhear the words 'palm-twitchingly mad' and my fingers pinch into Kate's skin. Leaning over I whisper in her ear.

"Stop it Kate or I will take you upstairs and spank you, too." My hand is still firm on her thigh and I rub it up towards her apex just stopping short before pulling away. I am so fucking mad at her. If anyone is going to taunt Christian it should be me, not my girlfriend. I lift my hand to my mouth and catch a whiff of Kate's musky scent that stops me short. _Fuck, she is wet, and I only just touched her. Or is it because I threatened to spank her?_ I take a quick glance and see her heated blush.

In spite of how tense Ana and Christian are the conversation throughout the rest of the meal is relaxed and easy. We talk about their new apartment, sports, Paris and my family are doing what they do best. Enjoying each others company. Well maybe not Christian, he just looks desperate to get Ana somewhere alone. I know how he feels.

In an effort to distract I tease Mia about her time in Paris. It seems that it wasn't all that she hoped but there is a collective choke from the four of us when she refers to her cooking tutor as a domineering tyrant who cracks the whip in the kitchen. We all recover before the others notice but it is close. Mia continues regaling us with stories blissfully unaware and at one stage she and Christian lapse into a conversation in fluent French that stops us all until they realize they have done it and we all burst into laughter. Soon the conversation turns to my latest project which I know is just Dad making sure that he has a proper conversation with each one of us. That is one thing he does really well giving his time and attention to each of us equally.

The latest developments in eco-friendly building get me carried away and I am vaguely aware that I am probably boring the shit out of everyone with the research in this area, except Dad and Christian. Although I notice that Kate asks the most insanely intelligent questions I have ever heard but I am holding my own because of Christian's interest in and funding of this research. He has always made sure that I could stay on top of developments by talking me through the research papers. He has never made me feel like shit for things I couldn't make sense of and the confidence he has instilled in me over the past few years means that I don't need him to translate it all for me as much as I used to when I first started my company. It's another side of him that he doesn't show the world.

I glance at Kate who looks a little more relaxed with Dad and Christian as we continue our debate. The discussion gets heated but I can see that Kate has a similar streak as Dad in that they both like to play devil's advocate. Mom, Mia and Ana are hardly bystanders as the discussion progresses and I can't help but think this sudden doubling of strong, intelligent, passionate and committed women in my family is going make the Greys a force to be reckoned with and the Grey men very nervous. _God help us all._ Suddenly I am hoping that whatever doubts she may have about my family, my playboy past or Christian's lifestyle pale into insignificance now that she can see what we are really like.

When she scores a point against Dad that has him acknowledging a grudging respect for her tenacity and intelligence, I grin at her trying hard to communicate a promise in my eyes. _I love you, I want this with you, forever._ There is a moment when I can see she gets it and I just hope it is enough.  
We are still talking solar panels when Ana and Christian decide to disappear through the backyard. I lean towards Kate with a whisper.

"Damn, little brother is stealing my moves again. I wanted to take you out to the boathouse." Her eyes are shining and she blushes. Instead, we rise and go to help clean the kitchen. The laughter and warmth continues as we all tease Mia some more about Paris. Christian and Ana have been gone for a while and I notice that Mia is getting tired.

"Perhaps we should go and let Mia get some more sleep." Kate says reading my mind and when she looks up at me I am anxious to get her home. She smiles and nods with unspoken promise in her eyes. I just wish that she wouldn't hold back what she is feeling. The warning from her father hangs like a shadow over us and once again I hope that this night with my family has eased her doubts.

"Mom, Dad, I think we better head off." Mia is yawning and I wrap an arm around her shoulder. "I think baby needs her bed." I give her a kiss on the top of her head. Kate gives me a look of approval.

"Oh, darling, you have to say good bye to Christian. After all you won't see him for two weeks now if you are going away the day after tomorrow. Carrick go out and get them will you darling?" Mom looks out the kitchen window toward the boathouse and Kate and I both tense up as we realize what Dad might encounter. Before we can do anything Mia pipes up.

"I'll go, I need some fresh air to clear my head," she chirps and she is out the door before we can do anything. At least Mia will make a lot of noise on approach which might warn them to tidy themselves up. It is not that I think Mom and Dad don't suspect that they are making out but I am pretty sure they don't need or want to know about any of the kinky stuff. Moving the party to the front door seems like the best way to avoid a scene. We are at the front door saying our thank yous and goodbyes when they walk through the house towards us. Mom wraps me in a big hug while Dad kisses Kate on the cheek. It seems that whatever tension there was between them before has all but gone now.

"Take care of each other young ones and give us a call to let us know you are okay." We nod agreement and head out to her car. I toss the keys up in the air as we pass Christian's SUV and deliberately miss my catch so that I have to stop by the driver door. Jason is inside. We pause for a moment by the open window while I pretend to pick the keys up off the ground.

"Jason."

He nods without looking at me. "Elliot."

"Has she seen the playroom?" Kate looks quizzical but keeps her mouth shut.

"Yep." Jason is taciturn. I blow out a long breath of air.

"And she is still here, huh? Take care of her Jason. She's special." My words have surprised Kate but not as much as Jason's.

"Yeah, I think she is." Then we resume our walk to her car. We climb in and she lets me drive again. Just as well since, as predicted, she has had a couple of glasses of wine.

"What was that about?" She asks. "What is the playroom?"

"You don't want to know." I turn onto the main road and keep my eyes focused ahead of us hoping that she will let the subject drop. Instead she lets everything drop. Complete silence as she looks at me and waits. And waits. And waits.

"Kate, don't." I keep my voice quiet. I know that she will have done some research, delved into the world of BDSM online and gained some information that was probably both disturbing and quite frankly, hot. I know that was my reaction when I started to look into it. Not that I would want to chain or suspend anyone from the ceiling or cane them for that matter. But some of the toys, the softer kink, that holds a lot of attraction. Especially after tying Kate to the bed last night. _Fuck, yeah, I would do that again in a heartbeat._

"If you won't tell me then I will tell you what I am imagining." She says quietly. "A room with a bed, perhaps some other furniture but not much. Some props around the room, perhaps cuffs, chains, ropes and equipment that they are attached to that would allow someone to be restrained, even spreadeagled or suspended." I gasp but my eyes remain focused on the road ahead. "Then there would be the smaller toys, vibrators, plugs, eggs, beads. And of course whips, crops, canes perhaps." My mouth must be hanging open.

"Shit Kate, you have certainly done your research?" She has all but described the playroom. _How the hell does she know all of this?_

"Keep your knickers on, Grey. Thorough research goes with the territory if you want to do investigative journalism. However, your reaction confirms just how fucked up and kinky Christian's playroom actually is and I can't believe that virginal Ana has started her first sexual relationship with someone so ... dangerous." Now she is angry. I know she believes that Ana deserves love and romance for a first relationship not this kinky fucked up sub/dom thing. Right now, I can read Kate like a book. I can tell that she is pissed at Christian for pulling Ana into this, pissed at Ana for agreeing to it and pissed at me for thinking that everything will be alright.

"Kate, he is not a dangerous person, not to her. Yes, it is not the usual sort of relationship and perhaps Ana may decide it is not for her but Jason and Gail are keeping a close eye on her."

"And what, Elliot. Are they going to storm into his playroom and extract her, naked, at the first sound of a scream? How will they judge when things are going to far? And who the hell will stop him from breaking her heart." She is yelling at me now so I pull off the side of the road. There are tears in her eyes and I am pissed at everyone as I consider just how fucked up this all is. I wish that Christian wasn't like this. I wish he had some sort of handle on normal but he doesn't, he never has. I just wish that Kate could see what I see. Christian is really falling for Ana in a way I never believed possible. Jason's reaction says everything to me. No one would know better than he does how fucked up Christian has been these last few years and how much Ana is reaching him on some level. I don't want Ana to get hurt but I really believe that she is strong enough to drag him into some kind of sane relationship. One where he might allow himself, for the first time ever, to be loved. My concern right now is how to calm Kate down.

"Kate, she has the control in this. Ana has the power in the relationship which you would know from your research. The sub can always say no. There are safewords, contracts... he might be calling the plays but she has the choice whether to execute them or not." I am looking at her intently, trying to reason with her. "Please, Katie, you are going to have to trust both of them. They know what they are doing."

She leans into my arms and cries. I hate it when she cries. "I don't know what to do to keep my friend safe and I am scared that from what I have seen of Ana so far, Christian is going to hurt her heart, even if he doesn't hurt her body." She sobs. "Jesus, you saw what they were like tonight. He controls her and she can't do a thing without his judgement. He wanted to punish her, he all but said it. When is enough, enough for him? This is not fucking normal!"

"I know baby, but even if they were having a straightforward relationship there is no guarantee that either of them won't get hurt. You just have to be there for her." She nods without looking up or pulling away. "Somehow we have to let her make the decision to stay or go. I just know somehow this is different and you are going to have to trust me that I know Christian well enough to know this. She has as much, if not **_more_** power over him right now. I don't know how to convince you but I just know that if she leaves him, she is likely to break him too."

We are both quiet for a while, me stroking her back while she gently cries. Eventually I feel a shift in her body as she pulls herself together. I pass her one more tissue as the tears begin to dry up.

"Did you really want to spank me?" She mutters into my shirt.

"Baby, you make so mad sometimes. It's like you have this insane urge to set off fireworks in the middle of a crowd just to see who will jump and who will run." I laugh. "The only thing that stops me is that I have a feeling you would like it and want more. As a punishment it seems a bit pointless." She freezes for a moment and then all the tension floods out of her body as if she has made some mammoth decision. It is as if she has been worried about something all night and somehow I have just said the one thing that will calm her nerves and for the life of me I can't think what it could have been.

"Does that mean that you won't spank me?" She asks in a teasing voice. Her scent is filling up the car as she squirms a little on her seat.

I smile, "I never said that. This talk of spanking is turning you on, isn't it?" I tip her chin up with my fingers so I can look in her eyes. She is fighting her embarrassment as she nods. _Jesus, Kate!_ I am rock hard just thinking about it.

"Well, I don't know about doing half the stuff that I suspect Christian is into but if you want to play then I am all for it. I have already tied you up. We will just have to work out our soft limits together, huh?" We smile at each other before sharing a chaste kiss. With that promise I start the car up and pull out onto the road again. She drifts off as we head back towards the interstate. _Now, there is just one more thing that we have to take care of tonight, Miss K._


	22. Chapter 22

_******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**_

* * *

_**There's a note underneath your front door **_

_**That I wrote twenty years ago **_

_**Yellow paper and a faded picture **_

_**And a secret in an envelope**_

_**-20 years - The Civil Wars  
**_

* * *

Half an hour later stirs and sits up with a sweet confused look on her face.

"Where are we going?" She whispers.

"My place." She looks ready to argue with me then settles back in her seat in a sulk. "I wanted to see your place but I would have liked to be asked. Especially after the discussion we have just had."

I realized my error about twenty minutes ago but I am hoping that she will forgive me.

"I'm sorry. I wanted it to be a surprise so 'SURPRISE'!" I smile sheepishly at her. _She's right, you're a fucking Neanderthal, Grey! _

"This could be considered an abduction you know." _She's mad._ A little laugh escapes from me and her face gets real sour. _She's really mad._

Finally we pull into a set of gates and drive up a long sweeping driveway that winds through a canopy of trees. Eventually the drive opens up in front of a modern building that is nestled on a steep slope in amongst more trees. The house is situated to look like a state of the art tree house built over four levels. There's a lot of natural wood cladding, local stone and glass that makes it disappear into the scenery. Beyond is an incredible view of the water. My pride and joy.

Kate's mouth is hanging open as she takes it in but she is still mad at me so I can't tell what she is really thinking. Leaping out of the car and she slams the door shut and stomps up to the front door away from me as fast as she can travel in those heels. I follow in her wake without saying a word. _I want you to like this so much, baby._ I lean across her to open the front door and then before she can step foot inside I sweep her up into my arms and carry her inside.

"What the hell do you think you're doing Elliot? Put me down." She hisses. Her hand reaches out to swat my chest and I barely flinch away from it. I figure I probably deserve it but I am getting kind of pissed at her reaction.

"I wanted you to remember that I carried you across the threshold the first time the first time you came here. Even if we aren't married...yet...I thought it would be romantic but I guess I was wrong." I heft her up and thunder through the foyer entry to a smaller hallway and then out into the open living room. There are floor to ceiling windows that look out on the water which I have always found kind of breathtaking. Seems Kate does too because she appears to be speechless as the house and the location do their magic. That is until I dump her unceremoniously on the large beige couch and walk past the dining table to the kitchen without a word. I hear the little yelp as I drop her but don't give her a second glance.

Struggling to sit up and straighten her skirt has her frustrated. I want her to be gobsmacked by the beauty and tranquility of this place but we are both too angry at each other. She angrily kicks off her heels and follows me into the kitchen where I have pulled out a bottle of water from the fridge and am in the process of sculling it. I hold it out to her as I swallow with a scowl on his face. _Big romantic gesture and I fucking blew it._ Now I am more angry because she looks so sexy and I want her more than ever. I must look like a prize dick with water dripping down my chin. She, on the other hand, takes the bottle and holds it up to her mouth tipping it back for a long drink. The water sliding down her elegant throat. Suddenly all my bravado is gone and I realize just how much every other woman I have every met pales compared to her. Stubbornly I think I don't deserve her but she is not getting away. Eventually she places the bottle on the bench between us and I angrily recap it and put it away in the fridge again with a scowl.

"Well," she says. "Are you going to talk to me or is this silent treatment going to go on all night?"

"What would you like me to say Kate? I'm sorry I wanted to bring you here? To what I hope in the not too distant future, will be our home? Is that what you want me to say?" Our eyes are ablaze as we glare at each other. "Well I am not sorry. You are mine, you will always be mine. And we will fight and we will still go to bed together every night and love each other. Because that is what this is about. So welcome home, Kate. Now are you coming to bed?"

Her mouth is hanging open like a goldfish which would be kind of funny but I am really angry at her. She pulls herself together and gives me that look, the one that challenges the world and everything in it and makes me instantly hard. The tension is radiating off my body in waves and she just looks so freaking hot. I want her more than I have ever wanted anything or anyone and I can't reconcile this with the anger I feel at her for questioning this and at me for my own heavy handedness. I can't decide if I am more pissed at her or myself right now.

"You have no right to make decisions for me. You will do me the courtesy of asking me for my opinion and yes I am coming to bed with you." She yells at me.

Just then we hear a deep resonant bark as my giant German Shepherd comes charging through the room toward us. He is excited by the yelling and looks set to launch himself at her as she shrieks running behind my body for protection. I wrap an arm around her and put my out other hand to stop my giant wolf hound. Kate's look is absolutely terrified and stunned and I could swear her eyes are asking if he is going to eat her. _Lick you death baby but not eat you._

"Zeus, down." Zeus immediately lowers his head and goes silent. Then he drops himself down into a prone position with a little yelp. I hold his gaze while pointing down at the floor and eventually he puts his head down on his paws. Meanwhile Kate's body is shaking with fear as she snuggles into my body for safety.

"Good boy." I let go of Kate slightly and signal to Zeus who is up on his feet coming towards me. He plants his paws on either shoulder and licks my face while I wrap my arms around him in my usual greeting. "Hey Zeusy, did you miss me. Good boy." I ruff his fur gently and I remember, with Kate so small beside me, how large and intimidating Zeus can be. I push him down and he lowers himself down into a sitting position at my feet expectantly looking up at both of us with a big dopey doggy grin.

"Kate, this is Zeus. Zeus, this is Kate." At that moment I flick my hand and Zeus rolls over on his back exposing is stomach and lolling about like an idiot. I place a socked foot on his stomach and rub vigorously while he wriggles which serves the purpose of making Kate relax and giggle. _Thank God. "_He is really very friendly but I guess he just didn't like you yelling at me without an introduction." I take her hand and pull her gently towards Zeus. She is still a little nervous but trying not to show it. Zeus sits up obediently and licks her hand then nuzzles his head so that she can scratch his ears. _Zeus, you are such sucker for a pretty face. I have trained you well, Obi Wan._

"Hi Zeus. You are a beautiful boy, aren't you?" Instantly her mood changes and she seems completely enamored of my gentle giant who is every bit as loveable as his owner if she would give us half a chance. I am smiling down at them both indulgently hoping that Zeus has achieved something that neither my stunning house or fabulous personality seem to be able to do. _Out done by a fucking dog!_

"I knew you two would love each other." I reach down to pat Zeus again and then we both move off to the door. Opening it, Zeus goes charging out across the grass. We stand out on the extensive porch and watch Zeus run down to the water and then back up to us again.

"Elliot he is beautiful." Kate laughs. _Love my dog, love me?._ "How old is he?"

"He is six years old. I have had him ever since I started my company. He's a site dog, an unofficial mascot on every project." I smile at Zeus as he comes romping back towards us. _Please fall in love with us Kate._ After ten minutes or so of throwing a tennis ball for Zeus we go back into the house and settle down in front of a gas log fire. It is not particularly cool but the fire makes the room feel cosy anyway. I have whipped us up a cup of tea and Zeus is lying at our feet. I am amazed at how calm they both are now compared to when we came in.

"Well, what do you think?" I am anxious to know what she thinks. I love this house, I feel comfortable here but I need her to love it too. _Otherwise what, Elliot? _I can't even finish that thought. There can be no other option for me now but a life with Kate.

Her eyes look around the main room taking everything in and then her gaze comes back to me. "I love it, it is very you. The use of natural wood and stone, the size and orientation to the outdoor environment..."

"Not quite what I meant, Katie." I look down at my hands for a moment. Feeling nervous and shy I look back at her face. "Do you like it?"  
For a moment she seems confused.

"I just said I did." Then she realizes what I am asking her. _Do you like it? Can you see yourself living here, with me? _ I want her to see this place as our home. I can see her running through a thousand questions in her head, completely over thinking everything. I know we are moving too fast but I am just so damn sure that this is what I want.

"Elliot, I..." She falters in her answer and I feel crushed. I can see that she is desperately searching for the right thing to say and my heart is suddenly lying on the floor between us. _Fucking karma._ "I do love it. But this is all so fast. Can't we just slow things down for a moment? We could take more time, I mean I have only just moved to Seattle, I haven't even started my career." She moves towards me. _Trying to soak up my disappointment with tea and sympathy._ "I can see that I will love this place...when the time is right. Give us time. Please."

My arms reach out and pull her into my body as I lower my mouth to hers for a chaste kiss. "My sensible, beautiful Katie. I know you're right, I just want you to be mine. I can't help it. I never imagined that I would find you." I can't look at her because for the first time in a long time I think I might actually cry. She doesn't love me yet and I keep fucking pushing her. Like I can just will it too happen.

"Nor I you. And I guess in my heart I am already yours. There is no question of that. It's just taking my mind a while to catch up." She whispers and suddenly she is offering me a little ray of hope. I look into her eyes for the lie but it isn't there. Relief pours through me. _Time, she just needs more time._ She continues, "I just...I need to settle my own life before I can feel right about bringing it to you. You are so far ahead of me in this, with your company and your goals. I am still finding my feet and I want to make sure that you are getting the best that I can be."

Her words filter in as I process what she is saying. How can she possibly think that she is not good enough now? I want to tell her that she is but I can see in her eyes that she is sincere about this.

"Time...I get it." And I do but it fucking hurts. For the first time in my life I feel like I really need someone, really love someone - Kate - and here I am riding roughshod over her trying to get my way. She reaches up to stroke my face. "I'll stop pushing. I promise. When you are ready, I will be here."

"I am sorry for fighting with you. I don't want this thing with Christian to come between us." And now we are back to Christian and suddenly I think that if he and I had thought a little more about our reputations then I wouldn't be struggling here, wearing my heart on my sleeve. I'm just glad that she seems to be about to give her protective streak a holiday and then I see a look of panic cross her face.

"What, what is it?" I am trying to work out her change of mood without much success.

"I just realized that we have to get on a plane at noon the day after tomorrow and I haven't unpacked enough in the apartment to be able to pack for Barbados yet. There is still so much to do." She shakes her head in thought and I think if she and Ana are going to spend their lives in bed with the Grey brothers then it seems likely that they may never get their apartment organized. Once more I feel guilty for my bulldozer approach.

"I tell you what," I look at her intently, holding her hands. "How about you forget that tonight, because you are not going home to unpack boxes in the middle of the night anyway. Stay here and make sweet love with me. I will get you back to the city early tomorrow. I need to pick up my truck from your place anyway and get out to the site so I can tidy up enough to be able to leave on Tuesday. You can then spend the whole day getting yourself organized and I will come back to your place tomorrow night to help you as soon as I can."

It only takes a moment for her to smile in agreement and just as suddenly frown.

"What happens to Zeus if you are going away? Who will take care of him?"

_Oh shit. What do I tell her?_ More guilt that I try to conceal with a bland smile. "Oh, he usually stays here and someone comes and stays with him. He is much happier staying at home than at a kennel so it works out well. Both Zeus and the house get looked after. I have a live in housekeeper during the week and then a ...friend comes to be with him on the weekend."

She nods but there are questions in her eyes. I have a lot of 'friends' who are willing to do me a favor and I know I will have to resist calling on them from now on. Luckily not all of my friends are women. In fact, the stories of my many conquests are slightly exaggerated which I always figured worked in my favor before. _Yeah, if you had quashed them sooner you might have had a clear conscience and cleaner reputation. Fucked up royally, man._

I hold out my hand to her. "Come on, I want to show you the rest of the house," I smile as she places her hand in mine. We move out past the kitchen to drop our cups in the sink and then I lead her through the rooms on this first level, keeping up a running commentary of the features of the house. There is a state of the art theater room with a large screen and games consoles (plural). Past this there is another room with a bar and overly large billiard table. The next room is a small exercise room with gym equipment on one side and a large open studio space with mirrors. This connects through to a large indoor swimming pool. I highlight the glass ceiling that is motorized to open in summer and explain how the solar panels keep the pool heated and generate enough electricity on the grid to be able to keep the costs of running all the electricity the house requires down to a minimum. The rooms are also fitted with ducts that automatically open to circulate warm and cool air throughout the house.

She notices the smart technology throughout the house and I show her how the lights are on movement sensors so that they turn off if no one is in the room. We go back to the main room and I lead her to some stairs that descend down to a level built into the side of the hill. We walk into a room that is full of recording equipment and computer screens. There is a window into a room beyond where a baby grand piano and drum kit sit in front of a wall hung with guitars of every size and shape. Her eyes travel to my face.

"This is my version of a playroom." I say with a big grin. I love this space.

"You have a recording studio? Wow." Her voice is full of disbelief at what she is seeing and once more I am reminded how little we know about each other which just confirms that she is right about slowing down.

"Yeah, I have been recording music, my own and others since high school. My friends and I were into Cobain back in junior high, around the time the rest of the world fell in love with Nirvana so we have always just done this. Some of my crew are in a band and we get together after work and jam in here. It's fun."

"Do you play?" She asks as we walk through to the studio.

"A little, I have played guitar since I was 6 years old." I flick a few switches on the desk in the control room and then wander through to the soundproof studio to grab my favorite Takamine acoustic electric guitar off the wall and plug it in. I perch on a stool and tune it up. She takes the stool next to me and watches my fingers working. I begin playing a riff of a Civil Wars song I have seen on her ipod.

I start singing and without hesitation she joins in singing the harmony. I know she knows this song well because it is in her most played list and she sings it beautifully. We begin to merge our voices and it feels and sounds so good to my ears. Her eyes close as she drifts away in the music and she opens them only we get to the last line. My eyes are watching her intently. _So beautiful. So perfect._

"Kate, that was amazing. You have a beautiful voice." I don't mean to sound so surprised but it is so great to find another thing that we can share. I can't wait to get her in here for a proper recording session.

"You too. That was so much fun. Thank you." And I suddenly see what sort of future we will have in this house with our children and friends making music and enjoying life. Tears well up in my eyes, this is everything and more than I could ever imagine and I have to hide it from her. She wants slow, I can do freakin' slow but it looks I am going to turn into a blubbering mess in the process.

Placing the guitar on a stand beside the stool I reach out and pull her to stand between my legs. I say the thing I can't hide. "Kate, you are perfect in every way. I can't believe I have finally found you," I murmur. "I want to show you more of the house but it will have to wait. It's late and I really need to make love to you before we go to sleep."

"Yeah, I'd really like that too." Her voice is quiet and my heart is pounding so loud I am sure she can hear it. I am about to spend my first night in this house with her which I hope will be where we will live possibly for the rest of our lives. _I am as nervous as freakin' a virgin._

"Come." She takes my hand and I lead her over to a lift that is concealed beyond the stairs. It takes us up beyond the ground level to the first floor where we step out into a large open space with a large glassed in balcony that looks out over the pool and the water in the bay beyond that. Turning to the right we move through double doors into the large bedroom that appears to be nestled in the trees. There is a partial wall that separates the main room from a dressing room and ensuite. The wall acts as a headboard for my enormous king size bed. She is obviously stunned by it all as she looks around.

"Look," I say pointing up at the large skylight on the ceiling, "you can lie in bed and look up at the stars at night".

We stop by the bed and I hold her reverently in my arms placing gentle kisses on her eyelids and down the side of her face. My hands begin to slide down her body and I reach around to unzip the back of her skirt. I slide it off her hips and drop it down so she can step out of it placing her small hands on my shoulders to balance herself. I throw the skirt neatly over the back of a chair and then begin to trace a lazy line up the sides of her body which I follow with gentle licks as I slide both her cardigan and singlet off.

"Kate. You. Are. So. Beautiful." I say these words in between the kisses I am pressing into her skin and her little involuntary movements are setting me on fire. As I start to straighten up she reaches out to undo the buttons of my white linen shirt. Once more I am breathless as she exposes my chest and shoulders. She plants kisses of her own on my pecs and I flex them slightly under her lips making her giggle. My laugh resonates through my chest as I brush my hands through her hair.

Our mouths meet and tongues invade each other as our hands explore skin. I want to press closer and feel every part of her. I undo her bra and slide it off her shoulders tossing it to the floor. My hand massages her breast and she slides her hands up to my shoulders to giving me better access.

"Oh, Katie, I want you so much." My voice is a hushed gasp in the dim light of the stars and she throw s back her head to give my mouth access to her hard pert nipples. I suck and lave driving her into a writhing frenzy. She leans right back in an exquisitely executed back bend pushing her pelvis hard into my erection. I am fairly aching with need for her. When she rights herself she jumps and wrap her long legs around my waist. Catching her easily I continue kissing her as I walk around the bed and lay her down gently before following her down with my body.

She pushes back on me. "Let's get these off Grey." She reaches up and undoes my jeans sliding them down with my boxers in one movement. I reach down to step out of my pants in a rush and then I am on the bed with her. My hand pushes her panties down her legs so that we are both naked and lying skin to skin on our sides my erection pressing hard against her stomach.

Our embrace is gentle but heated and we continue to thrash our tongues together tasting each other for a moment before I start to move down her body. My hands and mouth are burning a trail down her torso and she knows exactly where I am heading. She holds my head as my tongue starts to lick her beautiful hard clitoris and my fingers slide inside her. She feels like she could explode at any moment and I wouldn't be very far behind her.

"You taste so fucking sweet, Katie," I say between licks then I suck her juices which is enough to tip her over the edge crying out my name as she pulses around my fingers. I don't remove them from inside her as I slide back up her body, keeping her ramped up and moving towards another orgasm. My mouth closes over her and I let her taste herself on my tongue. Her hand reaches down to grab my length, stroking it gently and I throw my head back a moment to gasp. I move over her and into her so swiftly building into a rhythm that is an extraordinary exercise in restraint. My hips are thrusting in a languid motion, which she seems to be willing me to increase with every tilt of her pelvis. I just don't want to come to soon. Her legs wrap around my hips to bring me in further.

"Oh fuck, Katie. You feel amazing." Sweat has broken out on my lip and she licks it off. Our eyes focus in the dim light and we hold this gaze as we both build. "Come for me sweetheart. I love you." And her orgasm blends with mine in one excruciatingly pleasurable sensation of love and need. It takes us both a long time to come down and I roll, panting on my back taking her with me so that my still hard length remains inside her body. We fall asleep like this, me still inside her, both too exhausted to do anything else. I am dimly aware of Zeus lying down on the floor at the foot of the bed as I drift off.


	23. Chapter 23

**__****This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**_So come over here and tell me what I wanna hear _**

**_Better yet, make your girlfriend disappear _**

**_I don't wanna hear you say her name ever again_**

**_She's like so whatever _**

**_You can do so much better I think we should get together now _**

**_And that's what everyone's talking about _**

**_Hey hey, you you, I don't like your girlfriend _**

**_No way no way, I think you need a new one _**

**_Hey hey, you you, I could be your girlfriend_**

**_-Girlfriend - Avril Lavigne  
_**

* * *

The morning light filters through the trees and touches my face as I lay spread out in bed. Twice during the night we had woken up and made gentle love and I was amazed at how easily we stirred each other to a sweet climax each time. Sleeping with her is easy and natural and once again I think the words as I look at her, _'how lucky I am to have found you'_. That morning we met at the photographic shoot seems a lifetime ago and I try to reconcile the coolness she tried to portray with the warm creature snuggled by my side.

It is 5am and I can't stay asleep. Zeus is still in the bedroom with us and I signal for him to stay so that if Kate wakes without me she will know that I have not gone far. I get up, use the bathroom and then cross the mezzanine room to the staircase. Stripping off, it is only a moment before I am doing lazy laps in the pool. After a dozen or so I stand up to wipe the water from my face and notice Kate standing at the window above me. I wave as she opens the sliding door and walks out on the balcony.

"Come on down, baby. Come swim with me."

She laughs, "I don't have anything to wear." I am standing in waist deep water and I watch her carefully as she registers that I am not wearing anything. Her eyes widen. "Oh, there may not be much swimming if I come down there."

"Just part of my evil plan, sweetheart." I sink back down and start swimming lazily to the house end of the pool. Within minutes she is standing at the end of the pool clad only in a towel. Her smile is sultry and tempting as all hell as she drops her towel and stands naked before me. _Holy shit, she is like a goddess with those decadent curves and that pale creamy skin._

I let out a long whistle of air. She pauses for a moment before executing a perfect dive and then re-emerges in the water sliding up my body. My arms wrap around her and pull her up into a soft wet kiss.

"Hi angel. How are you this morning?"

"Surprisingly refreshed given that you kept me up all night." She giggles and then pushes away from me to swim to the far end of the pool. She cuts through the water in quick and agile strokes. I race after her and catch her just as she hits the wall. "Wow, Miss K, is there nothing you can't do?"

She considers this carefully. "Well, you know I don't cook and I am not really an outdoorsy type."

"But you swim like an Olympian?"

"Well, that's because I nearly was. I was offered a College sports scholarship for diving, came close to qualifying for Beijing. Hence my awesome swimming ability and gymnastics skills. I'm just not too flash on land. I turned it down to do what I love and stay closer to home." I feel like I have never seen her before, Who is this woman?

"So you were a jock?" She looks suddenly shy about the whole thing.

"Yeah, I guess, but so were you. I researched you Mr almost football scholarship." She slaps my chest playfully but I know that I have let the pain show on my face when she stops laughing suddenly. "Oh, shit, Elliot, I'm sorry." Her voice is a whisper.

"Don't Kate. It was a long time ago and I don't need you to pity me." I pull myself out of the water and begin walking down the other end to get a towel. She watches for a moment and then begins to swim fast down the other end to meet me. I'm surprised how quick she is. She goes straight for the ladder and climbs out of the water walking past me to get her towel.

"Look, Elliot, I didn't think. I didn't mean to make you angry." She is pleading with me but I just shake my head. Any anger has faded quickly. I put my hands on her shoulders and pull her into my body.

"It's okay." I murmurs into her hair, "I didn't have the grades to take up a scholarship, end of story. I try not to have any regrets about that and I was lucky that I got an apprenticeship that I enjoyed and could succeed in. It's just sometimes I wish..."

"What baby? What do you wish?" Her voice is a whisper against my chest and then she pulls back to look up at me and I just know that she won't think this is stupid.

"I love my work, I really do. But I have all of these ideas in my head and I just wish that I could have been smart enough to be an architect. You know...to be able to dream big for other people. I designed this place and I could get access to the people I needed to help me make those ideas come true but I really wish that I could do it for myself." It's a subject that makes me sad. I know I could do some really great things if I could just get through the theory. I can draw, my maths is fine and my engineering knowledge is pretty damn good. I love design, aesthetics, materials and I know where the industry is heading. I just know if you left me alone with an exam paper I would be fairly fucking useless.

"Wow, you designed this? I assumed that you built it but ... wow. Elliot you are really good. This place is amazing." She pulls away from me to glance around at the building.

"Yeah, well like I say, there are only so many buildings I can build for myself so I am kind of limited to working on the other side of the plans. Its okay, really." I can see her formulating a thousand questions about how it is that I can function at all and right now I don't want to answer any of them. It's not like building and developing and running a business are completely free of the need for literacy skills but I make sure I have some really great people around me.

"But you read plans to execute them." Her statement is more of a question.

"Yeah, I can read drawings and numbers. I don't have to worry about design language because after all this time I recognize those words easily enough on the page. But there is more to it if I wanted to get qualified so ..." My words hang in the air and I wonder again if she will be happy with a builder for a husband. I shake it off, after all I have a pretty successful company and it is growing all the time. I have Christian and Dad to thank for the business side but the management and execution, that is all me and I am pretty fucking good at it. "Look, I wish I had an ounce of Christian's academic ability and I will never really understand how he could have walked away from Harvard like he did. Not that it wasn't the right choice for him at the time but because I would have given my left arm to be able to go."

"Elliot you are an intelligent and talented man. More than I could ever have hoped for." Placing a small hand on my face she smiles through her words. "Christian saw that being academic was not going to be the best use of his talents at the time. You also do not need to feel less adequate when you can do such amazing things."

"Yeah, well, I can't wait to have this discussion with your father the famous media boss and your brother the almost Masters student. They are going to think I am a big dumb bore who is only after your body." I know I am sulking a little bit and this is just a crisis of confidence. Dad has drummed it into me over the years that intelligence is not tied up with academic skill but I know that when other people know about me, I get judged. That bitch, Elena Lincoln is a fine example of that.

"Listen, you are going to be fine. They are going to love you as I do because you have so much more to offer the world than a diploma. If you were a big dumb bore then you could bet your ass I wouldn't be hanging around." I realize what she has just let slip and a smile hits my face like the fourth of July. She frowns at the change of mood. She doesn't even know she has said it but I heard it. _Love you as I do._

"So is it my money or my body that you're after Miss K?" I waggle my eyebrows at her in an effort to change the subject.

She laughs. "Oh definitely the body Mr G. Now how about bringing it up to the shower with me and see if you can't make me sing some more." At that I hoist her over my shoulder and head up the stairs with her squealing as i slap her naked behind.

An hour later, after a shower and a quick breakfast we are on the road heading back to her apartment. This time she drives as we chat about what we need to take to Barbados. My phone buzzes as we arrive out the front of her building.

"Gia, hi, what's up?" I climb out of the car. Kate goes to move away from me into the building.

"Hey, gorgeous. I got your message about Zeus. I will come by tonight and stay with you before you go. You know, give you a parting gift?"

"Um yeah, it would be great if you could move in tonight but I don't think I will be there. I'm going to stay in town with a friend so I can be at Sea-Tac early in the morning." Kate looks at me as if I have grown a second head. I reach out to touch her but her hands go up in front of her body as she fends me off. _Shit._ "You have your key right? You can let yourself in?"

Kate's mouth hangs open in shock then she mouths, _'she has a fucking key'_? _ Stupid Grey, big dumbass..._

"Come on, baby. Come home tonight and I promise I will make it worth your while. Then I will drive you out to SeaTac early tomorrow." _Jesus, Gia you haven't offered a booty call for months and you choose today to do it? Fuck._

"No, honestly, I am going to pack my stuff this afternoon and then I will head back into the city. I'll feed Zeus before I go okay? Oh and he will need a big run this evening. He will have been cooped up all day."

"Zeus is at the house? You didn't take him with you?" She knows that any other day Zeus would be right by my side at the building site.

I hesitate while looking sheepishly at Kate. "Ah, no. He doesn't fit into my girlfriend's sports car so I had to leave him at home." I am pretty sure there is steam coming out of Kate's ears and I know I am going to get a bollocking. This time, however, I think I probably deserve it.

Then Gia fairly screams down the phone at me, "Your girlfriend! Sportscar! You prick, why don't you just get your new chicky babe to come and sit with Zeus." _Oh, Gia is pissed now._

I pause. _This is bad. Real bad. Gia's pissed, Kate's pissed. I might as well cut my own balls off and send them one each._

"Well, she can't because we are going away on a holiday together," I reply with a cringe. There is another long silence.

"Great. Well, you have a nice time with your **_girlfriend_ **on holiday and I will be waiting here for you when you get home." Kate hears this perfectly as Gia's voice drips with sarcasm. I feel like such an idiot. _Why did I think this was going to be okay?_

"Okay, thanks Gia. See you in a couple of weeks." I hang up and put the phone in my pocket.

"Are you going to explain to me what that was about?" Kate asks, her arms folded defensively across her body while she taps her foot on the pavement. I look around and realize that I don't want to continue this out here in public.

"Inside." I grab her elbow and steer her into her apartment and I am hoping like hell that Ana isn't there to witness this showdown. All I can think is I am such a fucking idiot to think I could ask Gia to do this or that it would be remotely okay with Kate. She lets us into the apartment and storms over to the kitchen to put the kettle on.

"Kate what are you doing?" I am worried sick where this is going to go and she is making fucking Earl Grey?

"I'm making tea. Do you want some?" She's thumping around so much that I am certain something is going to get broken. She pauses after throwing the tea bags in the cups. "Well, explain yourself Grey."

_Oh, Christ._ "Look, Gia is an ex." She is paused with her back to me.

"Fuck. It's Gia Matteo isn't it? I've seen her in the society pages with you. And she still has a key to your place?" She turns on me accusingly.

"Yes," I reply. "We do have a genuine arrangement about looking after Zeus and it has never been an issue before."

"But the arrangement includes a quick fuck before you leave, right?" Now her eyes are cold with fury.

"No...well yes...but not any more." I feel like a cornered animal. My eyes are on the floor I am so overwhelmed with embarrassment. All I can do is whisper. "I'm sorry, I didn't think."

"Jesus Elliot, you didn't think. You dumbass." I flinch at her words as she spits them at me. She pushes past me and stomps off to her room. I follow after her and stand in the door as she angrily throws on a pair of jeans and a singlet. Then she sits down to put on a pair of converse before standing and stomping past me back out to the kitchen. She tries to finish making the tea but then knocks one of the cups on the floor and it shatters. Next thing I know she's on the floor sobbing.

"I have no idea why this hurts so much. You have no intention of sleeping with her, I know this. And she really is in the past for you, I get that. I just can't ..." She chokes on her sob.

"Sweetheart, no." I kneel down beside her and wrap my arms around her pulling her into my lap. "Please baby. I'm sorry. She means nothing. She is just a friend who looks after my dog when I'm not there. I'm so sorry. I didn't think." And I can feel my own tears._ Fuck, why does this woman get me so damn emotional?_ All I know is that I can feel her pain and it is pulling me apart.

"No, Elliot. She is some woman who you occasionally fuck, who looks after your dog. Who expected you to fuck her tonight before you went away. Who has a key to your house. Our house. Is she going to be sleeping in our bed?" She pauses for a moment and then I see a thought occur to her. "Jesus, did you live with her? Is that why she has a key and expectations?" Now the pain lances through my chest. _Fuck, why didn't I see this?_ Gia was part of that house, she is my tame architect, she helped me put my ideas on paper. But apart from that and a very casual sexual relationship there was nothing else.

"Kate, I'm sorry. No I did not live with her. Yes she has expectations that, no, I will not fulfill. Yes I imagine that she will be sleeping in our bed." Shit, that doesn't sound so good. The 'our bed' sounds wonderful but not having another woman there.

"Damn you Elliot. I don't want to be this woman. This stupid jealous irrational shrew." She smacks my chest and then buries her head. "I just don't want her in our room. It feels like a gross invasion of privacy."

"Sweetheart, how many guys have slept in your bed?" I ask as gently as possible, even though I don't want to know the answer. I am just hoping to make a point.

"No, don't you go there. No one who has ever slept in my bed has had a key to my apartment. That is not a fair comparison." She's right, that was unfair. This whole thing is unfair. I have to fix it.

"I will make another arrangement for Zeus. I could see if Mia would go out there, although she hates being on her own." I think about this for a moment. Mia has just arrived back in the country and probably doesn't want to be stranded alone at my place. Then there is Zeus, who needs to be looked after. He has his own expectations and Mia might not be so keen on taking him for a big romp through the countryside.

Then Kate sniffs as she looks at me and pulls her body away. "No, I am being unreasonable and Zeus needs to have someone who knows him well. But I swear Elliot, I will tear the bitch's arms off if she is in our room. Isn't there somewhere else in the house she can sleep?" It should shock me that she is laying claim to my house, my bedroom, my bed. But I am glad that she is thinking of it that way. That will be our home, where we will start our lives together. I have no doubt about that. We will raise our children there. Suddenly Gia cannot be a part of how she thinks about our home but I am relieved that Kate is backing down on this because the only other person I would ask to look after Zeus is my best friend, James, and he is going to be away for the next couple of weeks.

"I will call her and make sure that she doesn't. Baby thank you, I promise you I will never ask her again. I'm so sorry." She turns fully into my arms. "I love you and I love that you are already thinking of it as our place, our room, our bed." Then I do the thing I love the most and kiss her hair. She looks up into my eyes, and I feel like she is finally laying claim to me.

"You are mine Elliot Grey and you better make damn sure that the world knows that or..."

I let out a relieved laugh. "Or what...?"

The devil takes over my angel and she stands up, reaches into the kitchen drawer and pulls out a knife. My eyes widen in faux shock and then we both crack up laughing and fall into each others arms. I kiss her thoroughly and it is so tempting to drag her off to her room but I really do have to get to work.

"Listen babe, I will have to take a rain check on the tea. Are we good?" Bending to stare into her eyes I still feel uncertain.

Finally she nods and then slides her hands under my shirt and pushes it off my shoulders.

"What are you doing, I said I had to go?" But she continues to remove my work shirt leaving me with the t-shirt underneath.

"I am taking this. If I can't have make up sex with you then I want to have the smell of you on my skin today until you come home to me tonight." She puts the oversize shirt on and ties up the tails around her taut stomach. I know it is going to take an act of sheer willpower on my part to walk away. I roll my eyes at her.

"And what about me," I ask. "What do I get to help me through the day?" She looks up at me thoughtfully and then reaches around behind her neck and takes off the simple gold cross that she has been wearing ever since I met her. She slips it around my neck and fastens it. It looks ridiculously small and I feel ridiculously happy.

"I have had that a long time so take good care of it for me. For us." She whispers against my lips as she kisses me.

"Of course, m'lady." I feel like one of the knights of old and she is offering a token of her favor before I ride off to joust. I bow and she giggles while rubbing her fingers through my hair.

"Laters babe." I kiss her nose and then turn to go out the door. Just as I get to the doorway I hear her reply.

"Laters Elliot" And it feels like a big fucking I love you.


	24. Chapter 24

_******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**_

* * *

_**Do you pretend you're high **_

_**Pretend you're bored **_

_**Pretend you're anything **_

_**Just to be adored **_

_**And what you need **_

_**Is what you get **_

_**Don't believe in fear **_

_**Don't believe in faith **_

_**Don't believe in anything **_

_**That you can't break **_

_**You stupid girl**_

_**-Stupid Girl - Garbage  
**_

* * *

Around lunchtime my phone starts ringing off the hook. First is James calling from Haiti.

"Dude, how's it hanging?" James' dulcet tones hit my ears.

"Jimmy, how is the island?" James has been my business partner since the beginning. Grey Casey Development has grown exponentially since we signed up our first major renovation project with a crew of seven guys six years ago. Now we employ up to five times that number permanently working on multiple projects across four states with a roster of over two hundred casuals. Hence James having the original crew down in Haiti doing a month of charity build.

"Man, it's phenomenal down here. Beautiful one day, perfect the next." I know it can be anything but beautiful from personal experience. Post-earthquake Haiti has been nothing short of hard work for everyone involved and one hell of an emotional journey for both the locals and anyone working closely with them. "I just wanted to let you know that we are taking a few days break while we wait for that shipment from Atlanta. It won't be here until Saturday so the boys are going to take a well earned holiday starting Wednesday. We will be back to assist with the unload by the weekend."

"Sure thing mate. Make sure they have some fun." These guys have been working their collective buts off for the past couple of weeks and they deserve furlough. "Christian is picking up their tab." This is something that he and I have already discussed in Portland.

"Okay, thank Christian for me and tell him we need to catch up for golf when I get back. I'll call you in a couple of days." I smile, Christian hates golf but he makes exceptions for business and James.

No sooner have I got off the call to James when Jennifer, my housekeeper calls.

"Hi Elliot. It's Jennifer."

"Jenny, hi. Thanks for calling back."

"No worries, when are you leaving?" Jennifer is a marine biology student who lives with her mother most of the time but comes out and stays during the week to clean my place and run experiments in the bay three or four days a week. Her PhD is basically sitting somewhere off the small pier in my backyard so it suits us both.

"I leave tomorrow at noon. Babe, I need to ask you a favour." I am hoping that she won't mind doing this for me because the argument with Kate this morning damn near broke my heart. I would do anything to take that look off her face. "I wondered if you would be able to stay with Zeus full time for the next couple of weeks."

"Isn't Gia staying with him?" Not if I can help it.

"She will if you can't but I am really hoping that she won't have to." Please, please, please.

"Can I ask why?" The curiosity in her voice is burning a hole in my ear.

"Kate." I say simply.

"Kate?"

"Kate."

"Oh, so you don't want Gia in the house, huh?" She is sharp. I also happen to know that she doesn't particularly like Gia, with good reason.

"Listen, I know it is a lot to ask but it would really mean a lot to me. And Kate." I sigh.

"Will I like Kate?"

"Yeah, I know you will. I am counting on it."

"Can I bring Karen and Jake with me?"

"I would expect you to. You know they are always welcome. Just watch him around the water." I think I am about to seal the deal.

"No worries. I will pack everyone up and get us out there by dinner time." We discuss a few more of the details and then I make the phone call I dread. To Gia to cancel her. She doesn't take it very well and I know that we will have to reconcile somehow when I get back since we still have a host of projects under development together.

I am about to check in with my site manager when the phone rings again. It's Kate.

"Hey, sweetheart. How is your day?" The smile has spread across my face before she even says anything.

"Hey, babe. I'm exhausted but I think I have my bedroom mostly sorted. How is your day going?" Her voice is sweet and lilting sending an instant tingle down my spine and straight to my groin. I think I might be becoming predictable.

"Pretty good. I am almost done here so I will be going home to pack in about half an hour then I can probably be with you by five."

"Can you pack a tux?" What the...?

"Uh, sure, can I ask why?" She has really peaked my curiousity. Can't imagine why I would need one in Barbados.

"Dad, has a Press Club fundraiser cocktail event tonight and he and Mom want us to come. They want to meet you before tomorrow." Great, this should be fun. Not. "Do you mind?"

I know that this is really important to Kate. I just hoped that I could put this meeting off until the airport lounge tomorrow.

"No problem, baby. What time do we have to get there?"

'I have to drop Ana off at Sea-Tac at 5pm and then we need to be at the Sheraton by 7.30."

"Okay, I will aim to be back from Richmond around 6.30."

As soon as I hang up from Kate I call my dad for some reassurance and to check if he is going to this thing. After a short discussion about dinner last night I unload some of my insecurities about Sam Kavanagh and tell dad about the phone call.

"First of all, son, you don't have to apologise to Sam Kavanagh. You will be fine. Secondly, he called me the other day. He offered to shift some of his business my way if I convinced you to stop seeing his daughter."

Fuck. "What did you say?" I know that this would be a big deal in Dad's world.

"I told him that your love life was none of my business. In truth I wanted to see you and Kate together before I told you about it."

"And"

"I like her, she's feisty, smart, a real handful. Just what you need. More importantly I can see how you feel about her."

"Ah, how exactly do I feel about her?" I am curious how much I might be wearing my heart on my sleeve.

"The same way I felt about your mother when I first met her. Look, Elliot, this is not the way I do business and Sam has gone down in my estimation for having done this."

"Wouldn't you do the same if it was Mia?"

"Fair point. Are you defending him now?" I think about this long and hard. Family first, and one day I am going to have Sam as a father-in-law.

"Yeah, I guess I am. I want us to get along. Are you and Mom going to this thing tonight?"

"We are now. This is important to you, I get that. So it is important to us. Let's go meet your girl's family." I can hear the smile in his voice. "But Elliot, understand this. We liked Kate, your mother especially. You are going to have to tread carefully here. None of your usual...behavior. I don't want your mother invested in your relationship if you are not capable of being their for Kate 100%."

"Dad, Kate is different."

"I know son. Just remember that."

We walk into the Sheraton ballroom at 7.50 to an intimate gathering of around 750 of Seattle's finest. While the event is mostly media that extends to a range of high profile personalities and businessmen on the periphery. Press Club events are notoriously edgy with knives at thirty paces a regular feature. I know from the moment we enter the room that Kate and I are going to be big news. True to form, the invitation only paps surround us and hone in like bees to honey. I make sure that she is firmly in my embrace for every shot.

Unfortunately, I am aware that there will be a number of past flings in the assembled gathering who might decide to make their presence known to Kate. We have discussed this on the way here and have decided that we will just have to handle them together when the need arises. I made her promise not to be too far out of reach for the evening. Divide and conquer is not a strategy that we want turned on us tonight.

The evening is about finger foods and cocktails. The actual fundraising is the less intrusive kind with charity envelopes, pledge forms and a silent auction going on steadily in the background. Mostly this is about being seen. We make our way steadily towards the area where Sam Kavanagh is holding court. Kate is greeted by a range of people as we move through the crowd, most of whom I know or have met at other events. Once more I am amazed that she and I have not met at one of these thing before.  
"Katherine. Darling, you look wonderful. I am so glad you went with the cherry." A replica of Kate steps up and greets her with a warm hug. "And you must be Elliot. My, but you are quite a specimen. I can see why my daughter has that look in her eye." This bundle of Southern charm has to be Kate's mom.

"Mrs Kavanagh. I am delighted to meet you." I take her hand and kiss it. She simpers a little as she looks with a smile from me to Kate.

"Such lovely manners. Are you sure you're not from Georgia, Elliot?" Her eyes are wide with laughter and I instantly like her.

"No M'am but I do appreciate beauty when I see it."

"Enough of that stud." Kate swats me on the shoulder. "Mom, this is Elliot Grey. Elliot, my mom, Julie Kavanagh."

"Not Julie Kavanagh of JK Designs?" A familiar voice pipes up behind me. "My most favorite designer in the whole of Seattle." My mother descends on us and sweeps Julie into a warm embrace. Kate and I stand back with our mouths hanging open.

"Grace, darling, you look wonderful. Who made this stunning creation? Oh, that would be me." Julie laughs as she examines my mother with a look from head to toe.

"You know each other?" Kate look incredulous.

"Kate, I have been buying your mother's designs for years. I have always considered her a friend, now we have a reason to be even better friends."

"Mom, why didn't you say anything?" Kate is staring at her mother with her hands on her hips.  
"Darling, Grace and I are both delighted that you two lovely things have found each other but we don't want to influence this either way. Nothing would make us happier than to see you together but we made a pact when w e found out you were seeing each other. We will not be accused of being interfering mothers." Julie's approval is evident and I am totally floored by my mother's deception.

"Mom, you knew?" I am thinking back to the discussion yesterday with Mia in the kitchen.

Her eyes are sparkling with laughter and I suspect a tear or two, knowing Mom. "Baby, Julie called me straight away when she knew you were going with them to Barbados. Friends don't keep that sort of news a secret."

Now I am truly confused about all this stuff with Sam. If Julie is so happy that Kate and I are together, what the hell is Sam playing at? Next thing Sam joins us.

Julie takes it upon herself to do the introductions. "Sam, darling, this is Kate's Elliot." I really like her style. Sam shakes my hand with one of those power handshakes. He is testing my mettle, I can tell. I look him in the eye.

"Sir, it is good to finally meet you. Thank you for allowing me to tag along on this holiday. I hope that I am not intruding too much."

"Elliot. I think the womenfolk have made it pretty clear their thoughts on this. I am not sure you or I would have had any other choice, so no son, you are not an intruder at all." Shit, what happened to the guns at ten paces scenario that I had envisaged. Sam turns to Kate and gives her a quick kiss on the cheek then greets my mother warmly. "It is lovely to see you Grace. Where is Carrick?"

Well, this is rich. I have been stressed out about how to win over Sam Kavanagh for the past couple of weeks and here he is playing happy families with my folks? Dad walks up just then and kisses my mother, Julie and Kate then shakes Sam's hand. "Did I miss anything?"

I stare at my father in confusion. What the hell happened to the conversation this afternoon? I have no idea how things suddenly changed but somehow it has. Kate looks just as confused as me. She mouths WTF at me with questioning eyes. I shrug. Anyone would think that we were already family the way the four of them are carrying on.

After a couple of rounds of drinks the ladies are deep into fashion talk. Kate's brother Ethan has arrived and is talking with Sam so I pull Dad aside.

"Dad, what the hell is going on? You seemed pretty pissed about Sam's tactics this afternoon. Now you are suddenly best buds? I don't get it."

A look of concern floods Dad's eyes as Sam moves over to join us. He looks nervously from Sam to me. "Son, Sam and I spoke this afternoon. He has shared with me some news that is a little disturbing, stuff that I don't particularly want the rest of the family to know about, especially your mother. I do, however, think you should know, so Sam will tell you more when you get to Barbados. When he has shown you what he has, you and I will need to talk so Skype me from Barbados when you are ready. Just don't tell Kate anything yet."

"What the hell is going on, Dad?" My eyes are looking from Dad to Sam, both of whom look pretty grim.  
"Son, now is neither the time nor the place. After you called today Sam phoned me. We had a long conversation and Sam will tell you everything in the next couple of days. Let's just leave it at that for now."

"Is this about Christian?" I don't want to walk out of here not knowing what I am dealing with.  
"Partly. But I want to reiterate that I don't want your mother to know any of this, nor do I think Kate should hear what Sam has to say."

"Good luck with that." Sam and I say simultaneously before a conspiritorial and sympathetic smile spreads across his face.

Dad looks shocked and then laughs. "Yes, well, ultimately that is your problem. I want you to have a proper break, Son. You have earned it. Whatever this is, and no, Sam and I haven't been able to get a firm grip on it, but it can wait until you get back. I don't think there is much we can do but wait at this stage."

Sam looks at me intently. "Your Dad is right. And as long as I am out of the country at the moment it potentially lessens the threat." Now I am really confused.

"Someone is threatening you? And you don't want to tell Kate?" I want to throttle him.

"No, Elliot. They are threatening you and your family. I am just the weapon of mediation they are trying wield to do it." Oh shit, an exposure via media. Fuck.

"Carrick, Kate already knows some of this. It might help if we keep her in the loop. She is has a sharp analytical mind, she might be able to help." Sam pleads.

"Sam, if your daughter is about to be a part of my family I don't want her in the firing line. This prick might choose to come after her next."

"I think you might want to let Kate be the judge of that. And Elliot." Dad looks pretty grim but he eventually nods.

"Do what you think is best. Now given where we are, I think we should probably drop this discussion. I am not sure advertising the link between our families is such a good strategy at the moment." Dad looks set to move off.

"Everyone is going to know when the papers hit the stands tomorrow morning. There are photographers everywhere tonight."

"I don't think we can shut the door on your relationship but we probably don't need it to be known that both families are pleased about you two getting together."

This is getting more intriguing by the minute. I almost can't wait to get Sam alone, which seems really strange given how I have been feeling about him recently. Kate is looking at the three of us with a concerned and questioning smile. I don't think she can quite believe how the evening is going either.  
"Perhaps we should go our separate ways for the rest of the evening. Just in case." Sam is scanning the room as am I although I have no idea what I am looking for.

"Yes, I am going to take your mother home. Have a great trip and remember to call me. I want an update after you have talked." Dad draws me into a hug which only serves to ramp up my fear over this whole discussion. If there is a threat I want to know where it is coming from. "Have a good holiday, Son. Sam, take good care of my boy."

Dad pulls Mom away from her discussion and after a quick embrace and more promises to call they leave. Sam also draws Julie away with the reassurance that they will see us at the airport.

Kate goes off to the ladies room and I head to the bar for another drink not far away so that I have a sight line to the door. Even though my senses are on high alert and I have a thousand questions swirling around in my head I am glad to know that my families are now on the same page as far as Kate and I are concerned. While I wait for a drink I feel a hand on the small of my back. I turn around expecting to see Kate but instead come face to face with Elena Lincoln.

"Elliot, darling, I saw your mother as she was leaving. She said you were here. I must say I am surprised. I thought you had sworn off this sort of event." Her hand has traveled up to my shoulder and she is rubbing it slowly down my sleeve in a proprietary way. I have always hated this about her. She seems to think she has ownership of the Greys.

"Elena, how disappointing to see you."

"Now, now, Elliot. There is no need to be like that. I don't know why you have such animosity towards me, darling. After all I only have your best interests at heart. Speaking of which there is an angel here who might be worth you meeting."

"Not interested, Elena, never have been, never will be. " The barman has handed me my drink and taken in the peroxide blonde bombshell that has attached herself to me. She gives him a come hither look that is always part of her predatory repertoire. "Why don't you introduce him instead."

"That would be such a waste. I chose her especially for you." She has stepped in closer and I panic as I see Kate on her way back from the powder room. Placing my drink down on the bar I take her by both shoulders and push her firmly away.

"It is time to say goodnight, Elena." I turn to head over and meet Kate who has been intercepted by a small group of people. I can't see her for the moment except for a glimpse of her red dress. Elena grips my arm and pulls me back.

'Listen Elliot. You don't have to be so damn rude. I am just trying to be a friend to you. Christian has no problem with me so I don't know why you feel the need to be obnoxious."

I laugh. "Oh that is rich coming from you. You are my mother's friend and my brother's business partner. You mean nothing to me. I don't have to like you and I wish you would get it through your thick head that I don't want what you have to offer." I spit through clenched teeth as I remove her hand.

"Oh sweetie, I am not the thick one and you do want it even if you won't admit it to yourself. Do you think little miss red dress is going to give you what you need? Look at her Elliot, she couldn't do submissive if you held a gun to her head."

"What the hell makes you think I want submissive. I am not like my brother. I am not interested in your crap, Elena."

"Sshhh, baby. You don't want everyone to hear." She strokes my face pressing close enough to kiss me.

Just then I hear Kate's voice.

"Get your hands off him, bitch." With a quietly menacing voice Kate has moved in for the kill. "He said he's not interested." She slips her body in between us and wraps my arms around her protectively so that I am leaning down to her shoulder. I look Elena in the eye as I plant a wet kiss on Kate's bare skin.

"It's okay Kate, Elena was just leaving." Kate leans back into me rubbing suggestively and I know this is as much about sending Elena a message as it is about wanting me.

"Lovely to meet you, Kate, is it? Elliot she is delightful." She reaches into her clutch and takes out a business card. "You know Kate, that dress is exquisite, a JKD if I am not mistaken. Come and see me at my salon. If you want to pull of that color you might want to add some warmer highlights so you don't look so washed out. I will see you soon Elliot, take care." She turns around and heads off into the crowd as if she has just seen someone important.

"Bitch!" Kate looks at the card for a moment before tearing it up and dropping it on the floor. "I hate to litter but some garbage is too disgusting even for a trash can."

She turns in my arms and reaches up to hold my face. "I take it that was Elena Lincoln."

"Yep. How do you...?" I don't recall us talking specifically about her.

"Dad told me a little about her. Owner of Esclava Salons, Christian's business partner, your mother's friend." There is something else she knows that she is not telling me.

"Yeah and royal pain the ass. Don't like her, never have, but I tolerate her existence for Christian and Mom's sakes."

Kate thinks about this for a moment then leans in. "Don't worry, baby, I won't let the big evil witch get my man." She kisses me gently then pulls away. "Now, I have a great need to get out of this damn dress, Mr Grey. Think you can help me out?"

"Sure thing baby. Let's go home." Taking her hand I tow her out through the crowd but I continue to scan as I go. Not knowing what this threat is kills me and I would rather die than have anything happen to Kate.


	25. Chapter 25

_******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**_

* * *

_**And I don't know **_

_**Who to believe anymore **_

_**But there comes you **_

_**To keep me safe from harm **_

_**There comes you**_

_**To take me in your arms **_

_**Is it just a game? I don't know**_

_**-Just a Game - Birdy  
**_

* * *

The apartment is empty, Ana has gone to Georgia. It is just me and Kate and a few heady hours of bliss before we have to go to the airport. We fall in through her door, kissing, groping, and generally making a mess of our evening clothes. Once we are inside I pull back from her, our breathing is ragged and eyes blazing as we stare at each other. I lean my forehead against hers and hold her face.

"Stop, Kate. Let's just...slow down." I am almost gasping through a thundering heartbeat and rampant erection the quite frankly hurts. I straighten up and then turn to the door checking that it is locked and dead bolted. Kate looks at me curiously.

"Elliot what is wrong. You have been on edge since your parents left the ballroom." Her small hand is placed on my arm as she slides her heels off. Holding them in one hand she moves off down to her bedroom. She emerges a few minutes later in a short robe. I am standing in the middle of her kitchen texting.

"You all ready for tomorrow?" I signal towards the packed case by the door. She nods and moves past me to put the kettle on. She gives a disappointed glance at my phone.

"Yeah, was it urgent?" Her hands keep moving as she places tea bags into cups.

"Sort of. I just wanted to check that Mom and Dad got home okay." This makes her pause and she turns her body to look up at me. "I know...I just worry."

She shakes her head smiling. I have the Kate Kavanagh seal of approval for being a good son. We really need to talk but I am not sure it is a good idea until I have had a conversation with Sam.

Passing me a cup she walks out to the living room. I take a sip as the number on my phone rings.

"Hey, it's me. Yeah...we may have a problem...Not sure but you need to stay alert and stay in contact. There are a couple of things. I just had a run in with Elena at a Press club function. Nothing major but she was pushing and then she started gunning for Kate. Yeah. The other is unknown. I am going to find out in the next couple of days and when I do I will let you know. No, don't tell him...no not even about her. Let's just be vigilant. It could be anything but Dad is worried so it might be an organized attack. Yeah - have some extras at the ready and send someone out to Richmond. No, he's still in Haiti and I think I am going to need him. No, I am paying. Okay, man. Take care. And remember, anything changes, I want to know."

Kate has opened up her computer and is quietly typing in between sips of her tea. "Are you going to tell me what this is about, Grey or do I have to resort to torture to get it out of you?" I lean back on the kitchen bench and take another sip thinking about the best way to handle this.

"I take it you know that there is a threat against us." Her fingers pause for a moment but she doesn't look up. Her glasses are perched on the end of her nose as she works. How does she do that? How does she manage to make glasses, messed up hair, a bathrobe and typing look like the sexiest fucking thing on the planet. I shrug my dinner jacket off and place it over a chair. Slowly I move towards the couch and park myself down beside her. Looking over her shoulder I notice that she is writing some sort of journal entry about tonight. I presume things that were said, by whom, the encounter with Elena.

"You want to share?" She stops typing and turns the screen toward me. I shake my head. "Just tell me the highlights."

"Tonight was unusual, mostly in a good way. I want to remember that. But there were things that were off as well. I try to make notes on everything just in case it might be relevant later. You know, something I might have to follow up."

"So what was off?"

"Well, the secret conversations you were having with our dads. That was odd and the sudden acceptance by my father of all things Elliot. That one kind of threw me." I laugh.

"Yeah me too babe. What else?"

She pauses the cup on the way to her mouth. "You went on high alert after you spoke to my Dad, like you were waiting for something to happen. You still are?"

I shake my head and lean forward with my elbows on my knees. "Trouble is I don't know what I am waiting for. Your dad seems to know something though."

"Mmmm... I figured as much." She knows something, I knew it.

"You gonna tell me?" She studies my face for a while then shakes her head and then she tells me everything she knows. The leaks to her Dad, the photos, the threats to and files on me, Christian and now apparently my Dad.

"I think you need to sit down with Dad. He has only told me some of it. I think we need to do this together otherwise we are going to be jumping at shadows for no reason. We need facts." My sensible beautiful Kate.

I run an anxious hand through my hair. I feel so fucking impotent. "I just want to protect my family Kate." I look directly at her. "All of my family."

Her eyes hold mine for a moment. A steady blue gaze. Then she closes the lid of her computer and unfolds her legs moving into my lap. Her arms are around my shoulders and head, her hands in my hair, massaging and relaxing me. She tips my head up to look at her and she slowly slants her mouth across mine, gently licking my lips before sweeping her tongue inside. Her soft lips ease all of tension and she is pouring a world of passion into this kiss while her hands keep roving.

My hands remove the pins from her hair and I thread my fingers through her curls as the drop in layers around her shoulder. It is like warm silk in my hands as I pull her head firmly into our kiss. I slide my hands down her back and then to her front to undo her robe. As it falls off her creamy shoulders I take in with my touch the lacy bustier she is wearing. I press her away from me for a moment so I can see her. Oh, my Kate.

"Beautiful, always so fucking beautiful, Miss K." I murmur pressing my mouth against her neck. My hand slides down from her face, down her neck and around her breast, palming it gently through the silky lace. Perfect. She emits a small gasp in response that almost brings me undone.

Her curves are perfection and I trace each one as I gently push her to her feet. She goes willingly, her robe hanging open. Turning toward her bedroom she reaches back with her hand to me, her long legs clad in stockings that end in lacy tops half way up her perfect thighs. We walk hand in hand down to her room and I flip the lights out as we go. She has left her bedside lamp glowing casting shadows around her room. She leads me to the bed and then turns to face me beside it.

"I don't think we need these." Her fingers make short work of my dinner shirt and pants. By the time I have stripped off completely she has removed everything but the stockings. "Want me to keep these on." All I can do is nod, my mouth is so dry. Clothed, Kate is perfect, naked she is exquisite and my body which was already on alert is now painfully rigid, my erection straining towards her.

She takes my in her hand and begins to stroke. "Baby, I won't last." But she ignores my plea and drops to her knees to take me into her mouth. Her tongues snakes out of her mouth and around the head of my dick. Blowing air gently down the length of it has me pulsing in her hand and then she licks from base to tip before engulfing me in her mouth. Her tongues flicks around as she slides her mouth up and down my painfully hard cock and I struggle to resist fucking her mouth. I hold her hair in my hand so I can see her working me over.

I can't take it any more and I pull her up onto her feet before I can come in her mouth. Running my hands down her body I place one hand behind her back and the other on her waist as I kiss her, lowering her backwards onto the bed. She scoots back under the cover and holds out a hand to drawn me in. I go so willingly into her arms, lying half on top of the length of her body as I let my hands wander over her silky skin.

My kisses travel over face as I taste her with my tongue. She is spice and sweetness on my tongue making me groan with longing for more of her addictive taste. My pathway over body takes in the perfection of her long neck and the gentle slope of her shoulders. Her scent is incredible as I nip and lick across her collarbone and down to her perfect breasts. The small hard nubs of her nipples rub against my cheek as I try not to break contact working my way to the center of each breast to suckle her. Her moans and gasps are music to my ears, encouraging to take my time with her, to hold back my passion and simply love her.

"Elliot, please."

"What, baby, what do you need?" I murmur into her lips. I want her to tell me. I need so desperately to hear her ask for it.

Her skin is on fire as she presses her wetness up against my thigh. My hand travels down to her center finding her slick moist folds. My fingers slide easily inside her to find that sweet spot that elicits another gasp. "Say it, sweetheart. Tell me."

"I need...I need..." she is gasping in her need, pressing her pelvis up so that she can fuck my fingers. I pull out and tease her hard little clit. Her cream is thick and pungent, driving us both crazy and I can't resist a taste bringing my fingers up to my mouth and sucking them in. Her eyes widen and then she reaches up to kiss my in a wild thrashing of tongues. "I want you inside me. Now. I need to feel you fill me."

In a quick movement I am over her, my hips forcing her legs apart. She tilts herself up to meet me as the head of my cock teases her clit. Then I thrust hard and she cries out. Holding perfectly still I gaze down at her until her eyes open and hold mine and when I know she won't look away I begin to thrust in long slow movements that reach deep into her sacred spaces. She clenches around me, drawing me in until I am balls deep inside her. Her soaking wet pussy is a sweet tight hot grip around my girth as if she is struggling to fit all of me inside her. Each pull has her panting letting out teasing little moans into my mouth. Her hands are firmly on my hips, pulling me and then they move to my face and hair as she looks directly at me with lustful hazy eyes.

We kiss with renewed vigor as we fuck each other hard, straining to reach our climax. "Baby, come for me." I whisper and on command her muscles clench and pulse around me and my climax comes hard and fast, pumping rampantly into her, filling her completely. We call each others names into the night, as our sweat soaked skin slides against each other. Her orgasm goes on and on and I keep moving gently, semi -erect until she begins to come down with a whimper.

I hold my weight off her body as much as she grabs my head unwilling to let me move away. I have no desire to withdraw. I am exactly where I belong and the thought of making love to Kate for the rest of our lives seems like the answer to my unspoken prayers. Then I notice the tears falling down her cheeks. I kiss them away tasting each one. Somehow I know this is about being overwhelmed, not about sadness. "Me too baby." I whisper to reassure her. After all of the tension and emotion of the past few days, this is what we both need.

We make love again before we fall into a perfectly sated, exhausted sleep. The love of my life is in my arms and I just know that I have found my bliss.


	26. Chapter 26

**__****This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**_Maybe we should get away _**

**_Baby, we could leave this town together _**

**_Maybe we could find our place _**

**_We could make it (We're gonna make it, we're gonna make it) _**

**_Baby, we can get away And we don't have to wait to start forever _**

**_This could be our only chance, we should take it (We oughta take it)Baby, we should get away_**

_**-Get Away - Mitchel Musso  
**_

* * *

Early morning brings the crushing disappointment of waking up alone. The past twenty four hours have been a roller coaster of emotion with so many unexpected revelations. It seemed only fitting that we should find some solace in mind blowing sex but with every climax we withdrew from each other emotionally until in the end we slept, or rather didn't sleep, on either side of the bed, barely touching. It is difficult to put a finger on why but needless to say that while disappointed I am not surprised Elliot is not here right now.

Feeling shattered, both physically and emotionally I lie back against the pillows and examine the evidence. Our worlds have been flipped, first by my discovery of and reaction to Gia, then Dad's 180 on Elliot and all things Grey topped off by our run in with Elena Lincoln. The only constant in all of this is the incredible sex and Elliot's continued determination to declare his love every few minutes which is wearing my nerves thin. Not because I hate it but because I am starting to depend on it and that scares me.

With every revelation I fall for him more and more but I don't want to feel like this. I don't want to be that vulnerable. Great sex and happy times, that's my MO. I don't want to trust and have my heart broken so I treat sex like ice cream. I love it, even crave it but I don't expect it to be satisfying and nutritious. My problem is I am developing an addiction that I know I will live to regret later.

Last night's encounters only served to seed more doubts for me. There were the openly covetous stares from the assorted females as we made our way through the ballroom. Later I overheard a snide conversation between Crystal Leighton and Lindy Smith while I was in the ladies room. Seems they had both had wild passionate affairs with Elliot at some point in the not too distant past that they just couldn't wait to get all nostalgic about. From their conversation I could swear that they shared him. As I emerged from my cubicle I had to resist the urge to smack their smug faces.

After that little love fest I was on my way back to Elliot when I was approached by the Bellevue Frat Pack. A group of guys who, from what I know of them, were conceived for the sole purpose of wasting their family fortunes on their endless whoring and gambling sojourns to Vegas. They are only a year or so older than me and a complete waste of space by all accounts. Immensely popular with many of the equally vacuous, born-to-be-trophy-wives that I went to school with, they have never been on my radar, nor I theirs. Suddenly because I am with Elliot they seem to have decided I am fair game propositioning me for a menage, my choice of partners, as if that would be the next selection off the sexual menu once Elliot got bored with me.

None of this surprises me. The kink, the blatant disregard for human decency or the bitchiness. This is rife in certain circles of the upper echelons of any society. Boredom and money are a dangerous and toxic mix. The fact that this is all sitting somewhere in Elliot's not so distant past serves as both a warning and a reminder that even if he is genuine now, the shelf life on his feelings is likely to be short.

For now, I will take Barbados, and all it has to offer me and then I will have to be prepared to walk away. Never mind that I already feel possessive of him. A byproduct, of his repeated attempts at throwing tantalizing happy family scenarios in my path. The worst part of all of this is knowing that I already love him. For every aspect of his sexual life that I hate he has shown me other aspects of himself that my heart has no defense against. His intelligence, his humor, his creativity, his devotion and loyalty, his philanthropy. Who could not love him? I just know that in reality I am standing at the end of a very long line.

Then there are these threats that are hovering ready to destroy his family. I know that I will help him. I couldn't possibly walk away from this if there is something I can do to help. So I wonder if his agreement to accept my help doesn't mean that he and his family are ensuring my silence. Regardless of how badly it may end, and I have no doubt it will end badly between Elliot and me, I won't ever use any of this for a story, I am not a heartless bitch.

Dad's father-of-the-groom bullshit last night has me on edge as well. I can tell he isn't about to let the possibility of a great story drop. He is playing a game that I don't trust and would rather not be a part of. I wonder how long I might have before I am told what a career-limiting move it would be to suppress information.

Feeling lethargic I get up and move out to the kitchen to find Elliot entering the apartment, coffee in hand, returning from an early morning run. He strides across the room, stopping to plant a light kiss on my forehead before unloading bagels and cups on the kitchen bench.

"Morning, gorgeous." His remote smile seems a little automatic, not the full-blown knock your sox off sexy Elliot Grey grin I have become used to. I pick up a bagel and a cup and go and sit on the couch in front of my computer.

"I missed you this morning." My eyes are focused on the screen as it boots up. I don't want him to see the tears that are threatening. He is focused on the morning paper.

"Sorry, I'm not good at staying asleep. Just felt like I need to burn off some energy." Like three times last night wasn't enough of a workout for you? Once more I keep my eyes on the screen while biting my lip hard.

"We made the paper. I'm going to have a shower." He walks past me all but throwing the paper in my lap. Luckily he doesn't look back as the tears begin rolling down my cheeks. What the hell is wrong with him? I look at the photo of us smiling at the cameras and realize my worst fears. Now that we have gone public he isn't interested any more. Suddenly Barbados feels like a noose around my neck.

Later that afternoon I am curled up in the seat next to Elliot on the plane with my brother Ethan in front of us reading an eBook. Elliot has a laptop computer open on the tray table in front of him, he is working on a program that looks like a complicated flight deck and wearing full headphones not just small ear buds. I have been asleep while he started it and I am intrigued by how complex the process seems to be that he is doing. He keeps opening a window and and adjusting the numbers then he presses a play button and listens. I tap him on the shoulder and he pulls his headphones off and looks down at me.

"Sorry babe, I didn't realize that you were awake." He leans over to give me a quick peck all hint of his bad mood gone.

"Only just, how long was I out?" I ask, yawning.

Glancing down at his watch he says, "We've been flying for about two hours."

"Oh. So what are you doing?" I ask indicating the computer.

"Looping a bass track," he turns the screen to give me a better view. "I'm testing out a new version of some software that an old high school buddy has been developing in San Francisco."

"That explains the headphones." I reply. He immediately takes them off and hands them to me. I hold one side up to my ear and he plays the track to me. The music sounds really good and my mouth makes a wow shape. "This is great. Did you do this?"

"Uh huh." He manipulates a couple of things on the screen and the track changes completely. The patterns merging and dancing on the screen match the music.

"Who is it?"

"Just something I did in the studio the other day." He takes the headphones back and saves the work he has done.

"That's you? Wow. That's really cool." I am genuinely impressed. He explains what he is doing. "How much is actually you playing?"

"Only eight bars. The rest is the program doing the looping."

"But you have organized where the loops are taking place and how they are mixed together?"

"Yeah, it is pretty intuitive software so it is really easy." As he explains some of the technical aspects of what he is doing I am lost. His brain and his fingers are going at a million miles per minute cutting and pasting blocks of color and then tweaking numbers as he shows me the intricacies of what he is doing. I don't understand most of it and I am deeply impressed at how easy he makes it look.

"Do you have any of your recording with you?" I ask.

He smiles and takes his iPod out of his pocket. "Here, there are two tracks here that are just me and four that are the band from the work crew. Take your pick."

I place the ear buds in and settle back into my seat to listen as he puts the headphones on to work on his project again. About twenty minutes later I tap Ethan on the shoulder and pass the iPod over. He listens for a while and then he looks back at Elliot and reaches over to give him a fist pump.

"This is really good, man. Where do you guys play?" Ethan asks as he hands back the ipod.

"A couple of bars around Seattle. Nothing major and not as often as we would all like."

"Let me know when you have your next gig. I'd love to come."

"You should come up to the house and see the studio."

Ethan looks at me. "He has a studio in his house. Fantastic."

"Ethan was a member of the drumline in college. Fancies himself behind a kit." I roll my eyes and I can see the enthusiasm on Ethan's face. I can imagine that if Ethan and Elliot get the opportunity they will play music all day and all night. Somehow the idea has a large amount of appeal to me.

"Shame you're not musical but hey, even drummers are welcome." Elliot says I almost choke with laughter.

Ethan smirks, "Yeah, yeah, drummer jokes are the lowest form of humor man. So you play bass?"

"Yeah, but anything with strings really. Guitar, uke, banjo."

"Sure, what's the difference between a banjo and a trampoline." Ethan is in high spirits now.

I know this one. "I know, you have to take your shoes off before you jump on a trampoline." I giggle. "An oldie but a goodie."

Elliot laughs. "But seriously man, any time you want to come up for a jam let me know. The guys come around every couple of weeks. It's a blast. Sometimes we just play and sometimes we record. You'd enjoy it and you'd be welcome to join in. I've got a kit in the studio."

"Yeah, what is it?"

"I've got a Tama StarClassic with Sabian cymbals and Paragon hi-hats. I've also got a midi kit but I prefer the live sound."

"I'm there, man. Have you heard Kate sing? You ought to record her."

I think about last night in the studio. "Yeah, we did a little Civil Wars last night. I have every intention of getting her to record. It was fantastic."

My mouth drops open and I sit up in my seat. "No way. I am not a singer."

They both grin at me. "Yes you are baby. You were fantastic last night. We were. I really want to do some more of that with you." There is not much that scares me but public music performance will do it. Does he really think I can sing or is he just being kind?

"No. I get performance anxiety with music. Freeze completely." He shakes head at me but I am adamant that this is something that is beyond my capabilities.

"How come you can do the public speaking thing and have everyone eating out of your hand but you never sing? Not even at family parties." Ethan is digging me in the ribs. "Has she shown you the valedictorian speech, Elliot? She was amazing."

"No, she promised she would. Even mentioned that you would video it for me but then nothing. What's with that?" Elliot asks him.

"Guys, performance anxiety here!" I need to put a stop to this discussion and I think Elliot takes pity on me.

"One day baby, I am going to record you and me singing together. But when you are ready." He gives me a reassuring kiss on the top of my head while Ethan rolls his eyes at us. I lift my face up for a proper kiss and for the first time today I feel like he is back with me.

"Guys, get a room! This not what I came on holiday to see. Please." He turns back to face the front of the plane, puts his headphones back on and opens up the ereader again.

Elliot and I look into each others eyes and I know that I am searching for reassurance. With a sad smile Elliot leans his head back against the seat.

"You know this is going to be the longest flight ever don't you?" He whispers to me. I grin and signal towards the bathroom. He laughs. "Keen on joining the mile high club, Miss K."

"Aren't you already a member?" I say and his eyes widen in mock horror.

"How did you know?" Somehow I am sad but not surprised. And then he shocks me. "It's an exclusive member only club in Seattle. Christian and I have been members for the last couple of years. And no, I have never done it on a plane so you would be a first."

Oh, I mouth and then I recline my seat back with a smile pulling a blanket over my body. The upgrade to first class is Elliot's contribution to the trip since my parents have already booked and paid for the accommodation. He lies back as well and we gaze at each other. His hand reaches out and touches my face. "Sleep baby. It's a long flight."


	27. Chapter 27

_******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**_

* * *

_**From the moment I wake, to the moment I sleep **_

_**I'll be there by your side, just you try and stop me **_

_**I'll be waiting in line, just to see if you care **_

_**Oh! Did you want me to change? Well I changed for good **_

_**I want you to know that you'll always get your way I wanted to say **_

_**Don't you shiver, shiver **_

_**Sing it loud and clear **_

_**I'll always be waiting for you**_

_**-Shiver - Coldplay  
**_

* * *

Hours later we are racing through Bridgetown towards our beachfront accommodation at Sugar Hill. Kate's parents have booked exclusive use of a five bedroom villa with beachfront views and a private pool. On arriving we settle into our room and take a quick shower before meeting everyone downstairs for cocktails. A gentle breeze coming off the water provides welcome relief from the heat as we sit out in the evening air.

"You kids settle in alright?" Kate's mom asks as she hands me a gin and tonic.

"Yes, thank you Mrs Kavanagh. This is a beautiful location." Taking Kate's hand I stare out towards the ocean with a smile. I just hope something magical can happen here.

"Please, Elliot, call me Julie." She grins at us indulgently as if seeing something special for the first time. I want to believe that she is but I can feel Kate's heart is not in it.

"Okay...Julie. Thanks again for allowing me to tag along." _Not that I gave you any choice._

"Yes, well, I don't think Kate would have had it any other way." Sam sounds pretty gruff and disapproving which I will put down to protectiveness of his baby girl. Today has proven to me that Sam Kavanagh is far from okay with me and Kate, in spite of the show he put on for my folks last night. It could just be about us sharing a room or the speed of our relationship. If he only knew how much Kate is holding back.

"Daddy, please. Be nice."_ Don't waste your breath, Kate._ Sam I can handle, it is Kate that I worry about. Since last night all I can think about is how she is stepping into the firing line by being with me. I don't want her hurt and it seems that my past indiscretions and our relationship has painted a target on her back. Being here doesn't seem like the smartest move I have ever made.

"Now - the house chef is cooking up a light meal tonight for us to eat in. I figure we should take it easy tonight before we start sightseeing tomorrow. Or whatever it is that y'all want to do." Julie's soft southern tones are a calming influence. She smiles at us - a lot.

"Sounds great, Mom." Kate takes a deep sip of her drink. "Oh, that is so good."

Ethan wanders out to the alfresco and picks up his drink. "Oh, nice, that hits the spot." He grins at us all. "Well, I wonder what the poor people are doing?"

"I think they are all on Haiti." They all look at me with their mouths open. "Sorry, I didn't mean...its just that I spent three months with my crew on Haiti helping with the rebuild after the earthquake. I keep meaning to find a way to get back there but I just haven't been able to find a gap in my calendar. I sometimes feel a bit guilty."

"I know what you mean." Kate replies, "The paper rallied for food and clothing donations from students and their families immediately after the quake. After two months Kavanagh Media funded a group of us to go down there to help out as Red Cross volunteers for two weeks. We ran features on it for a month after we got back but I have always felt bad that I haven't been able to go back. How did you fund it?"

"James and I paid everyone's travel expenses and Christian paid their wages while they were there plus materials for the build. He came down for a few weeks as well. That was about a year ago after a large part of the clean up had already been done. The rebuilding program is ongoing. It will be years before they recover from what they lost and there are still so many people in camps waiting for permanent housing. We rotate a crew through there every four months for a couple of weeks to be part of the process but in that first wave we took five crews down."

"How many crews do you have?" Ethan hands out a bowl of nuts to me. I take a few.

"Seven or eight depending on the market. At the moment there seven permanent crews of about four people and then we hire in casuals on top of that. At the moment I've got 3 major developments on the go so we have hired in another 25 guys to take up the slack."

"Impressive. How do you maintain the green agenda with that many projects at once?" Ethan asks.

And then we are off into a discussion of my favorite topic. Julie and Ethan are grilling me as if I am going for a job interview, which I guess in a sense I am given ultimately I want to be with Kate. She joins in with great interest to both support and interrogate me but I notice that Sam sits back for most of the conversation and observes as if he is waiting for me to trip up. It's unnerving. Eventually we move inside the villa for dinner and Julie leans over to me at the table.

"Elliot, you have the same cross as Kate. Are you religious?" she asks. I had forgotten that she had given me the necklace and I glance at her as I finger it gently before I reply.

"No, this is Kate's. I forgot to give it back to her." Julie's eyes widen as I unclasps it and stand up to refasten it around Kate's neck. "Thanks babe." I lean over and give her a quick peck on the cheek.

"You didn't answer my question, Elliot. Are you a religious man?" Julie looks up at me expectantly.

"Not particularly, I prefer to think of myself as ethical and rather than spiritual." I am trying to be as diplomatic as possible.

"A good answer my boy." Sam offers with an approving smile. "Too many wars are fought in the name of organized religion but I will not deny my wife's right to believe in a higher power. I think I have found myself thanking a deity once or twice in my life." We all laugh at the innuendo and I relax back in my chair. For a moment I make the mistake of thinking Sam is easing up on me. Then I catch a darker look in his eyes. _You haven't finished testing me yet, have you, Sam?_

After dinner, Kate and I elect to go for a swim in the pool. Ethan joins us for a while and we talk more about the Seattle music scene, trading tales about gigs we have seen over the years. We all like similar music and find that we have been to many of the same concerts over the past couple of years. _I wish I had known you earlier, Kate but then I wouldn't have been ready for you. I would have completely blown it by being an asshole and cheating on you._ _It would have destroyed you. _She knows this. I am going to have to work harder to make her believe in me.

She swims over to me moving in front of my body leaning back against me as we all talk. I immediately harden which she aggravates by rubbing her bikini clad cheeks against me. I groan a whisper in my ear, "I know what you are doing?"

Julie chooses that moment to walk out and sit down on the side of the pool dangling her feet in the water. Kate tries to move away from me but I grab her and pull her back in front of me. Feeling awkward I realize that I can't get out of the water and my little minx is cuddling into my body making it worse. I flash Ethan a desperate look. Grinning he finally talks Julie into going for a walk down to the beach.

"Shit, I thought they would never go." I let out a long breath. "Jesus Katie, what you do to me."

"And what would that be Mr Grey," she whispers coquettishly, batting her eyelashes at me before swimming away. Shaking my head with a moan, I swim after her, pull her under the water and plant my lips firmly on hers letting her feel the full force of my need. We emerge out of the water to take in air hardly break from our passionate kiss. She wraps herself around me grinding her pelvis into mine. I reach down to sweep her bikini bottoms aside and thrust my fingers into her warm walls. Her gasp says it all as I push two fingers inside her and quickly flick her clit. Her need must have been hovering all day because she detonates quickly around my fingers. Her urgent hands release me from my shorts and she impales herself on me. The pent up frustration of the plane trip and the last couple of hours of making nice with her family have added up to the need for an incredibly quick and powerful release.  
We take our time coming down from our orgasms, our arms wrapped around each other and foreheads pressed together.

"Jesus, Katie, you are making a believer out of me." I smile and she giggles. "That is the sweetest, goddamn sound in the world, you know that?" Still holding her close we kiss.

"Let's get out of here and go continue your conversion up in our room." She whispers into my mouth. We pull ourselves together and move quickly through the villa to our room. Within seconds we are naked and on the bed kissing. Her soft golden skin glistens with a light sheen of perspiration and I love how she is completely comfortable with her body. The mountain of soft white pillows provide a prop that I lean myself back against while Kate straddles my lap. Lowering herself down on me her hands are fastened to my face as she kisses me thrusting her tongue inside my mouth.

Moving together in a slow languid motion our bodies don't take long to become slick with sweat. I hold her hips watching her carefully as her passion rises. A quick flick of my thumb over her stiff little nub and she takes me with her into an incredibly intense and explosive ripple of orgasm that leaves us both breathless. Once again I am struck by how perfect she is for me. How perfect we are together. I need to be perfect for her.

Holding her firmly against my body we lounge back with me still inside her. I sense that it won't be long before I am hard again and it amazes me how ready she is as well. Our hearts are both calming down slowly but still pounding as she lifts her head and begins to plant soft wet kisses on my chest. I roll her on to her back and thrust hard into her, slamming against her in long slow strokes of desperate need. She is with me all the way, pushing back and calling out my name as she comes. Two more thrusts and I join her.

"Katie! Oh fuck!" I am trying not to collapse my weight on top of her I pull out to roll onto my back taking her with me. "Woman, if you keep this up you are going to put me in hospital."

"What, feeling the burn Mr Grey? Must be your extreme old age that is making it difficult for you to keep up." I laugh with my hand over my eyes. For the first time I am actually feeling our age difference. Not that it is huge but I am aware that it is a bigger difference for us than for Christian and Ana.

"Twenty nine is not old, thank you very much. I can't help it if you require a more experienced man."

"Yes you have eight years more experience than me. You really are old, aren't you? Cradle robber." She laughs hitting me with a pillow. Fending it easily I push her back to tickle her making her giggle and breathe hard then I kiss her and look at her seriously.

"Age doesn't really make a difference does it?"

"No, I love a man with experience." Instantly, a shadow passes over both of us. The fucking white elephant in the room. My experience, my reputation. She is so young, starting out in her adult life and I am smothering her. Wanting something that she isn't ready for. She has a career path that she has been planning for most of her life. Everything is mapped out and settling down is not part of that yet. Even if _**she**_ was ready, she doesn't believe that**_ I_** am and why should she? Nothing in my life has led anyone to the conclusion that I would want a commitment. Hell, even my own father has questioned whether I could be faithful. _What a fucking mess._

I get up off the bed and go through to the bathroom. Part of me doesn't want to have this discussion now and ruin our holiday. I take a quick shower and do my teeth, donning boxers before moving back into the room to see that she hasn't moved. Lying still with her arm across her face for a moment I think she has gone to sleep. Then I notice her tears.


	28. Chapter 28

**__****This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**_So far, I've fallen apart_**  
**_ And we lost transmission it was broken from the start_**  
**_ So far, I've thrown it away_**  
**_ Can we get second chances if the first one never came?_**

**_ And I will broadcast to you_**  
**_ Across the length of this room_**  
**_ Because the distance between_**  
**_Is much too far to travel through_**

**_-Broadcast - Meese_**

* * *

There is nothing for it, no excuses. Elliot Grey is a man whore. Ask any female in Seattle, many of my so-called friends included, and they will tell you the rumors are true. That is part of his attraction for many of them. And a huge element of risk. _Am I as bad as they are? Wanting to tame the bad boy? How fucking naive can you be Kate?_ Of course, people in glass houses and all that...I have my own reputation as a tease and a flirt but the difference is that mine is kind of localized. His is almost global.

Why the hell am I crying? I have known this about him since before our first meeting. I knew damn well what I was getting into. I just couldn't protect my heart. Every time he touches me, looks at me, whispers my name, I fall for him a little more and I don't want to.

He sighs and moves my arm to look at me. He looks nervous, worried, ashamed. In an instant he crosses the room to his jeans, pulls out his wallet and removes a piece of paper. Silently he hands it to me. When I unfold it I realize I am looking at his latest medical tests.

"A bill of clean health? Now you choose to show this to me?" I look at him with a sad smile. This just seems like a sick kind of joke. "I kinda figured you were as good as your word on this one, Elliot?"

"Yeah, only you would trust me on this but not on how I feel about you." I can't miss the bitterness in that statement. "I just wanted you to know before we even have this conversation." He looks really sad and I reach up and take his hand pulling him back on to the bed. He sits on the edge but won't look me in the eye. Shit what is this?

"Elliot, I trust that what you are telling me right now is true. And I don't really care what you've done in the past." I am trying to put a confidence behind my words that I simply don't feel. This holiday will end and we will go back to our lives in Seattle. Maybe we will date for a while and then it won't be long before he takes up with a new Gia or Kate. I am just another notch.

"Kate, you've probably heard things about me. About my past. I don't even know where to start to get ahead of the rumors except to say that a lot of it isn't true." His eyes are on mine and I can see that he is willing me to believe him. The message there is to have faith in him but I don't have enough faith in myself to keep him. "I have been in situations in the past where you would expect that I would have ... taken advantage. Most of the women involved probably hoped that I would and were disappointed enough to make up shit that didn't happen. It never bothered me enough to do anything about it, I figured it was...anyway, I wish to hell that I had said something, done something, so that you wouldn't be doubting me. I am no saint but I am not as bad as people would have you believe. I just want you to know that."

What the hell is he talking about? I can't help but think it must be bad if I am getting this kind of pre-confession bullshit. The justification before he tells me his version of the truth? Do I accept this? Do I really want to have blind faith in this man?

"Elliot, whether I want to believe you or not is irrelevant." The tears start afresh. "The point is that this is new and intense and we are both playing with fire. Sooner or later it will burn out and I won't be able to hold you. I know you think this is love but..." His face screws up in pain and he holds his head in his hand.

"Fuck this Kate. I don't know what I am supposed to do to convince you. This is different. You are different." He is working up a head of steam and my instincts tell me to withdraw but I don't. I am angry that he won't back off.

"What do you want me to say Elliot? That I love you too? And then what? Will you give it a second thought as you stomp my heart into the floor on your way out the door? How long before the next piece of tail takes your fancy? Don't you get it? I. Can't. Hold. You. It doesn't matter that you think this is love. In the end I won't be enough for you and it damn well hurts already. Can't we just enjoy this for now? Why do you want to crush me as well?" Sobbing I sink to the floor beside the bed, clutching my stomach.

His body is frozen as he watches me in horror. The disgust at my outburst is written all over his face. Damn him, I have turned into exactly the person I didn't want to be and as much as I love him I hate Elliot Grey right now.

"I'm sorry." His voice is no more than a whisper. He hasn't moved and he won't look at me. "I can't change my past and it seems that you won't let me change my future. I get it. I can't make you love me. I think I should go."

His words bring me up short. _No, no, baby, don't do this, don't go. _I don't want it to be over yet and I am frantically trying to find a way to stop him from walking out the door.

"Elliot, this is not about me not loving you and I don't want you to go." I look up at him and he looks so defeated that my heart aches for him and I can't believe that I am opening myself up to this. "We could still have two weeks of fun in the sun. Enjoy each others company and work this all out when we get back to Seattle. You don't need to go."

Weighty silence hangs between us for a while before he stands up and walks out on to the balcony. My eyes follow him, terrified that he is actually going to leave. His body is double over as he leans his elbows on the rail of the balcony. _I can't watch you leave_. Wrapping the sheet around me I stand up and walk into the bathroom to shower. I figure my tears cannot be heard from here.

When I emerge from the bathroom I am relieved to find he is still there, looking out into the dark. I don a light nightdress and walk out to join him. For a while we are both perfectly still, taking in the evening air.

"Why don't you just tell me about this notorious past and then we can start fresh. Clean slate between both of us."

Now I am dredging my memories to see what I might want to confess to. My life is pretty tame though. There have been a few guys I would class as boyfriends before him. One was the guy I lost my virginity to in high school. That was a disaster but not something I am deeply ashamed of. The other two were guys I befriended at college. In both cases we dated exclusively for about five months before they decided to move on and left me with a broken heart. There was an insignificantly small string of one night stands but most of the time I had Ana or Jose or Levi to rescue me from myself. My problem is that when I party I drink, and when I drink I flirt, and a lot of guys take that as a big flashing 'green light means go'. I don't mean to tease but I do, regularly. The only other guy I thought about having a relationship with is a good friend of Ethan's but Ethan got pissed off and we both agreed it would be too weird.

Elliot is keeps focused out to sea, trying to decide what to say, I guess.

"I wish we could just agree not to talk about our pasts. It would be a lot simpler." He shrugs. I shake my head and I place an arm around his broad shoulders.

"Baby, whatever it is, you have already admitted that it isn't as bad as I might have heard." I smile hopefully, and right now I am wondering how much I really want to know.

"No, I guess not. But not tonight. Tonight, we are both tired and I really just want to sleep with you."

I smile at him, knowing that this is an avoidance tactic. _We will talk Grey, and then this shit won't hang in the air between us. And when you decide it is time to go I will be brave about it._ Because I don't want to be that girl.

He stands and pulls me into his arms. His hands slowly trace down from my face, down my neck, my shoulders and arms. My skin tingles wherever he touches drawing me into his spell. I expect him to begin his usual seduction but he his kisses feather across my forehead, my eyelids, my cheeks, my jaw. Not taking but giving. Finally his lips very gently touch mine before pulling back. Stepping away he takes my hand and we walk back inside climbing silently into bed. We don't hold each other probably because it is too hot, maybe not. Instead we silently face each other in the dark holding hands.

Neither one of us is sleeping but we are both feigning it. Once again I can feel him withdrawing emotionally and it saddens me. _This is what I want, isn't it? No more declarations of love?_ Something about our conversation tugs at the back of my consciousness. When I wake in the morning I realize how high the sun is and that I have slept through the morning and Elliot is nowhere to be seen.


	29. Chapter 29

**__****This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**_Cause I can't make you love me, darling_**  
**_ If you don't_**  
**_ You can't make your heart feel_**  
**_ Something it won't_**  
**_ Oh, here in the dark_**  
**_ In these final hours_**  
**_ I will lay down my heart_**  
**_ If you feel the power, but you won't_**  
**_ Oh, you don't_**

**_-I Can't Make You Love Me - Bon Iver (version)_**

* * *

The first rays of light are glancing off the sparkling water as I pound the sand, having not slept. When I woke we were still in the same position, holding hands. Kate's tear stained face barely stirred as I slipped out of our room before sunrise.

Now I am trying desperately to deal with the tumultuous emotions coursing through my body. I don't think I have felt so completely useless in my life. The thought of failing at the only relationship that has ever really mattered to me is bringing me undone. Pain is everywhere and my heart is threatening to burst through my chest as I sprint the final 50 back to where I started. Stopping suddenly I double over, hands on my knees, chest heaving as I try to gasp in air. I want to cry, curse, hit something. In the end my body convulses and I throw up on the sand, dropping to my knees my body heaving.

"Elliot, Elliot, sweetheart, are you okay?" Julie appears beside me, seemingly out of nowhere and drops to her knees crooning in that soft lilting voice as she rubs my back. This will go down in history as one of the most surreal moments in my life. My soon to be ex-girlfriend's mother comforting me on a beach in Barbados while I cry like a fucking baby. "Shhh, sweetie, breath, just breath."

I am not sure how much time passes before I start to get myself under control. To her credit, Julie doesn't ask any questions, she just talks me through the process of taking one breath at a time, seeming to know that this is all I can cope with right now. My body is shuddering and aching but I embrace the physical pain as it serves to block out the emotional for even a moment. How fucking ironic would it be if I am actually having a heart attack? Eventually I sit back my head bent between my knees, my thumb and forefinger pinching the bridge of my nose as I I try desperately hold back any more tears. Don't be such a baby, Grey, she doesn't fucking love you, get over it. Julie doesn't leave my side, she just drapes a comforting arm lightly across my shoulder.

"Do you wanna tell me about it? I don't want to pry into your personal life but I heard you two fighting last night."

"Julie, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come. I don't want to ruin your holiday." My voice is cracking and I am in serious danger of blubbering again.

"If it is any consolation, I know my daughter, Elliot. She loves you." _Yeah, right._

"I love her."

"Have you told her that?" _Almost every damn moment of every day since I met her. That is the problem. I should have just kept my stupid mouth shut._

"Like a cracked record."

"Ah, then this isn't about love, it is about trust." Why are mother's always so bloody insightful.

"I don't know what to do except walk away. Leave her to get over me. She doesn't want me."  
Julie gives a little wry laugh that makes me frown.

"Did she tell you she doesn't want you?"

"No, but she doesn't want me to love her. She wants me to back off."

"But you don't want that?" _Dammit, I don't know how._

"No, I want...her...forever. I can't explain..."

"Honey, you don't have to. The heart wants what the heart wants. The only question I have for you is as a mother. Is there any reason why she shouldn't trust you?" _Yes...no...a million that don't even fucking count._

"A loaded question. No, there is no reason why she shouldn't trust me. Now that I have met Kate, I know there is no one else for me. But she is worried about my past and I don't really blame her." Julie takes a deep breath beside me.

"She has good reason not to trust." I hang my head, Julie's disapproval weighing heavily on my shoulders. "Not for the reason you think." _What?_

She hesitates for a moment before continuing, "I am going to tell you something in confidence and maybe you will understand. When Kate was very young, Sam cheated on me. My husband has always been a very handsome man, a virile man. We fell in love young, straight out of college. I was pregnant with Ethan before we got married but our fathers made Sam do the right thing as soon as they found out. We were mostly happy, and he was a young star on the rise in the newspaper world. It wasn't long before television came knocking on his door. Soon he was off all over the country as a correspondent. A glamorous life for a young man and somewhat easy to forget the wife and kids at home. Women threw themselves at him, flirted with him and I had no choice but to trust him. Finally temptation got the better of him and he had a very brief affair. When I found out, I didn't take it very well. Kate would have been around four years old, Ethan was at school. I knew this woman, had met her at functions, knew where she lived. Irrationally I wanted to confront her, tell her to leave my man alone. Unfortunately, when you are being hurt like that it is not easy to be rational so on the day I chose to confront her I took Kate with me."

My body tenses up. _Why the hell would she do that?_ She catches the question in my eye and continues.

"Don't judge me. Sam had driven me to drink with all of the doubt and hurt. Like I say, I wasn't rational. So I had Kate in my arms as I knocked on that woman's front door. I wanted her to see that Sam had a wife and children. I wanted her to feel guilty over what she was doing to my family. Problem was, I had already started on the vodka before I got there. I wasn't able to talk, I just cried. And on the way back home..." Her voice falters and I see a single tear drift down her cheek. "I lost control of the car. Put Kate and myself in hospital for a week. Sam came to his senses, realized that he had nearly lost us and broke off the relationship. The love between us had never died... the trust took a lot longer. I always believed that Kate wouldn't remember any of it. How wrong I was. At sixteen she finally confessed to me in one of those mother and daughter knock down all in wrestling bouts that teenagers like to have, that she remembered everything down to the color of the woman's hair. The memory of her words when she screamed at me for having put her through that day was almost more than I can bare and nothing that I will ever forgive myself for. She was only four years old and I had scarred her for life. Not only did she not trust men because of her father but I suspect that she doesn't trust herself to not end up as pathetic as her mother. I don't know if Sam would have come back to me if I hadn't rolled the car."

"Julie, you're not pathetic. It was Sam's fault too. You can't take all the blame."

"Oh, now darling, a mother's guilt knows no bounds and Sam and I ...well we have talked the legs off an iron pot about the past and not been to absolve ourselves of the shame and hurt that we all caused each other and our kids. Eventually Kate and I made our peace. I am happy to say Sam and I are more in love now than we were as newly weds. I would like to think that the past is the past but Kate knows that I have always had my doubts about how things might have turned out. I suspect that is why she has trouble committing to anybody long term. But darling, when I watch you, you look at her like Sam looks at me. My heart tells me that you should fight for her. Elliot, if you want her I suggest you come clean with her. Give her time to see that she can trust you and she will."

"I am not sure where to begin."

"Start with Sirens." _What the hell? _

But Julie is already standing brushing the sand off her legs. She peers up at the sky and then turns back to look toward the villa.

"Now, I can see my darling son heading this way. Why don't you and he go do some male bonding. I have shopping to do and I suspect Kate needs her beauty sleep. Her papa will be there for her when she wakes up. Y'all go and blow off some steam. And I don't want to hear any more talk about you leaving. If things get tough you can always move into one of the spare bedrooms."

I watch as she passes Ethan on her way back to the villa. They stop and exchange a morning kiss in the same way that I would with my mom. Right now I miss her more than I thought possible. Julie is a pretty damn good substitute and it is knowing that Kate has her in her life that finally convinces me I might have a chance.

Before Ethan gets to me I quickly check my phone. There are two short texts.

_CTG will be in transit to Atlanta by 1200hrs._

The other.  
_Arriving Bridgetown pm today. Meet us at Zanzibar._


	30. Chapter 30

_******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**_

* * *

_**I know you're scared that I'll soon be over it, **_

_** thats part of it all, **_

_**part of the beauty of falling in love with you, **_

_**is the fear you wont fall **_

_**it hasnt felt like this before it hasnt felt like home...before you**_

_**-The Fear You Won't Fall - Joshua Radin**_

* * *

Looking around the room I feel relief at seeing Elliot's clothes strewn around. My moment of anxiety that he has been as good as his word about leaving passes and I rise quickly to see if he is still in the bathroom. No sign but I can hear the sounds of someone swimming in the pool below our balcony. I walk outside and peer over to see my dad doing laps. Back inside my room I put on my bikini and sarong, grab a towel and head downstairs. Nobody seems to be around in the villa except a housekeeper who is tidying up the breakfast buffet.

"Would you like some breakfast mam?" Her molasses accent, rich and thick momentarily stops me. Shaking my head, I pour a glass of juice from the jug on the table.

"No, thank you, this is fine." Her frown is a reprimand I ignore with a smile moving out to the pool.

"Hi Daddy." I call out as Dad surfaces in the water. "Where is everyone?"

Wiping his face, he treads water. "Your mother has gone shopping. Ethan and Elliot went down to the beach to check out the paragliding. They haven't been gone long, you could probably catch up to them."

I shake my head. "No, I am happy to hang here with you." Dropping my towel and sarong I quickly dive into the pool and start swimming to mask the relief that whatever Elliot is doing is normal tourist behavior. The water feels cool and refreshing and I am reminded of how much swimming I don't do any more. At one stage of my life I was one of those people who would be in the water by 5am and train for four hours. Then I would spend more hours in the gym performing endless tumbles and flips in between school work. Since trying to keep up with Elliot and his sexual prowess I am a little dismayed at how much my fitness and flexibility has dropped in recent years. I really should do something about that.

After a dozen laps I stop and join Dad in the loungers by the side of the pool. For a man in his late forties he is still trim and fit with European playboy looks. He reclines on the lounger with his Ray Bans on soaking up the sun.

"You need some sunshine Katie. You look far too pale." He peers over his glasses at me.

Once more I am reminded that my father is the only other person besides Elliot who calls me Katie.

"All that study and working at the newspaper will do that." I smile back at him, rubbing some suntan lotion on my skin. "Daddy, thanks for not making a fuss about Elliot coming along. It really means a lot to us both."

"I don't think I had much choice. Just make sure that he is worthy of you Katie."

_Worthy, I am not going to marry the guy?_ "I am pretty confident that he is."

"Look, Katie, I like him don't get me wrong. But we have discussed this, he comes with a lot of baggage and a history. I just hope that you don't get hurt." The serious tone of his voice is grating on my last nerve. I know this better than anyone and I am trying to protect myself. Why doesn't everybody get this?

"You really don't trust him, do you? Has our friendly stalker sent you any more information? Something that might constitute solid evidence. Because if you don't have any then I think we should be giving Elliot the benefit of the doubt, don't you?" I hope he is still speculating. I also wonder why I am so quick to defend Elliot when I keep pushing him away. My emotions are bubbling at the surface, threatening to break free.

"You know there are some skeletons in his closet. If you want to know more you really should ask him."

"If you're talking about Gia Matteo, I already know about her." Not much but it is something.

"Mmm...Gia Matteo might be a gold digger but she is hardly a secret or a scandal."

A cold shudder passes through my body. I still don't really know if Elliot shares any of Christian's inclinations. The link with Sirens and that bitch Elena still isn't clear in my mind.

"You know Katie, I don't think that Elliot has as much to hide as his brother. Your mother is pretty convinced that his feelings for you are genuine. You need to decide what it is you want to know and what you are prepared to live with. Otherwise you might have to do the decent thing and let Elliot go." _Are you reading my mind now?_ I glance over at him but he refuses to meet my eyes.

A tear comes unbidden and I quickly brush it away. "Daddy, I...I want to do the smart thing. I don't want to be a doormat while he continues playing the field."

"Sweetheart, anyone can see that boy loves you. And you are already too smart to be anyone's doormat. He knows that."

"Yeah, well even the best women in the world can become doormats." I cannot keep the bitterness from my voice. Dad pushes up his sunglasses, sits up and grabs my hand, all but forcing me to look at him.

"I hope that you are not talking about your mother."

"Daddy, I'm sorry... it's just..." How do I say this without reopening old wounds?

"Katie, your mother is the most beautiful and gracious woman in the world. She didn't have to take me back, she didn't have to forgive me but she did and I will always be grateful to her for that. I adore her, even in those dark days I loved her. You have her in you, her class, her spirit, her beauty and intelligence. More importantly you and Elliot are of a different time, you are different people. History doesn't always repeat itself."

"Daddy, what if it does? What if I give him my heart and he breaks it?" Tears of desperation and frustration well in my eyes but I refuse to cry any more.

"Haven't you already given it to him?" His hand strokes my hair and I lean into his shoulder seeking comfort and assurance. He is right, I already love Elliot with all of my heart and no matter what happens I will get hurt. It doesn't matter any more.

"Resistance is futile." I mutter into his shoulder with a sad giggle.

"Pretty much, baby girl. Talk to him. He has stuff he needs to tell someone. It might as well be you. Then you can decide what your future holds. Together."

Just then I hear voices walking up the path towards the house and within moments Elliot and Ethan emerge from the bush path that leads to the beach.

"Hey, Dad, Kate. Bout time you got up." Ethan grins and strips off his t-shirt before diving into the pool and splashing us.

"Ethan, shit!" I shriek as the water hits me. Elliot laughs and moves to sit on the end of my lounge chair. He leans over to give me a quick peck all traces of last night's mood gone.

"Hi gorgeous. Have a good sleep?" He brushes my face with the back of his hand and stares into my eyes.

"Great, thank you. Where were you? I missed you." My arms thread around his thick neck.

"We went down to check out the beach. It's beautiful if a little crowded. Perhaps we can head back down there after lunch."

"Mmm, I'd like that." I look over at my father who is trying desperately ignore us. I can't decide if that bland expression is really a smile or a frown.

After our swim we go up to our room to shower but decide instead to take an outdoor bath. Lying against his muscular chest is reassuring, his arms firmly around me as he tells me about the para-gliders. We are very studiously making small talk, avoiding the big issues for now and enjoying the peace of being alone together. After a while we move back into the air conditioned bedroom and lay on the bed, resting from the midday heat.

"Have you heard from Ana?" Shit, with everything that has been happening here I haven't thought much about Ana except to wish that she was here to talk to.

"No, I got a text yesterday to say that she had arrived in Georgia safely but since then nothing. Why?" His fingers are laced with mine as we resume our pose from past night, facing each other on the bed. Too hot to cuddle.

"Jason sent me a text this morning. Christian is on his way to Georgia. I gather he will be there later today. I just wondered if you knew what was going on."

"Wow, do you think I should call her?"

"If I know Christian, then Ana doesn't know he is coming. I am not sure we should ruin the surprise."

"He takes stalker to a whole new level, doesn't he?" A thunderous look passes over Elliot's face and he is up off the bed and pacing.

"Jesus, Kate, did even occur to you for one tiny minute that the guy might be in love with her? Does that not even register on your list of possibilities for men? Are we all going to get tainted with your image of your father?"

"How dare you? What the hell do you know about my father?"

He storms into the bathroom and slams the door. Fuck, are we ever going to get through more than half a conversation without tearing each others eyes out. And how the hell does he know about my dad.

I lie back on the bed and slam my arms down repeatedly throwing myself bodily into the mattress with frustration. I get up and walk to the bathroom door.

"Elliot Grey get your ass out here now and stop being so goddam childish." I bang my fist on the door to get his attention. "This is no way to conduct an argument. If you want to throw this family history crap at me then you better man up and get out here face to face or I swear I will break this door down."

The door swings open as I go to pound my fist on it again and he grabs my hand pulling me into his body. His lips crash over mine and his tongue is like a tidal wave sweeping through my mouth. Our hands are everywhere and I jump to wrap my legs around his waist which takes him off balance and we fall through the door onto the bathroom floor. He has landed with a real thump on his back and he groans.

"Shit, Elliot, baby, I'm sorry." I scramble off him and try to check his limbs, his back, his head. I feel his body convulsing with laughter under my touch and he emits another groan.

"Ow, Katie, stop, I'm okay. Just winded. Just..." He stills my movement with his strong arms and I peer into his pained face. "Shit, you really pack a punch Miss K. Fuck. Remind me not to get on the bad side of you when you're really angry."

"What do you mean? I was really angry." I pull back and tuck my knees up to my chest in a sulk.

"I know, I know. And I deserve it. Your Mom told me about your Dad this morning. We were down at the beach and she was...helping me with something."

"Oh." I think about this for a while. "I am sorry for calling Christian a stalker."

"No, you're right, he has no idea about relationships so he probably comes across like a stalker. He has never acted like this about anyone. That's how I know he is in love."

"Is that how you know you are in love?" Did I really ask that?

"Yeah. That's how I know." His voice is sad. I offer him a hand and help to pull him up to a sitting position. He leans against the opposite wall to me. We look at each other as he tries to work through getting his body to function properly again. I feel guilty about hurting him. And talking about his brother that way. Mostly I feel guilty for holding out on him.

"I have never fought like this with anyone before." My voice is no more than a whisper, my eyes on the ground. I wait for this to register. After a long gap of silence he finally speaks.

"No one?"

I shake my head. "No one." Our eyes lock and I can see that he gets this but I have put him through so much. I guess he has to ask.

"Does this mean...?" Fear, longing, love are all there in his eyes. I want to close mine and shut him out for a moment while I gather my courage but I don't. Instead I hold that gaze as a way to say that every single word is true.

"Yes."

"You love me?"

"Yes, I love you." Shock turns into the biggest, sexiest, most genuine Elliot Grey grin.

"She loves me." He shakes his head and runs his fingers through his tousled wet hair.

I move forward on my knees and straddle his lap. Taking his arms and placing them around my waist, I run my hands through his hair and hold his face.

"Elliot. I. Love. You." My softest most sincere kisses land on his eyes, his nose, his mouth between each word just so that I know he understands me.

His eyes shine with love and happiness but then a cheeky look washes over him.

"So how do I know I can trust you. I mean last night you said..."

"Elliot!" I lean back and punch him in the ribs playfully but he is still sore and he doubles over in pain again. "Baby I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I love you, I promise, I love you." I am feathering kisses all over his face and his chest and it takes a only a moment for playful to become passionate.

"Katie, I need to seal this. I need to be inside you so bad."

Quickly I am on my feet and dragging him up. I race through to the bed stripping off as I go and he is right behind me. Our lovemaking is slow and tender and throughout we continue to look each other and declare our love and we know that right now we have never been more honest with another person in our lives.


	31. Chapter 31

**This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

_**I just wanna see you at night  
**_

_**Don't come round my house in the day  
**_

_**I love it when we start up a fight  
**_

_**And I love it when the fight ends your way  
**_

_**I love it when you call me names  
**_

_**-Call Me Names - Joan Armatrading-**_

* * *

Kate's parents are conspicuously absent when we finally leave our room. As is Ethan. Since it is almost 6pm we forgo the trip to the beach in favor of an early romantic dinner. On our return the others are finishing their own meal and we join them in the al fresco for a drink. I love how the Kavanaghs engage with each other. They have intelligent and feisty debates, full of humor that remind me of my own family and I am reminded that I need to call in. Just as I have that thought my phone rings. Excusing myself I move out to the poolside to take my call.

"Hey."

"Elliot, how is the holiday going, darling?" My mother's voice has that instant effect of calming me and making me feel loved. I miss her. Christian always used to rev me up by calling me a mama's boy but I can tell she has the same effect on him. That's why it breaks her heart that he has never hugged her and its why I keep her even closer to try to make up for what he isn't able to give.

"Hey, beautiful. I'm great, having fun in the sun, missing my favorite girl." I can't keep the wistful smile out of my voice now that Kate has admitted she loves me.

"That's wonderful, sweetheart. How is Kate?"

"Great."

"Just great?"

"I can't really talk right now. There is so much I want to tell you but..."

"That's okay sweetheart. I am glad things are going well. Are you getting along with her family? How do you like Julie?"

"Oh, I love her, she's amazing t but you know she will never hold a candle to you. You will always be my best girl."

"That is very sweet. I know your father wanted to talk to you but he isn't here right now. He had to fly out to Chicago but he will be back tomorrow."

"That's okay I would much rather talk to you anyway. How is our baby, girl?"

"Oh, settling in, taking over the kitchen, making her mark. You know how she is."

"Growing up too fast, huh?"

Mom laughs, "Don't let her hear you say things like that. She'll have your hide."

"Oh, yeah, well remember she's not too big to be sent to her room."

"Darling, stop."

"Hey, I better go before I get myself in any more trouble. Give her my love."

"Okay sweetheart, call me in a couple of days, please. You know how I worry."

"I know and I will. I love you."

"Love you too Elliot. Goodnight."

"Laters."

I turn around to see Kate standing on the other side of the pool with a thunderous look on her face. She storms over to me and without saying a word she continues down the beach path looking like she wants to murder someone. For a moment all I can do is watch the space where she has disappeared. My first thought is what the hell has happened? Second is that a woman alone on the tourist beach at night might not be terribly safe. I take off at a run, down the path after her, finally catching her as we emerge onto the beach.

"Babe, wait up. Where are you going?"

"As far away from you as I can possibly get." The venom in her voice strikes at me in the darkness. What the hell have I done now? I reach for her arm and she shakes me off.

"Just keep your fucking hands off me."

"Babe, just tell me. What did I do?" Rather than try to touch her again, which is getting me nowhere, I move around to block her path. She side steps me with an angry groan. I stop in my tracks and watch her building up a head of steam as she stomps through the sand. Then she turns around and stomps back to me smacking her hands on my chest repeatedly.

"You two timing, philandering, lying, two-faced, cheating, disloyal, deceptive... unfaithful... betraying...argh! You lied to me. You waited for me to fall for you so you could rip my heart out, just like I knew you would." She is too angry to even cry._ Fuck. What does she think I have done?_ I have been with her almost every moment since I met her and if I wasn't with her I was thinking of her. How can she think anything different?

"Kate, this is irrational. What..."

"Don't you call me fucking irrational, you prick. I heard you. I heard you talking to her on the phone."

I am so confused. "Who? When? What the hell are you talking about?"

"Jesus, Elliot. Why can't you just be honest for once in your life? I knew this would happen. I knew that as soon as I let you in, as soon as I let my guard down, you would decide that I wasn't enough. I just hoped that you might at least hold out until we got back to Seattle before you got bored with me."

Her hands come up to hit me again and I step in to wrap my arms around her, lifting her off her feet. Kicking and struggling she very nearly gets me in the balls which really pisses me off. I carry her over to one of the abandoned wooden loungers and sit down with her across my lap.

"Let me go, you arrogant son of a bitch."

_That does it._ My hand draws back and I smack her across the behind. She lets out a little squeal and kicks out again so I let her have it again.

"Stop, kicking." I rub her backside and keep my voice low and calm in an effort to calm her down. And to stop any passers by from getting curious at the shrewing spitfire I am manhandling.

"No!" She kicks out again. Smack!

"Are you going to stop."

"No!" Smack!

"Wrong answer, Kate." Smack!

"I hate you." Smack! Smack!

"I can see that, but you also love me so I want you to stop this and tell me what I have done."

Once again I rub gently and I can feel her respond to me, pushing her cute little ass against my hand. This is turning her on but she hasn't lost her fire yet.

"You know what you have done, asshole!" Smack!

"Don't!" Smack! "Call!" Smack! "Me!" Smack! "Names!" Smack!

"Asshole!" Smack! "Ow, stop Elliot, it hurts."

My hand returns to rubbing and this time I work my way to the apex of her thighs, feeling her dampness through her shorts. She moans and wriggles against my erection. I deliberately rub her through her shorts reminding her how much she wants me. And how much I want her.

"Please!" There is a sensual desperation to her plea. One hand continues to rub her sweet spot as I hold her hair with the other to check if she is crying. I don't want to hurt her but this treatment seems to be working wonders on her foul mood. Once more I wonder if Christian isn't on to something with all of this.

"Please, what, baby. Tell me." I whisper into her ear before I suck on her earlobe. She moans and writhes in my arms and my erection strains against her sweet pussy.

"Please don't fuck me to distract me. You can't screw your way out of this."

Instant libido crusher. I fuck her to distract her? The fire has gone out of her body and she sounds so sad and resigned. Well, maybe now maybe we can get to the bottom of this. I turn her over and bring her body up to cuddle against me. She complies but it feels far from willing.

"Baby, please tell me, what did I do?" I am determined to make this about her concerns and not about sex but it is taking a while for the message to get to my cock. I try to keep her very still so that she doesn't get any further rise out of me and we can concentrate on her doubts.

"I heard you on the phone. Anyone with ears could tell you were talking to another woman. I heard what you said."

Talk about a great reason not to eavesdrop. She is worried about my mother? I am curious how she arrived at this point after overhearing a conversation with my mother. "What did I say?"

The tears start and she sniffs through her accusation. "You...you told her that you love her? You said she was your best girl? And then there was all that talk about your baby? Do you have a child, Elliot? With another woman?"

I try desperately not to laugh but a chuckle starts deep in my chest and she feels it. Her small hands try to push away from me but I hold her steady.

"Kate, that was my mother, who yes...I love...and she is my best girl, or has been up until now. Of course, when I tell her the news that she has been usurped I have a feeling that she will be dancing with joy rather than trying to kick me in the nuts. As for baby, well, I guess my 21 year old sister is technically no longer a baby and she would prefer if I stopped calling her that but she will always be baby to me."

"Your mother? Oh God, I am so stupid. I'm sorry." Kate's voice is a small squeaky whisper into my chest. I can almost feel the heat of her embarrassment so I guess her face might be the same color as her ass right now.

"Am I forgiven now?"

"Yes!" A quieter, squeakier whisper that grabs me by the heart and the balls at the same time.

"Will you please try not to be so insecure? I promise you that from the moment I met you there hasn't been and never will be anyone else. You mean everything to me, baby. I love you."

Sniffle. "I...I know. I love you too. Its just..."

"Sweetheart, I know that this is new. Hell, this morning you were still holding on to this insane idea that we were not going to last past this holiday. I get that. And I don't expect you to be able to just let go of that fear straight away. But you have to talk to me. Please. I promise I won't keep anything from you." I kiss her hair and gently stroke her back as I hold her. There is a pause in her breathing.

"Does that mean that you will tell me about Sirens?"

My hands go still. _Big fucking open door there, Grey, you idiot._ She pulls away slightly to look at me. She absolutely has me over a barrel here and she knows it. _Clever girl, Katie._

"Honey, I will tell you about Sirens. But first I need to talk to your Dad."

"About the stalker?"

"Yeah, and I really need to do that privately. Not because I want to keep secrets from you but because I suspect that he knows things about other members of my family that they might want to keep private."

"Like Christian?"

"Yeah, but I think there is something about my dad as well. I don't know but it wouldn't be fair to him if I didn't check in with him first. Do you trust me?"

There is a small pause. I know that she is disappointed.

"Yeah, I understand. And I do trust you?" My lips join hers briefly.

"Thanks, babe. Now tell me. Did that little spanking turn you on, Miss K?" Her little gasp says it all.

"Yes." Back to that fucking sweet, sexy little squeak.

"Mmm...I thought so. Very hot, Miss K. Can I suggest we continue this conversation up in our room later? Right now I want to talk with your Dad."

"It could wait until tomorrow."

"It could, but the sooner I find out what he knows, the sooner I can be completely honest with you. And I want that more than anything."

She nods then stands up allowing me to stand. We walk back through the path to the villa towards the conversation I am not sure I want to have.


	32. Chapter 32

******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**Thanks for the reviews. I am worried that this chapter hasn't lived up to the hype but posting it anyway to get your feedback. Also on the lookout for the ultimate playlist for all previous chapters. Thanks to those of you who have made suggestions already.  
**

_**In the dark, In the darkness you will find **_

_**Dirty little secrets we all hide **_

_**'Cause we all have a darker side **_

_**A place we keep where no one else will find**_

_**'Cause everybody wants to hide their secrets away **_

_**Nobody wants to stand up to the pain**_

_**But I will stand up to the pain **_

_**Wake up and fight again **_

_**If you could dance with me through this rain **_

_**And we will fight, we'll fight again, fight again**_

_**-Secrets - Good Charlotte  
**_

* * *

Being a man who can never take a break from work, Sam has set up his office away from home in a small study of the main living area. There is no surprise when I request this conversation. Julie and Kate excuse themselves and head upstairs for an early night. Ethan is meeting some new paragliding buddies at a local bar. Sam and I settle into easy chairs with a glass of scotch each.

"I am almost hesitant to ask what you know."

"I am almost hesitant to show you." A wry grin flickers over his face as he hands me an iPad. "These started arriving in my email about three months ago."

Glancing at the older man's outstretched hand with the offending technology, I would like to say that I am looking forward to getting to the bottom of this so called mystery but the thought of what I might be about to see has my stomach churning. Holding the screen I study a grainy picture of a car park I recognize.

"Sirens." My eyes shift to Sam's and he nods grimly.

"Recognize the car?" I peer at the screen again and notice five cars parked in front of the building. One of them is Christian's Audi R8.

"My brother's car." While this is an interesting photograph it is hardly damning evidence of anything. Sirens is an adult club that has some unique spatial elements including three public entertainment venues. Odyssey is the main bar and night club that separates Eros, a male strip club on one side of the building and Aphrodite's the burlesque club on the other side. Open for the last fifteen years it is a favorite venue for hen and buck's nights. However, the nightclub itself doesn't have any adult shows. It is strictly for dancing and is an extremely popular public night spot.

I flick to the next picture. This one is more of a shock and I recognize it instantly. It is a page from the guest book of the Sirens' best kept secret. An invitation only subterranean club called Orpheus that caters to a fairly unique clientele. While many of the signatures have been pixelated in the photo, there are two that are clear and easy for me to recognize. Elena Lincoln and Christian Grey. _Shit._

Moving on, the next photograph is of Elena in what appears like a leather dominatrix outfit whipping a naked male ass. The next is Elena and Christian leaving the Esclava salon in downtown Seattle, arm in arm. Then a copy of my staff id badge from Sirens. The next is a hospital record, I look up at Sam questioning.

"Elena's?" I ask. Sam nods.

"What you are looking at now is a file is a copy of a police report on an assault on Linc Lincoln." I swallow, trying not to show what that means to me.

There are several more photos of Christian, Elena or I outside Sirens at various times. Then a photo that is another surprise for me. My father, escorting a very injured and heavily bandaged Elena from the hospital, his arm firmly around her waist as he assists her into his car. Finally there are a series of photos outside the Heathman. Kate and I looking into each others eyes, Christian escorting a slightly disheveled and very drunk Ana from his car into the hotel foyer.

"Damn. Were there any messages with these?"

"Most of the time none. As I say, I started getting a photo every week about three months ago. We tried to trace the origin but haven't had much luck. They all seem to be sent from a generic hotmail address on public computers in internet cafes. A couple of times we were encouraged to dig for further information and given leads to financial records like your purchase of Lincoln Timber shares recently."

"Shit. So all of this is pointing at Linc Lincoln." That riles me. Lincoln is an unethical prick and much as I might dislike Elena no woman deserves to be subjected to the kind of beating that bastard gave her. He is an arrogant thug who deserves everything he gets.

"You tell me."

"Elena is one of my mother's oldest friends. When she and Linc were still married they were both very much part of our lives. What he did to her is unforgivable but I am not sure how we are implicated in that other than being there for her when she got out of the hospital. That photo of my Dad is hardly damning given he pretty much handled her divorce." I am hedging my bets here, hoping like hell that he doesn't know too much about the connection between Elena and Christian.

"Elliot, I know some of what goes on at Orpheus. My sources tell me it is discrete and select so I am not convinced that the photo of Elena in leather was taken there." I already know that it wasn't. I recognized the room she was in. "I gather that Christian has a membership which implicates him in a particular lifestyle that might not be good for business." _Fuck._

"Are you going to publish this?"

"Are you going to marry my daughter?" _Jesus, straight to the point._

"When she is ready - yes, I will ask her." My eyes bore into his, just so the message clear.

"Then - No. But that is not going to stop Linc, if it is him, from sending this to the competition."

"How do we know he hasn't done that already?"

"I am fairly certain that he hasn't. For a start he doesn't know how tight knit the media community can be. A few carefully placed phone calls on my part will shut this down quickly."

"Why would they bury this? It is gossip mag gold." I can't believe he would do that.

"This prick has made it personal by including Kate and you in this. He is fucking with my family for leverage and I don't roll that way. My people know this, my competitors know this." The edge in his voice reminds me of his phone call to me and I know that he means this. Damn, it feels good to have him on my side.

"Aren't you still worried about the Sirens connection?"

"Son, I have known presidents who have had some pretty fucked up sexual leanings in their time. Some fairly powerful people have strange predilections but it doesn't stop them from being basically good hardworking people in their everyday and family lives. Its the loose canons like Linc Lincoln that we have to be concerned with. If you can look me in the eye and tell me that your brother is a good man then you and I won't have any problem with this. Can you do that?"

My eyes fly to his face. "Yes, Sam, I can. Christian is a good man. He cares deeply about the world he lives in and the people who are close to him. I trust him with my life. More importantly, I trust him with Kate's life." Once more we hold each others gaze a while before he gives an almost imperceptible nod of approval.

"That's good enough for me. I don't need to know any more about Sirens. However, I think Kate does." I nod. Yes, and I am working on how to tell her that. I just hope that she understands.

"I am going to have to find a way to silence Linc. Otherwise he is going to keep trying to collect evidence against my family."

"Don't you already hold that ace up your sleeve?" Sam knows about the buy up. I don't know how he knows but he does.

"Yeah, I guess we do." I am reluctant to reveal our insurance policy.

"Is the assault the reason why you and Christian have bought up controlling shares in Lincoln Timber?" I try to school my features so that I don't reveal too much. It seems a little pointless. "That _is_ what you two have done, isn't it?" Suddenly I have a picture of what it will be like when Kate becomes a fully fledged journo. _ Scary shit._

"I don't know how you know that, Sam, but yes. The assault was one reason to do that but it wasn't the only one." How much to tell? "I was apprenticed to Linc's brother when I first left school. It was a great job and it saved me at a rough time in my life. This was long before the assault on Elena. While I worked for Max Lincoln I had a lot to do with Lincoln Timber. It didn't take me long to learn that Linc had some fairly unethical practices in his business including importing materials from countries where there is a history of over logging. No one has ever been able to prove that he does it but I refuse to buy from him because of it." Even without the assault I would have tried to convince Christian to help me go after him.

"You're playing with fire. What about the assault on Linc?" This is the one that really stops me in my tracks. This is not a story I want to get into with anyone.

"You think I did that?"

"No, but I wondered if you knew anything about it." Yeah, I know. But there is no way that I am putting that information on the table.

"No. I have nothing I can tell you about that. Except the bastard deserved it." Once more Sam is searching my face. I try to remain as impassive as possible, drawing on my inner Christian-Master-of-the-Universe look. There is no way I am revealing this to Sam. He doesn't need to know.

"You know if you needed to, you could always reveal exactly how much of his company you own. That would put a stop all of this." I know he is right but technically it is Christian who owns those shares so it should be his decision. That would mean revealing all of this to Christian and coming clean about what I know. There has to be another way.

Thanking Sam I go to leave the room. "Elliot, I want you to know that I support this relationship with you and Kate and I think you are a good person but as a father I have to ask. Are you going to put her in physical danger? Is she getting into something with you that might...diminish her self respect?"

"Sam, I appreciate your candor but what Kate and I choose to do in our relationship is personal. I love Kate and I respect her. That is very important to me. I will spend every day of the rest of my life loving her and trying to earn and keep her trust."

Sometime later I enter the bedroom and find Kate asleep. She looks like an angel and rather than wake her I go out to the balcony to think about everything that Sam has shown me. His reassurance that he would do everything he could to prevent this going to press has calmed my nerves somewhat but I still feel edgy. Checking my phone there is a message.

_Where RU? Beer's cold and Z's is rocking._

I text back: _On my way._

I sneak out leaving Kate to sleep.


	33. Chapter 33

******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

* * *

**Thanks again for the support. I love all the speculation about who Elliot was meeting at the bar. Sorry but the mystery continues a little bit longer. Please help me with a playlist. Thanks to glory2bee for suggesting Wanted by Hunter Hayes. Don't forget to check her new story 'Laters Peach'.**

_**All of the love we left behind **_

_**Watching the flash backs intertwine **_

_**Memories I will never find**_

_**So I'll love whatever you become **_

_**And forget the reckless things we've done **_

_**I think our lives have just begun I think our lives have just begun**_

_**And I'll feel my world crumbling **_

_**And I'll feel my life crumbling **_

_**And feel my soul crumbling away **_

_**And falling away, falling away with you**_

**_-Falling Away With You - Muse_  
**

* * *

Morning brings an amazing sense of peace with my man wrapped around me and the memory of having finally admitted to Elliot how I feel. I have no idea what time he came up to our room last night and I am both touched and disturbed by the idea that he chose not to wake me up to continue our 'discussion' about discipline. God, I was so hot for him last night when he spanked me and the thought of it now has me squirming. That and the raging hard on pressing into my back. Lifting the sheet I take a quick peak and then groan as I slip out of the bed to go to the bathroom.

When I return disappointment descends. Elliot hasn't woken up, which is so not like him. Perhaps he was up really late with Dad. Meanwhile I am here with all of this pent up sexual energy and nowhere to go. _What would Elliot do? Exercise!_ Instead of going down to the pool I head out to the beach to run, something I haven't done since...well I don't really remember.

The air is so fresh, the sea sparkling, reflecting how light I feel in my heart and I want to laugh as I sprint along the shoreline. I keep the pace gentle, sucking the fresh air into my lungs and wondering why I don't do this more often. _Oh yeah, cos I became jock averse when I reached college. _ Some kids are playing on the sand near the villa pathway when I return half an hour later, challenging each other to perform hand stands and cartwheels. I slow down to watch them as they laugh and tease each other. Without much thought I break into a sprint, going into a full tumble combination that I haven't performed in four years. _ Cartwheel, round off, hand spring, hand spring, aerial, backflip, backflip._ As I complete the kids offer a around of applause and I give them a laughing curtsy saluting them as I turn to run up the jungle track, straight into that hard muscular chest I love so well.

Elliot steps back from me to start a slow clap. Blushing, I give him a flirty giggling smile. _Just like every bimbo you have ever hated in your life, Kate. My how the tables have turned. _He wraps me in his arms his expression moving from admiration to concern in a heartbeat.

"Babe, are you alright? Where were you?" Sweet, he was worried about me.

"Good morning." Smiling I pull him down for a kiss. "You are looking very sexy this morning Mr Grey. What brings you to my beach this early?"

"Your beach? I see...one run and you are suddenly in the real estate game."

"Mmmm, necessary really. Now I can build sand castles with my handsome prince."

" You know I will build a kingdom for you princess, all you have to do is ask." I laugh at how completely corny he is and pull him in for another passionate kiss which he shifts into one of his trademark dips while the kids cheer and applaud. We both turn to them and bow before he takes my hand and leads me back to the villa for breakfast.

A sunglass-wearing Ethan slumps at the table, coffee in one hand and head in the other.

"Oh, bro, someone had a big night last night, huh?" Running my hand along his shoulder I vindictively scrape the chair along the ground as I thump myself down.

"Ohh...Do you have to sit so loud?" The huskiness in his voice is a dead giveaway that there was a lot of loud drunken singing in his recent past. The temptation is too much so I reach over to ruffle his hair bringing on more groans and Elliot chuckles watching our exchange.

"You shouldn't run with the crowd if you can't keep up, man." Elliot's tease earns a scowl.

"Fuck off, Elliot. You were out as late as I was, I saw you across the road at Zanzibar's." Ethan grumbles and I turn a questioning look on Elliot. What does he mean by that? Elliot just shrugs and then helps himself to a stack of pancakes.

"Not me man.." Shoving a mouthful of pancake and syrup Elliot looks across at Ethan. A frown settles on to Ethan's face although I can't really read his expression through the sunglasses.

"You must have an ugly double."

"Nah, they made me and they broke the mold." I roll my eyes. Now that I know Elliot, I know that the ego is a defense mechanism. I giggle and Elliot grins causing Ethan to frown even more.

oOo

Shopping in the local markets of Bridgetown is a real treat. We run into Mom who is picking up local crafts and cloth, her way of collecting inspiration for a future design collection. My Dad is with her carrying her purchases and holding her hand like a besotted teenager. The four of us spend the morning meandering through the streets, stopping for fresh juices and finally grabbing a light lunch before heading back to the villa for a swim.

oOo

The beach is relatively quiet when we arrive there in that afternoon. Most people have sought cooler venues to cope with the afternoon heat. The sand is pristine white and the water clear and sparkling. We locate a couple of sun loungers and settle under an expansive umbrella to sunbake.

"Are you going to tell me about your conversation with my Dad." Elliot is rubbing a cooling lotion into my back in a sensual circular motion. Not too sure if he is protecting my skin from the sun as much as feeling me up. I need to keep talking to stop thinking lewd thoughts about my boyfriend.

"I am sure you already know most of what he had to say." He looks exhausted as he puts the top on the bottle and lies back on the chair pulling his sunglasses down over his eyes. The epitome of Barbados chic lying there in his board shorts with a light shirt open revealing his bare muscled chest underneath. "I would tell you but I would have to kill you."

I laugh a little too bitterly, "Making jokes to put me off, Mr Grey" _Oh, so we are back to keeping secrets._ I try not to let the frustration show on my face.

"Yeah, something like that. Have you seen the photographs?." I shake my head and he reaches over to take my hand lifting it up to his mouth. "Well, I would just as soon keep it like that for a little while longer, if you don't mind. There are a lot of things we need to talk about, and I want to be completely honest with you about it but trust me right now, on a public beach, is not the time. The good news is that it took me about ten minutes to work out where the threat is coming from and I think we can nail this bastard. So I don't want you to worry."

His smile lights up his face and I wonder why I keep assuming the worst. He wants to tell me and he will in time. He loves me. Now I want to, no I need to trust him and he deserves my trust.

Suddenly a shout goes up from the water. A group of kids are struggling against a rip about 50 yards out from the beach,their bodies flailing in the water and the sound of desperation from the small group of watchers down by the waterline. We are both up and out of our seat,running hard down to the waters edge along with the half dozen or so people around us. From here we can see four bodies in the water, three teens and a child who looks to be about ten years old. Two on-duty lifeguards run down with flotation devices charging straight past us into the water.

Without thinking Elliot and I pick up the extra flotation devices they have dropped and follow them in until we are waist deep. From here we wait and watch ready to assist as the life guards come in.

The guards reach them quickly and we see there is a tussle as the older youths scramble to the security of the older, stronger swimmers. There is panic in their body language and we see one of the guards going under. The younger child, a boy and one of the older kids, a girl are becoming weaker and for a moment the boy disappears under the water line. Elliot is quickly on the move heading out to the tiring body. I follow in his wake but I am a stronger swimmer and overtake him quickly.

Once we reach them we see that the boy has disappeared completely. The life guards are already managing two of the older children and are heading back into the beach.

"Kate, take her in."

I grab the older girl who is still above the water line but flagging in energy. She is unconscious and I turn her on her back and begin swimming as fast as I can for the shore. Glancing back I can see Elliot diving to find the other child. He comes up empty handed and goes down again. By the time I get to the shore he has gone down four times looking for the small body. Eventually he surfaces about 20 yards from where I left him, having been carried by the rip. Relief floods through me when I see he has a small body in his arms.

The teens are weak but breathing and sitting up on the beach so one of the lifeguards heads back into the water to assist Elliot who is exhausted. The other comes to me and we begin administering CPR on the girl I have brought in who is now not breathing on her own. My body is trembling and weak but we continue our efforts finally eliciting a cough and expulsion of water as she begins breathing again unassisted. I cradle her in my arms as the lifeguard moves off to assist with the little boy that Elliot and the other guard have just carried on to the beach.

Elliot is breathing hard, looking across at me with a worried glance and shakes his head as the guards try to bring the boy back to life. As we all watch on they are starting to flag and I pass the girl over to another bystander who has brought towels and blankets down to the shoreline. Fifteen minutes pass with no result and I move in to take over the breathing. After a few more minutes Elliot takes over the compressions to give the other guard a break. In the distance we can hear an ambulance wail but neither of us stop working and I am willing this little boy to come back to life. Beside us the small group of saved children are being wrapped up by the bystanders in towels and my mind registers that there is soft sobbing. Finally, with my mouth over the young boy I feel a convulsive cough and I pull away as Elliot quickly rolls his frail body into the recovery position and we help him to expel the excess fluid.

The two sets of ambulance paramedics have arrived on the beach with stretchers and oxygen. The crowd parts to allow them through and they take over doing obs on the victims eventually getting them into stretchers on the back of the surf rescue quad bikes that have arrived from somewhere further up the beach. Everyone is driven off the beach with the newly arrived lifeguard contingent shepherding the crowds back. Elliot and I are checked out and given the all clear before being escorted back to our villa.

oOo

News has filtered back to the villa and we say very little to each other as my parents fold us both into hugs and guide us up to our room. With the door closed I finally step into his arms. We are both shaking with excess adrenalin and the cold of the sea still taking hold of our core temperatures. The tears come in a steady stream as relief kicks in and takes over from the shock. Our bodies are very still, no desperate attempt at relief through life affirming sex, just stillness and safety in our closeness. When I look up at him I notice that he is crying too and I feel so incredibly humbled to be loved by this strong sensitive man.

"Are you okay?" Such a benignly stupid question but his tears are beautiful and worrying.

"I thought I had lost him." His voice is a hoarse whisper filled with loss. My hands go to his face.

"Its okay, baby. He is okay and it is all due to you. You saved him." My teary eyes are trying desperately to make him focus on me. Come back, from wherever you are sweetheart, come back to me. But his eyes are distant and longing. Lost. Then he looks at me, registers my presence and his large body starts to crumble.

"Elliot, shit." I am taken to the floor with the weight of him and he is clinging to me sobbing uncontrollably. "Baby, please. We did it, we saved them, you saved that little boy. It is all going to be fine."

"I didn't save him, I couldn't save him." My strong beautiful man is falling apart in my arms and I don't understand. He is lost inside some other memory and I can't reach him. "I tried, I tried to get to him but I couldn't, I couldn't save him."

Elliot's arms are wrapped around my waist and his head is buried against my chest. His body is shuddering with wracking sobs and all I can do is hold him and kiss his blonde hair as he cries.

"Tell me, sweetheart, who couldn't you save." Whatever this is it has very little to do with today any more. His mind has traveled far away in time and distance and I am trying desperately to pull him back to me.

"Chris, I couldn't save my brother."

"Baby, Christian is fine." I don't understand any of this and he is starting to scare me.

Another wave of heart wrenching sobs overtakes him and I hold him firm. Finally he manages to choke out, "No, Christopher, my birth brother." Shit, you had a brother? My mind is going a million miles an hour now as I process this. I know that all the Grey children were adopted. Christian and Elliot at the same time, Elliot was 6 years old, Christian was 4. That was Detroit. Then a year later baby Mia was adopted in Seattle. I know this from my research for the interview with Christian. It is all public record but not their respective backgrounds. Something happened to Elliot's birth brother and he feels responsible but how could he have been. He was just a little boy. Oh baby, what haunts you?

We stay like this until his crying stops and for once in my life I am silent. Taking it all in, wanting him to talk but willing his soul back together before he does. There will be time enough to talk but not now. Just hold him, just love him. Just be. Finally I feel the shuddering sobs become a tremor against the cold and I know I can now safely get him to move. I need to get him warm again.

Standing up I go to the bathroom to run the tub but it is already full. Either the housekeeper or my mother must have prepared this for us and I am grateful. The tub is a large outdoor bowl with spa jets that I turn on to get the water warming up again. I go back into the room and pull Elliot to his feet. Thankfully he is able to assist me and he comes along willingly. In the bathroom I strip him gently and lead him over to the tub. I can't help but admire his firm strong body as he steps into the water and sinks down. I quickly strip and step in then pull him towards me so that he is sitting between my legs. I hold him firmly willing him warm with the water and my body and eventually his tremors stop. He relaxes back against me allowing me to wash him in gentle strokes.

Soon his face tilts up towards mine and I lean in to kiss him. A chaste kiss that is hesitant to shatter his calm but then it builds as it always does until our tongues are thrashing wildly for supremacy. He turns our bodies in a swift movement so that now I am straddling his body and his erection is pressed firmly against me. Strong arms envelope me and his hands massage my skin and muscles which are aching from cold and exertion. He feels so good and my hands begin to reciprocate, kneading his firm arms and shoulders bringing his strength back.

Lifting me he slips a hand between my legs and finds my cleft massaging it firmly as he slides his fingers inside me. We both groan with the sheer pleasure of it and I can feel him getting harder. His mouth trails down my torso to find my breasts and he sucks hard on my nipples until I give a little scream with the pleasure and pain of his bite. I rise and impale myself on his penis thrusting down hard and sharp. I capture his mouth with mine again and thrust my tongue with equal force tasting the residual salt from the sea. We begin to move and it is strong and firm, pleasure building fast as I clench my pelvic muscles firmly around his long hard shaft. The water is sloshing over the sides of the bath but we are in a frenzy not noticing the noise of our lovemaking as it echoes out across the valley.  
With a scream I release around him, his fingers massaging my clit as he thrusts into me again gaining his own release. We grasp each other breathing hard both with tears of joy and sadness mingled on our cheeks. It has all been too much this last few hours of combat and fury, as we desperately try to hold ourselves together. Looking into his eyes I see his pain, his loss, but I also see the sheer joy of living and the intensity of his love writ large. This man loves me. I am his heart and soul and I know beyond all doubt that he is mine.

He holds me in this position, firmly inside me as we lounge in the water. I move and he is instantly hard inside me again. Our lovemaking is slower and quieter this time, our kisses more circumspect and gentle. This love is with reverence and awe and we come together in the same way.

Our recovery this time is quicker our bodies pull apart and he turns me so that I am leaning back against his strong form. He is back, my beautiful strong man, and he has control and comfort in our love once more. I relax my breathing against his chest as he lathers soap across my body. Taking my long tresses in his hand he begins to wash my hair with the sweet scented shampoo. He rinses carefully and then conditions it leaving it in while I turn and wash his hair. His locks are long and straight around his face, the eternal beach boy look. His blue eyes blaze with intensity as he looks into mine. So much love.

Eventually we rinse and rise from the warm water, drying each other then wrapping ourselves in robes. We emerge into our room to find that a meal has been set on the balcony. I must remember to thank my mother for this. Somehow she knows what we both need in the aftermath of this crisis and a quiet private dinner is exactly right. There is a cool crisp white wine, some baked whole fish with vegetables smothered in a coconut cream sauce. Some freshly baked bread. So simple and delicious. We eat quietly, holding hands.

"Christopher was two years younger than me." Elliot begins without any prompting from me and I pause my fork a fraction. His eyes are gazing out to sea and he starts to talk. "We lived in Ann Arbor, my mom was a cultural anthropologist, a professor from Melbourne, Australia. She had moved us to the US when I was three years old, after our Dad died in a mining accident in Western Australia. We had no other family, nothing that tied her to home so she went where she could get work. University of Michigan, Ann Arbor. That day we were staying at a cabin at Ford Lake. It was out of season but warm enough during the day for us to swim. Christopher and I got on most of the time since it was just the three of us but like all brothers we liked to challenge each other. So I was daring him to jump off the dock. He was scared but he didn't want to admit it. It took a while and a lot of shit from me but eventually he did it. Took a big run up and then tried to pull up too late. Instead of going in feet first he flipped in head first. He must have knocked himself out cause he just sunk like a stone. I thought he was kidding around at first but then he didn't come up. I started diving down to try and find him but it was so dark in the water and I couldn't find him. Then my mom came running over from the beach, she had been cooking on the barbeque but watching us like she always did. Only now she was panicking and yelling at me. I went down again and I found him but his foot was caught and I couldn't get him loose. I came up to the surface for breath and then tried again. I could see his face under the water and it was so calm, you know. Just still and staring at me. I see that face in my dreams. And I just couldn't get his foot free."

Tears are coursing down my cheeks as he talks. It is eerie how calm he is now.

"Next thing I know my mom was in the water pushing me away. She shouted at me to get out, to go back to the cabin and get a blanket. So I did as she asked. I was so scared and I ran as hard as I could to get there and then back out to the dock. It must have taken me fifteen minutes, no more than that. When I came back out there were people at the end of the dock but I pushed my way through with the blanket like my mom had asked me to do. Only when I got there she was face down in the water, with Chris' hand in hers. They were just floating there all peaceful and I yelled at them to get out of the water but they weren't listening to me. Some men hauled their bodies out of the water but they couldn't save them. My brother had drowned, my mother had a heart attack trying to save him. And I killed them both."

Quickly he pulls his hand out of mine as if it hurts to touch me. No, Elliot, you didn't kill them. It was a tragic accident, nothing more. But I can see the pain and I know that there is nothing I can say to take away that guilt.

"I was five years old, I had killed my brother and my mother. I had no family back in Australia, certainly nobody who wanted me. I spent a year in the system in Detroit. Grace had done some itinerant lecturing at the university and she was my mom's best friend so she took me in as a foster child. It took a year of fighting but eventually she and Carrick had been allowed to legally adopt me. They saved me."

My heart is breaking for the small boy who lost his family. For the man who is pulling away from my touch. I can tell that I am going to have to fight for him now. Something in this admission has taken him from me and taken a little of himself too.

"Elliot, I am so sorry."

"Don't. Don't be sorry for me, don't be sorry for my loss. It has been too many years of sorry." I can feel the bitterness in his words.

"No. I am sorry that today has brought it all back to you. I am sorry that the memories are still so very raw. But I will not be sorry that you are here. That you were here for that little boy today. You saved him and I can't be sorry for that."

Turning he looks at me and I can see a glimmer of something like hope. Then the shutters go down. He walks past me and starts to get dressed. It is after 9pm and his actions startle me but then I guess he just needs to get out and blow off some steam. I start to dress as well. He says nothing for a moment as he finishes dressing then he walks over to the door.

"I think you better stay here." He says quietly.

"What? No, I will come with you, I am happy to." I say as I throw a tank top over my head.

"No, Kate. I don't want you to. Stay here. Go to sleep." His voice is too calm and controlled.

"I'm not going to sleep without you. Wait a moment while I throw a face on." I walk into the bathroom to put on some makeup but when I come out he is gone. Picking up my wallet and a pair of heels I race downstairs to catch him but he is not there.


	34. Chapter 34

_******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**_

* * *

_**Gotta get my mind clear got nothing got nothing to lose**_

_**Gotta get my pain straight chase away them blues**_

_**Still got my thinking but its getting loud**_

_**And all these voices keep spinning round**_

_**I'm trying not to break down**_

_**-Breakdown - Alice Russell-**_

* * *

Ethan is reading out on in the alfresco, Mom and Dad must be in bed. He glances up at me as I race outside.

"Hey whats up? Did you two fight." Concern is evident on his face as he puts his kindle down and gazes at me.

"Not exactly. Which way did he go?" Struggling to get my heels on I reach down and take a swig from his glass. _Ugh, what is it with men and fucking scotch_. Hardly a refreshing tropics drink. With a shrug of his shoulders, Ethan smoothly rises out of his seat.

"What happened? He stalked out of here like you guys had a big bust up and he needed to chill. I didn't exactly see where he went but he looked very much like he needed to be alone. Perhaps you should let him"

"No, I am not sure that I should. This is about today. He isn't coping with the aftermath of it very well. I can't tell you everything right now but I'm worried about him. I don't know if alone is a good thing. Will you help me find him?" He looks at me a moment then turns around to down his drink.

"Come on let's go." There's a pathway to the side of the house leading out to the main road. I trust that Ethan has a vague idea of where Elliot might go. The villa is only a block away from the nearest tourist strip and it is a matter of moments before we pass an assortment of bars and restaurants. An hour later we have trawled through every bar on the strip and have started on the clubs another block over which are only just coming alive.

The first two clubs are relatively quiet and it is easy to see that Elliot isn't there. The third one is heaving with bodies, loud music and the oppressive heat. We move through as quickly as we can but it is slow work checking in all the booths and corners. The cover charge is free on the expectation that we will buy drinks in each venue so we are alternating between the local beer and sparkling water but after the day I have had and the wine at dinner the alcohol is hitting me pretty hard.

Almost staggering into the fourth bar, we are hit by music pulsing through the room drawing our attention to the bar in the middle with bar staff demonstrating synchronized flipping of bottles behind backs and over heads. It takes only a moment to register that one of them is Elliot and it's like watching some sort of 'Tom Cruise in Cocktail' routine as he coordinates his movements with one of the other barmen while a hoard of foreign tourists, mostly women, hang on their every move. Shock floods through my body at the huge sexy smile on his face, so far from the distant and drawn look he had as he left the villa. _What the fuck is he doing here?_ Well, I know what he is doing as he shakes the cocktail cup over a glass then swivels the whole container 720 degrees before pouring the red liquid into an iced martini glass with a final flourish. _OK so he has some skills but it still doesn't explain why the hell he is here._

Elliot slides the glass across the bar to a tall leggy redhead who takes hold of the stem and beams up at him before she take a sip and licks her lips seductively. He leans across to take the tip she is offering. Just as he goes to grab it she rises up off her seat in her 5 inch heels and reaches out to grab his shirt collar. The fifty dollar bill is quickly snatched back from him and she tucks it into her substantial cleavage which she then thrusts up and offers to him amidst a cacophony of cat calls and whistles. Next thing I know he has the note between his teeth, and he throws his arms up in the air to the raucous cheer of the crowd. _Fuck! You get upset so you go to a bar and get down and dirty serving over-priced drinks to horny female tourists? Not on my fucking watch asshole._ My mouth drops open as she leans further into him and plants a brief but passionate tongue-thrusting kiss on his mouth. He pushes her away with a laugh, his hands raised to ward her off but I have seen enough.

_Forget saving him from himself, I am fucking pissed now. _Pushing Ethan out of my way I stalk towards the other end of the bar and order a tequila layback. As I wait for the hunky barman to position himself I pull up my tank top and tie it in a knot just under my breasts. The heat and the alcohol and the fact that I am royally pissed at Elliot has got to me and I pick up a glass of water from the bar and pour it over my face and breasts allowing it to cool my skin. This attracts the attention of a group of guys who look like a frat boy reunion not far from where Elliot is standing. The gorgeous barman holds a bottle of tequila and a bottle of lime over my head and I give him a wink before turning around and laying back with my head and shoulders on the bar. A roar goes up as he hovers above my head then pours straight it into my mouth. Two guys have moved in close to my side and they take my outstretched arms to pull me upright as I swallow. Placing my hands on their cheeks, I stroke their faces before walking out on to the dance floor, making sure that I am attracting enough attention for Elliot and every other single hot blooded guy in the club to notice me. Sure enough the frat boys are heading my way, looking at me like I am the sweetest damn dessert on the buffet. I know this scenario well, having played this game a thousand times. So well, in fact, that I start a mental countdown in my head as I anticipate their next move. Glancing around I see Ethan staying close. He has my back. But right now it is not him that I am hoping to draw into a fight.

A vocal chant starts up, followed by an electronic rhythm and bass track. The music is vibrating around me, through me, as I saunter on to the dance floor like a sexed-up supermodel; all hips, tits and ass swaying. Once I hit the center of the floor I raise my hands to my head and go through the process of unleashing my hair, shaking the golden waves out before raising my arms in the air _(so get your hands up in the air)_ and starting a series of figure eights with my hips _(I'll make you hot, hot, hot)_. Although I am dancing on my own I can feel every eye on my body and every man visualizing their hands on my waist as I grind. It doesn't take long for the vultures to start circling and a couple of hot looking locals make a move towards me before my frat boys push them away and surround me. For the most part they seem a little reserved but there is always one who thinks he has what it takes. This one is about 6 foot 3, dark hair and a tan. He's all Calvin Klein underwear model, buff with his sculpted chest exposed through the opening of his white linen shirt. Across the room I can see Elliot watching on with a hard impassive look. _Yeah well you're not the only one who is pissed, Grey._ I turn my back on him and keep dancing while Calvin moves in behind me and pushes his body up close. Too close.

Anticipating his touch, I feel Calvin's hands go to my waist and I start mentally counting again to see how long it will take before Elliot makes his move. My eyes are closed and I keep my body moving suggestively. For the longest time nothing is happening except the wriggling of my but against the ridge in Calvin's 504s and I am worried now that my plan is about to backfire. Calvin is cute but he is no Elliot.

_Just get those hands back, (ah)_ Calvin pulls my arms back behind me and places my hands on his thighs sliding them upwards. _Oh God, he is going to make me rub his crotch._ _No, you dont grab that, (oh)._ He pushes my hands up to his hips then grinds himself hard into me. _Holy shit!_ _Go on and lean back, (hey)._ An arm snakes around my ribs and he forces me to lean my upperbody against his chest. _Gimmie mo cash!_

Keeping my eyes closed I sense that one of the other frat boys has moved in front of me, sandwiching me back against Calvin and suddenly this doesn't seem such a good idea. _Hurry up, Elliot, how long are you going stand there gawking and doing nothing? T_The frat brothers are really going for it now, the new guy pushing his thigh deliberately between my legs as he holds my hips and Calvin thrusting at me from behind, his hands on my ribs. Then the swap hand positions and new guy has his hands on the sides of my breasts. My eyes fly open and Elliot's glacial blues are blazing back at me. My hero is there, grinding into me and holding me in a man sandwich with Calvin K. I don't want to enjoy this but it is kind of hot. The over-stimulated crowd is cheering us on, encouraging us to keep dancing. My two hunks are really moving on me, bumping, grinding and suddenly I am really nervous that Elliot might be willing to share me. Calvin's hands are still firmly gripping my hips and he nuzzles into my neck forcing me to drop my head back on his shoulder. Elliot is pushing his pelvis into me, hitting my sex firmly with his erection with his hands grazing my aching breasts. He leans in and covers my mouth, sweeping his tongue through my mouth while Calvin continues to nuzzle at my neck, blowing gently in my ear. The other guys are clapping and cheering them on. Thankfully Elliot gives Calvin a look that makes him back off.

"Did you like that baby?" Elliot is still wrapped around me, his lips have moved to my ear. "Does the idea of two guys turn you on?"

_Jesus, how do I answer that? Yes, I mean no, fuck. What does he want me to say?_ "Yes, that was hot and no, I don't want to share you or be shared." My husky response hangs in the air between us.

"Mm, well judging from that scent I would say you fucking loved it." His voice is harsh in my ear. _Oh Shit. Is he mad at me?_

Next thing I know Elliot has pushed me down in a chair that one of the other frat boys has placed behind me. I am still in the middle of the dance floor but the crowd has cleared except for the frat boys and Elliot. The music changes to an updated hip hop version of Its Raining Men. Elliot places his hands on my hot flushed cheeks as the frat boys stalk around us in a seemingly random pattern to the music. _What the hell is this?_ Every now and then one of them drapes a hand across my shoulders or touches my hair or turns to push a pelvis or a butt cheek into me. All the while Elliot stands there, moving his hips, legs apart, arms outstretched to hold my face, letting them grope me. Then they all line up in a v formation in front of me with Calvin in the front, Elliot to his right and three others all of equal good looks and similar build. _Every Specimen! Tall, blonde, dark and lean Rough and tough and strong and mean._ Calvin counts them in.

"5,6,7,8" And then they start to move accenting every faux thunder clap in the music. A chasse to the left in synchronisation followed quickly by a swivel and some body popping. Facing away from me, they all place their hands on their butts then swipe their arms sharply out before shaking their asses rapidly. They turn back to the front and move into a semi circle around me crumping with pelvic and chest thrusts into my face. By this time my jaw has dropped to the floor. The routine is slick and polished and I can't take my eyes off my man who in the midst of all this grinding testosterone is all serious, sultry and pouty and goddam sexy as hell. They drag step away from me and the group rotates so that Elliot faces me and while the others continue to dance for everyone else, his eyes stay firmly locked on me. They're all hip hop and body popping with a whole heap of hip roll, crotch grabs and pelvic thrusts and then they break and head to various points of the floor to crump and thrust at any available woman who is daring enough to face them. The lines are about three or four deep.

I bite my lip watching Elliot head for the bar, directly away from me while the others entice eager women around the edge of the dance floor and begin gyrating with them. If I had been paying attention would have seen money being tucked into various gaps in their clothing but I am still too focused on my boyfriend. Elliot turns suddenly to face me, whips his shirt over his head and comes sliding across the floor to me on his knees. He stops at my feet and lays back on the floor before shimmying up and jumping from his knees to his feet. The crowd is cheering and clapping and I now I notice women planting kisses and notes on the other frat boys. Elliot moves around the outside of my chair then stops and straddles my lap. His pelvis is grinding into my face and I can't resist reaching up to grab his hips. Then he half lies over me, propping his arms on the chair and he starts to do a series of press ups on me that must look like he is humping me.

His moves are so practiced and sensual it takes my breath away. _This is my man and he is part of some exotic dance team? How the hell did I not know this?_ To my left Ethan is laughing at me and my eyes feel like they must be popping out of my head. Elliot's six pack abs are tight and toned and slick with sweat. I rub my hands up his stomach and I know I'm wet with longing for him. Of course as I glance around the room I realize that I am probably not the only one creaming themselves over his moves. He looks at me all sexy with his serious pout. _Shit this is seriously fucking hot._

Elliot keeps grinding and humping a little longer then turns to wiggle his sweetly toned tush into my face for a few bars before turning and flicking open the button to his jeans. He takes my hand and slides it down the inside of his thighs then back up and he bucks against my hand as it reaches his crotch. What surprises me is that he isn't really hard. _How can he not be hard when I am squirming in my chair?_ _Is that part of their training. Resisting erect! _Then the boys all join him in the middle of the floor again in formation as they perform a final sequence of moves guaranteed to tempt the panties off any hot blooded woman and they all finish by dropping their jeans to the floor revealing, of all things, matching form fitting Calvin Klein boxer briefs.

The crowd goes wild as they pull their jeans back on. They are all slapping each other on the back but Elliot walks straight over to me and pulls me up into a searing tongue thrashing kiss and this time he is rock hard by the end of it.

"Enjoy the show baby." His eyes are glistening with humor.

"What the hell was that?" I demand, I don't know whether to laugh or be pissed at him. Ethan comes over and joins us.

"Bro that was amazing. I watched those women and they got so hot under the collar while you were doing that. Thanks for getting the room ready for the rest of us mere mortals to get some action." He is laughing but looking around to see if he can get lucky. I don't think that my brother needs any assistance picking up women but I can see what he means. The women here are extremely open now to any and all approaches. "I'll see you guys back at the villa. You good baby girl?" He looks directly at me and I nod. Big brother first, stud second. He looks directly at Elliot, "You break her heart and I'll have to break your arms man, no matter how cool you are. Laters." His words to Elliot hold as much promise as threat and his protectiveness surprises me. He moves off to join Calvin and the boys.

"I want to get you home, baby." Elliot whispers into my ear. "Watching you on the dance floor made me want to fuck you hard."

"I thought we didn't fuck and I am not sure I have forgiven you for cocktail chick. You have some explaining to do." I dig a manicured finger into his still naked chest. It scratches him slightly and leaves a mark on his otherwise perfect skin. Then I look from Calvin to him and have an epiphany. _OMG he manscapes! How did I not notice this before?_ He walks over to pick up his shirt and puts it back on then wraps an arm around me. We stop at a table outside the bar windows and perch on the tall chairs. A waitress comes over with a flirtatious smile for Elliot and deposits two glasses of beer in front of us. He ignores her and I want to scratch her eyes out. _Mine, bitch, all mine._

"Now talk Grey. What the hell was that?" I pin him with my stare giving him no wriggle room.

He takes a long swallow of his drink then places his glass on the table. He looks at me as if he is considering where to start and then speaks. "You wanted to know about Sirens. Well, you've just seen what my involvement at Sirens was all about."

"What? You were a male stripper?"_ Fuck._ That means he worked at Eros. How many women do I know have been to Eros for a girls night out? How many of my friends have seen Elliot up close and personal. _Why the hell have I never been there?_ "Why? When?"

"Calm down. When we were younger Christian got into trouble. He was 17 about to go off to college and I was 19 still in an apprenticeship. Christian used to get in a lot of fights, he was a really angry kid from the time he hit puberty and then suddenly about the time he turned 15 he started to turn a corner you know, like he really started to pull himself together with school and everything. For a couple of years there were no fights then one day I get a call and he is in trouble. The kind of trouble that requires a large sum of money. We couldn't call Mom and Dad, by this stage they were kind of over our shit, you know. So I had to find a way to get a lot of cash. A guy I knew worked in Sirens as a waiter. He got me the job and it paid well. All I had to do was dance."

"So you became an exotic dancer. And the guys in there?"

"My original crew. We still do the odd show for fun or charity but we really gave it up a few years back."

"When the business grew?" He nods. "So why are they here? In Barbados?"

"They knew I was coming down here. That's the crew that have been working in Haiti. When they heard we were going to be here they decided it would be fun to have their holiday in Barbados. You're not angry are you?"

I laugh. "With them, no. You, I'm not sure." He looks crestfallen. "It's okay. I'm not really mad, stunned, surprised, completely knocked out at your amazing moves but not mad. I was more worried about why you left the villa."

He runs his hand through his hair. "Shit, Kate, I don't know. These last few days just feel like a fucking emotional overload. I needed to get away. Blow off some steam with the boys. I didn't mean to worry you."

I'm kind of hurt that he couldn't blow off steam with me. "Why didn't you just tell me they were here? We don't have to live in each others pockets. I would have understood." _Would you really Kate?_

"I was going to. I had it all set that I would show you tonight and tell you about Sirens. Hell, I even came down here last night to meet them and run the routine. Its just, today was so..."

My hand closes over his. "It's okay. Neither of us expected what happened today. So Ethan was right, he did see you last night."

"Yeah, I'm sorry I lied. I wanted it to be a surprise. You seemed so fucking worried about Sirens and I wanted to show you this so you would understand. At least I hoped you would."

"Mmm...understand is not really what springs to mind. My boyfriend was a male stripper..." I catch the look of dismay on his face, "...sorry, exotic dancer. That's some heavy shit, Grey. And women, they have always thrown themselves at you like that when you dance? Like Miss Red in there?"

He nods, "Yeah, pretty much. But that is what I was trying to tell you, baby. Fuck, we would get women in there from all walks of life and I won't lie to you and say I didn't score. But I turned down more than I ever took up. When the daughters and wives of my parents friends started to show up it was a double bind. They would proposition me and generally I would say no. But then they would tell everyone that they slept with me and I couldn't deny it or they would let the world know what I was doing with my nights. I didn't want Mom and Dad to know. It was easier just to back up the lie than to tell the truth and risk my folks finding out."

"The stories of your sexual success are greatly exaggerated huh?" I smile.

"Well, yeah. Like I told you, I'm no saint but..."

"I get it. But did you say wives?"

"Yeah, fucked up, huh?"

"Yeah, I reckon."

Just then the other guys wander out to join us. Calvin is the obvious leader and he smiles as he deposits two more drinks in front of us.

"James, this is my girlfriend, Kate. Kate this is James, my business partner, Mike, TJ, and Will." I shake hands with them all as they take a seat around the table. They are so friendly and they all lean in to kiss my cheek as they shake hands. They are all hot with great bodies and getting a lot of attention from inside the bar that they ignore. I can feel envious eyes on me as the women inside the bar look on. Miss Red wanders over and wraps her arm around Elliot's shoulder. He greets her with a smile.

"Stella, this is my girlfriend Kate." In contrast to what I saw inside the bar earlier their body language now says that they really are just friends. There is a complete absence of sexual tension which is great. I won't have to challenge her to a bitch-slapping fight or yell at Elliot about predatory ex-girlfriends. My heart is jumping for joy.

"Girlfriend?" She gives a wide, open smile that reaches her eyes. "Since when do you do girlfriend? I thought you were gay." The guys all laugh with her, completely relaxed. He picks up my hand and holds it. She reaches over to take my hand. "It's really nice to finally meet you Kate."

"She's mine. And I am very definitely hers." Elliot doesn't take his eyes off me placing a very gentle kiss on my hand that nets a whoop from the boys at the table as Stella grins at us. I don't take my eyes off his and he bends in for a chaste kiss on the lips. He is branding me for these people. I understand this and I want the same. _Mine._

"Come on Stella, come dance with me." TJ grabs her hand and pulls her inside She glances back but Elliot still hasn't stopped looking at me. She gives me a conspiratorial wink.

"Nice to meet you, Kate." TJ wraps an arm around her and they laugh as they walk back into the club.

"She's nice. I like her. Is she TJ's girlfriend?" A look passes between the boys.

"No, she's more a team mascot," James replies. _What the hell does that mean?_

"Guys, I am going to take this beautiful lady home. Thanks for the dance." Elliot throws out to them without looking.

"Sure thing Elliot, will we catch you guys around tomorrow?" Mike asks. "We're heading over to Haiti the day after to get started on that shipment from Atlanta so we won't be around after that. Liana wondered if you were going to come over and see the kids." This comment has me wondering.

"No promises guys. We might not surface too early tomorrow." Elliot says and the table lets out a lecherous groan. "Laters, guys." In that moment I see what these men mean to him. They are special in his life, good friends who have his back and have shared his dreams.

"Laters." I call out as we walk off down the road. He wraps his arm around my shoulder and gazes down at me, giving me a quick peck before we pick up the pace and head back to the villa.

The lovemaking for the rest of the night is inventive and passionate. He is everything I have ever wanted and never knew how to wish for. He attends to my needs like they are his own and we fly over and over until the light starts to seep into our room. As the dawn starts to break we fall asleep in each others arms completely sated and my love replete. My dreams are full of hot male bodies which makes for an interesting late morning start.

When I wake up Elliot is standing on the balcony talking on the phone.

"Jesus, is Gail okay?...Fuck, what was she thinking...No, of course...Ana is coming back in tonight?...Yeah, look things will probably be fine...Disappeared...fuck...no, I don't know. Look, I'm sure he is pretty bloody shaken by it but if he and Ana had a great time in Georgia, like you say, then perhaps this won't be such a big deal...Yeah, well, I'm more worried about Gail. What a shitty fucking thing to have to go through...Look after her man. And give her my love... Sure call if you need anything."

Elliot turns to see me standing in the doorway.

"What is it?"

"One of Christian's ex-subs tried to kill herself in his apartment yesterday."


	35. Chapter 35

******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

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******Thanks And1rea for the idea for this conversation. Nearly at the end of Book 1!**

_******One public face in a private Limousine **_

_******Flash photograph, it's the only light you see **_

_******No secret life, there's no secret you can steal **_

_******Your lips are moving but I will never know what they mean**_

_******Kiss and tell, money talks **_

_******And love, it burns **_

_******Kiss and tell, give and take **_

_******We live and learn**_

******_-Kiss and Tell - Bryan Ferry_  
**

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"**_One_ **of his subs?" Great, I've accidentally revealed yet another secret in the Christian Grey BDSM portfolio. Kate has that look that says 'these fucking Grey men are doing my head in' and I don't really blame her. "Could you clarify for me what you mean by one of...?" Busted Grey! You big dork. She does the petulant but oh, so fucking sexy, hands-on-hips thing that seems to have become a permanent part of her repertoire since she met me. Made all the more sexy by the fact that she is completely naked except for having thrown one of my shirts on. _Here we go_, my hand goes through my hair as I try to find a way to answer her that isn't going to cause World War Three.

"Fuck, Kate, I don't know. According to Jason, there have been a few." _Trying for honesty here._ I don't really know how many there have been and I don't want to know. Kate obviously does.

"Define a few, Elliot." _What you thought she would let you off easy? She wants facts._

"A few, I don't know, more than 5 less than 50." _Shit, that sounds bad, even to me._ Her eyes are like lasers aimed at me.

"Less that 50?"

"Way less. My understanding is that he has always been monogamous in these relationships."

"So they weren't just contractual...they were exclusive? Fuck!" _What? What did I miss?_ "Do you guys have no idea the way that the average female mind works?"

"What does that mean? They would have all known what they were getting into. They would have agreed to it."

"I am sure that they went into that way but you and Christian...you are two of the most eligible and desirable men on the planet. You ooze charm and charisma and so does Christian even when he is being a cold prick that just wants to rule the world. How long did he think it would last before one of these girls saw their 'exclusive' relationship as something more? Shit, I am calling Ana." She marches back inside the room to find her phone muttering about morons and arrogant pigheaded men with commitment phobias. _Oh no, Kate, not on my watch._ I charge at her like a linebacker, pick her up and pin her arms tight to her body. She squeals and kicks her legs which only serves to press her butt suggestively against me and make me hard. Of course, she is only wearing my shirt so I was half way there already. "Fuck, Elliot, don't be such a fucking adolescent. Put me down."

I'm the adolescent. Shit, she's the one who wants to leap in and do the BFF thing with Ana at the drop of a hat without thinking through the consequences. I never know if she wants to protect Ana or simply gather dirt. No scratch that, I know she cares about Ana, I am just worried that she keeps wanting to do this bull in a china shop approach to problem solving. We both need more information.

"Not until you promise not to call Ana." I spit out through gritted teeth as I wrestle her away from the dresser where her phone is sitting in plain sight. _Jesus, she almost got me in the nuts with that kick._ Placing her on the ground I step away to preserve myself and she turns on me.

"No. If one of these women can get into his apartment then how many others will she have to deal with? This one obviously fell in love with Christian at some point and doesn't want to let him go. Trying to kill yourself in an ex's apartment is a pretty fucking loud cry for help. I need to make sure Ana knows what is going on." She has a point, several actually, but give Kate an inch and I suspect she will take a few thousand miles.

"I will tie you up and lock you in the bedroom if you try, Kate. This is none of our business and Christian is handling it. He won't let anything happen to Ana." _Will he?_

"What? Like he took care of this other girl. And Gail? Was it Gail who had to look after her after she did it? Have you got any guarantee that Ana is safe? And what did you mean when you said 'disappeared'? Who has disappeared?" _Can't think, must get Kate to calm down._ Turning her quickly I slide an arm around her body, pick her up again and move through the room with her firmly captive against my hip. I start to gather items. A couple of bathrobe belts, the one from my jeans and a blue tie I from the closet. Throwing her down on the four poster bed, I trap her firmly against the bed. It only takes a few moments to get her tied spreadeagle to the posts while she hurls a steady stream of abuse at me.

"Well, now what?" Echoing my thoughts,she glares at me. "Are you going to beat me into submission? Isn't that what Christian would do? You know if I wanted to date Christian I would have turned up to that first interview." I scowl as I sit down next to her.

"You don't fight fair. I am trying to protect you from yourself." Her body goes very still as she stares at the canopy above the bed and seemingly concentrates on not moving a muscle. Now I get the silent treatment. Time to try and reason with her. "Are you going to let me explain?" She continues to focus all her attention at the ornate carving above her head. "For a start it is too late to call Ana because she is probably already in the air on her way back to Seattle. Secondly, Christian has got an entire investigative team out looking for this girl who disappeared after checking herself out of the hospital. Gail is shaken but fine. She has Jason with her and he is not going to let anything happen. She will probably go off to her sisters for the weekend anyway. As far as Jason can tell this girl is only a threat to herself."

Her eyes shoot to mine."If she is only a threat to herself then why does Christian need an investigative team?" Because he cares.

"I presume because he doesn't want her to hurt herself. He must be pretty shaken by the whole thing happening in his apartment." Kate processes this.

"So he cares for this girl." Again echoing my thoughts but coming from her it becomes an accusation.

"Jesus, Kate, he is not a heartless bastard. Maybe he didn't realize that this girl was invested in him emotionally but if it had happened to me I would care too." Our eyes lock. Her mind is whirring behind that look, which only scares me. "You're angry at me for tying you up, I get that. But you're angry at Christian for something he can't even help."

"He slept with the girl; was in a relationship, however warped, with her. Tell me how is this not his fault."

"Shit, Kate, it could have been a long time ago for all we know. Who is to say that some looney from your past isn't going to come back and try to top himself to prove a point the moment I propose to you." She gives me a startled look. "What, you don't think someone might get jealous?'

"No, and you just..." She shakes her head with a secret smile. Yeah, you heard me. Her body calms and she looks at me. "Is there anything that we can do?"

"Maybe. Probably not. You could send a text to Ana, ask how her holiday to Georgia went." I begin to untie her. Not that the thought of having her right now, half naked and tied to the bed doesn't do it for me but last night was pretty strenuous and I am sure she needs a break. "Perhaps she might choose to call and then you would know she is alright. But if she does, babe, you are going to have to be careful not to let it slip that you know any of this."

"Elliot, how long are we going to do this cloak and dagger, shit? At some point don't you think we should confront them?"

"And say what, Kate? This is their private sexual life. Do you want me to kiss and tell? Should I go and tell Christian all about the different ways I have fucked you or how good you are at a blow job? Or how you enjoyed being spanked the other night and how creamy and wet you got just now being tied up?"

The blush goes from head to toes as I watch her. "Oh!" She almost looks contrite.

"Babe, just be careful what you say to her. In the meantime I might call my brother." Rubbing her wrists she picks up some pants and does up the buttons the shirt before grabbing her phone to text Ana. I head outside to phone Christian.

"Bro, how's it hanging"

"Hey, Elliot." He sounds distracted. "What do you want?"

"Oh, nothing much, just thought I would check and see how you are? We had an incident here yesterday that got me thinking about Christopher and I just needed to hear your voice." This part is true.

"Shit, what incident? What the hell happened?" I know he is worried that this is connected to his problems. It isn't that he is so egotistical that it all has to revolve around him, it's just that he lacks the confidence to understand that sometimes I just might simply need my brother. That there might be more to us than the fact we were adopted by the same parents. It hurts, but it is Christian and despite his quirks, I love him.

"Some kids got into trouble at the beach. Kate and I helped to rescue them. It just took me back, you know?" I have shared this part of my history with him before. Christian, better than anyone, knows that there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about my mother and my brother.

"Man, I'm sorry bro. Kate helped?" _Don't sound so surprised._

"Yeah, she was fucking awesome bro. Didn't think twice about diving in and pulling them to shore and then administering CPR. We saved this kid's life and it felt fucking amazing. She is amazing." _So amazing and I wish you could see her the way I see her, bro._

I hear him exhale. "Wow, I know I shouldn't sound so surprised but...I didn't think she had it in her. I guess I underestimated Miss Kavanagh. So how is Barbados?"

"Oh, you know, beautiful one day, perfect the next."

"And Kate's family?"

"Great, really welcoming. They're good people. Any news from the home front?"

"I have just got back from a business trip to Georgia so I haven't spoken to the folks."

"Oh, did you catch up with Ana while you were there?" _I know you did, what will you tell me._

"Yeah, I took her soaring, she loved it."

"Cool. How is she? Kate hasn't heard from her for a couple of days."

"Great, she will be back tonight. I'll be glad when I know she is back safe and sound in Seattle." _Very telling, bro._ "Tell Kate she is fine. I'm looking after her."

"Oh, good. Yeah I will pass that on...Is everything okay? You sound stressed."

"Fine, just a lot on at the moment." The edge is in his voice but he won't say more.

"I get that. You would tell me if there was anything wrong, wouldn't you?"

"No, but thanks any way." This fucks me off. I would tell him everything, share all of my problems and joys, and I do. Christian always plays it cool. Has ever since...no I won't go back to that. Dead and buried.

"Okay, give my love to everyone...Laters, dude."

"Laters, Lelliot." And the use of that name alone tells me that his emotions are pretty fucking close to the surface.


	36. Chapter 36

_****__******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**_

* * *

_**We're gonna burn what we never mean **_

_**If it hurts if it's killing me **_

_**Throw it in the fire then we walk away **_

_**Start over from another place**_

_**There's a bonfire burning up **_

_**You just throw it on the fire **_

_**Sometimes the flames burn high **_

_**There's a bonfire burning up **_

_**You just throw it on the fire **_

_**Sometimes and wave goodbye**_

_**-Bonfire - Meese-  
**_

* * *

Why do I feel like we have resolved everything and nothing today? I tried to get hold of Ana and got a few short texts from the airport lounge before she boarded her plane to say that everything was fine but not much else. Ever since she met Christian it feels like she has been holding back from me and it is so not like her. Or is that just what I want to think? She has always been my sounding board when it came to relationships but since this is the first relationship that I have ever seen her in, how would I know how much she wants to share with her best friend? Maybe it isn't Christian? Maybe she has always been this private and since I have a tendency to dominate every conversation I have simply never noticed.

How much am I prepared to tell her about Elliot? In the past I would have been so quick to reveal all the dirt on every guy I went out with but now...I don't know. Elliot has trusted me so much. Would I betray that trust? I am still prepared to tell Ana how much he rocks my world but that is not the same as sharing the sensitive and damaged side of him. There is this fragile part that he is asking me to take care with. The problem is how can I protect him from me? The lover and friend wants to guard him zealously while the journalist in me wrestles with the idea of exposing him and laying all his secrets bare. And I know there are still secrets, still things that he has not and maybe never intends to reveal.

His words today stopped me in my tracks. How would I feel if he was telling Christian, or James, any of the details of our sexual relationship? In the past that seemed to be part of the fall out of being me. Any guy who got near Kate Kavanagh usually had a story to tell his mates over a few drinks later and most of that was exaggerated. I am so used to that side of getting involved with men that to have Elliot all but admit he is going to defend my honor and keep our private life private is almost a novelty. Elliot Grey, honorable rake, who knew?

Our fight this afternoon is still sitting like a lump in my throat with nothing really resolved. Elliot and I may never be able to reach any real agreement about how to deal with Ana and Christian but we have acknowledged that our opposing philosophies are about how we best feel we can protect them as people we love. This gives me hope that we are at least coming from the same value set and tonight, at least, I want to forget how helpless and frustrated I feel being away from Ana.

The cooler evening breeze blows through the palm trees as Ethan, Elliot and I wander down to the beach to join the Eros frat boys for a bonfire. As we approach I see the guys and Stella plus a few of the other staff members from Zanzibar's. There are guitars, drinks and the smell of bananas being baked in the embers. The group shouts out a welcome to us as we arrive.

James walks over specifically to greet us and wraps me in a big hug spinning me around with a big sexy grin on his face.

"Hey, Miss Kate, so you finally dragged your old man out of the sack. Great that you could join us. Mmmm... you smell good, girl." I can't help a flirtatious giggle at his enthusiasm. He glances at Elliot who punches him in the arm with a mock frown.

"Hey, put her down, she's mine. And less of the old man. As for noticing her smell, that just confirms our long held suspicions that you really are a sick creepy pervert." _He trusts James with me. Interesting._

James grabs Elliot in a head lock and they wrestle each other to the ground before TJ steps in and dacks James, causing him to release Elliot and chase TJ further up the beach. Laughing, Elliot recovers, wraps his arm around me and guides me over to find a seat by the fire.

"Hey Kate, welcome. Do you want a drink? Wine or beer?" Stella's smile is genuine and open as she reaches into a cooler bag beside her.

"Oh, beer thanks." I smile as she passes it to me. I really like this girl and wonder how I could have though differently about her last night. "Thanks. Are they always like this?" We watch them charging around like five year olds.

"Worse!" Stella and Elliot say in unison and we all laugh. Our bottles make a clinking sound as we toast each other then move to the fire. We quickly settle in and soon Elliot and Will have taken up the guitars playing through song after song as we all join in singing. They are both really good and the guys even have the harmonies worked out. It sounds so good that soon others are joining us. Elliot is in his element, even more relaxed doing this than at any other time I can recall, except perhaps in those post-coital moments in bed.

Eventually the storytelling begins and I don't remember when I have laughed so much as they regale us with the near misses they have had both at Sirens and on building sites. Mike was at Sirens first and longest amongst the group.

"So those were the days where we still did full frontal. Embarrassing man." Mike blushes.

"Would have been embarrassing for you. Who would have known that you were naked? You need a microscope to find it." TJ teases. Stella swats him on the thigh and he feigns a painful injury.

"Don't joke man. This one night I am up there doing my thing and there are the usual hen night groups there. Anyway, someone gets this one BTB to sit right in the front of the runway."

"BTB?" I am feeling a little ignorant but I ask any way.

"Bride to be." Will replies.

"Oh."

"Yeah, so she is sitting there gazing up at me with her eyes all loving and glazed and she is giggling all the way through as if I am just the best thing she has seen. I go into my final moves, drop the whole lot and shake my package above her. Well, she just continues to giggle and stare but her reaction doesn't really change. No shock, no embarrassment, no lascivious lip licking. Nothing. When I get backstage I am pretty shattered that I haven't been able to get a better reaction from her. Later I go out to work the audience and her girlfriends let it slip that this chick usually wears glasses and decided not wear them tonight because she thinks she looks prettier without them. No contacts, no nothing. Blind as a bat without them. Consequently she missed the whole thing."

"Nah, man, even with a telescope she would have been hard pressed to find it." TJ earns himself a cold mushy banana in the chest for this one.

Next Will pipes up. "Yeah, well at least you haven't stepped backwards off the apron. l broke my tail bone and couldn't sit down properly for a month."

"Oh so that is what happened. We all thought you were putting out for Zeke." TJ cuts in and this comment earns him a sharp stare from all the boys. I am confused by this but before I can ask Elliot cuts in.

"Yes, but have you ever forgotten your black g-string?" Elliot asks and the guys all laugh except for TJ who groans and stares at the ground shaking his head.

"Oh man, I am never gonna live that down, am I?"

"Please explain." I look at Elliot.

"The black thong is a staple in our wardrobe and no dancer would be without it. TJ couldn't find it this one night and he had to wear an alternative which turned out to be one with a big fucking, yellow, smiley face on it. He thought it would be okay since the lights went straight to the black out at the end of the routine and he is at the back of the formation. So we finish and all turn around and there is TJ, standing there with a big glow in the dark smiley staring back from his crotch. I thought Zeke was going to kill him."

"Zeke?"

"Zeke is the manager, MC and choreographer at Eros. Camp as a row of pink frilly tents but real popular with the ladies and a great guy to boot. But that night he had critics in the audience to do a review. I thought he was going to blow a gasket." James explains.

"Yeah, well I think he blew the critic that night just to cover for that one." Will throws in. Ah now I get the comment about Zeke earlier and I wonder if Will is gay too.

"Ew, Will..." Stella throws a shell at Will playfully and he gives her a big grin. There is something in his eyes that makes me think he wants more as I look from Will to Stella. And perhaps she does too. _Mmm...maybe not gay._ I notice that tonight Stella has spent the evening leaning back against James' and he has his arms around her shoulders, but she is looking at Will now with almost longing and once again I wonder what the relationship is with her and the guys. She seems really comfortable with all of them and they are very inclusive and protective of her. I get the impression tonight that she is like a sister to them all. Except maybe Will judging by the look on his face too. Knowing that now is not the time to ask I store up my questions for later. There is a story here, I just know it.

oOo

It is late when Ethan, Elliot and I head back to the villa but we all decide to go for a late swim before bed. For the first time in the last two weeks I am starting to feel like I actually relax about Elliot but I am still worried about Ana.

"Do you think everything is alright in Seattle?" Elliot shoots me a look to shut me up in front of Ethan but I have already peaked his interest.

"Why? What is happening in Seattle?"

"I am just a little worried about Ana living in the apartment by herself. It seems like a pretty shitty thing for us to move cities and then for me to just up and leave her." Elliot seems to release a breath as I try to spin a plausible story for my brother.

"Isn't she seeing your brother?" Ethan looks at Elliot.

"Yeah, but it is pretty casual, you know. I am not sure how serious she is about him." I almost hope that my words are true and Elliot gives me the evil eye.

"I'm sure they are fine, that she is fine, Kate." His voice is quiet and almost threatening.

"Yeah, well, we will be back there next week and then we get to live in the shag pad together."

"Ethan! Don't call it that. And you will not be having a revolving door policy while you are living with Ana and me." I thump him hard on the shoulder and he groans. Elliot looks pissed.

"The real issue is that we might not be going back next week." Elliot wipes water out of face. He looks tired.

"Oh?" Ethan is rubbing his arm and looking at the both of us for answers. During the evening James talked to Elliot and I quietly about the situation on Haiti. The guys are in the middle of rebuilding a boarding school for a large group of orphaned children. Their friend Liana, a French national volunteer who has settle permanently on the island, has been the driving force behind the project but they are running behind schedule. James hoped that Elliot would be able to go to Haiti for a week after our holiday to help out.

We explain this to Ethan. "So you are going too, Sis?"

"I want to help. I am sure that Dad won't mind if we stay on and this would really mean a lot to those kids."

"Well, don't worry about Ana. I will go back as planned. While I would like to help you guys out I have to get my applications sorted out for grad school and I have a couple of interviews set up already. I can make sure that Ana is okay."

"Yeah, just don't try any of your moves on her while I'm not there." I narrow my eyes and glare at him. His hands shoot up in the air.

"Not me. I'll be a good boy, scout's honor."

"You were never a boy scout." I reply.

Ethan turns to Elliot, "However, if your brother has stepped out of the picture or stuffed up in any way then all bets are off man. Ana is hot and I always promised myself that I would tap that if the opportunity came my way."

Elliot and I both frown at him, "Hey, don't talk about my friend that way."

"Just telling it like it is, sis. I'm off to bed. See you guys in the morning."

oOo

_**You set it again, my heart's in motion **_

_**Every word feels like a shooting star **_

_**I'm at the edge of my emotions **_

_**Watching the shadows burning in the dark **_

_**And I'm in love And I'm terrified **_

_**For the first time and the last time In my only **_

_**I only said it 'cause I mean it**_

_** I only mean 'cause it's true **_

_**So don't you doubt what I've been dreaming **_

_**'Cause it fills me up and holds me close whenever I'm without you**_

**_-Terrified - Katharine McPhee-_**

* * *

There has been a subtle shift in Elliot's mood since the discussion about going to Haiti with James. He seems resigned and almost sad. I put it down to being tired but as we lie in bed kissing I begin to recognize the signs that he is withdrawing again. This constant ebb and flow of emotion is becoming exhausting and I long for playful and challenging Elliot. Sexy and soulful Elliot is beautiful and tempting but he always feels like he is on the verge of saying good bye.

"Baby, tell me what's wrong." My hands stroke through his hair as he lets out a long sigh. I feel it as he pulls a little further away from me in his head. Right now he could go through the motions of making passionate love to me and then withhold himself for the rest of the night. _Please don't do this again._

"Sshh, I just want to touch you." _No. Not this shutting down sex again. I can't take it._ I know that he will make me soar physically and emotionally and then he will pull away like the soft death of a shooting star as it travels through the night sky. Desperately I try to think of some way to bring him back to me, some way to make him stay with me. Just so he will be totally invested in this moment and not leave me again.

"Tie me up." His hands freeze their motion down my body, his mouth hovers inches from my breast. He looks into my eyes, seeking confirmation.

"What did you say?"

"I said, tie me up, please." Placing my hands over my head I grab the belts that he left attached to the posts earlier this afternoon. "Please, Elliot, I want this." He is very still except for the jump of his highly charged erection pressed into my thigh.

"Okay." Within minutes he has me tethered by my wrists and ankles to the bed posts. His eyes have darkened and his body tremors with barely restrained lust as he sits back to survey his handy work. The sensation of his eyes on my exposed body starts a fire deep inside my stomach, my heart is pounding and I know that the musky scent that has filled the air is from the pool of moisture between my legs.

Moving to my feet he begins a lazy journey with his hands and tongue. While his skin meets mine through his calloused palms sliding down my legs from thigh to calf, his mouth nips and licks at my instep and ankles. This a slow and tortuous worship of skin and muscle as he journeys up my limbs and the ache between my legs intensifies with every touch. Just when I think he might be progressing towards the end I want he traces back over his steps, this time blowing softly in electrifying waves fo warm air over my highly sensitized skin. Occasionally he pauses to look at my face, checking my reaction and the heady mixture of love and lust almost brings me to the brink. I feel so on the edge that the slightest word from him could tip me over but he is silent, reverent in his lovemaking.

His hands slide under my backside, palming the fleshy cheeks and making me thrust my hips upwards into his face. His nose nuzzles my clit before he pulls back to look and then he places a gentle kiss on the hard nub. I nearly shoot off the bed, pulling at the restraints as I go so that they tighten almost painfully around me. His hands have moved to part my folds before his tongue licks up through the creamy wetness and I whimper softly, trying not to let go too soon.

"My beautiful, Katie. I love you like this. Where you can't get away from me. Tell me what you want." His voice is a husky whisper as he licks again.

"Oh, please." Mine is a small cry of desperate need.

"Please, what baby? Tell me."

"Elliot, I need to come. Please, I need you inside me." My pelvis thrusts into his face desperately seeking his whispered heat.

His fingers push inside me finding that electric spot that makes me want to push down on him. He is almost still as I thrust and move on him then he follows with his tongue and it is more than I can bare. My gasping cries echo through the room as my clit begins to pulse and he holds me there, riding out my pleasure to the bitter end.

No sooner am I coming down than he is ramping me up again as he kisses and licks over my stomach, climbing slowly up towards my breasts. One hand is still working inside me while the other palms my breast, his teeth and tongue biting and flicking at my aching nipple sending more aftershocks south. My eyes cloud over as he plays my body, strumming and plucking me like one of his cherished guitars. I want desperately to break free and hold his face, gaze into his eyes but the restraints are too firm.

Soon he is hovering over me, placing gentle tender kisses on my mouth, my cheeks, my eyes, my jaw. With every kiss he murmurs, "I. Love. You. I. Love. You. Beautiful. Kate. Mine. Always. Mine. My. Love." I taste myself on his tongue, the salty tang and muskiness spiking my pleasure.

Bracing himself on one arm, he grabs his cock and strokes the full impressive length of it before inserting himself into me. The first sharp thrust of his wide girth is almost painful, then he begins an excruciatingly slow withdrawal. All the while his eyes never leave mine as he repeats slowly, slowly building a rhythm. Our breathing is labored and harsh, our hearts hammering in our chests, our skin slick with sweat. The feeling grows again, building me up over and over until the sensation of hovering on the edge is almost painful in its intensity. He kisses and then pulls back to breath and every thrust is another groan of pleasure that I can't possibly hold back. Every emotion is pouring into a space in the center of my body ready to explode. I can feel his body shuddering with the same need.

"Come with me, Katie." A harsh mutter through gritted teeth and I let go, beginning a scream that he swallows with a kiss, his tongue sweeping through my mouth with every pump and pulse inside me. I am tense and quivering and crying with the pleasure and pain of it all. Before we are even close to coming down he reaches up and undoes my hands and I throw my arms around him gripping his shoulders with digging fingers. I can't seem to pull his body close enough.

My tears flow of their own free will and I sob into his chest. "Please stay with me, please don't leave me again."

"Sshh, baby, I'm here, I'm here." He holds my face and looks at me with concerned eyes. "What's wrong? Katie, I'm here. Shh." His thumbs swipe the tears from my cheeks as they fall.

"I...you...you were going to leave me, again. I couldn't stand it if you left." I cry almost incoherently murmuring my fears into his strong muscles.

"Sweetheart, what are you talking about? I am here, I will always be here." He quickly withdraws, unties my ankles and then pulls me up onto his lap as he sits across the bed.

"No, no, you're not. You were going to shut down on me. You were going to leave me. Like you did before. So..so distant."

His hand strokes my hair as he tries to hush me. I hold on for dear life, not realizing how much his moods were effecting me.

"Katie, I am here." He places his hand over my heart. "I am always here, even if we are far apart. I'm not leaving you ever."

His body begins to rock me gently like a child, soothing me in his strong arms. I feel cherished but I feel ... fragile and shaky, my body trembling against his warm skin. He kisses my hair.

"I'm sorry, it's just that these feelings are so ... big... and being with you has been like riding a roller coaster. Only sometimes you do this thing where you shut down and I feel like I am still on the ride, being flung about without you to protect and buffer me. I've never needed anyone so much and I love and hate that I need you. I always thought that when I found you it would be easy but it's not and I'm...I'm scared. I don't want to fall so much in love with you and wake up one day to find I wasn't enough."

"Katie, I think you have it the wrong way around. I'm the one who is terrified. Terrified that you are going to want more than me. I watch guys watching you, wanting you. And you, you just sparkle. You are interested in everything and you can talk to everyone about anything. And you're so fucking beautiful it hurts. I just wish that I didn't have to keep dumping all of this garbage on you. Every day it seems that there is something hovering there in my past that will drive you away. If it seems like I am withdrawing then it is because I don't want to see your disgust. I can't imagine how you must feel having to uncover another layer of me and my shit. I keep expecting you to ..."

"What? What do you expect me to do?" He is very quiet for a moment. Then softly he whispers against my hair and it sounds as much like a request as it does a fear.

"Run."


	37. Chapter 37

******This is the story of Kate and Elliot. Thanks to EL James for creating such wonderful characters and permitting us to play with them. Things will get raunchy from time to time - rated M for mmmm...naughty. I have included playlist notes but I am happy to receive your contributions especially if you think I have it wrong. Thanks for the encouraging reviews and apologies for the deviations from the original text. Enjoy!**

******Check out the playlist: youtube dot com / playlist?list=PL3gs_6xXYC3z_bSLND4Ye_47MQCAdKwKS (no spaces)  
**

* * *

******Here we are at the end of Book 1. Hope you have enjoyed it.  
**

_**************There is freedom within  
there is freedom without  
Try to catch a deluge in a paper cup  
There's a battle ahead  
many battles are lost  
But you'll never see the end of the road  
While you're traveling with me**_

_**Hey now, hey now**_  
_**Don't dream it's over**_  
_**Hey now, hey now**_  
_**When the world comes in**_  
_**They come, they come**_  
_**To build a wall between us**_  
_**We know they won't win**_

_**************-Don't Dream It's Over - Crowded House -**_

* * *

My mind is reeling from everything that I have learned about Elliot in the past few weeks. This has been exponentially accelerated by everything that I have learned in the past 48 hours and although I am tired from our lovemaking my body is feeling edgy and I can't sleep past 8 am. I am also worried sick about Ana and what might be happening back in Seattle. My brief contact with her yesterday has left me with the distinct impression that she had no idea about the sub.

Leaving Elliot, who is sleeping unusually late, wrapped in a sheet, his glorious bronzed body draped across our bed, I rise and put on a bikini to go down for a swim in the pool. After an hour I have burned off some energy with 30 or 40 laps of the pool and I surface to find the object of my affection and the source of my discomfort sitting on the side of the pool with his legs draped in the water. He holds out a glass of freshly squeezed juice to me and I hear the sounds of my family talking and eating in the alfresco room behind him.

"Hey beautiful." His smile is warm but with an underlying weariness. I guess he could be reeling with the impact and range of his personal revelations too. "I missed you this morning."

Swimming over to him I take the offered glass from his hand. "Thanks, I'm sorry. I felt a little restless this morning." When I look up into his eyes I see something almost raw that puts me back on edge. Although we spent a somewhat blissful evening last night he still hasn't resolved whatever was worrying him. "I guess there has been a lot to take in."

"I guess so." He looks kind of sad. "You know Kate, I meant what I said last night, I wouldn't blame you if you wanted to run screaming from me right now. I realize that there is a lot of stuff that you have found out about me. I really didn't want to overwhelm you with all my shit." Oh, God, now he can't even look at me and I don't know what to say to make it right. Yes, your life could rival a television soap opera. You have some wicked demons that have been hounding you all your life including whatever it is your brother has done or continues to do. You have a past that continues to want to walk up to me and bitch-slap me each day mostly because you dare to call me your girlfriend.

Instead of talking I move closer and turn to stand between his legs with my back to him. I place my arms on his strong thighs, take a sip of my drink and lean my head back against his stomach, letting out a sigh. I don't want to talk. I don't want to listen. I just want to be. His arms go around me and he leans down to rest his lips in my hair. We listen to the laughter from the table without hearing their words. The other sounds of the gentle waterfall that trickles into the pool, the birds and the distant sound of the surf beach all serve to relax us in this moment. It feels peaceful, ambient.

"Kate, I think I should leave with the guys today. Leave you and your family in peace. I think I have done enough to disrupt your holiday and you need some space from us, from me." His voice is quiet and sad. My body tenses up at the thought of him leaving me. Is this what I want? What I need? Or is _he_ running now? _I will not panic, I will not cry, I will not pout._

"I don't want you to go. And if you insist on leaving today then I want to be with you to help out." I finally say. His arms withdraw from around me and he reaches down to take my glass away placing it on the side of the pool. Then he slips into the water beside me drawing me into a strong embrace. His lips meet mine with a gentle tenderness that is mind blowing. As if, like last night, he needs to be reverent with his love.

"Kate, I don't want to leave you but I understand what you are going through right now. I think you need space." The hidden message is your life was tracking really nicely until hurricane Grey blew into your well-ordered world. He is right, but then isn't this what a relationship is all about? Aren't we meant to take the good with the bad, and if Elliot and I are in this for the long haul?

"Elliot you were the one who told me not so long ago that it was just a fight. That I would, if I remember correctly, not get off so lightly." He is awfully quiet. Time to bring out the big guns, Kate. "For better or worse, in good times and in bad." I whisper into his ear and then pull back to look at him. I am willing him to feel the love. To see past all my insecurities about him and his past and to see that I am not backing away. There is bewilderment in his gaze as he registers my words, then a smile breaks across his face that lights up my world.

"You mean that?"

I nod slowly. "With all my heart, Elliot. I am totally wrecked by everything right now and I know I haven't processed it all, but I am not running from you. Not now, not ever." And I know that I mean it with every fiber of my being. I reach out to bring his head to mine and seal my words with a kiss. His lips are barely open but I slip my tongue inside and unleash all of the passion that lies beneath the surface of my feelings right now. My legs go around his waist in the water and his reaction to me is instant. "Inside me now, Grey."

His eyes widen. "But your family are sitting right there." I look up to the alfresco which is sheltered behind a shade sail blind. We can hear them but not see them.

"Then we will just have to be quiet." I whisper. His groan is soft as he pulls his shorts down in the water to reveal a raging hard on. Whipping the strings of my bikini undone he quickly has me impaled on his erection and we begin to move together, not taking our eyes off each other. Our breathing is erratic, heavy and the limits to both our movement and our voices is intensely erotic. He reaches between us and starts to tease my clit with his thumb as he gently pumps me.

"If we are too quiet they will wonder what is happening." He says in a soft deep voice. I know that they will hear the tone but not be able to decipher the words any more than we can hear the content of their conversation.

"Then you will have to keep whispering to me so that they don't get suspicious." My voice is ragged and edged with desire. I wonder what that sounds like from a distance.

With each pump he speaks. "I. Love. You. So. Fucking. Much. Kate. Kavanagh. You. Are. Mine." I throw my head back with his words and movement trying hard not to emit the lustful moan that wants to come from me. He is building me up on his movement, his words, his look, his love. I can feel the fire seeping through the coolness of the water.

"Love me, Elliot, fuck me. I want to come around you." The words are husky, impassioned, whispered and all I can managed under the circumstances. His hands are sliding up and down my back, sometimes gripping my ass, other times holding my sides so near my breasts that they ache for his touch. My stiff, aching nipples chafe up and down his silky chest sending electric shocks south. His mouth bends to suck hard on one and it is all I can do not to cry out.

Suddenly the edge is near. My body is building to a strong explosion and my walls are clamping around his hard shaft taking him along with me. He gives one more flick over my clit and I silently erupt my mouth biting into his shoulder. I feel him gushing a warm hot jet of come into me as I pulse uncontrollably around him.

"Jesus, Katie," his voice a harsh whisper. "You are so fucking amazing."

"We are amazing." I smile as I lean my forehead against his trying to get my breathing back on track. Slowly we unwind from each other and get our clothes back in order before stopping for another mind blowing kiss. "Thank you."

"Ah, Kate, you are my pleasure." He grins at me before giving one last peck. Towing me over to the steps we emerge from the pool hand in hand and dry ourselves before heading to the breakfast table.

oOo

"Good morning, you two." My father calls as we approach the table to sit down. Fresh fruit is sliced and piled on a plate. A hovering staff member brings over platters from the hot plates on the sideboard and serves us bacon, eggs, tomatoes and hash browns. After our night and morning exercises we are both famished and tuck into the generous breakfast with gusto. My father raises an eyebrow and a look passes between he and my mother. She pats his hand and smiles at us. We both pause to look at them. By this time Ethan is shaking his head as he takes a long sip of his coffee as if he is trying not to laugh.

"What?" I ask with my mouth half full. Elliot is tense beside me, not looking up. _Oh my God, they know exactly what just went down in the pool_ and I blush furiously before putting my fork down. Suddenly I don't think I can eat another mouthful. Elliot's hand is gripping my thigh under the table.

"Elliot, how would you like to join me for a walk after breakfast." This is an order rather than a question. The tone of my father's voice says that he will take no argument. I look at Elliot trying to find a way to extricate him from this. He looks at me for a moment before turning to my father and nods his head.

"Certainly, sir."

"Kate, I think you and I should go shopping this morning. Don't you?" My mother asks sweetly.

"Yes, mother." I almost whisper, like a chastised child. I want to protest. I want to claim my right as an adult to do as I damn well please and not go through this third degree with my parents but I feel like a child who has been caught with their hand in the cookie jar. Elliot must think I am a prize weakling.

"Great, we will meet back here in half an hour." My mother announces and then my parents excuse themselves from the table for a quick walk down to the beach.

"Damn, you two really have to calm this thing down." Ethan is laughing at us, shaking his head. "I thought Dad was going to blow a gasket."

"Fuck." Elliot whispers glancing at me. I don't think I have blushed more furiously in my life.

"Mmmm, stating the obvious, don't you think?." Ethan laughs as he stands up. "I promise you, that if I am willing to break your arms then Dad is willing to do worse. Be prepared ... brother." He pauses to let that sink in and then winks at us.

I wait for Ethan to get out of earshot. "Elliot, don't let Dad bully you. It is not like they don't know we are sleeping together, for God's sake."

"Kate, there is a huge difference between us sharing a room and fucking in front of their eyes." He looks like he wants to be sick.

"Stop it. Dad wants to intimidate you. It's what he does. Maybe we shouldn't have done that but I would do it again in a heart beat and so would you."

He looks at me and then smiles as he pulls me into his lap. "I know sweetheart, and I am not scared of your Dad. But I want to make sure that he knows my intentions as far as you are concerned." His lips graze mine.

"Your intentions. And what would they be?" I ask, teasing his bottom lip with my teeth.

"Oh, you know. Knock you up and then leave you without a backward glance." He nuzzles my neck. I giggle. "Now come on, let's get this over with." He pushes me up and then stands taking my hand and leads me up to our room.

oOo

Twenty minutes later we depart, me with my mom and Elliot with Dad. Ethan is conspicuously absent. I wonder what Dad really wants to say to Elliot and hope that they don't end up having a major disagreement over what happened this morning. Somehow I know that Elliot can hold his own but I am still nervous.

My mother and I take a chauffeured car and head up to the craft villages that are further inland. It is cooler up here and we enjoy our wandering, gathering small samples of materials and art works that I know will end up featuring in Mom's next spring line.

"So you and Elliot are serious huh?" She asks as we sip fresh tropical punch in a street side bar.

"You knew we were before we came down here." I reply without looking at her.

"Katie, I understand being swept off your feet, God knows Elliot is a fine looking man. But don't you think you ought to slow down? Get to know each other a little better first?" The depth of her concern is easy to read. "You seem to be moving awfully fast and we are worried that one of you is going to get hurt."

"I know Mom, I worry about that too. I just don't see how there could be anyone else for me. Even if he does hurt me." This suddenly makes me feel sad and the tears start to well. I am trying to trust Elliot and we have come a long way but there are still secrets. Barbados is also lulling us into a false sense of security, Seattle and our real lives might not be so kind. Eventually I whisper,"And somehow I think that he will." The look she gives me lets me know that she is not talking about Elliot hurting me.

"What makes you say that sweetheart? He seems pretty genuine about you." My Mom does motherly concern so well. It is very reassuring that she thinks Elliot and I will work out.

"I worry that I won't be enough for him. He has so much...experience. Did you know that he was once an exotic dancer? He worked at that club, Eros, the one that is part of Sirens." My mother has paused with her drink half way to her mouth, looking down at the table. Shit, she knew!

"Darling, do you remember Marcy Clarke's daughter Ellie, who got married about 10 years ago? I designed her dress, it was one of the first commissioned jobs I did under my own label. I remember those last few days leading up to that wedding. We all went out to a club in Seattle and got terribly drunk. The bride to be and her friends propositioned some of the club employees. A couple of those girls got themselves into a world of trouble that night, cheating on their menfolk. Not me, of course, and not Marcy. Marcy left early to take Ellie's grandmother home. I stayed with the girls but they were all young women with strong minds and stronger appetites and all I could do was watch the show. Some of the boys who worked there 'attached' themselves, for want of a better word, to the girls, including Ellie. Oh, Lord, she was so drunk by this stage that I had my doubts about her getting home in one piece. The young man who spent time with Ellie, he was so sweet. He never let her leave the table except to dance, he held her hand and told her how beautiful she was and how lucky her fiance was. He stayed with her until she had sobered up some and then he made sure that she got home safely. I always remember that young man and thought that his mama must be very proud of him."

My eyes must be as large as saucers right now and watery to boot. "Mama, are you saying that was Elliot?" She nods. "Please don't say this just to make me feel better about him."

"Honey, I would never do that. There is more though. Ellie's marriage broke up less than a year later and I know that she put the story around that the affair that she had with Elliot Grey was the reason. I am also fairly sure that he never laid a finger on her. As far as I am concerned, Elliot Grey is one of the nicest young men I know. Don't get me wrong, his reputation is not completely unfounded and you may not be in for plain sailing here but I believe that if that boy has said that he loves you, then he means it. You're gonna have to learn how to trust him. Just like I have had to learn to trust your father again."

oOo

We arrive back at the villa for a late lunch and I race up to our room. Elliot is pacing the floor, obviously upset about something.

"Elliot, what is it? Did Dad threaten you, what did he say?"

Elliot shakes his head. "No, no, nothing like that. Things with your father are fine."

"Then what is it?" He doesn't reply, handing me his phone before running his hand through his hair. I read the screen.

_Crisis at Escala. Just returned from dropping Ana at her apartment. Suspect safe-word was used. They have broken up. JT  
_

_Oh God, poor Ana. _"I have to go to her." Without thinking I start to pack my bags while simultaneously trying to call the airline to book a ticket. Elliot is standing still in the middle of the floor looking at me in horror. "What? She used a safe word, that means that he hurt her." I am holding back the word prick as a descriptor because I know how much that upsets Elliot.

"You don't know that, Kate. Jesus why do I share this stuff with you?"

"Yeah, well I am wondering that myself, Elliot. You know what a safe word means. Even if she isn't hurt physically, she is hurt emotionally and I need to go to her. That is what best friends do."

Elliot storms over and snatches the phone out of my hand and throws it out the window. We both hear it hit the water in the pool below.

"What the fuck did you do that for?"

"Jesus, Kate, you will never learn will you? We cannot go running in and interfering in their lives. Unless she calls you, you cannot go back to Ana."

"Well she won't be able to call me now will she? And why the fuck can't I go back to her? She is my best friend and she will need me. She has never been through this before."

"You can't go because the information has come from Jason. Not from Ana and not from Christian. We are not supposed to know!"

_Shit, I hate his logic. _"This is different. You don't understand..."

"No, _you_ don't understand. Until they make it our problem, this is none of our business. Christ, Kate, when are you going to fucking grow up?"

_Fuck! _"I am not the one who just threw a $700 phone out the window. You are the one who is stuck in adolescence Elliot. I can't sit here and wait for you and your brother to confide in each other. Ana is like my sister and I know exactly what she is going through right now."

"You know diddly squat. Keep this up and you will be going through it too. Stop trying to solve her problems for her. Ana is a grown woman, when she needs you she will call, or don't you trust her either?" He is shouting at me and I freeze. _Shit, what does he mean by that? _

"I trust her with my life and what do you mean 'I will be going through it too'?" The light is no longer in his eyes. He is seriously pissed at me and I can feel his anger through the floor. This is beyond the need for a spanking or being tied up. He is furious. This is no holds barred disappointment. Am I that wrong about this?

"Kate, if you go back to Seattle right now then you are leaving me no choice. I will walk out that door and not come back. If you interfere in their relationship, if you let them know that we have already overstepped the boundaries by having contact with Jason then you are ruining 6 lives. Ana, Christian, Jason, Gail, you and I. People I love, people you love are going to get hurt. Don't you get that? I might not be able to stop you but I won't stand by and watch you."

"Christian has never trusted me, nor I him."

"Yes, Christian had his doubts about you and Ana and I have defended you. Right now I am wondering why we bothered. You have self destruct programmed into your DNA."

"You don't mean that." _I know he doesn't mean any of it. He won't turn his back on me. This is merely our usual disagreement. He thinks I shouldn't get involved and I think I should. End of story._ _Elliot Grey has got to learn not to threaten me. I won't back down. It isn't my style._

"Try me. You are being a selfish, spoilt, childish little girl and you need to grow the fuck up. You make that phone call and I am warning you Kate I will be gone." _Yeah, well two can do furious, Grey. _I turn on my heel and walk towards the bedside phone and pick it up. Turning my back on his impassive stare is the best thing I can possibly do as I begin the protracted job of trying to negotiate the first flight back to the States. It is a fight, there are no free seats until the end of the week, no matter how much I beg and bribe. I am vaguely aware of him moving around the room and then I hear him move out to the balcony to make a phone call on his cell. _I should have thrown his over the balcony. _Although I secretly hope that he has come to his senses and is trying to get us a flight.

I am not having any luck getting a flight out and Elliot is fully entrenched in a phone call so I go downstairs to talk with Dad about my options. He is nowhere to be found so I jump on line to try to find another way off the island. Half an hour later I go back up to the room to tell Elliot that he has won. I can't find a charter or a commercial flight until later in the week. He doesn't have to make good on his threat. I storm into the room to put on my petulant best but he is no longer there.

Panic floods through my limbs as I race around the room. All of his clothes are gone, along with his bag and his computer. None of his things are in the bathroom. My mind is spinning. I run out on the balcony to see if I can see him leaving the villa but there is no movement. The fear starts to choke me, as I race downstairs and out on to the street. There are tourists everywhere but I can't see Elliot. I run past restaurants, hotels, shops but there is no one that looks like him. Racing across blocks I charge in to Zanzibars but no one there has seen any of the boys. Everybody seems to think they have already left the island.

After an hour of looking I return to the villa, hoping that he is still there. Racing upstairs I find the room exactly as I left it. Suddenly I can't focus as tears well up in my eyes. The air leaves my body and blackness descends on me as I sink heavily to the floor beside our bed. He meant every word, I have let him down. Pain lances through my chest at the thought of him never coming back. Snippets of our argument fall out of the air, slowly at first but fast becoming a torrent that threatens to drown me. It was just a fight, just a stupid fight. He put everything on the line for this relationship, he trusted me completely and loved me unconditionally and now he has gone. It's over and in the end love and trust had very little to do with it. His words echo in my head. Selfish, spolt, childish - how could I be so stupid? All this time I thought he was too old for me, too experienced. Turns out I may have been too young.

_**Next book - Creating Kate - coming soon.**_


End file.
